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Thank you for all the comments and input, yeah I'd say I am in a nasty situation, but so many people are. I do have boundaries and when they come up that is it I am done!
SS, Everyone, I am here. Getting ready for bed. I've been really busy with work and household stuff and groceries and Mom. I hate getting behind on here so much!! Welcome to you, Angie. Things are pretty good here right now. Wow, I'm almost afraid to say that!! Mom's new med seems to be keeping her more calm and relaxed and she's not getting up at night...knock on wood. She continues to be loving and grateful. I'm past my period this month and so that has helped. I sure would like to get away but I don't see that happening in the near future. Funds are so low and there's no one to watch her even if we could go. I've been going to bed early since I started this job and I feel so much better but I miss some quality time with hubby. I feel bad for him. We're so tied down. K, gonna get to bed. Love you all and even if I'm not here I think of yous. For you I am so grateful and thank God. :)
Miz... wasn't it you who mentioned health care benefits for care givers? What a sensible idea! I have put my business on hold while I care for Dad. I used to scrap enough money for health insurance that I never used. I stayed healthy to avoid the deducbles.
Gave the insurance up 2 years ago. Eliminated $300 a month of "insurance" whatever that is. Couldn't justify the expense.
I don't dare become ill now, nor allow my back pain to become an issue. Thousands I paid for many years, in the event of an emergency, which never happened. My $500 deduciuble was a joke (sorry .. fighting with the fickle laptop keyboard)
I'd like to see health care benefits for those of us stuck at home. Unable to work. Unable to leave the house!
I am listening to Dad, upstairs, hobble down the hallway to the bathroom. Another crap episode. He feels so humiliated ...I do my best to be respectful
Austin, good to hear from you. I can not take up the "cause" for caregivers, as I don't think lack of respect for caregivers is the source of the problem. I think the problem is that the individual (me) lacks the personal integrity to be Godly. If this nation is to survive, we (I) need to put God first. Selfishness grieves him. It is our duty (Biblically mandated) to care for our elders, and for our families and loved ones. It is not the responsibility of the State or Nation to do it. That is pure Socialism. We would like to think someone else "owes" us help. God will help, but he's usually the last one we turn to. America is in trouble ("going down the tubes") because her people want to be babied and spoonfed and cradled. America's adults don't want the responsibility it takes to keep us free: thus we are losing our freedoms. We are in debt because we demand befefits, goodies, services, programs, etc. So, we have them. And we don't get involved in politics (blindness or laziness) and allow evil people to be elected or stay in office. We are reaping those consequences. Unless we see this, America, and our individual liberty, and freedoms are lost. Those fighting for our freedoms are the true heroes. But the battle is fierce, because dictators and tyrants know the tricks, and have their minions. To be shortsighted, and think it's all about a single issue, (a caregiver needing help for a family member) is missing the issue.
Now, I understand needing help. But families are in serious trouble. Aging, widowhood and divorce leaves people vulnerable. Many are dependents on a State or system that wants to rule and dominate. Where are the men, who God ordains to provide for us, our children and our elders? Missing in action! Out fishing or boating or playing sports. While women work, care for children and aging parents. It is NOT the government's job to fix America!!! It is our responsibility. Unless we go back to Godly personal values (that this country was founded upon); unless we get God back in America, all is lost... This country will NEVER be "saved" by caregivers, but by responsible adults who seek God first, the giver of all good gifts. He gave us America, and we spent ourselves in oblivion. We accrued debt, and a "poor me" welfare mentality that precludes God. He will not bless that, but let our enemies (and our lusts) consume us. It's called judgment. Our help is found only in God, for the battle is the Lord's. Nothing else will EVER satisfy. He made us, and every good and perfect gift came from him. Yet we look to our government for "goodies." How many of you have been blessed by the government? That yoke is bondage. The yoke of Christ is freedom, for he is The way, The truth and The life. Everything else is futile. I found my way to God through Christ, and it is in him that I live and have my being. (Sometimes I forget that.) Have you trusted Christ?
Many civilizations have been built, and failed, because they all rejected God's plan (his truth). Name me one perfect country, system or government... There are NONE. We must stop looking to the government to "save" us. They take your money (taxes) and use it for their purposes. No amount of lobbying will get it back to you, except perhaps a trickle. The middleman gets it, or a President's wife for vacations, or a speaker of the House for her jet excursions. Presidents give it away to other countries (the money your parents and you worked for; the money your children and grandchildren will work for). We are in bondage to the powers that be. Do you understand that?
God says, IF my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways, THEN will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land. II Chronicles 7:14.
There is no other way, friends. We have rejected God. And America is about to go down in the spiritual battle. It's not about our petty little problems. There is no other answer, no matter how far and wide you search. It's about turning back to God, PERIOD. I am. Will you?
Miz, you are doing a good work, caring for your mom, and working, and doing what's right. You aren't a slacker, feeling sorry for yourself, and God will bless that.
rip, yes that was me. I have health insurance (not preventive) through the State for people that can not get insurance elsewhere. I pay over $500.00 per month and my deductible is $1,500.00. I have to have it due to the fact that I'm on quite a bit of medication (the reason I can't get any other insurance). It's really hard to make ends meet with that payment every month. I pray that you don't development problems that lead to high medical bills. I think insurance for us caregivers is a sensible and kind idea. We are keeping our loved ones out of nursing homes which could eventually cost the government lots of money. I noticed a bill that was passed recently that provides health insurance for, I believe, folks that have preexisting conditions and have not been on insurance for at least 6 months. That leaves me out in the cold but it very well might benefit you. That would be a very good thing.
Miz, If Mom is living with you, and paying a caregiver so much, why don't you have her pay you room and board. You would have to declare it on your taxes, but you can keep all your grocery receipts, etc. and deduct them. It would be better to pay you than some stranger. Check your area for an average rate for room and board and go from there. Mom's elder lawyer talked to us about this last year when Mom signed the house over to me. I get a check every week from Mom, since I had to leave my job to care for her. Is she living in your home? If she is, this could work out for you. Hope this helps!
SS, I love ya kid but I hate being preached at. that's why i avoid churches at all costs. I'm gald you have a new purpose with the tea party and I am happy that you are at peace with your god but my experience has ALWAYS been negative when someone starts throwing bible verses at me. Let's keep it light and about some funny and let's do the bible stuff on another thread. Whaddya say? just sayin. lovbob
thought this site s agingcare is suppose to be about elders . we all talk about allkinds of things , animals , elders , money , stress , blah and keeping us alive and enjoy this site . here lately its been all about animals , now its all about god , bible . now what do we talk about next ?? theboat theboat the boat ,. wooohooo!!! have a good day you all .
Aw SS, I'm sorry you haven't felt welcome! You are part of the original crew and we need you!!
We have spoken our minds here and I have always been supportive of that but today just felt overwhelming.
I love God, just don't like religion and what it does to people. Very divisive as we can all see first hand.
I'm probably overly sensitive because my bio mom and a few others were always handing out the bible stuff and it gets up on my good nerve.
I am sincerely sorry that I made you feel unwelcome and I'm sure that you didn't want us to feel like unwashed sinners either. Hence my suggestion to leave that stuff behind but let's stay together as a crew.
SS, hope to see you here and if you need a few days to think it over we all will understand and be happy to see you when/if you post again.
B321, I agree about organized religion, but have you seen the GOD bashing thread on this forum????? Those of us with pure motives and concern for this group are under attack by other "caregivers" because we are Christian. If GOD is not welcome, neither am I. Sorry your thread has been compromised. It was so good and so true for so long. I don't think SS was so much preaching as she was defending herself. So be it. You didn't know.
aww s.s. come on ! ure part of this and have been for sooo long . just isnt fair for u to disapeared and we re wondering about u ! plzz ! sometimes i feel like i dont belong here and other times i do . there is somethings i dont commet on some things cuz it doesnt interest me , you want to talk about the bible u should go to jsomebodys thread . i dont go to her thread anymore cuz i respect her wishes , im not going to preach at her , she done said no and that is it . there is a place and time for preaching and talkin about the bible . if my friends doesnt believe in bible then i wont talk about it . if they do then COOL we can talk about it . just like going to the store or resturant we cant smoke in there . sorry gotta go outside . i too feel insult but i understand theres people cant stand the smell of cigggy or they have breathing pblms , i respect that . just like school ! cant pray there anymore ! cant do anything about it , gotta respect others wishes not to pray in school . so we do it quitely in our mind . when people say bless u etc to me . thats fine i smile and thank them and i return that back then we know we one to another accepts it . but when t hey dont say thank u or warn us then we should respect them . when people have a rough life growing up , horrible parent they had , they dont have the upbringin the religouse ways . i did , u did , others did , alot dont . so we have to respect that . ss. u are part of this thread and have been for so long and plz do come back ! i love reading you and see and knowing ure ok . that isnt fair to me and to others that u say i feel im not welcome because u are welcome here and made friends here . bible says forget and forgive for those who hurts u . LOVE PEACE HARMONY !! im ur friend and plz dont leave me . :-(
I think we all need to take a step back and realize God made us all different for a reason. If we all thought, looked and acted the same, the world would be a very boring place! SS, you have the right to have an opinion as we all do. That's what makes the world such a fascinating place to live in. If we stick to the subject at hand, and support each other no matter our upbringing or background, we can get back to making each other feel good about ourselves. I'm with Bobbie. Let's lighten up and get back to having fun grossing each other out!!!
Deef!! thanks, man. Well said. OK: speaking of gross:
We have been working in the bilge of the boat. We found the ballast in the form of pig iron shot in bags in the bow and they were damp and I located a condensation hose from the forward AC that was dripping. When I had to intervene with mom Nik and I had to clean out the basement. Now THAT was gross. This is boat gross but according to Pat the boat angel, says this bilge is cleaner than an operating room compared to other boats. His mantra: no dark, dank spooky stinky spots on the boat. Nice. We have to haul out all of the stinky ballast bags that weigh 100 pounds each and then there's a pile of loose pig iron shot down there (about half a ton) that has to come out so we can see the inside of the hull and epoxy coat the entire thing. What we can reach anyway. THEN the ballast goes back but built in so it doesn't move. don't want to encounter big waves and the ballast is jumping around in the bow. Good way to sink. That's the best gross out I have this minute except for the fact that I walked in on a lady washing her butt in the bath house. I didn't see any feet under the curtain!! I swear!!
Man, I leave this thread for a moment to fight the demons[LAWYERS] and all hell breaks loose, as imperfect as I am; I like SS preachin,its who she is,she's consistant,I've never felt preached at .She's a mother for God's sake-of course she's concerned about the condition of the world,just as I am. I didn't realize untill I got on this site that some people don't even like their parent that they are takin care of-still blows my mind. I feel they must be a better person than me because I wouldn't take care of someone I had no respect for. My dad got the princess treatment because he was the greatest person I've ever known besides my daughter ,if he was a sorry excuss for a dad,he would be in nursing home.The way I look at it SS preaches,because she cares about ya'll, why elese would she waste her breathe. I thought caring was a good thing.
Hey Bobbie! Was it at least a good butt? Mom wiped her nose with a tissue at the breakfast table this morning, then proceeded to clean the table with said tissue! As for her eating habits, another story entirely!! Have fun removing the pig iron. Don't make it oink too loudly.Ha! Ha!
My question for today is---Is it legal for a lawyer to knowingly lie to win a case or would it be considered slander? Are lawyers legally immuned from lying-they are always talking about ethics-Where are the ethics in lying and twisting the truth to serve your purpose? Lawyers are pretty GROSS but they are not funny,never met a funny lawyer.My lawyer told me he use to be class clown, but being a lawyer has taken the humor from him.I personally think when the devil started suckin out his soul -the humor got sucked out of him also.
SS I did not mean to open a can of worms. I have been talking to those who come around to ask for my vote in local elections and state offices because of the poor conditions in my county for home care for our parents and spouses and I was reported to APS because I could not aford 24/7 care for my husband and he did not want to be in a nursing and could not get transportation to medicial visits because I did not live 3/4 of a mile to a bus line. Two of the -three of the people were very interested in hearing from me-one was a caregiver for her Mom and had no idea until then the lack of help and one wanted me to go to his office to discuss my thought and one reported the person who stuck APS on me. I was not asking for a handout just a little assistance because caregiving to a sick mentally unstable person was wearing me down-our state pays the highest taxes in the nation and gets very little backfrom Washington or our state. A am no longer a caregiver sinc my husband has died but I feel I can help others and I am not telling others what to say to their elected officials if this bothers them and I did hold down a job and run our home for many years while being a caregiver.
BOBBIE, What I'm saying is if I present all of the lies to the bar ass. will they laugh at me and call me naive,Also if someone is sundowning and a lawyer swoops in to have them sign papers,Are the lawyers held accountable. Are they ever held accountable.
Tennessee, It can't hurt to do an accounting of what actually happened, to the state bar. Of course that is probably run by lawyers too! It's worth a try to get the greedy b*stard in trouble with the law. I wouldn't care if I got what was owed to me, by I would like to see your brother's b*lls swaying in the breeze! Now that's a thought!!!!
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love,
miz
wasn't it you who mentioned health care benefits for care givers?
What a sensible idea!
I have put my business on hold while I care for Dad. I used to scrap enough money for health insurance that I never used. I stayed healthy to avoid the deducbles.
Gave the insurance up 2 years ago. Eliminated $300 a month of "insurance" whatever that is.
Couldn't justify the expense.
I don't dare become ill now, nor allow my back pain to become an issue. Thousands I paid for many years, in the event of an emergency, which never happened.
My $500 deduciuble was a joke
(sorry .. fighting with the fickle laptop keyboard)
I'd like to see health care benefits for those of us stuck at home. Unable to work. Unable to leave the house!
I am listening to Dad, upstairs, hobble down the hallway to the bathroom.
Another crap episode. He feels so humiliated ...I do my best to be respectful
Good night everyone .. thanks for listeing
Now, I understand needing help. But families are in serious trouble. Aging, widowhood and divorce leaves people vulnerable. Many are dependents on a State or system that wants to rule and dominate. Where are the men, who God ordains to provide for us, our children and our elders? Missing in action! Out fishing or boating or playing sports. While women work, care for children and aging parents. It is NOT the government's job to fix America!!! It is our responsibility. Unless we go back to Godly personal values (that this country was founded upon); unless we get God back in America, all is lost... This country will NEVER be "saved" by caregivers, but by responsible adults who seek God first, the giver of all good gifts. He gave us America, and we spent ourselves in oblivion. We accrued debt, and a "poor me" welfare mentality that precludes God. He will not bless that, but let our enemies (and our lusts) consume us. It's called judgment. Our help is found only in God, for the battle is the Lord's. Nothing else will EVER satisfy. He made us, and every good and perfect gift came from him. Yet we look to our government for "goodies." How many of you have been blessed by the government? That yoke is bondage. The yoke of Christ is freedom, for he is The way, The truth and The life. Everything else is futile. I found my way to God through Christ, and it is in him that I live and have my being. (Sometimes I forget that.) Have you trusted Christ?
Many civilizations have been built, and failed, because they all rejected God's plan (his truth). Name me one perfect country, system or government... There are NONE. We must stop looking to the government to "save" us. They take your money (taxes) and use it for their purposes. No amount of lobbying will get it back to you, except perhaps a trickle. The middleman gets it, or a President's wife for vacations, or a speaker of the House for her jet excursions. Presidents give it away to other countries (the money your parents and you worked for; the money your children and grandchildren will work for). We are in bondage to the powers that be. Do you understand that?
God says, IF my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways, THEN will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land. II Chronicles 7:14.
There is no other way, friends. We have rejected God. And America is about to go down in the spiritual battle. It's not about our petty little problems. There is no other answer, no matter how far and wide you search. It's about turning back to God, PERIOD. I am. Will you?
love,
miz
Is she living in your home? If she is, this could work out for you. Hope this helps!
I'm gald you have a new purpose with the tea party and I am happy that you are at peace with your god but my experience has ALWAYS been negative when someone starts throwing bible verses at me. Let's keep it light and about some funny and let's do the bible stuff on another thread. Whaddya say?
just sayin.
lovbob
we all talk about allkinds of things , animals , elders , money , stress , blah and keeping us alive and enjoy this site . here lately its been all about animals , now its all about god , bible . now what do we talk about next ??
theboat theboat the boat ,. wooohooo!!!
have a good day you all .
I'm sorry you haven't felt welcome! You are part of the original crew and we need you!!
We have spoken our minds here and I have always been supportive of that but today just felt overwhelming.
I love God, just don't like religion and what it does to people. Very divisive as we can all see first hand.
I'm probably overly sensitive because my bio mom and a few others were always handing out the bible stuff and it gets up on my good nerve.
I am sincerely sorry that I made you feel unwelcome and I'm sure that you didn't want us to feel like unwashed sinners either. Hence my suggestion to leave that stuff behind but let's stay together as a crew.
SS, hope to see you here and if you need a few days to think it over we all will understand and be happy to see you when/if you post again.
lovbob
BOAT!!
Those of us with pure motives and concern for this group are under attack by other "caregivers" because we are Christian.
If GOD is not welcome, neither am I.
Sorry your thread has been compromised. It was so good and so true for so long.
I don't think SS was so much preaching as she was defending herself.
So be it. You didn't know.
Wow, You're right I DIDN'T know! Thanks for setting me straight!
There's a God bashing thread.....?
Hey, I'M Christian, just don't like organized rel. and God has been in this forum since inception.
So Sorry SS!!
Which thread is it? What's the title?
lovbob
you want to talk about the bible u should go to jsomebodys thread .
i dont go to her thread anymore cuz i respect her wishes , im not going to preach at her , she done said no and that is it .
there is a place and time for preaching and talkin about the bible .
if my friends doesnt believe in bible then i wont talk about it . if they do then COOL we can talk about it .
just like going to the store or resturant we cant smoke in there . sorry gotta go outside . i too feel insult but i understand theres people cant stand the smell of cigggy or they have breathing pblms , i respect that .
just like school ! cant pray there anymore ! cant do anything about it , gotta respect others wishes not to pray in school . so we do it quitely in our mind .
when people say bless u etc to me . thats fine i smile and thank them and i return that back then we know we one to another accepts it . but when t hey dont say thank u or warn us then we should respect them .
when people have a rough life growing up , horrible parent they had , they dont have the upbringin the religouse ways . i did , u did , others did , alot dont . so we have to respect that .
ss. u are part of this thread and have been for so long and plz do come back ! i love reading you and see and knowing ure ok . that isnt fair to me and to others that u say i feel im not welcome because u are welcome here and made friends here .
bible says forget and forgive for those who hurts u . LOVE PEACE HARMONY !! im ur friend and plz dont leave me . :-(
c'mon don't be mad at me for having a bad moment!!
lovbob
hey castoff.....never mind anyway. i don't want to read bad stuff about God.
SS, you have the right to have an opinion as we all do. That's what makes the world such a fascinating place to live in. If we stick to the subject at hand, and support each other no matter our upbringing or background, we can get back to making each other feel good about ourselves.
I'm with Bobbie. Let's lighten up and get back to having fun grossing each other out!!!
OK: speaking of gross:
We have been working in the bilge of the boat.
We found the ballast in the form of pig iron shot in bags in the bow and they were damp and I located a condensation hose from the forward AC that was dripping.
When I had to intervene with mom Nik and I had to clean out the basement. Now THAT was gross. This is boat gross but according to Pat the boat angel, says this bilge is cleaner than an operating room compared to other boats.
His mantra: no dark, dank spooky stinky spots on the boat. Nice.
We have to haul out all of the stinky ballast bags that weigh 100 pounds each and then there's a pile of loose pig iron shot down there (about half a ton) that has to come out so we can see the inside of the hull and epoxy coat the entire thing. What we can reach anyway.
THEN the ballast goes back but built in so it doesn't move. don't want to encounter big waves and the ballast is jumping around in the bow. Good way to sink.
That's the best gross out I have this minute except for the fact that I walked in on a lady washing her butt in the bath house. I didn't see any feet under the curtain!! I swear!!
lovbob
Mom wiped her nose with a tissue at the breakfast table this morning, then proceeded to clean the table with said tissue! As for her eating habits, another story entirely!!
Have fun removing the pig iron. Don't make it oink too loudly.Ha! Ha!
you have a good point and I respect that! hopefully we'll all recover and the boat will be peaceful again.
Deef! Skinny butt. Takes longer to clean my butt. More soap, time and water!!
Tennessee, lawyers lie and everybody lies and it's hard for those of us that use truth to get through life.
lovbob