Hey folks, welcome to the new whine/general topic thread. Feel free to use this thread to discuss anything that is on your mind. Caregiving- related stuff, life after a loved one's death, your own emotional wellbeing. Whatever..........anything on your mind.
My response has been "go ahead and fall and we will deal with that then". Of course, she doesn't fall. She just wants me to walk by her side and coach her. She uses a walker but then tries to get me to hold her hand while she walks. That makes no sense whatsoever since the walker gives more stability than hand holding.
When I am cold and distant to her she scolds me with "Maria, you are going to get old one day" The other day, I almost screamed at her "no, because I am going to have the decency to die before I become a burden to my kids"
I am taking an exercise class that I hate (it kicks my butt). I'm not taking it for me. I am taking it so that I stay healthy enough to take care of myself when I am 84.
BTW, Mom, Betty White was 94 when she died and was still working. I am tired of hearing that 84 is old.
The thing that's bothering me most right now is that I will most likely not be able to visit my son in another state in January - I don't see this being resolved too quickly even once I get in to see a doc when my insurance kicks in.
Since you ask me to say so, this may be temporary and your mother may get stronger again.
How temporary is 'temporary'? Because the other possibilities are that you get stronger in terms of coping with her new normal, which may not be for very long, either because her normal changes again or because, God forbid, you're reaching the end of the road; or that you draw some lines in the sand so that you know in your own mind when it is time to call the nursing home.
That's very unhelpful of me. What I earnestly hope is that your mother is feeling temporarily weedy and helpless because she's just not very well right now, and she will bounce back.
On the other hand, it doesn't hurt to think things through. Forewarned is forearmed.
I am hoping and praying that this is just her recovering from the hospital stay. If this is our new normal, I will eventually end up putting her in a home. I did not sign up for this. If she seemed to be trying to help herself at all, it might be different but she seems content to just sit around all day letting everyone take care of her. Carol even told me that she would not take her medicine(pills in spoonfuls of yogurt) without being fed like a baby.
Please tell me that this is temporary and she will get stronger again.
Susan, my sister swears by a patch called SalonPas. Available lotsa places and she used on her knee before last surgery repair...hope you get some relief.
Hugs, Susan. Being in pain is just miserable. Hope it eases up very soon.
to answer questions:
no, my foot isn't bothering me, so it's not sciatica, though that nerve is starting to scream a bit from having to lie in one position at night to relieve the pain in the shoulder. Lower back is starting to complain too, because of that.
Current course of treatment until insurance kicks in is: heating pad alternated with ice packs,depending on which works at the time, slowly using the pain pills given by the hospital ER until they're gone, then tylenol extra strength & motrin. Nothing seems to be completely relieving the pain at this point, only dulling it a little. Daughter has been a big help getting me set up in bed so I can work, but I'm hating being confined and unable to move much without severe pain.
I hobble like an old woman now (don't you dare go there!) -- the strokes plus broken hip really did me in and I'm all bent over. So I'm going to try to escape this hobbledom and go on a river cruise next Christmas if I am able and if I can afford it. (I think the latter will be waaay harder than the former. Or maybe not -- dunno!)
It's quite windy out here by the lake, altho' I'm abt a mile from it. Gusts up to 50 mph and it's the gustiness that just about knocks me over. On Friday, it took abt 20 minutes to get from my porch to the car -- a distance of abt 15ft; when I opened my front door it *slammed* back into the hallway, my grocery bags acted like little parachutes as I lurched to the car, my journey to the porch stairs was a nightmare ... the fact that I am off balance anyway + carry a cane + the two shopping bags and their parachute-ness + the cold = a potentially *devastating* fall. (I know, I should have folded the bags and I *will* next time!)
And then the return trip -- two heavily laden shopping bags that I had to drag along the driveway + cane + major wind gusts + cold + getting flung against the car every now and then + my lack of balance -- I collapsed when I closed the front door behind me -- literally.
This winter promises to be quite cold thanks to "la nina" (la NEEN-ya). I thought there was only one -- el nino, which makes our summers so hot now. I didn't reckon on la nina. Two years ago, the polar vortex made our winter very cold.
Ah life!
LOL
Cooking a meat in gravy or sauce is another thing altogether, though. It keeps the meat moist.
Susan, is your foot bothering you too?
I remember the days when I was accessorizing my wardrobe with ice packs.
Hope you are able to sleep. Trying to find a comfy position isn't easy.
I haven't been around much....about 5 days ago, my shoulder started to ache. Then my tendonitis started up, which made my forearm ache too (same arm). It increased to the point where I couldn't sit upright at my desk to work. Bad news for a small business owner. Went to the chiropractor twice - by the night after the 2nd treatment, I was in so much pain I couldn't move. Finally went to the ER to at least try to get some pain relief, and xrays showed severe disc problems in my neck, and the compression is pinching the nerves in my shoulder and arm. They have given me a few pills for pain, but I need to get in to see my regular doc and can't do that until January when my insurance will kick in.
Sooo....for now I will work propped up in my bed with alternating heating pad/ice packs (depending on what works that particular day) and try to work on my laptop (which needs replacing) so that I don't lose too much income from this. Lost almost 1/2 a week's pay last week until I was able to get some pain relief so I could at least work again. I guess we'll see what the new year brings as to whether I need to have surgery or not. :-(
All the pitch men for RM have been men, like Robert Wagner, Fred Thompson, James Gardner, Jerry Orbach. Why no women pitching these products? Or like my late Mom would say "what would they know about finance".... [sigh]
The other one I can't stand is the one about the Pacific North-West (Seattle??) and Swiffer. Esp. the version with the woman with the screechy voice. If I don't mute the sound in time, my ears ring for an hour. Blargh.
Like every other winner...
Happy weekend, all!
Dh took his bike into the shop for repair after his bicycle accident. It will cost $30 but he tells me after I bought his usual $50 Amazon card. Seems now the money will be endless, so I am going to be smarter and get me some! Lol with an attitude.
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Have you seen the pig eating crisps? Oh all right then I do love the internet!