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Olivia, I remember you said you were the baby of the family and you didn't receive any help either. I'm the baby also,I Guess the eldest is not always the responsible one. You made your mom proud.
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Yes Olivia..I remember your name on here as well, my condolences to you on your loss. I guess everyone of us here will be going through the same thing as you one day as well...sigh. Hope you are doing well!
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Deef....

"I've got a big turd in my pants"...cracked me up. Oh Joy!....guess I am still lucky mom goes to the toitey on her own...hasn't crapped in pants too bad, just remnants of poo are in her pants...and the little bee bee's of poo around the toitey. Do you guys find remnants of poo in the washer? Yuck sometimes I do...blach! Poo confetti I am going to start calling it.
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Sorry, to hear about the kitty I do hope she comes through OK!
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Olivia ... how are you doing with the family visiting? I too, am the youngest. I dread the day we lose Dad ... so sorry.
I hope you're able to find some private time.

Where is Peach???

The agency ladies just left after 'evaluating' Sir. Waiting for the Home Health Nurses to contact me.
It's a start.
How did you guys find good caregivers? I simply need a few hours a week to be "off call".

Whats with us people on this thread & our unique behaviors & life styles? I too am a member of the braless bunch! How does this stuff come up?
Bobbie ... always Bobbie!

Yeah, when I stopped working for in the government & corporate sector, I didn't need the confinement for so little. Plus, how in the world can ladies live with those underwires constantly digging into your ribcage?
My simple solution was to buy 6 packs of men's tank shirts, the really soft ones. Form fitting & long enough to stay tucked into jeans.

Went creative with RIT dyes ... great fun! Tie dye is back in my life! Much of my clothing is bleach spattered from constant cleaning.
Started playing with a simmering pot of dye on the stove.
Then ...
I have an expandable shower curtain rod over the shower pan. Used it to hang shirts which steam out while I shower.
Started mixing the dyes in spray bottles & having at it. Hanes would love them. Shirts, undies & socks ~ color coordinated.
If the marbled look goes out of fashion I don't care.

Miz, I hope Sassy is all right. I know you'll keep us posted. She has a huge support group here!

Back to the @#$%^&*(! boxes in the garage.
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Hey rip, find any old treasures or just..."what were they thinking keeping all this crap?"
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still not in the garage, J ~
My life has been eventful in the last few years. Death, divorce, disaster, Dad ...
My commercial shop of 18 years caught fire one night, a few years ago. A faulty wall heater had remained smoldering long after it was turned off. Ignited about midnight on Halloween.

Everything was drenched from the sprinkle system & damaged from smoke. The insurance recovery people spent months "cleaning" my property. I salvaged the computers, plotters & other equipment. Moved the business home.

Meanwhile, I had to replace enough things like desks, tools, materials, etc. to continue working while the recovery crew held the major stuff hostage as they meticulously "cleaned" it.
They had a magic ozone chamber. Ha!

Had a downstairs renter who left stuff. Ex husband left stuff, Tons of construction stuff! Parent's good furniture was both here & at the shop. It eventually came here.

When insurance wizards finally released my crap I had double of many things. Some necessary, much unusable. Long process. Takes time to sort what is worth saving, what's not.
97 frickin' boxes!!! Some with a single thing, like a paper cutter. Others contain hundreds of dollar of unique equipment.

Dad moving back here meant his furniture, etc. needed a place as well. It's all here. I can fill only 65 lbs of trash a week.
Plus I have lots of materials which are large & difficult to move & store. 4' x 8' sheets of different substrates & the power tools to cut it.
Yeah, I have stuff. Just not the extra 1,500 Sq Ft I used to.

oh .. & yes, there are treasures. Sir's comic envelopes when he was in the service. Boxes of them. Another creative soul.
Some antique things I have hidden somewhere.

Dad's bedroom is decorated with a collection of things his father brought home from the Phillipines. Midnight Palm bedspread & Morticia Addam's wicker chairs pull it together.

The siblings never helped sort thru anything. That was my job too. Clearing out a home with 54 years of family wasn't easy.
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Yeap, that is me tennessee. I hope I made my mom proud I tryed very hard to take care of her.

PirateGal thank-you.

Rip
Thank you I am finding some private time. I don't have to worry about my family visiting they didn't visit when my mom was alive and so far they have not visit since she has passed. They have all gone back to work and my sister is getting ready to go on a cruise.
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Hi Olivia. I understand the situation of relatives who do not help you when you need it, and reappear when you do not need them anymore. I don't want to see anyone of them when my mother will go away. Nevertheless, if you feel better in their company, swallow your pride! When I lost my father I wanted to be alone, but we are all different.
Miz! Sassy! Please let us know. Sassy is too cute.
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Olivia, we appreciate what you did for your mom even if they did not...we know the trials and tribulations.....after you go through your mourning period you be sure to set yourself up for a cruise too!
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Yes, Olivia ~
Can you afford a cruise? Some kind of vacation to reinvent yourself? There's always Bobbie's Boat in FL for now ...

My family descended on me when Mom passed.
Suddenly I had a house full of brothers, nieces & the ocassional distant realative. Plus the ex & step kids.
Ex drove away to be by himself, deal with his grief alone by the river. They were close. He left his - my step kids here at our house ... with me. They were great kids & also very close to Mom. I was trying to be brave ... they were confused ...
No escape!
I was expected to cook & play hostess ... take all the phone calls ... be the perfect daughter ... all I wanted to do was hide.
Fly away somewhere, into the clouds with my wonderful mother ... who was gone from life.
I couldn't cry ... wasn't acceptable behavior in a family of men.

I guess everyone deals with grief in their own way. I wanted to be alone ... curl up in my bed under the covers.
Everyone expected me to be strong, since Mom & I were so close. Just like her. Pillar of strength.

I had no choice but to accept them all into my home. Cook our (Mom's, now mine) famous clam fetticuine. Prepare the fresh salad & baked sourdough bread.
GAG!!!

I remember my eldest brother, the attorney, dropping a single pastel rose on the coffee table in front of me. Came from a bouquet at Hospice.
He said: "I didn't know you liked roses ..."
Huh? I have 2 nice, well tended rose gardens! It felt like a knife! But I cherished that dried up rose. It was part of Mom;s last breath.

Shi*t ... I wonder if I ever had time to grieve until now?
Or if I will ever allow myself to ...

Thanks for being here everybody! I had it good ... Great parents, for the most part. Still do in most repects since Dad is usually an "easy care" since he no longer drinks.
Just CONSTANT!!! & fading!
No support!

Better now ... must take the bushells of used Kleenex to the trash barrel for tomorrow's 6 AM pick up.

Wishing you ALL Well!!!
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Olivia!

I am so sorry for the loss of your mom. I know how hard you worked and how hard it is now. Be gentle with yourself!

The Barbara B is here for you if you choose to cruise...
no blackout dates!

lovbob
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rip NO I can't afford a curise I have no money. I quit my job 3 or 4 yrs ago to take care of my mom. So I lived on my saving and it is gone and as been gone for awhile now. Where my sibiling kept working and not helping so they never missed a vacation where I have not had one in 5 years. But you know I would not change anything I would do it all over again in a heart beat if I had to. But who knows maybe one day I will beable to take that curise.
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bobbie321
Thank you I may take you up on that offer.
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I hear you, Lady!
My $ resources drained long ago while caring for Dad.
Sacrifced everything! Brother took Dad's savings ...

Sorry i whined earlier .. I get so frustrated being stuck here ... where I am at with Dad ... after trying so hard to be everything for everyone else.
I wouldn't trade it either, despite the traumas.
He doesn't realise he is my life now ...

So you are free with no resources & your sister is going on a cruise. How D@mn sweet of her.

What can we do for you????
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YAY Bobbie!!!
The BraLess Wonder ... now that we all share that personal detail about ourselves!
Do you have Black Out Breasts?
Put them away at times?

Sorry ,,, you can tell by my previous posts I am frustrated, exhausted & needing a laugh.
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.........................................................................Grandpa got home form Adult Day Health....and fell coming in the door. When he was on the porch, before he fell, he said snottily: "You Satisfied?!"
Great great...going real good. All my fault again.


I can't win.
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I'm not getting notifications!! I just came on here and checked and there are all these posts.

Well, my prayers were answered. Sassy had surgery today and they removed about a foot and a half of yarn from her intestine. She's gonna be okay. :) We will probably bring her home tomorrow. Thanks so much for all your prayers!!

I'll read posts later or tomorrow. I'm pretty tired. I'm soooo relieved!!

love,
miz
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Oh I am soo glad your kitty will be OK! It has been a crappy day for me and the good news, and my Leek Soup turning out really good and rips email made up for a really crap day!
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Wow, lots of "youngest" taking care of their parents. Me too. Interesting.
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Olivi, I'm so sorry that your mom passed. Please take good care.

love,
miz
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Thank you, J. :) I'm so sorry about your day. This is such a wonderful place to come to isn't it?
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Olivi, I am sorry to hear about your mom. I hope these days will not be too dark and painful I offer my condolences.
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Olivia, Take care and do what's needed to get past this sad time. Then get the hell out and start living your life! We're all rooting for you!
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Miz is right this is a wonderful place, all irritations aside. With out it. I don't know. Maybe I'd drink...Everyone here understands on a level people who don't do this just can't comprehend...Thank You all for being here for me and everyone.
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Miz, So glad Sassy is going to be okay. Give her a kiss for all of us!
J, Don't give up on daycare!
Rip, The braless 70's were the best! And I love tie dye too! I don't care if it goes out of style, I still love it!
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Sassy Yeahhhhhh!
My cats have rooted for U
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p.s. I heartly wish our good siblings a period of poverty, not too long, but quite a hard one, I think it will be a good experience for them, too.
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Thanks, everyone. Deef, I will give her a kiss tomorrow when she comes home.

As far as bras go, the bigger they are the more they sag (and mine aren't all that big). I wear push up bras. Hubby says it's false advertising. LOL!!
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Peach Alert!!!

I called her & she says she is OK.
Will be online later
It's great to have friends where ever you are!
WIsh we were all close & could have a creative B*tch Out ... Bras Optional.
I have a Fajita maker waiting for a party ...
Magarita glasses too! With Salt!
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