Hey folks, welcome to the new whine/general topic thread. Feel free to use this thread to discuss anything that is on your mind. Caregiving- related stuff, life after a loved one's death, your own emotional wellbeing. Whatever..........anything on your mind.
Do you suppose all the posts that wouldn't load have suddenly shown up now??
(That could be awkward LOL)
Check the sun, the moon, and the stars (astronomy, not astrology) for happenings that explain interferences with technology.
Can you listen to the radio, Cwillie?
Posted @ 8:50 a.m. PST, April 5, 2022 on a Tuesday.
:) dear llamalover, recover quickly!
i'll be a bit gone from internet, i'll return :).
"train your mind to see the good in every situation."
Tony and I are finally off to Alice Springs this morning.Via Yorke Peninsula, where our new transportable house is being built (and has been for the last 3 years, with lots of help? from Covid). The last 4 months on the farm have been the worst ever. I have now done the move between locations 4 times each way, plus some time in the city one-bedroom flat, and I am over it. I have more or less lost track of what is where, which is driving me bananas. We get to Alice on Thursday evening, and Friday 9am we each have a hospital appointment. Tony needs an injection for his wet maccula, I need the follow up drops and checks for my retina re-attachment. Then we sit for yonks waiting until either of us have enough vision back to drive back to the ‘shed’.
After that we intend to do as little as possible for as long as possible! Yours, Margaret
you have no idea how much better your message made me feel. thank you. just hearing someone's empathy, compassion makes you feel better.
i'm sorry to hear your mother screamed, too. terrible.
hug!
my mother goes through big stretches of time when she's very sweet. if there's stress/problems, oh boy...(and of course, this affects me).
peace, and staying away from toxicity: i really agree. i do really adore my parents (they are incredible people - how they lived/live their lives, everything they've done/continue to do).
thank you golden, for your message that warmed my heart.
bundle of joy :)
There are always solutions but we may not like them. I can't say I like some of the solutions I ended up with, but they did solve some of the problems while still retaining relationships - sis excepted. In her case the solution was definitely to go no contact and I am at peace with it. Would I rather have had a sister I could relate to? Of course! But drastic situations require drastic solutions often. My mental health is important to me.
I don't aim at being happy al the time. For me that is not a viable solution to anything. I aim at being real, being content, being at peace within even when there is not peace without. If that requires distance from toxic people, so be it.
Remember you are not responsible for someone else's happiness. That's an inside job they have to do for themselves.
some solution will come up.
in any case, today calm again, my LOs happy and in a good mood.
wishing us all a great sunday! :)
:)
golden, i quote you:
“That's the key - first no harm to self.”
yes.
agreed.
as is the case for many people, the situation’s complicated, not easily solvable, otherwise it would have been solved already.
example:
i have 2 LOs. 1 is sweet. the other one is also sweet, with moments of meanness.
it’s imposible for me to speak to my sweet LO, without the presence (and at times screaming/abuse in the background) of my other LO.
for example, on the phone. screaming/interrupting. (my sweet LO can’t easily move to another room, and even if that were possible, the phone conversation can still be heard in any room; the background screaming will still continue).
that means, that every time i speak to my sweet LO, there’s a risk i get abused. sometimes i take breaks from contact.
reducing contact is a good solution. i do that.
but i do want to speak to my sweet LO. (and i want to speak - at times - to my difficult LO: sometimes it goes fine) (i keep the conversation short when i see it’s not ok).
“It's very difficult for a person who has been abused in any way as a child to caregive the abuser.”
verrrry true!
“Don't underestimate that or your need for distance from the abuse or your need for distance and time and support to heal.”
completely agree.
but as you see, complicated. i want to speak to my sweet LO.
hugs!!
i’ll be gone a bit from internet.
i believe in solutions. i’ll find some way.
:)
If you are finding that you are being harmed (emotionally, physically, spiritually...) it is time to step back, re-evaluate and make some changes to look after yourself better. You are the only one you can change. I found I had to increase emotional and physical distance to decrease the harm to me. Less contact, stronger boundaries, maintaining the consequences of breached boundaries.
It's very difficult for a person who has been abused in any way as a child to caregive the abuser(s). Don't underestimate that or your need for distance from the abuse or your need for distance and time and support to heal.
how to find the magic wand against toxic people.
there must be a way…
if i find it, i’ll let you know.
:) night hugs again, from somewhere over here, to all of you somewhere there.
snoopy says:
“life can get a little bumpy. but stay on course and fly high!”
:)
snoopy says:
“stay close to people who feel like sunshine.”
:)
weather tomorrow:
snow + 1 lion
sunday (day after tomorrow):
cats + dogs + 2 lions
where do i live? very complicated.
but there are indeed weather-lions all over the place, even under my bed.
hugs from me somewhere, to all of you somewhere :).
Happy clock change tonight!
:)
hug! :)
i know it refers to the weather start/end march.
i’m making little jokes.
as to where, which country i’m in. very complicated.
somewhere :).
(lots of snow 31 march)
(hence, out like a lion)
there, another lion just crawled by. 🦁
goodnight :)
Not in the U.S., if boj is saying goodnight, she does not live in the U.S., where it is now daytime throughout.
Keep in mind that the "in like a lion, and out like a lamb" references the weather in March, not real lions.
on my way out from my blanket, to the window, i saw another lion crawling by.
i’m now back under the covers, and will continue reading my novel.
goodnight everyone!!
please try to relax. it’s tough, with all our love & caring.
return the love & caring to yourself. :)
my new motto:
keep calm and blame all things on murphy’s law.
bundle of joy :)
and lions walk about.
and now i’ll get under my blanket, while i continue blaming murphy for the weather :).
keep calm and blame all things on murphy’s law.
:)
Antarctica?
sometimes, lions even in june!!!!
crawling all over the place.