General topics.

I think I've got to stop reading the news, I've got this running through my head:

This is the way the world ends
This is the way the world ends
This is the way the world ends
Not with a bang but with a whimper. (T.S. Eliot)

And on a more positive note - I just got a text from nephew #1, they are at the hospital, labour started in the wee hours last night ....

cwillie, not to trivialize anything but my mom told me they thought the world was ending with Pearl Harbor, the atom bomb in Japan, etc etc. The news is a corporate business and the way they get eyeballs engaged is by using sensationalism and fear because it is free and easy. I had a journalism class back in college 1977. On the very first day of class the prof strode onto the stage and stared at us 300 in the auditorium. When there was silence he said, "Believe none of what you hear and half of what you see." It so shocked me that I have never forgotten it. Nothing has changed since then except the medium on which we consume our information. I believe God is in control, not humanity, and this is what gives me peace in my heart. I truly pray that you will have peace in yours xxoo

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Well, I did not see the News. And I awakened feeling fine.
Always good to hear the expectant news of a new baby being born
to your Nephew this morning, CWillie!

cwillie congrats on your new nephew...I hope you get to spend lots of time cuddling him!

It's a girl Geaton 😍!
In typical male fashion nephew's text was brief - "Done. All good. No pictures yet".

Congratulations CWillie. You are a great aunt, again?
Nephew 'thinks' it's DONE, when it all has just begun!!!
🍼🍼🍼🍼🍼🐥🐤🐥🐤

Did you get a blanket made for the gift?

I have one pic of daddy and baby E, she is a bouncing big 8lb 2oz but she looks so tiny in his arms 🥴💕. - I can't wait to hear what her big brother thinks of her, he's been "practising" with a baby doll of his own. We were worried she would arrive on leap day (well I wasn't, I think that would be neat).


I did get the blanket finished Send, I think I posted that somewhere??? I probably won't get down to see her for a few weeks, and then it will be a nail biting drive down with the rest of the family (BIL driving on the freeway 😰)

There is always good in this world. A new baby is one of them!
So happy for you and your family, CWillie! 🍼

I have a big sofa pillow that needs a new cover so I thought I'd crochet some granny squares with a flower in the centre of each, I'm thinking of alternating between grey and off white squares and flowers. I looked up some YouTube tutorials to brush up on my skills and got a surprise - British and American patterns are different! No wonder I've always been so confused with doubles and trebles and half doubles etc, most of my oldest patterns were written with British directions and all of the newer ones are American. This is as bad as when I found out American cup sizes (for recipes) were different than ours...
we poor Canadians 🤯

Good luck on your project cwille. Maybe keep doing a few more searches until you find suitable instructions for your pillow.

Wonderful news about the new addition in your family. Babies are so sweet.

cwille,

Just thought of something. Look for conversion references to clarify the differences.

I don't really need a pattern for granny squares NHWM but I had kind of forgotten exactly how to do the flowers, that's why I was checking YouTube. The differences in naming the stitches would go a long way in explaining why I was never sure if my stitches were right back many moons ago when I was making more complicated patterns - doilies, tablecloths and such.

cwille,

Oh, I see. I am doing crochet with beads now. It’s fun!

I am using nylon thread for it’s durability. I like cotton but not for my recent projects.

I am also working on some projects with wood. I like painting. I’ve painted them, added hooks for keys and other things.

Every time I finish something my daughters want it and I have to start again to make one for myself.

I'm glad your daughters want your creations. I gave up on starting any project that I don't have an immediate use for because I know I will just end up with piles of cr*p that nobody wants.

CW, I've kept my daughter's pottery ship and my son's frog etching and my other daughter's decorative wall tile all these years.

Nowadays they can have my knitted goods for Christmas and like it.

So my low-life brother egged my old jeep again this is the 5th time. My sig other installed the Ring maybe now I can tape him egging my jeep and the cops will do something about it! I am tired of him always getting a free-pass. I can't even park my new jeep out in the road because I am afraid that he will do more than just egg it. He believes that I don't deserve anything even if I pay for it. It doesn't make any sense but he never makes sense! If my dad was alive my brother wouldn't be pulling this crap on me. I just have so much going on as it is without having to worry about what the h3ll is my brother going to do next! I am tired of his crap!!

All I think about is 'what is he going to do when my mother passes away'? I have been thinking about fixing up the house and sell it just to get away from him! Maybe move out of state or maybe just out of the city. I don't know and it doesn't matter at this time. He told me that if I leave him alone he will leave me alone, but I never have or do anything to him. I just simply don't care enough about him to bother. He just doesn't get it!!!

This is my whiny moment!

Oh Shell I am so sorry you are going through this, that is terrible. Hope the ring helps. I don't know how close you park to the house, but maybe motion detector lights that go on if something triggers them might help? The idea that he gets "spotlighted" might slow him down.

Not to trivialize the end of the world, or anything.But what if you heard the sky was falling?
Would you tell anyone?
Would you be scared?
Would you be a little bit c h i c k e n ?

🐥

Movie: Chicken Little

Shell.
Have you seen the DIY motion activated sprinkler with online instructions to use as a security measure?
A perpetrator would get wet, and mad as a wet hen.

Countrymouse,
I have kept my son's hand print he made in kindergarten.
Clearing my collections, I asked hubs if I should keep my son's baby teeth.
Hubs said, "Keep them for the dna".

Shell,

I am so sorry that you have to deal with your brother’s shenanigans. I hope it’s resolved soon. Do whatever you have to do. I wouldn’t hesitate to try and catch him in the act either. Then report it.

Pam,

Thank you. We have motion lights all around our house because my brother has tried to break-in the house and the garage. But my Jeep is to far from the house for the motion lights to go off.

Plus, we are getting a new Ring motion light for the driveway because I have a feeling the longer I won't let him into the house or/and I don't talk to him the more he is going to get mad and the more he is going to do! It just sucks!! I hope the Ring catches him!

Send,

I haven't heard or seen the DIY motion activated sprinkler. I will look into it. Thanks for the laugh! My brother would be mad as a wet hen! I will look into it.

NHWM,

Thank you. The thing is, I don't want to be 'that person' who sends her brother to jail, but he just won't get the point! And the worst part is that people don't believe me. They don't see him for what he is...a liar, a thief...a drug addict! But I have no choice. God knows that my brother doesn't care about me or our mother.

I just can't let him finance his drug habit with my parents things or getting my mother's money (what little money she gets).

Would any of you report your brother for egging your car if you were in my shoes?

Thank you all for your support and ideas!!

Shell,

Well you know that I believe you. My brother died from HepC, directly related to his heroin habit.

Do I understand your conflicted emotions? Oh God, yes! Other people who haven’t walked in our shoes may not. I think they may not share our emotions anyway. I feel emotions very deeply and I know that you do as well.

I tried forever to help my brother. I even blamed myself for not being able to help him. I thought I didn’t approach him in the correct way. It wasn’t that at all.

We can’t help someone that refuses our help and with a broken heart we surrender. We give up trying to help them. We learn to protect ourselves. It’s a process.

Do I wish that I had a tough hard outer shell? Absolutely not. It’s what makes me, me. All I desire is a balance in my life. I don’t want my emotions to rule my life completely.

There are times that it is appropriate to follow our hearts and other times to use reason and logic, and trust our gut. Do you feel similar?

NHWM,

I don't want to help my brother. We were never close my mother made sure of that...I just want him out of my life!!! I don't blame myself that my brother has a drug problem that is my mother's fault because she could never face the truth about her golden child.

You are right, I do feel emotions deeply and I hate it. I do have a hard shell because I had to because nobody ever had my back when I was growing up. My brother has bully me my whole life and all he does is lie, use, abuse, and steal from me. He truly is a dirt-bag!!!

I know you believe me, but the people who don't believe me are the everyday people...the people who are in my life:(

Shell, I had to report my brother for stealing our dads truck while he was on vacation.

I was angry that my brother put me in that situation. He did it to himself, but he drug me into it by pulling his stunt while our dad was in a different country.

Hopefully you can catch him and get him incarcerated where he can get some help for his drug addiction.

Odds are pretty high that he will continue to escalate the situation until he goes to prison. Unfortunately that is how biochemical personalities think. No responsibility.

You aren't doing this to him, he is. Pray that The Lord will guide his actions and thoughts.

Shell,

I feel your pain. I truly do. I understand what it is like to live with a drug addicted brother. I lived it. Very sad. My brother was kindhearted but his drug addiction made our lives hell though. Yes, they steal. If you don't sleep with something locked up or under the pillow as we slept, it would be gone. Sad but true. We were close at one time. As close as we could be. I was close to my oldest brother and youngest brother growing up, not close with my second oldest brother. He was the bully. Now I am not close to my brothers due to various issues and yes my mom interfered too. It gets complicated. I had to go no contact.

I only wished that I could have helped him because he was a good person underneath and I believe in second chances. Unfortunately, it usually takes many attempts in rehab before beating drugs. Some do and good for them! I couldn't be happier for those that do.

I understand you having a tough shell. I get that. It's self preservation. I had to develop self preservation too. I feel deeply because I have a heart. I know that you have a heart too. I still had to protect myself and that is why I had to surrender trying to help him any longer. It was destroying me. I had to learn not to try and reason with him when he did not want help.

I am not advocating that you try to help him. I totally understand that you aren't close to him. I was never close to one of my brothers and he never did drugs, ever. Only my oldest brother became lost in addiction. I think the rest of us would have been terrified having witnessed the destruction that drugs cause in a person's life and others who care about them. It's interesting how some follow in their footsteps and others avoid it like the plague.

My brother had stopped drugs at different times in his life and became very successful in his life, even owning his own business. The temptation is always there and they are extremely vulnerable. Sadly, drugs had a stronghold on him for the majority of his life.

It's a medical problem. It's a psychological issue as well. Even law enforcement officers are recognizing this now. Going to jail is not going to deter them. My brother was in jail for seven years. Did it stop him from using drugs? Absolutely not. He did drugs in prison. It's a very difficult challenge. As you know a person has to want to make changes in their lives for it to happen. We can't make them want it. We can't deter it either.

I have enormous compassion for addicts and want them to have help. At the same time I know the frustration of those who are hurt by addicts and self preservation because I lived it. You are absolutely correct when you say others don't understand. They don't because they don't have first hand experience with it like we do. I wouldn't wish it on anyone. I saw things that no child should have to see growing up. That is my past.

If I can use the experience to help others I will. Otherwise, I try to keep it in perspective. I truly had total forgiveness for my brother in my heart which was a miracle because I did not know I was capable of that. I had to pray for God's grace. I can't take credit for it. But I can say that God's grace is the only thing that brought me peace in the midst of a very difficult time. Watching him die was hard. There are some relationships where we don't feel anything for them. I understand that. I really do. I think every situation is individual.

Sooner or later the bottom will fall out one way or another in your brother's life. They go to jail for consequences of their actions or they end up dead like my brother. The lucky ones survive and beat their habit and remain in recovery.

I hope your brother will back off and allow you to live in peace. I get that sometimes you feel like leaving. Hey, all of your feelings are justi

Thank you Isthisrealyreal for sharing your story. Believe me it means a lot to me! I know he is doing it to himself, but I hate that I have to be that person...it is what it is and he won't listen to my warnings!!

NHWM,

I understand that drug addicts steal that is why I changed all the locks and won't let him in the house; besides he would hit my mother up for money that she doesn't have then we would have to listen to him having a "fit" and him breaking things then my mother gets fixed on "having to find money to give him." The whole house turns upside down and my mother becomes unreasonable for about 3 days!!

And what really burns my butt is he thinks I am being a controlling bit@#. He believes that he isn't doing anything wrong. In his world he is right and EVERYBODY ELSE is WRONG!!! This is where people believe him over me.

I think Isthisrealyreal is right he is going to push it as far as he can until I send him to jail. He has never been in rehab because my mother just couldn't believe that he is a drug addict.

I am sorry that you lost your brother. I myself have lost a lot of friends to drug related deaths. It is sad. However, I have no feelings for my brother and I don't know if that makes me a bad person or not. I just know I can't have him in my mother's and my life!!!