Over the span of two decades, author, columnist, consultant and speaker Carol Bradley Bursack cared for a neighbor and six elderly family members. Her experiences inspired her to pen "Minding Our Elders: Caregivers Share Their Personal Stories," a portable support group book for caregivers.

Answers

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My husband's grandma passed away in January of this year. He is the trustee of her trust. Should we have her t...


Since she was alive in 2011, the estate may owe taxes (or get a refund if you over paid quarterly taxes). I'd check with a tax... see more

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How do you deal with urine retention/hesitation in your elderly mom with Alzheimer's and Dementia?


I'm afraid the doctor is the only option. If she doesn't have a UTI, it's more likely her brain is not giving her bladder the... see more

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How do I "force" my parents into assisted living?


You can try to enlist the aid of the doctor. You also could ask Social Services to do a welfare check on them. From the sound of things,... see more

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Is it wrong to hope someone dies?


Don't feel guilty. Your are human and thoughts are only thoughts. Accepting that your mom won't ever change, that she has a mental... see more

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What can I do to help my grandmother with cognitive interaction when she's blind?


Joyce has several excellent suggestions. I'd add to that only to say that anything that stimulates her other senses in a way she likes... see more

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Are there any published standards for paying a caregiver or suggested percentages for compensation from the re...


I'm happy your uncle is doing this. If a standard is needed, you could check with the hourly rates at an in-home care agency. However,... see more

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Anyone have the horrible fate of deciding if mom lives or dies?


BHenson,
I'm so sorry about your brother's attitude. It's hard to understand. Hugs to you and blessings.
Carol

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Anyone have the horrible fate of deciding if mom lives or dies?


I'm so sorry about your mother. It all sounds horrible, but you are NOT a bad person to want to follow her wishes see an end to the... see more

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What do I do when I feel burned out, depressed and somewhat suicidal?


Rachel, you are at a point where you need to think about a nursing home for your mom. Please read this article - you'll know you... see more

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I am going to be shopping around for Home Care for my elderly mom. What are some good questions to ask?


My feeling is go with your gut. Do you like the people? The atmosphere? Or is there something that makes you feel that they are just in... see more

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What happens when after all the rigormorole with applying for Medicaid, the applicant is denied or penalized?


Hi Shai, I don't think you'd be held responsible. Medicaid qualification takes time. The house being for sale may be slowing things... see more

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What can we do if we suspect POA fraud?


If you uncle is cognitively sound, there may not be much you can do, however, if he's got some dementia issues and the POA is recent,... see more

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Is there anyway that you can make siblings take care of a alcoholic parent?


Isn't your husband involved? He needs to talk to his siblings. This shouldn't all be falling on you. Alcoholic or not, the woman... see more

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My mother's supplemental insurance cancelled due to "prior medical history". Can they do that??


This is outrageous, but I'm afraid it's done all the time. Miss a payment by a day, and you give up the coverage and start over.... see more

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My mother has sold her house and wants to give some the money to her sons. What happens if she needs a nursing...


Right on, Jeannegibbs! Five years is the magic number as far as Medicaid is concerned. Seeing an estate attorney or elder law attorney is a... see more

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Setting up a family meeting, do we tell my MIL about the family meeting with her?


Your family is doing the right thing. You know her best. It would be nice to let her know you all want to visit, but don't let her know... see more

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My mom just put her 96-year-old mother (my nana) in assisted living yesterday. Nana said some very UGLY thing...


Cattails said it all - I'm just seconding what she said. Support your mom, try to understand Nana and continue telling your mom that... see more

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What goes through a very alert mind when they were told they have lung cancer?


I;m sorry to hear about this. Much depends on the person's philosophy of life, including religious beliefs, I would think. He or she... see more

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How do I know when to let go when mom refuses to do what the doctor says?


This is really tough, but unless your mother has signed HIPAA forms or through some other means give the doctor permission to release... see more

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How to deal with the loss of a spouse when the partner has dementia?


Hi Jacksmom, This is so sad. You have the right idea that with most things it's best to just meet her where she is. But you can't... see more

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