Hey folks, welcome to the new whine/general topic thread. Feel free to use this thread to discuss anything that is on your mind. Caregiving- related stuff, life after a loved one's death, your own emotional wellbeing. Whatever..........anything on your mind.
There is actually ample room for everybody's car if everybody is sensible about it, yes?
The people staying there had a choice whether to go down to the dining room and if they chose not to,their food was delivered to their room.They also had a bus that the people could take to go shopping in or to an appointment,where they would be dropped off and then picked up and returned to their "home".
I remember they had a long waiting list to get in that place too cwillie.
I'm curious - are these luxury NH's common in the USA?
Who else do you have any contact with?
My question to you is - was she a friend before she became your caregiver or did your friendship develop after? In either case there has been a betrayal of trust and it appears that you have been taken advantage of, but if your "loans" were based solely on a relationship that she encouraged after becoming your caregiver her actions have been unethical and would be grounds for dismissal in any position she hopes to achieve as a nurse. I hope you had enough sense to keep a paper trail.
I never though I would ever say this, but couldn't this kid spend more time indoors?
Great video!
She walks better than I can!
At 16, I flunked the driver portion twice. Third time was the charm! Great driving gloves!😁
Found it!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FlP93lQqGWo
Maybe it is available on YouTube?
https://gem.cbc.ca/media/short-docs/season-1/episode-16/38e815a-00a97ef6f72
I've thought this through and my response to my brother was lets just let the doctors keep providing life saving measures and when or if my brother's ribs get busted etc. and he is put on another breathing tube, we'll cross that bridge when we come to it.
Other brother who has taken this all on said the doctors suggested a conference call where we could all discuss this as a family with the docs. I actually offered to be there in person. My other sibs have such oh so busy lives I guess conference call works better for them. (insert eyeroll)
CM, rehab down the road sounds wonderful, in theory. But my brother, the one who is ill, has never been cooperative as long as I can remember. My poor, poor mom. The stuff she had to deal with over the years. I imagine her heart would be breaking over this if she were alive to see it. Her last letter to us as a family she said "please look out for your brother" I know he and his mental illness was one of the biggest sadness and disappointments of her life. She dealt with it like she dealt with everything. With grace and class and above all faith. So, I guess the least we as a family can do is try to measure up and do the same.
Stop empathising. You cannot imagine what your brother is experiencing because the inside of his head and yours are utterly different. I don't mean to suggest that he isn't suffering, but he isn't in the way that you would; and besides you can't deal with it. It doesn't *help*.
To make this decision ethically you have to detach. That is not the same thing as saying "oh well let him kill himself." You need to step back so that you can look at the whole picture; and actually that may change everybody's thinking.
You want some flow diagrams. We start here. If we do this, then X. If we do that, then Y. Keep plotting the outcomes it's reasonable to expect from given courses of action, and see where it takes you.
The point is that this isn't just about this week or next month. Supposing it were possible to stabilise your brother and give him a realistic chance to engage in rehab. Where might he be at the end of the year, next year, five years from now?
Still in residential care, still with a feeding tube, still desperately hunting food and drugs and any kind of gratification to replace what he's missing - forget it. You wouldn't do it to a dog. Let him exercise the autonomy he still has left to him.
But... what about, physically improving and with some kind of life yet to lead? In that case, it would be worth taking away his autonomy for now, in order to get him on the right track to make that possible.
Big piece of paper, coloured pencils, open minds, and everyone get busy. Even if it doesn't bring the family to one united conclusion, at least it will help you put all the issues on the table where they can't be dismissed.
God is able and His will will be done as it is in Heaven so shall it be on earth.
Hugs!!
God is able. And he will do as He sees best for your brother. Believe it.
Will be praying.
God is able.
Thank-you God!
The body is amazing,the way it heals itself everyday, even in the sickest patients & even when the odds are impossible though because
my Mother survived Hospice,her doctor's prognosis and all the times everyone gave up hope for her....
It was God's plan & He's amazing and there's no challenges too great for Him.
Hoping that I was not misunderstood in my post requiring the hospital to provide good care.
Hospitals and doctors have "standard protocols" of care. For example, it might be protocol to transfer a patient to rehab at a certain time. It is what is always done, and the care can be good, and covered by insurance.
But what I wanted to point out, some patients will not be served well to be transferred, or decisions made prematurely about a patient.
For example, in the patient's case I knew about, it was time to transfer to rehab, but he was not medically ready. He also ran a fever, pointing that out, he should not be discharged with a fever, so the hospital, at the level of care in ICU was required to keep him, and under the scrutiny of a higher level of care, for a longer time. This bought some time. Time to heal better, time to defy the doctor's poor prognosis, time to think up and offer some better solutions, instead of giving up when the patient was out of options.
To understand and experience this, it is a hopeful tack, but it is not denial of the realities a patient may be out of any good options. TIME can and does change poor prognosis is what I am saying here, when more options become available.
Anything can happen.
And you are right Lizzywho, in everything that you said. I just wanted to clarify and be sure it was not intended that staff was wrong, it is just the better options have not yet presented themselves. = TIME.