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rosella yea the advise and the fake faces and the fun everybody els is enjoying just------------ my bro says is there anything he can do when he gets hom for his 24 hours after he has been gone for 3 months and then proceeds to tell us about taking people he dont even really know to disney land and it is gona cost 10000 dollars and mom needs a shower dammit let me stop are i can see to type
How many of us have been or will be alone for the holidays? I've spent several quiet years alone needing to be on call for Dad. This year we both will be at my home again. It isn't so bad ...
I hope there will be lots of activity on the thread come Christmas Eve & Day. Will be a bright spot for us.
Sounds like ya all are writting my life story. My first Christmas without Mom-so it's just pooo. I don't speak to my sisters-they were never around to even visit Mom but now tell everyone that I didn't care for her right--they didn't even go to the funeral--screw them.
True! just write it out. It's ok if you cry. They are so dumb and they don't get it at all. Cry it out and keep venting. vent vent vent. it will save your life! I am forever amazed about how crazy the siblings are and I feel for you caregivers so much and wish I had 10000 to pop you into a spa with all kinds of massages and strawberries. Your brother is a class A jerk. But of course you know that.
I remember the Christmas after Dad died. Nobody came. I think Mom and I ate at IHOP. I built a fire in the fireplace at home and was scared that I had forgotten to close the doors. Damn that was hard. Putting up that tree for Mom. Sucked sucked sucked!! Poor Mom. Sad thing is that some family would have come if Dad had still been here.
I gotta stop. I can feel the resentment growing and it's not a good thing.
december the 28 i live in mississippi 40 mil north of louisiana which is where i am from any way it ticks me of that then he has the nerve to ask if he gets a house and pays for tickets and food can we meaning moma pay for gas and lodging for her and i to get ther which is 1000 we dont have and as soon as march and not can i stay with mom or her is of course you all know what i mean
Miz, Bobbie, Christina, Truecolors, Rip Thank you, It is very nice that when one feels distressed, in the following two minutes many people come to help him and make him (her) feel better. The cousins meeting is in Rome, at my brother's house; the problem is that if I don't go, my mother will not go either, and I know she loves family meetings. Shall I be selfish and think of myself? Shall I be generous and I bring her there? I could stay for two hours in apnea. Christina, as we are no hamsters and no diggers, I see people like us as birds that fly, sometimes high, sometimes low. Very often, in order to see the landscape, we become absent minded and crash against something! (other birds, planes, advertising panels) Hard life! Truecolors, if you like Christmas, fight for your Christmas! Make a tree, put some lights on, cook something good. Just for you and mom, it's okay. I like mac-cheese, but you could make a luxurious cake without worrying about calories. Even if you have to sing alone "I wish you a Merry Christmas", do it! Please.
Marissa... oh my God. Bobbie, do you think she has already made her decision?
hi there , mind is blank , am tired . rossella , maybe u can drop ur mom off there and u tell them for cmas u want a break and poof off you go ? im not going anywhere , im staying home if they want to see dad they know where he is , of course i welcome them and keeping peace . im not going any where ,,, you could tell them to have it at your house :-) there thats an ideal , am worried about marrissa , prayed for her too . when u snap u snap big time and theres nothing anybody can do , depressions does people very fraggial moments of thier life . austin - you ok ?? i sure hope so , ask ur son for a snowblower for cmas , xoxox
Hey every one...I missed the latest Bite Me issue...mmhmm, well like anyone who comes in the middle of something they will be off kilter, but also they probably really do feel we are selfish, not nicey people to be resentful of our tasks and on going stresses of any kind. I think and psychology will back me up that anger covers fear. So it may be that they fear some one resenting their own care needs in the future. Or they are really angry and resentful and project it on us what they cannot admit to...or we are just bad people, going to hell, ungrateful selfish bastards...What ever. I am the Godless Heathen ingrate and pray nightly my perv of a Grandfather dies...shame on me? I really don't care... They are not here living with the shit I do, I have learned to take what is said to me by others with a grain of salt, a teaspoon of sugar a cup of kindness stir well bake at 350 and toss out the window... I DO what is needed I DON'T have to like it! And as for the argument "They DID for us when we were small.." Guess what, YOU HAVE NO FIN-G IDEA WHAT THEY MAY OR MAY NOT HAVE DONE FOR US WHEN WE WERE CHILDREN!" You are ASS-uming an awful lot to assume all of us had kind, selfless loving parents and grandparents (many here did) who would do anything for us and we now own them our life's blood in payment. Don't even half think it! For me I must edge the side of this argument, as I am one of the few genuinely bitter, angry post abuse care givers so my ire is earned, I will stick my foot in it and state what I FEEL about those here caring for loved ones, parents who were kind, loving guides fro them in their most vulnerable years, helping hands and watching affectionate family members...That they are dealing with tremendously complex burdens of not only the day to day caring for a beloved parent/spouse/mate/grandparent but watching as a once strong, competent, intelligent, complex individual they have known throughout their lives as an authority and friend is becoming a weak, failing, sore, sometimes snappish, recalcitrant and often messy child-adult. The cared for child, has become the care giving child as an adult. There is love and fear anger and hope memories of a happier time and a more cognizant parent now reduced to near toddler stage of old age, all mixed up with the ongoing, often thank less (if they could they would) grind of increasing hygienic needs and resistance to them by the loved one as well as financial/business tasks, that the parent may or may not have ever shared any information on with them, the social aspects of looking after all there Dr appointments and errands on top of their own life needs and activities pared down to only the absolutely necessary ones... When you were a child you adapted and were merged into your parents life, now as an adult your life is put on hold as they slowly lose body, mind, social skills etc....Every day seems to bring more failings and loss of abilities for the parent and a greater burden, yes burden for the care giver. It does NOT mean they love them less because they are tired, or afraid or angry or even resentful of this load dropped on them by choice, necessity, society, lack of funds. Family should take care of family, I have had spewed at me by cab drivers...and so they should, and thanks to modern medicine we now see more and more folks living to older and older (and more care needing ages) for longer and longer. What was once an old granny helping out in the kitchen, is now a huge population of elders with greater physical, financial, emotional, medical, needs...and more often than not it will fall on the shoulders of just ONE person in a family group. They are, if anything braver, and more kind, and more REAL than the family/siblings/friends who say they will help but disappear (till it is time to share out the funds) or say they "Just can't stand to see so and so like that..." Or are just too busy.... These shamed caregivers are more responsible than the social services that come and go. More competent even at times than the physician legally charged with the care of our loved ones health and well being. They have taken on tasks that yes, many of our parents/grandparents took on for them as children. The children THEY CHOOSE TO HAVE, then there care WAS their responsibility, when they were small, mindful, dependent, and growing in abilities and strengths daily. A two year old, will be two for about 16 months, an elderly person can settle into a devolved-developmental stage for a decade or more. A child is also smaller and apt at times to do as told, a parent has been the authority. If you think it is a chore to tell a five year old to sit down and eat their, supper try telling it to an angry, short fused, snappish older person who is well, still and adult Thank You very much! And one who "Used to wipe yer back side!" If they did so. "SHAME on us"? What the hell for? For being tired and worn out? For not liking to have feces on the walls and our hands and the floors...Yeah, clean it up! We do, day after day...with no end in sight. A relatively healthy older person? Who knows. This could go on for fifteen years. Your toddler would be looking at college applications by then, and you would be well ready for it, wouldn't you...? There is no graduation day here. There is the possible coming of a level of infirmity that brings a need for placing the loved one in a nursing home, something many caregivers avoid like plague. Ashamed to admit they need this assistance or saddened at the thought of abandoning a loved parent...How can I just abandon my mom or dad? The feeling of just dumping them twisting the gut like sickness...And then there is death...The inevitable and final Good-Bye many of us are facing day by day moment by moment or year to year.All the mess of the release of the strain and worry and the genuine grief of the loss of Mom or Dad finally and did I do ENOUGH and should I feel ashamed to feel relief as well as grief? The fact of the connection that it is ones parents one is looking after, doesn't diminish the pain and fear and burden of the caring tasks at time. There is a great deal of stress and strain and weariness in life, it isn't shameful to note it, even if it comes along with the daily care given to a family member. Are only nurses allowed to be tired and worn from the constant monitoring of needy patients, are only personal secretaries allowed to feel used and over run with schedules and the unexpected sudden things that come up and throw whole days worth of errands off...are only janitors allowed to be grossed out by a bathroom covered in filth...Just because it's family, doesn't make it easy, if anything it makes it harder, because it isn't just a job, it isn't "only a pay check" (if there IS one), it is a very hard, messy, draining, complex, chore filled part of life we chose in deciding to look after a loved one. Most of us didn't have a clue what we were getting in to. Now, we are tired, frustrated, worn out, hopeful, scared, still loving, "grossed out" at times yes...and NOT ASHAMED!
I am doing Ok, talked to miz bad weather there, but think she is OK.
Listening to The Beatles on Youtube here...
Did I tell you my Mom has tendered her resignation at work. My broken ankle just put the whole situation into relief and that I NEED SOME and he is HER FATHER...and HE should be paying for more around here...If he was in a nursing home he would be paying $4,000 a month, he still puts bank away here!
One more lil thing, I think will stick to "Bite Me" solo Name attached seems too personal, it is a general term, and will apply to so many, myself included.
Everything is so serious around us. There could be a matricide occurring sometime around the world from us.
it is so overwhelming, all of the mean people and the mean relatives. i am so thankful that I don't have any bros or sis and I feel so bad for all of you who are in the middle of a family but still so alone. absolutely unjust.
The River where I am docked is calm for the first time in 2 weeks. the boat is not moving and the water is like glass. No wind and the lights are gorgeous reflected in the water. Peaceful and I wish that you all were here with me. Of course then it wouldn't be peaceful! We would be having a grand old time and singing and indulging in adult beverages. Wait.... that's still peaceful!
Miz! sound like you guys have a plan! good stuff. love you a lot and when you coming?
you go girl ! well said it ! so is ur mom home everyday now ? my hubsand is home everyday now till jan 3rd , caught him doing dishes , :-) suppose to get real nasty out again tmr or thurs , im so ready for sprng , bobbie i saw on the news about oranges down in fla , so sad . that is so unusual for fla to be that cold , sure hope it warms up soon , maybe it ll snow in fla on christmas day , ho ho hooo .
need go ck on pa , he doesnt feel good today , lit whiney sleep alot too , i thought i saw a death look on his face . he dont feel good , i put flannel shirt over his t shirt to keep him warmer and tucked him in , you all have a good night , xoxox
I took the time to read through the earlier posts for a while this afternoon. It is amazing how the friendships formed and people are still together here! It seems like we are , for the most part, getting down about the holiday. I am probably going to be flying solo (with my Mom) too. Can't afford to have my sons visit from San Diego. I learned that Miz lived there for a while. The "shame on you" type of comments seem kind of funny. The person who says them ends up getting trampled by a stampede of caregivers! I'm having a glass of wine. Barefoot Merlot. It's not that great tasting, cheap. I was reading the posts to see if bobbie had bought a motor home and took off with Mom, cuz I feel like doing that too. I learned that it's not a good idea. She really couldn't travel at this point. I have, however, gotten used to driving around looking at the Christmas lights, something to do as it gets dark so early. Luckily our Honda civic is good on gas. Signing off for now, hope you have a peaceful night.
Ya, ssk, mom and I looked at motor homes and had a good time doing it but she was declining fast. I realized that we would be in the middle of nowhere and the physicality of moving her would break my back in half and I was afraid of what may happen and I wouldn't be able to take care of her or get her in or out of the thing. I'm still sad that she never got to be on the boat but wanted me to be on the boat. I have never seen such courage in anyone except my father.
One day I'll tell part of his story. Guest of the Nazis for a year. He was 18.
Thank you Linda and everyone else that was concerned about me and my fall -I am pretty -just sore but use to pain with OA and RA and Fibro and Poly and bad and herniated disc I do have a nice small snowblower but I fell I lot last winter with and we only had 2 inches so I felt I shoud get out there and clean the drive it is on a hill and I was being careful but have a history of falling-my son use to say I fall over the yellow line in the road and use a cane when away from home because of falling-once when my husband was in the ER I fell and fractured my skull -got two days of rest in the hospital, Rossela as someone else said just drop your Mom off and go do something you enjoy that day or go home and rest let someone bring her back when she is done. I love the stampede of caregivers quote people will learn not to mess with us folks. Miz it takes time-it was 1 and 1/2 yrs. before I had any good memories of the husband-and it was about 9 months before I remembered how badly he treated me at the end. My son hopes that I meet someone nice on the dating site after all the years I put up with his father-I have a friend from the dating site we have been emailing back and forth for almost 2 months and plan on having lunch after the holidays-I am sure it will be just friendship but right now that sounds good right now-he seems to be kind and thoughful.You guys are the most special people I have ever met-it was a God send finding this site-it just popped up almost 3 yrs ago-and saved my sanity-I was at the end of my rope at that time. Hope you all have a good night and do not have to deal with bad wheather it is cold here in N.Y and we may get snow on Sun, Maxine here
Whole lot of reading to be done.Child and myself went out on 4-wheeler in snow to fetch a Xmas tree-found small six footer and sawed it down myself and brung it home. I used to think I had to have a guy do that for me.I can wipe butts-I can saw trees-what a well-rounded person I be.Ted,somebody piss you off. Bobbie are you stringing lights on your boat.. My favorite ornament is a little sailboat with lights I got in Key Largo-good memories.
The first couple to be shown in bed together on prime time TV were Fred and Wilma Flintstone.
Every day more money is printed for Monopoly than the US Treasury.
Men can read smaller print than women can; women can hear better.
Coca-Cola was originally green.
It is impossible to lick your elbow.
The state with the highest percentage of people who walk to work: Alaska
The percentage of Africa that is wilderness: 28% The percentage of North America that is wilderness: 38%
The cost of raising a medium-size dog to the age of eleven: $6,400
The average number of people airborne over the US any given hour: 61,000
Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair.
The world's youngest parents were 8 and 9 and lived in China in 1910.
The youngest pope was 11 years old.
The first novel ever written on a typewriter: Tom Sawyer.
Those San Francisco Cable cars are the only mobile National Monuments.
Each king in a deck of playing cards represents a great king from history: Spades - King David Hearts - Charlemagne, Clubs - Alexander, the Great Diamonds - Julius Caesar
111,111,111 x 111,111,111 = 12,345,678,987,654,321...Look closely!
If a statue in the park of a person on a horse has both front legs in the air, the person died in battle. If the horse has one front leg in the air the person died as a result of wounds received in battle. If the horse has all four legs on the ground, the person died of natural causes.
"I am." is the shortest complete sentence in the English language.
Hershey's Kisses are called that because the machine that makes them looks like it's kissing the conveyor belt.
Q. Half of all Americans live within 50 miles of what? Their birthplace
Q. Most boat owners name their boats. What is the most popular boat name requested? Obsession
Q. If you were to spell out numbers, how far would you have to go until you would find the letter "A"? One thousand
Q. What do bulletproof vests, fire escapes, windshield wipers, and laser printers all have in common? All invented by women.
Q. What is the only food that doesn't spoil? . Honey
Q. There are more collect calls on this day than any other day of the year? Father's Day
Q. What trivia fact about Mel Blanc (voice of Bugs Bunny) is the most ironic? He was allergic to carrots.
Q. What is an activity performed by 40% of all people at a party? Snoop in your medicine cabinet.
In Shakespeare's time, mattresses were secured on bed frames by ropes. When you pulled on the ropes the mattress tightened, making the bed firmer to sleep on. Hence the phrase "goodnight, sleep tight."
It was the accepted practice in Babylon 4,000 years ago that for a month after the wedding, the bride's father would supply his son-in-law with all the mead he could drink. Mead is a honey beer and because their calendar was lunar based, this period was called the honey month we know today as the honeymoon.
In English pubs, ale is ordered by pints and quarts. So in old England, when customers got unruly, the bartender would yell at them mind their own pints and quarts and settle down. It's where we get the phrase "mind your P's and Q's"
Many years ago in England, pub frequenters had a whistle baked into the rim or handle of their ceramic cups. When they needed a refill, they used the whistle to get some service. "Wet your whistle" is the phrase inspired by this practice.
In Scotland, a new game was invented. It was entitled Gentlemen Only Ladies Forbidden.... and thus the word GOLF entered into the English language.
AND FINALLY
At least 75% of people who read this will try to lick their elbow.
I'm SO sorry that the last post was SO long, but this is what happens when you don't sleep! This one's shorter & so stupid that it's cute...
Frog in a bank...
A frog goes into a bank and approaches the teller. He can see from the teller's nameplate that her name is 'Mrs Patricia Wack'. Trying not to think about spanking or to chuckle out loud [the poor girl obviously married into the name], he says:' Hello Mrs.Wack, I'd like to get a loan to buy a boat and go on a long holiday.' Patti looks at the frog in disbelief and asks how much he wants to borrow. The frog says $30,000.The teller asks his name. The frog frowns at this interrogation. He says that his name is Kermit Jagger and that it's OK, he knows the bank manager. Patti has some doubts about the name 'Kermit Jagger', but keen to give good customer service she politely explains that $30,000 is a substantial amount of money and that he will need to secure some collateral against the loan. She asks if he has anything he can use as collateral. The frog says, 'Yes,I have this,' and produces a tiny pink porcelain elephant, about half an inch tall. Bright pink and perfectly formed. Very confused, Patti decides to talk to her boss,and she explains to the frog that she'll have to consult with the manager and disappears into a back office. She finds the manager and says: You're not going to believe this but there's a frog out there who claims to be called Kermit Jagger, saying that he knows you, and that he wants to borrow $30,000. And he wants to use this as collateral.' She holds up the tiny pink elephant saying. 'I mean, its ridiculous: what on earth is going on? So the bank manager holds up the pink elephant and replies..............(are you ready???) Hang on to something..... It's a knick knack, Patti Wack. Give the frog a loan. His old man's a Rolling Stone.
Going to bed now...Hope it made you smile! Peach : )
Nice the story of Mike Jagger's son! Georgia, I didn't try to kiss my elbow because I knew you can't do it. Tried so many times when I was a child. I can roll my tongue, though! The other things were very interesting. Are you sure that 6400 dollars are enough to raise a dog? If he does not hurt himself! I paid 1200 euros when my dog was hit by a car last year! (between operation, and bandages and healing ointments....) One thing is sure, If I hadn't taken any animal, I could have bought a house by now! (20 years, do some math!!!!)
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Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
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I like the saying: fall in a ditch and come up rich. cool.
Make yourself a cake!
I love mac and cheese and Ice Cream.
Where do you live? Are we close?
hang a couple balls (silver) on something and call it a day!
lovbob
Where's Jen?
lovbob
my bro says is there anything he can do when he gets hom for his 24 hours after he has been gone for 3 months and then proceeds to tell us about taking people he dont even really know to disney land and it is gona cost 10000 dollars and mom needs a shower
dammit
let me stop are i can see to type
It isn't so bad ...
I hope there will be lots of activity on the thread come Christmas Eve & Day.
Will be a bright spot for us.
I don't speak to my sisters-they were never around to even visit Mom but now tell everyone that I didn't care for her right--they didn't even go to the funeral--screw them.
Cry it out and keep venting. vent vent vent. it will save your life!
I am forever amazed about how crazy the siblings are and I feel for you caregivers so much and wish I had 10000 to pop you into a spa with all kinds of massages and strawberries.
Your brother is a class A jerk.
But of course you know that.
lovbob
I gotta stop. I can feel the resentment growing and it's not a good thing.
i live in mississippi 40 mil north of louisiana which is where i am from
any way
it ticks me of that then he has the nerve to ask if he gets a house and pays for tickets and food can we meaning moma pay for gas and lodging for her and i to get ther which is 1000 we dont have
and as soon as march
and not can i stay with mom or her is of course you all know what i mean
Back in a few.
True! Rip! Nance! Mizx! we'll be here on Christmas Eve and Christmas! We'll figure out how to type O Holy Night in Unison.
lovbob
Thank you, It is very nice that when one feels distressed, in the following two minutes many people come to help him and make him (her) feel better.
The cousins meeting is in Rome, at my brother's house; the problem is that if I don't go, my mother will not go either, and I know she loves family meetings. Shall I be selfish and think of myself? Shall I be generous and I bring her there? I could stay for two hours in apnea.
Christina, as we are no hamsters and no diggers, I see people like us as birds that fly, sometimes high, sometimes low. Very often, in order to see the landscape, we become absent minded and crash against something! (other birds, planes, advertising panels) Hard life!
Truecolors, if you like Christmas, fight for your Christmas! Make a tree, put some lights on, cook something good. Just for you and mom, it's okay. I like mac-cheese, but you could make a luxurious cake without worrying about calories. Even if you have to sing alone "I wish you a Merry Christmas", do it! Please.
Marissa... oh my God. Bobbie, do you think she has already made her decision?
rossella , maybe u can drop ur mom off there and u tell them for cmas u want a break and poof off you go ?
im not going anywhere , im staying home if they want to see dad they know where he is , of course i welcome them and keeping peace . im not going any where ,,,
you could tell them to have it at your house :-) there thats an ideal ,
am worried about marrissa , prayed for her too . when u snap u snap big time and theres nothing anybody can do , depressions does people very fraggial moments of thier life .
austin - you ok ?? i sure hope so , ask ur son for a snowblower for cmas ,
xoxox
They are not here living with the shit I do, I have learned to take what is said to me by others with a grain of salt, a teaspoon of sugar a cup of kindness stir well bake at 350 and toss out the window...
I DO what is needed I DON'T have to like it! And as for the argument "They DID for us when we were small.." Guess what, YOU HAVE NO FIN-G IDEA WHAT THEY MAY OR MAY NOT HAVE DONE FOR US WHEN WE WERE CHILDREN!" You are ASS-uming an awful lot to assume all of us had kind, selfless loving parents and grandparents (many here did) who would do anything for us and we now own them our life's blood in payment. Don't even half think it! For me I must edge the side of this argument, as I am one of the few genuinely bitter, angry post abuse care givers so my ire is earned, I will stick my foot in it and state what I FEEL about those here caring for loved ones, parents who were kind, loving guides fro them in their most vulnerable years, helping hands and watching affectionate family members...That they are dealing with tremendously complex burdens of not only the day to day caring for a beloved parent/spouse/mate/grandparent but watching as a once strong, competent, intelligent, complex individual they have known throughout their lives as an authority and friend is becoming a weak, failing, sore, sometimes snappish, recalcitrant and often messy child-adult. The cared for child, has become the care giving child as an adult. There is love and fear anger and hope memories of a happier time and a more cognizant parent now reduced to near toddler stage of old age, all mixed up with the ongoing, often thank less (if they could they would) grind of increasing hygienic needs and resistance to them by the loved one as well as financial/business tasks, that the parent may or may not have ever shared any information on with them, the social aspects of looking after all there Dr appointments and errands on top of their own life needs and activities pared down to only the absolutely necessary ones... When you were a child you adapted and were merged into your parents life, now as an adult your life is put on hold as they slowly lose body, mind, social skills etc....Every day seems to bring more failings and loss of abilities for the parent and a greater burden, yes burden for the care giver. It does NOT mean they love them less because they are tired, or afraid or angry or even resentful of this load dropped on them by choice, necessity, society, lack of funds. Family should take care of family, I have had spewed at me by cab drivers...and so they should, and thanks to modern medicine we now see more and more folks living to older and older (and more care needing ages) for longer and longer. What was once an old granny helping out in the kitchen, is now a huge population of elders with greater physical, financial, emotional, medical, needs...and more often than not it will fall on the shoulders of just ONE person in a family group. They are, if anything braver, and more kind, and more REAL than the family/siblings/friends who say they will help but disappear (till it is time to share out the funds) or say they "Just can't stand to see so and so like that..." Or are just too busy.... These shamed caregivers are more responsible than the social services that come and go. More competent even at times than the physician legally charged with the care of our loved ones health and well being.
They have taken on tasks that yes, many of our parents/grandparents took on for them as children. The children THEY CHOOSE TO HAVE, then there care WAS their responsibility, when they were small, mindful, dependent, and growing in abilities and strengths daily. A two year old, will be two for about 16 months, an elderly person can settle into a devolved-developmental stage for a decade or more. A child is also smaller and apt at times to do as told, a parent has been the authority. If you think it is a chore to tell a five year old to sit down and eat their, supper try telling it to an angry, short fused, snappish older person who is well, still and adult Thank You very much! And one who "Used to wipe yer back side!" If they did so.
"SHAME on us"? What the hell for? For being tired and worn out? For not liking to have feces on the walls and our hands and the floors...Yeah, clean it up! We do, day after day...with no end in sight. A relatively healthy older person? Who knows. This could go on for fifteen years. Your toddler would be looking at college applications by then, and you would be well ready for it, wouldn't you...? There is no graduation day here. There is the possible coming of a level of infirmity that brings a need for placing the loved one in a nursing home, something many caregivers avoid like plague. Ashamed to admit they need this assistance or saddened at the thought of abandoning a loved parent...How can I just abandon my mom or dad? The feeling of just dumping them twisting the gut like sickness...And then there is death...The inevitable and final Good-Bye many of us are facing day by day moment by moment or year to year.All the mess of the release of the strain and worry and the genuine grief of the loss of Mom or Dad finally and did I do ENOUGH and should I feel ashamed to feel relief as well as grief? The fact of the connection that it is ones parents one is looking after, doesn't diminish the pain and fear and burden of the caring tasks at time. There is a great deal of stress and strain and weariness in life, it isn't shameful to note it, even if it comes along with the daily care given to a family member. Are only nurses allowed to be tired and worn from the constant monitoring of needy patients, are only personal secretaries allowed to feel used and over run with schedules and the unexpected sudden things that come up and throw whole days worth of errands off...are only janitors allowed to be grossed out by a bathroom covered in filth...Just because it's family, doesn't make it easy, if anything it makes it harder, because it isn't just a job, it isn't "only a pay check" (if there IS one), it is a very hard, messy, draining, complex, chore filled part of life we chose in deciding to look after a loved one. Most of us didn't have a clue what we were getting in to. Now, we are tired, frustrated, worn out, hopeful, scared, still loving, "grossed out" at times yes...and NOT ASHAMED!
I am doing Ok, talked to miz bad weather there, but think she is OK.
Listening to The Beatles on Youtube here...
Did I tell you my Mom has tendered her resignation at work. My broken ankle just put the whole situation into relief and that I NEED SOME and he is HER FATHER...and HE should be paying for more around here...If he was in a nursing home he would be paying $4,000 a month, he still puts bank away here!
One more lil thing, I think will stick to "Bite Me" solo Name attached seems too personal, it is a general term, and will apply to so many, myself included.
:"She loved you yeah yeah yeah...":
man you rock.
bite me blow me back me up. doo dah doo dah.
yup. there are two ways to go:
Love
Fear
Fear based behavior results in anger.
Everything is so serious around us. There could be a matricide occurring sometime around the world from us.
it is so overwhelming, all of the mean people and the mean relatives. i am so thankful that I don't have any bros or sis and I feel so bad for all of you who are in the middle of a family but still so alone. absolutely unjust.
The River where I am docked is calm for the first time in 2 weeks. the boat is not moving and the water is like glass. No wind and the lights are gorgeous reflected in the water.
Peaceful and I wish that you all were here with me.
Of course then it wouldn't be peaceful! We would be having a grand old time and singing and indulging in adult beverages.
Wait.... that's still peaceful!
Miz! sound like you guys have a plan! good stuff. love you a lot and when you coming?
love all you guys.
True! Maxine! whassup?
lovbob
so is ur mom home everyday now ?
my hubsand is home everyday now till jan 3rd ,
caught him doing dishes , :-)
suppose to get real nasty out again tmr or thurs ,
im so ready for sprng ,
bobbie i saw on the news about oranges down in fla , so sad .
that is so unusual for fla to be that cold , sure hope it warms up soon , maybe it ll snow in fla on christmas day , ho ho hooo .
need go ck on pa , he doesnt feel good today , lit whiney sleep alot too , i thought i saw a death look on his face . he dont feel good , i put flannel shirt over his t shirt to keep him warmer and tucked him in , you all have a good night , xoxox
love you love you can't wait to meet you and have coffee and laugh and do you like to fish?
lovbob
Signing off for now, hope you have a peaceful night.
whassup brother?
You know that you're doing the job! We know that you're doing the job!
I certainly don't want to f**k someone who doesn't get it. i would much rather f**k someone who DOES get it! Har har.
you don't have to be polite around us!
Oh I see you already know that.....
We love ya pal and you rock out with your c*** out.
Ok, I'm afraid that I'm going to break my asterisk button.
lovbob
I realized that we would be in the middle of nowhere and the physicality of moving her would break my back in half and I was afraid of what may happen and I wouldn't be able to take care of her or get her in or out of the thing.
I'm still sad that she never got to be on the boat but wanted me to be on the boat.
I have never seen such courage in anyone except my father.
One day I'll tell part of his story. Guest of the Nazis for a year.
He was 18.
crying,
lovbob
Missed you both.
You be careful out there Maxine!
The first couple to be shown in bed together on prime time TV were Fred and Wilma Flintstone.
Every day more money is printed for Monopoly than the US Treasury.
Men can read smaller print than women can;
women can hear better.
Coca-Cola was originally green.
It is impossible to lick your elbow.
The state with the highest percentage of people who walk to work: Alaska
The percentage of Africa that is wilderness: 28%
The percentage of North America that is wilderness: 38%
The cost of raising a medium-size dog to the age of eleven: $6,400
The average number of people airborne over the US any given hour: 61,000
Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair.
The world's youngest parents were 8 and 9 and lived in China in 1910.
The youngest pope was 11 years old.
The first novel ever written on a typewriter: Tom Sawyer.
Those San Francisco Cable cars are the only mobile National Monuments.
Each king in a deck of playing cards represents a great king from history:
Spades - King David
Hearts - Charlemagne,
Clubs - Alexander, the Great
Diamonds - Julius Caesar
111,111,111 x 111,111,111 =
12,345,678,987,654,321...Look closely!
If a statue in the park of a person on a horse has both front legs in the air, the person died in battle. If the horse has one front leg in the air the person died as a result of wounds
received in battle. If the horse has all four legs on the ground, the person died of natural causes.
"I am." is the shortest complete sentence in the English language.
Hershey's Kisses are called that because the machine that makes them looks like it's kissing the conveyor belt.
Q. Half of all Americans live within 50 miles of what?
Their birthplace
Q. Most boat owners name their boats. What is the most popular boat name requested?
Obsession
Q. If you were to spell out numbers, how far would you have to go until you would find the letter "A"?
One thousand
Q. What do bulletproof vests, fire escapes, windshield wipers, and laser printers all have in common?
All invented by women.
Q. What is the only food that doesn't spoil? .
Honey
Q. There are more collect calls on this day than any other day of the year?
Father's Day
Q. What trivia fact about Mel Blanc (voice of Bugs Bunny) is the most ironic?
He was allergic to carrots.
Q. What is an activity performed by 40% of all people at a party?
Snoop in your medicine cabinet.
In Shakespeare's time, mattresses were secured on
bed frames by ropes. When you pulled on the ropes the mattress tightened, making the bed firmer to sleep on.
Hence the phrase "goodnight, sleep tight."
It was the accepted practice in Babylon 4,000 years ago that for a month after the wedding, the bride's father would
supply his son-in-law with all the mead he could drink. Mead is a honey beer and because their calendar was lunar based, this period was called the honey month we know today as the honeymoon.
In English pubs, ale is ordered by pints and quarts. So in old England, when customers got unruly, the bartender would
yell at them mind their own pints and quarts and settle down. It's where we get the phrase "mind your P's and Q's"
Many years ago in England, pub frequenters had a whistle baked into the rim or handle of their ceramic cups. When they
needed a refill, they used the whistle to get some service.
"Wet your whistle" is the phrase inspired by this practice.
In Scotland, a new game was invented. It was
entitled Gentlemen Only Ladies Forbidden....
and thus the word GOLF entered into the English language.
AND FINALLY
At least 75% of people who read this will try to lick their elbow.
Great big hugs to you!
Peach
Frog in a bank...
A frog goes into a bank and approaches the teller. He can see
from the teller's nameplate that her name is 'Mrs Patricia Wack'. Trying not to think about spanking or to chuckle out loud [the poor girl obviously married into the name], he says:' Hello Mrs.Wack, I'd like to get a loan to buy a boat and go on a long holiday.'
Patti looks at the frog in disbelief and asks how much he wants
to borrow. The frog says $30,000.The teller asks his name. The frog frowns at this interrogation. He says that his name is Kermit Jagger and that it's OK, he knows the bank manager. Patti has some doubts about the name 'Kermit Jagger', but keen to give good customer service she politely explains that $30,000 is a substantial amount of money and that he will need to secure some collateral against the loan. She asks if he has anything he can use as collateral.
The frog says, 'Yes,I have this,' and produces a tiny pink porcelain elephant, about half an inch tall. Bright pink and perfectly formed.
Very confused, Patti decides to talk to her boss,and she explains to the frog that she'll have to consult with the manager and disappears into a back office. She finds the manager and says: You're not going to believe this but there's a frog out there who claims to be called Kermit Jagger, saying that he knows you, and that he wants to borrow $30,000. And he wants to use this as collateral.'
She holds up the tiny pink elephant saying. 'I mean, its ridiculous: what on earth is going on? So the bank manager holds up the pink elephant and replies..............(are you ready???) Hang on to something.....
It's a knick knack, Patti Wack. Give the frog a loan.
His old man's a Rolling Stone.
Going to bed now...Hope it made you smile!
Peach : )
Georgia, I didn't try to kiss my elbow because I knew you can't do it. Tried so many times when I was a child.
I can roll my tongue, though!
The other things were very interesting. Are you sure that 6400 dollars are enough to raise a dog? If he does not hurt himself! I paid 1200 euros when my dog was hit by a car last year! (between operation, and bandages and healing ointments....)
One thing is sure, If I hadn't taken any animal, I could have bought a house by now! (20 years, do some math!!!!)