Hey folks, welcome to the new whine/general topic thread. Feel free to use this thread to discuss anything that is on your mind. Caregiving- related stuff, life after a loved one's death, your own emotional wellbeing. Whatever..........anything on your mind.
just curious though,how'd you dispose of them?
Lu,
If allowed in your county, burn barrel.
Cathartic, very therapeutic.
You can do it Lu, when you are ready.
A new chapter for Lu is awaiting. :)
As for dad, I have my little torn out notes to his home care nurses when they visit him. It was just his health updates. The latest one was June 1, 2017. My dad passed away on 21Jul. By reading this note, I just realized that by changing dad's diet to add 2 Ensure Light to his daily meal was part of his downfall. I didn't know that Dad was lactose intolerant until he landed in the ER, dying. He had a bleeding stomach... Sometimes, reading past notes are not great at all.
I would like to just keep the happy memories. Too bad that it's all in my head, never took the time to write it down. Nor do I care to do so now. I haven't had the full blown crying my whole body for him.
re happy memories - I carry happy memories of Gordie in my head and my heart. I don't have much else left now but them and a few photos and that's ok.
I have burned journals from years ago. I think you do when you are ready. ((((hugs)))) to those wrestling with the past.
Needless to say, sister freaked.
Bookluver, as for a history of e-mails. I have all that too. Angry ones, sad ones, even funny ones, you name it. I sometimes think I should get them all, put them together in a book and get it published. I could name it "Caregiver's history of Family Dysfunction/Caregiving for Dummies"
Golden, the surgeon at the ER was asked to do surgery on dad to stop the bleeding. She asked me questions about his history and his meals. She was the one who told me that my dad was lactose intolerant. She then asked me: "Didn't you know that Ensure has dairy?" .. I felt bad then. But reading the notes, brought back the surgeon's words...
I find myself yearning for spiritual stuff even though I can't pray to God. I'm going to Google and see if I can find some internet site which has some soothing religious sermons for those with injured souls, downtrodden souls. I don't want a sermon on obligations and brimstones. I need ones for healing. ahhh… tears in my eyes.
The Lord is my shepherd: therefore can I lack nothing.
He shall feed me in a green pasture: and lead me forth beside the waters of comfort.
He shall convert my soul: and bring me forth in the paths of righteousness, for his Name's sake.
Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff comfort me.
Thou shalt prepare a table before me against them that trouble me: thou hast anointed my head with oil, and my cup shall be full.
But thy loving-kindness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the Lord for ever.
And speaking of them that trouble me, I hope the Lord will give some thought to smiting the workmen outside my window who have been driving me nuts since eight o' clock this morning.
When he passed away, he had no rashes or bedsores anywhere on his body. He had no redness on his buttocks (which means he wasn't suffering from diarrhea.)… And I just remembered one of the ER doctors found out I was there visiting dad. I saw her running to me. (Yes, she was running. Had me worried. I thought she was going to say that I wasn't allowed to be with dad in the ER.) She was shocked and in awe that Dad was bedridden for 5 years with very good skin condition. No bedsores. No rashes. She asked ME how I was able to keep dad from having bedsores in the 5 years he was bedridden.
Dad was never tested for it as a doctor would order a hydrogen breath test or a blood sugar test to confirm the diagnosis. Most doctors would use the old fashioned trial and error method, such as eliminating dairy from one's diet for 2 or 3 weeks to see if the symptoms will go away. That is how I found out that I, too, was lactose intolerant.
(Jesus' words) "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden light."
Psalms 143
Hear my prayer, O LORD, give ear to my supplications: in thy faithfulness answer me, and in thy righteousness.
And enter not into judgment with thy servant: for in thy sight shall no man living be justified.
For the enemy hath persecuted my soul; he hath smitten my life down to the ground; he hath made me to dwell in darkness, as those that have been long dead.
Therefore is my spirit overwhelmed within me; my heart within me is desolate.
I remember the days of old; I meditate on all thy works; I muse on the work of thy hands.
I stretch forth my hands unto thee: my soul thirsteth after thee, as a thirsty land. Selah.
Hear me speedily, O LORD: my spirit faileth: hide not thy face from me, lest I be like unto them that go down into the pit.
Cause me to hear thy lovingkindness in the morning; for in thee do I trust: cause me to know the way wherein I should walk; for I lift up my soul unto thee.
Deliver me, O LORD, from mine enemies: I flee unto thee to hide me.
Teach me to do thy will; for thou art my God: thy spirit is good; lead me into the land of uprightness.
Quicken me, O LORD, for thy name's sake: for thy righteousness' sake bring my soul out of trouble.
And of thy mercy cut off mine enemies, and destroy all them that afflict my soul: for I am thy servant.
Psalms 119:50
This is my comfort in my affliction: for thy word hath quickened me.
neither of us could remember how to fill in the blank 🤔
Did you ever see a lassie go this way and that
Go this way and that way, go this way and that way
Did you ever see a lassie go this way and that
Yup...............:O
So, I figured I'd just ramble for a bit since I've been reading over the threads
that I read and some people have brought up points on various threads. I'll just address them all on here cause I'm too lazy to go back and forth.
About the new Aging Care format? Yeah, I don't like it. It's chased away some of my favorite people and it's just not that user friendly, in my humble opinion. And I agree with some of you on here who have said that some really good features have been taken away and yet Dorker's thread goes on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on...........................................INFINITY!!!
Sorry Dorker, but having said sorry I don't believe I've ever seen Dorker post on any other thread perhaps to help someone else for a change? Wow, what a concept eh Dorker? Getting out of your own head for maybe a minute and think of someone beyond yourself. You probably won't read this cause .....................well we've established why already.
As for young people glued to their cellphones? Yes, but not just young people either. I think social media is what is killing our society today. Ironic that I am posting this on social media but hey if you can't beat em, join em, right? Why can't people talk to each other and look each other in the eyes? Ah, I'm sounding old but I remember Rosie O'Donnell saying once that she thought the internet was the devil. I know she was kind of joking but who knows.
Anywho, as you can probably tell I'm in a cranky mood today. If I offended anyone sorry, and Dorker's supporters? Yeah, I know. :P
though they may be less frequent and fleeting, we still enjoy the smallest of these moments
I don’t think I’ve snapped a photo of mom for pleasure recently because I don’t see the same Viking blue sparkles in her eyes anymore
The last picture I have of my Mom where she wasn't in a hospital gown was at my sister's barbecue. It was a blistering hot day. My mom didn't seem to mind the heat funnily enough. This is pre. hospital, pre. nursing home. I notice the confused look on my Mom's face. It's very apparent in this picture. Her beautiful blue eyes had somehow lost their luster. :(
They also bring magazines and read - not AARP. Every nursing home lady (and some of the men) need to listen to them read about dates and makeup stories from Cosmo, Marie Claire and Seventeen. Of course, PJ has a big following when he reads all of the Red Sox stories from the Boston newspapers, especially if they’ve played the Yankees.
I read Gardening magazines to my two ladies. They both had beautiful gardens at their homes before they moved to NH. When they were professors, their office building was across from the university arboretum. I stop and take pictures of the arboretum occasionally. I put the photos on my laptop and blow them up so they can see.
respect
Hearing a siren, I obey the laws and pull over, stopping until the emergency vehicle passes. Then, it is hard to re-enter traffic, because no one else has pulled over.
Elderly says, "It is a divided road, you don't need to pull over".
I state the law says to pull over, not only when one deems it not applicable to them.
I suggest, what if it is a divided road, you continue driving, but ths emergency vehicle turns or crosses in front of you?
I told him that I would look up the law again, which states pull over when you hear a siren.
I cannot find any exceptions in the State of California DMV.
Are there exceptions?
What do I tell him?