Over the span of two decades, author, columnist, consultant and speaker Carol Bradley Bursack cared for a neighbor and six elderly family members. Her experiences inspired her to pen "Minding Our Elders: Caregivers Share Their Personal Stories," a portable support group book for caregivers.

Answers

Question

If my 71-year-old mother collects annual SS income that is less than $10,000, can I get paid to take care of h...


Is she on Medicaid? I'd check with them as there are some programs that can help. Not as much as there should be, but it's a start.... see more

Question

My mom had a heart attack and stroke and yells at me for no reason. Is this normal behavior?


Strokes can bring on dementia - a vascular dementia. Even without that, a personality change should be looked into. This is very hard to... see more

Question

Is it right or wrong for an elderly parent to pay their child for care?


I think eventually your mother will have to face reality, unless your husband and kids are okay with years of this separation. You have... see more

Question

Should mom sell her stocks and pay off her mortgage?


I would see a fiancial adviser about this. It's a pretty complicated situation and you need expert advice. It should pay you in the... see more

Question

My 87-year-old mother will be moving in with me and my husband. How will she pay for her food and other expen...


You are wise to ask early. She can pay you but you need to keep good records. To be totally safe legally, I'd have an attorney draw up... see more

Question

What is the best depression medicine for someone with dementia?


That depends on the individual's body chemistry. It may end up a trial and error situation. Some people do well on any antidepressant... see more

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I don't want to put my father in a home, so I'll need to quit my job to care for him. How can I get financial...


This is not easy. First, I'd advise that you read this article: www.agingcare.com/135476 Then, go to the state Web site and look under... see more

Question

My dad's nose drips clear watery fluid and it's a real problem for him. What is it?


The fact that he can't take a decongestant makes it hard. There are some allergy medications that act differently, so you should ask... see more

Question

Can a local government declare you a "business" and charge taxes from income for caring for your own mother in...


Much depends on the amount of money you are getting paid (I would think). I think you need to see a business attorney about this, since all... see more

Question

Where can I get adult pullups and bed pads?


You can try online, or maybe a health supply store. It could even be that Walmart or Kmart has a better price on those items. Any ideas out... see more

Question

If my mother is diagnosed with Alzheimer's Disease, will she be disqualified for life insurance?


It could make it much harder to get. You could try going through a group such as AARP. She will have a hard time getting it without a group... see more

Question

How do you start a conversation with your parent about moving to Assisted Living?


Gradually, if possible. If you know of any centers where your elder has connections, that can help. A third party is always good - do you... see more

Question

How can I educate the spouse of an Alzhiemer's patient who is in denial and make him accept the reality of the...


There is no easy way. This is a huge shock for them. The person they have been married to is "disappearing." Some adjust and some... see more

Question

Can my mother still qualify for Independent Living if her house was recently foreclosed?


You'd probably have to see an attorney for this. No doubt her finances are complicated and there's no easy answer. Please do check... see more

Question

My mother has conversations with relatives who have died. Why is this happening and what can I do?


This is common with dementia. She remembers them and wherever she is - likely her childhood home - to her it all seems real. My dad used... see more

Question

My father with dementia plays with the "contents" inside of his adult diaper. How can I stop him from doing th...


This is so hard as we think of the health issues involved, let alone the messes to be cleaned up. I'm assuming your dad has dementia... see more

Question

Will Medicare or Medicaid pay me for taking care of my dad at home?


You may want to read this article: www.agingcare.com/135476 Also, go to your state's Web site under aging services and find contact... see more

Question

How do I tell my mother that she has to stay in the nursing home?


You may find comfort in this article: https://www.agingcare.com/138005 This is a hard thing to deal with and most of us go through it. You... see more

Question

Are there different stages of dementia?


There are different types of dementia, but Alzheimer's is the most common. You may want to read this article about the stages:... see more

Question

My mom has a $9,000 debt to a magazine clearing house company. How liable is someone with dementia for outrage...


My mother had $1000 and I thought that was bad, but I found it early and cancelled her credit card. This is truly outrageous. Your mother... see more

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