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Hi guys I miss kids not coming around here on Holloween-our roads are not safe for walking anymore a family on the bike trail used to have a party for anyone who showed up but their house was sold. Tenn I think it was PA where a women wearing white gloves or mitten was shot the hunter thought she was a deer and he got off,HC get her plain no name brand and tell her you saw it advertised for removing wrinkles-it might work for her. Everyone needs what our state calles a living will or health care proxy where others can decide for you if you can not make decisions for yourself-it cuts down on prolonging life Defer put pills in sweetrned applesauce check with a pharmacy first but they will slide down or sugar free jello J -hospice can be longer than 6 months and it is such a great program even in a nursing home because the person has an aide sometimes sharing with other pts. and the program helps the family and if the person gets better for a while it can always be restarted once you are in, I did it after talking to my son and joined an online dating service -just answering the questions did a lot for me-I am lonely and need a male friend who respects me and treats me with kindness. We had another nice fall day-I was not feeling good today and my cat stayed right with me he was so sweet.
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We did Hospice with Grandma here locally it was six moths that you were given, (not that it can be Guaranteed) just so the program wasn't forever and you couldn't be taking any medications to prolong your life just ease pain and make you comfortable. Grandma was really only on it for four weeks end stage Uterine Cancer. They were very helpful and responsive and once signed up thing were pout in motion, aides, bed, nurses on call...
Not sure we would end up with that really, if anything he will do something stupid break a hip go into a home and fade away there...Today he groused about the odd times and varying-ness of meals served...Look Fart Pants if YOU would get out of bed at the same time everyday The Meals would be the same time every day but one day you get up at 7:30 the next you don't get up till eleven and I have to shift your meds and meals accordingly...

No I didn't say this, yes I am ready for Hospice...
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So you get to adjust his meds & feeding around his moods, J?

How critical is the timing of his meds & how many does he take for what? The reason I ask is when Dad lived alone he often forget BP & other meds ... did just fine.
As long as he drank fluids & didn't get the dreaded UTI, dehydrate & pass out.

After hearing that his doc has him on very few meds which is working great.
Hmmmm ....
Maybe you need to keep him medicated? Sedative type?
How alert is he?
Obviously enough to be annoying ...

Did you find out how he got his bruises? Dad bruises very easliy, mostly when they try to find a vein for a blood draw.
Frail, silk veins.

What's happening with his PSA? I recall he has prostrate cancer ... but if his frequent pissing becomes a burden to him (YOU!) ask about a Foley Catheter.
Kuli is the expert, but we have learned to deal with his catheter on this end.
His prostrate grew to the point he couln't void normally. Lots of UTIs & back up poison, piss pain.

I can't imagine inserting it ... kind of like wiping an ass ... Dad & I aren't there yet ....
He has his dignity. Whew!
I have a nurse friend who dealt with all her father's needs with catheters ....
some of us never can. After our last ER visit which some of you read about ... I know to leave that insertion aspect up to the pros.

Lets face it ... I really never saw his wing wang until that recent episode. We've been very modest in our family.

Anyway, check up on his PSA about his prostrate. When it grows & fusses with his pissing, it can be aggravating.
For everyone.

Not having him piss outside the toilet or use a urinal might be a welcome relief to you. If he does require a bag, I'll give you hints. I've found ways to contain the drain & not have it dribble everywhere.
Simple dumping methods with little 'aroma'.

Any more about the ramp?
Hope it's worth it with his attitude.

I wish Dad 's friends were still alive to offer some social contacts. It's hard knowing he feels alone in this world ... the world he was an important part of in the army, sign & aero space industry. Being a real hot shot - now living under his loving daughter's roof.

There are times when I wish his memories weren't so close. He has lost so many dear people.
& stuck with me???
Well ... he has my respect, care & lots of doting animals.

A true gentleman who I think is content that he & my mother raised me to care.
Gotta drain his dragon!!!
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RIP - too bad we don't live closer. Your dad and mine would probably enjoy each other's company. If nothing else, they could compare catheter stories. I've been sick today - bad cold, sore throat. Feeling a little better tonite but off to bed to get more rest. Hope all have a good nite!
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Hey Kuli! I'm sorry that you're sick, but glad that you're feeling a little better tonight!! I hope that you'll get some good rest & feel better tomorrow!

Hey everybody, the Facebook group Crew of the Barbara B is up & running! We had a great time chatting tonight! Please come join us when you can, but remember no keep posting on here, too! We can't lose this wonderful thread that Bobbie started!!!

Hope everybody is having a great night!
Love & hugs!
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Kuli ... Is your job in a hospital?
I was very impressed at 5 AM in the ER when the young doc finally arrived after 5 hours waiting having non frequent nurse checking , He assessed the situation ...
blocked cath ~
* he arrived after the nurse finally, painfully replaced it ...
said "FIrst do no harm". Checked him out & went on to talk about talking with his elderly Grand mother's doc in another state. Asking them please, do not admit her b/c of her fragile condition & so many germs.

Blah, blah, blah ... thats why I ask if you are exposed to ill people.

I did a favor for a ped's doc, running his front office for a few winter months - became so sick with some kind of kid flu! My immune system was zilch for those germs. Down for 2 weeks.
I think it was the African strain that hit us years ago ... Terrified me to be weak for so long.
Mom was alive then & Cared for me.

You take care of you!

I think our dad's would have a great time, if nothing other than talking about their daughters! Mine is a gentleman, yet talks rough.
I am so impressed you do what you do. Please don't get sick!
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hey Peach ... I lost Nance!
Rats ... she is great! Love to get her back
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Now Sandy has a cold or something. He's at the vets right now with hubby. Man oh man, can anyone stay well around here? Hubby and I got flu shots yesterday, free at my work. Mom is getting hers today. Dang, my arm hurts. I HATE shots and I tensed up real bad. Good thing I had her do my right arm cause I'm left handed. Hubby and I get to get out on Sunday afternoon. Yay!! I'll write more later.

love,
miz
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Remember the Hemlock Society? Mom used to get mail from them but I think she lost ability to make those decisions before she made that decision. I'm with Crowe, I'll fiquire I'll just disappear when the time is right, leave a little mystery behind.

Anyway guys, my computer at home is down (???) I'm at the public Library now but I'll probably be off-line most of the time, I'll miss you and I'm sure I'll be running over here as much as possible til I can get the ol' broad (computer, not mom) up and running again. Be good to yourselves and each other.
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Rip, you say "stuck with me?" like that's a bad thing. You are so important to him and loving to him. He's so lucky to have you. He could be elsewhere with people that don't really care, but he's not. I understand about the lack of socializing for our elders. My mom used to have gatherings, dinners, all kinds of socializing. I know she misses that but that's just part of life I'm afraid. So many of her friends are gone. It's sad but I know that at least she has me and hubby. People she knows and cares about.

Have a wonderful day, everyone.

love,
miz

p.s. Sandy has a cold. A slight temp. He got a shot and we gotta give him meds for a couple days. He's been sneezing. It's funny how a cat's sneeze sounds so much like a human's.
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Hello Cgivers,
Miz, Hope Sandy is better soon. Hope that teaches him not to run wild in the streets anymore and worry his mom & dad. They just don't listen....
Rosella, So your little ones "help" you too? Shutup helps me do almost everything....I can't even go to the toilet without his "helping" (sits and observes). He must think I'm really inept. lol. I so appreciate his assistance with the dishes and laundry. NOT! Good thing he doesn't go outside & has a glass storm door inbetween himself & other kitties. It would be real ugly!
Kuli, Hope you feel better real soon. Too many little germs to keep up with. Hot lemonade burns it out of me. I spoon the frozen stuff into a beer stien (of course) & add hot water like for tea. Hot vitamin C is good stuff! Hope all show you more compassion and not take advantage of your temporary weakness. You know what I'm trying to say.
Rip, Sir & the pets are sooooo blessed to have you & you are obviously blessed to have them. I'm happy for you that your dad is such a good man & you care for each other. As you know, you have a one-in-a-million relationship with Sir as your father.
Bobbie, Where's our Captain???? How's kitty??? You two staying out of trouble?....at least not getting caught?
Tenn, I'd be wrapping my house in hunter's orange colored tape. Sounds like they take their bambie blasting seriously down there.

My mom's good behavior had a slight relapse yesterday. It's been so good I thought I'd take the chance & treat her to dinner at her fav. restaurant. WRONG! I forgot that mom & I have a no-two-days-in-a-row rule to adhere to. I arrived at her apt., cleaned up a bit, got her jacket & we headed off. Not a very warm welcome but that's OK. As I was disposing of her trash she got on the elevator & informed me that she was on her way. OK, so she won't hold the elevator for 2 seconds for me....I can deal with that. When I got downstairs I asked if she was ready..yes..OK & we headed out. I told her to wait at the door & I would get the car...As I was backing out of the park space mom jumped out from behind the van next to me & I almost hit her. OK, now I'm pi$$ed! "Maybe you'll listen to me next time, I almost ran over you!". She asked if I still wanted to go "Sure, get in, do you not want to go?", "I thought maybe you didn't want to go". My reply: "We can go or not, your choice, OK NOT!". She got out of the car & I left. I will no longer have my chain yanked by her when she is like that. Her loss. Whether it's her sugar (if it's high I certainly don't want to feed her!) or just some bug she has up her butt.
She later called to tell hub & I what was on TV as if nothing had happened. I have learned this is her form of an apology. Mind you they have told me repeatedly that there is NO dementia.
That is how I've set boundaries. If any of us can learn from it great. I decided at the time I was NOT going to waste time & money trying to make "cranky pants" happy and in turn prolonging my agony. It's been working, that's all I know.

Blessings & boundaries to all.
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Hey ya'll. rip. hmm let me see. If he was over medicated that would be more work truly, those times when he almost fell over. That was over medication. The bruises were an almost fall when he leaned to grab something and he tore his skin on the edge of a rolly table and I think hit his rib cage on the bar for pulling himself up out of bed. Dr said Tylenol and time so it is what it is,,,but we are to the pint of wondering how much longer...Gotta get that ramp in soon....PSA is to be checked in three months, growth rate slow...as is to be expected they said...

opened doors and windows here, will kill anyone or thing that messes with me today.....

I hope you are doing ok there...How is your dad doing?
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These people at Aging are really nasty...this is the second time I had to create an entire email account so I can get back in...new they would not like the nazi statement...but they are...so deal with it Aging care....
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was Pirategal....let's see if they boot me again..if they do I WILL NEVER COME BACK to their rotten site!
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Pirate, what is up with it? Did they say go away or just shut it off?
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When I came to the website it wanted me to log on again...and when I tried with my first one that I originated it plays braindead that it doesnt work...so a year ago had to create another email ...and now today...another .....they suck...they are cheezy that can't even say anything they just do it. I am going to find us a chat room we can all meet in and then they can have their bloody website all to themselves and we don't have to be regulated ridicously by them. Silly that you cannot embed links...they are just behind the times.
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And they never say what the issue is? That is strange what about if some one posts offensive stuff don't they tell them?i
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I guess not, they just find they have to relog in with a completely different email address...they do it stealthily behind the scenes....
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Do you have a facebook page?
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nope......cannot use any social networking at work they block
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Oh, That must be some firewall...do they watch you work too? every fricking keyboard click?

How are things other wise with you?
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Pirate, what a nice new logo you have! Is that the dress you wear when you take your mother to the bathroom? It looks like my dress when I go out to dispose of the garbage!!!! Ah, I remember the good ol'times when I dressed up nicely (not like that, but I mean all pretty with a décolleté and high heels) and went to the disco! Seems like centuries ago. I have 3 sweaters one on top of the other right now,
Ted, I am surrounded with relatives with Alzheimer, both from my father's and my mother' side. I am afraid my destiny is written. What shall I do when I realize that it hit me, as I have no children who will make for me what I do for my mother? I don't know. I want to disappear too. Maybe I shall get on a cargo directed to Polinesia. Please fix your old chick (the computer I mean) and stay with us.
Miz, Rip. Are you sorry because your relatives had a very nice life, with friends, a good work, and now they have to stay with you that are not as entertaining? Sometimes I feel the same toward my mother and they I say: "What the hell they should thank God and kiss the ground on their knees because they have us". No sense of guilt when it is unnecessary, please! Are you kidding me? (this is an expression I learned translating "Criminal Minds")
Castoff, my youngest cat comes with me every night to the bathroom when I get my mother ready for bed. She checks what I do, to be sure I treat my mother well. And for the other story you told... If you are sure your mother has no dementia, hers is a behaviour that means "I am looking for extreme attention, whatever I have to do, I shall do, even if I will lose a pleasant evening with my daughter". I have a very, very similar mother, at least she was like this before she got Alzheimer. Attention at all costs, even if it becomes self-destructive. She is no more like this now (her illness prevents her from doing it), but sometimes I see my old mother when (twice a year) my friends come to see me here. She stays in the corner, she refuses to lunch with us, she has a pout because she is not the center of the attention for half an hour.
What shall we do in these cases? I let her boil in her own broth. (stew in her juice)
Enough for today! Time to earn my living with another good night of work.................
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Hey Rossella!
Don't leave yet!!!
I've been wondering about you ...
You're translations . . do you translate to sub-titles? I've always wondered how that works with TV shows.
Criminal Minds, eh? I'll have to watch it. I've know a few ... mostly lawyers.
I feel bad that Sir hasn't friends living. He had many, all gone like his darling wife, my mother.

I feel bad that I can't offer him more of a social & interactive life since he is funny & alert. Still has much to offer ... stories of the olden days that'd crack everyone up!
Now it's mainly doctors & nurses who honestly laugh at his brief historical stories.

I wish he could use the computer & contact people of his generation, but his vision doesn't allow it. I'd be willing to type for him ... but the activity on the monitor is too rapid for him to follow visually.
Plus, I don't know of such a site.
Different from the Alz stuff ...
bright mind ~ failing body.

Disappear over here ... If I'm still going in a few years ... I'll tend to you if you're in Alz land. One trip to the river & you'd be hooked. The nearby hikes & mountains ... wouldn't need a memory ...
I have a great link to share about a family that lives at the top os Seattle's Smith Tower ~
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I know where they sell them. Let her have it. I was washing my Mom's legs and feet while she was standing in the shower and she pooped on my head. After getting over the shock, we both were laughing so hard, I peed my pants. She ate all the jelly out of those little pkgs. at breakfast in a restaurant one morning while I was sitting there talking to the waitress. And she did it with her fingers. I could go on and on with these stories. Laugh and cry with me as the story unfolds.
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Where have you been, Sunny!
Going to trap your webpage before it's deleted ~
More please?
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pirategal are u now a piratequeen ? im lit confuse here . must be the beer ive been slurping on ,. helppp !
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thanks Rip for the offer to care for me when I will be an Alz, too!
Imagine if I am healthy in my body and not healthy in my head, and you, the contrary.
We can jump on your car. You will give me directions because I will not remember the route; on the other hand, if you can't move well, I can drive!!!! This is called synergy.
Nice perspective!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Don't mind my very black humour!
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B/f tells me when I get to the alz stage, he will tell me we're going on a long car ride, sit me in the car with him in the garage and start the car......Problem is, he bought a hybrid - the engine shuts off. I told him - Great plan!
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HaHaHA, Kuli! Some of us can find that hilarious!
Stupid Hybrids ....
Go Green & it kicks yo in the ass at the end.
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I really shouldn't find that funny since the first suicide victim I found was a mechanic who did the exhaust thing in his commercial garage.
Finding him gone & my feeling helpess, no medics needed, is nothing to laugh about.
Having his family arrive & shilelding them from his body was unbelievable ...

Lighter note ~
How about one of the major cruise liners having a ship dedicated to us care givers? When we feel it's our time to go ... hop aboard.
Have the crew care for us ... if that doesn't work, the ocean is a railing away.
I hate morbid ... but it's something we will all face some way or another.
Animals run off to hiding to die. That's their privalage ...
Do people have the option?

I have a friend whose father has truly given up. Wants to die!
Lost everything when his wife / her mother died.
Hates Vanny for maintaining his life!
He's in a nice AL home ... making everyone there miserable. Nasty to her, horrible to the staff trying to help him ...

Vanny said if he had the option to hop into the ocean & end it all ... he would die happy in a heartbeat.

It hurts her every day & he doesn't even care about her trying to simply make him comfortable. She is the one suffering ...
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