Over the span of two decades, author, columnist, consultant and speaker Carol Bradley Bursack cared for a neighbor and six elderly family members. Her experiences inspired her to pen "Minding Our Elders: Caregivers Share Their Personal Stories," a portable support group book for caregivers.

Answers

Question

Well caregivers, 2010 is almost over. where do we want to go from here?


Finding a place for your mom, such as a nursing home, is essential. You need to have your life back, and she needs care. Please contact you... see more

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Is there a way to actually shorten the life span of my mother? I have been taking care of her for close to 19...


Please, please get some help for yourself and your mom. I don't know what is available for you where you live, but no one should be... see more

Question

What to do about dad? My father has totally lost it!


You'll likely need legal help with this. I hope you can get someone to advise you. Please see an elder law attorney or some attorney in... see more

Question

What do you do with family that treats you as an outcast?


I'm so sorry you are going through this. Families can be a mess at times like this. Do you know even one person who also knows the... see more

Question

What is the product that sounds an alarm when something is forgotten on the stove?


I know there are "smart stoves" but haven't see this item. Does anyone on the forum know about this? Could be very useful!... see more

Question

What should I charge to care for someone twice a week?


I'd see what cleaning services charge in your area. Just make some phone calls. Then, if you want to go slightly lower, you could... see more

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Can the adult child still pay for the assisted living facility while the parent is on Medicaid?


I would assume they could, but you should check with the Medicaid people to be sure. Medicaid is federally funded, but states have some say... see more

Question

My mother smokes two packs of cigarettes a day and she has COPD, emphysema and diabetes. What can I do?


This is sad, but you can't change her. I know of people who smoke while using oxygen. Firefighters go nuts over that. But smoking is... see more

Question

How do I get in touch with a Reverse Mortgage attorney? Money is running out from the Reverse Mortgage which...


If you think you need an attorney here, try an elder law attorney in your community, or an estate attorney. If the money is running out,... see more

Question

Does Medicare help pay for hearing aids?


Medicare Part B may pay a certain amount. That comes with a premium, but most people with Medicare carry it, as Medicare Part A is more of... see more

Question

How can I tell if mom's bruises are from abuse?


I'd tread carefully, especially since she bruises easily and that isn't unusual, however, you need to be very aware. It's even... see more

Question

How do you obtain guardianship?


You'll need a doctor's testimony saying the person is not competent, and then you'll need to go to court. It's hard and can... see more

Question

My sister is using durable POA to keep mother's medical information undisclosed to family. She had mother decl...


This is a nasty family problem, and the POA makes it legal. However, an elder attorney may be able to help. Good luck with this. It's... see more

Question

My 95-year-old mother has chronic UTI's from e-coli. She is now resistant to several antibiotics; eats yogurt...


There are probiotic pills that may help boost her immune system. Yogurt has one kind of "good bacteria," but the pills (available... see more

Question

How do I expedite a direct deposit to nursing home before the vet gets discharged for nonpayment?


I'd call an elder law attorney, or even a bank to see what is possible. You need expert help now from someone to whom you can give more... see more

Question

Will social security pay a family member to care for a patient in their home? most people can not work and car...


They generally don't pay for this. You are in a similar situation to millions of other adult children. I'd suggest you go to your... see more

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My fiancée's mother is in a dementia care home. He lives in her house and would like me to move in. How can he...


This will depend on whose name the home is in, who as Power of Attorney for his mother (if anyone), how her will reads if she has one, and... see more

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As a caregiver, how are you managing to take care of your own health?


I wish we all knew the answer to this. It's so easy to say and so hard to do. Hiring help, asking friends, etc. are ways that help some... see more

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Dad has dementia and is angry and crazy. He pays the bills, but he is spending money like a madman. They'll be...


It sounds to me as if you need a third pary to intervene. Family members will only make him mad. Does he have an old friend he'll... see more

Question

My father-in-law needs assistance during the day at home. Can the VA help with of this service?


You'll have to check with the VA locally. In some areas, they provide in-home service (limited), while in others they don't. Most... see more

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