Ever just want to tear your hair out, or someone else's? If you cannot restore a sense of balance, you will run away from home? Just want to say some things without the constraints of staying on topic? Well, this thread is for you! If you just need a short break to let it all hang out, be a brat, then come on, you can do it. No holding back! Go for it, you can do it.
Last Saturday, my husband and son were going out to help his brother work on a car. "Oh, honey, want to come with? We'll get to see bro and his wife, maybe you'll get to see fave niece...hmm? I *promise* that's the only stop." I declined politely, since his bro lives about 15 miles from FIL and MIL. There is *always a need to stop* at FIL and MIL's house now after her hospitalization and rehab in Feb, and they are still trying to get *me* since their son is "so busy" and I "only work part-time" (2 jobs 30-40 hours plus this is tax season for a couple of extra clients) to manage an ever-changing and increasing list of things they want done for them. I have told hubs not my circus. I worked on a client's taxes at my home. Come to find out later that hubs "just happened to stop by his parents and spent 15 minutes catching up". He griped about the tasks to be done and he spent about 15 minutes. Ya know it always used to take hours to do their list when I used to go and husband sat watching TV with FIL while I manage MIL with Parkinsons and her to-do list...
You know, I wouldn't recommend you phrase it like this or anything, but what my SIL once said to my mother was 'we'd rather you came to us, because if we come to your house for lunch it wastes the whole day.' Not the most gracious way of putting it; but it is much better to be clear about what you yourself are happy to do, and if your husband wants to go and unblock drains and change lightbulbs and reboot the computer or whatever, then good luck and your blessing to him.
As for the favourite niece ploy - tchah. Do you look like you were born yesterday?!
The stop turned out to be related to the attempt to sell MIL's car. Hubs is the one organizing the trip to dealership to get bid, emails to get alternate bid from on-line broker ( I did help with that by entering info that hubs gathered while he was driving us to dinner), hubs (not FIL) driving MIL's car 45 miles each way to Carmax to get evaluated and bid to purchase, driving back up 55 miles each way to MIL/FIL house to take pics of car for on-line alternate bid because "we can't just take the first one"...and not one offer to pay for gas or a meal for hubs or grandson. My husband was offered part of a sandwich that FIL had ordered for himself and didn't want. *Huh.*
MIL has been trying to get me to do their taxes for free since February. I told hubs that he is financial POA for each of them AFTER the other one DIES (not by incompetence). His parents can dust off their wallet (thanks for image FF), and pay someone ELSE to do their taxes. I didn't do my mother's or my father's taxes, not free or for pay. My sister - who my son at college lives with - PAYS me to do her taxes every year and every other trip down insists on buying tank of gas to share visit costs since she doesn't drive up. My brother PAYS me for tax advice when he asks because he's now doing contract labor and been called a zillion times by former bosses for "free advice" after he left:) FIL/MIL have the money, believe me - FIL and MIL just believe that "family ought to do it and not expect..." Well, as long as it's not them being asked, that is.... sorry about rant. And I've been a hands-on caregiver all my life -- but FIL/MIL are not the next in line for ME. Husband can do what he wants, I will help him with research etc. But it is not my job to provide hands-on care or free financial services, regardless of what any of them think including hubs on some days *who thinks he's evolved past parent manipulation*.
Posting these words: "Ever just want to tear your hair out, or someone else's?" was known to me as just a funny saying, not an actual event in real life.
For goodness sakes, don't actually do that....don't hurt anyone! I am so embarrassed if I have accidentally encouraged anyone to violence or assault.
Disclaimer,......disclaimer.......disclaimer.....and Gershun had nothing to do with the wording. Sorry.
DDDuck, You are ok, cannot imagine you are a narcissist (if that is what you said). And I for one am glad you are still standing after having to pass your sister in the hallway. I hope you can get out soon, have a safe place, be at peace. You weren't calling me a narcissist were you? Thems fighting words.
Lol.
However, beware of our friend Luckylu, I think she really does share bowls at her house....Lol?
I just hate to have to explain it is all in fun, because they might take the thread down again to clean it up again.
That means instead of following rules to the letter, I fell asleep without calling in for jury duty. Awoke in time to make the call and do not have to go in today! Phew! What a relief, another day. Hubs could not get his schedule correct yesterday, then his boss was so confused he had him clock out an hour too soon, clock back in, Lol.
Thanks to someone on this forum, after the third call from hubs, I just said:
"Not my circus, not my monkeys!"
He really is MY monkey.
He is having a difficult time,
But he's still mine.
Then, several posters arriving new to the forum this week may be fake or trolls. Because right away, they will become offended and aggressive at caregiver members who have answered but the OP didn't like their answer.
Those are trolls, and the dismissive phrase they use to put you off sounds so familiar.
Good time to quit smoking, save more than $240/yr. per carton.
My home is non-smoking. Please don't shoot the messenger.
NFD means no further details.
Me want chocolate.........almost tempted to put my jacket on and run out for chocolate. Or maybe go next door and ask if I can borrow a cup of chocolate.
Chocolate, chocolate, lets see how many times I can use chocolate in a sentence.
I woke up craving chocolate as I went to the bathroom, the word chocolate kept running through my mind, chocolate, chocolate, chocolate, then I perused the cupboard, no chocolate, "NO CHOCOLATE !!!!!!, I cried to myself, "no chocolate, my kitties read my lips, no chocolate they exclaimed"
Have I lost my mind, you might ask. Long time ago I would answer. :)
This article, snatched from the internet, mentions a drug in chocolate:
Probably the most influential love compound in chocolate is PEA, phenethylamine. This chemical, which occurs in chocolate in small quantities, stimulates the nervous system and triggers the release of pleasurable opium-like compounds known as endorphins. PEA also potentiates the activity of dopamine, a neurochemical directly associated with sexual arousal and pleasure. PEA acts as a potent antidepressant in both sexes and rises during periods of romance. The giddy, restless feelings that occur when we are in love are due to a great extent to PEA, which significantly increases in the brain at that time, and when we achieve orgasm. Some scientists dismiss this notion, claiming that the PEA in chocolate is metabolized too quickly to produce a significant mood-altering effect, but others disagree. Why else would chocolate be so inextricably intertwined with love and romance? While there are a great many agents in nature which boost libido and enhance sexual function, chocolate alone actually promotes the brain chemistry of being in love.
Tomorrow.............chocolate run.
Staying up late to make the call-in, as late as possible for jury service......
I guess I could set an alarm, eat my dark chocolate, go to sleep.
Then reset alarm to coincide with the store opening of sees candy, or forget all about jury duty. So many choices, and all of them chocolate!
Gershun, Do they have Sees in your area?
Gershun will maybe back around 3 a.m. when Daniel prowls. What is the other cat's name? Are you sure it's not you waking up the cats nightly, Gershun?
Ahh heck, if I have to eat catfish the rest of my life can't I at least have them on a plate
I have a See's gift card for the winner