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how do u all think your mothers would feel if they knew that you were online telling all the things they do that u think is so gross.I took care of my mother ,my twin sister and I took a month at a time. everyone in our families(our children and husbands)were very patient with her. We tried to see the humor in the things.)We showed her love and kindness , which I'm sure u do. Sure, we got tired but I didn't want to see her go , when it was her time. In whatever state she was in, she was a blessing from God.You will have plenty of time to enjoy the rest of your life after she is gone. Just pray that u don't have the same fate as hers. If so, I hope you have children that are understanding and will do the same for u.
When Miz was beside her mother's beside as was Mom slipping away, all of us were tripping all over ourselves supporting her - wracking our brains on how to help! ...some girl named Amber Jane comes on with a similar arrogant lecture like Magnoliatwin's.
It is always better to research, then think, and know the facts before one speaks an opinion. This is not a good place to do anything half-assed, OK? Whoo Hooo!!! Yeah, Bite ALL of Us!
WHEW! I've been reading for almost 2 hours!!! You guys are SO funny! I needed to laugh! Thanks! It's been a LONG day!
I didn't make notes this time, either, so I may forget someone...I'm sorry! It's not intentional!
Bobbie, LOVED hearing from you today! Thank you SO much for caring enough to check on me! You really impressed Larry! BOAT time...BO-BO-BO-BOAT time!!! OH, I told Larry about your choices for a profession & he wants to know how many Fruit Loops you've blasted if you're a 'cereal' killer! Well, at least HE thought it was funny! I'm looking up info on our restaurant that we talked about, too! Can't wait...I'm hungry now! And try to stay outta trouble tomorrow night! : ) If ya do get toasted & get into trouble sing out & we'll come bust ya outta there! Give your little 'electric drill' a hug for me, ok? And tell her easy on the catnip tomorrow night, too!
Sweet miz, I'm thinking about you. Give Bobbie Bear a big hug & know that we're all hugging you back!
Thinking about Angie today! Heart hurting for her, too!
Jam, my husband, Larry, would tell you to 'be the bigger person',go to the service & 'play nice'. I, on the other hand, would tend to agree with you that you've already said goodbye to her & helped her to pass with dignity, so don't go. Hey, here's a thought...Go & wear a 'Bite Me' t-shirt! (Cheesy grin!) OH, I'm working on designs for a 'Bite Me' tee. Do we want it to actually say Bite Me or do we want it to say OBMAJ & then we can explain it?!?! Suggestions??
ssk, not telling ya to do this, just relaying a true story from the past...My Daddy couldn't 'go' for a few days & was very uncomfortable, but like most men, he wouldn't take anything to make the situation better. The solution: My Momma fixed some Jello chocolate pudding for dessert that night...the catch was that she melted Ex-Lax & put it in Daddy's! Next day problem solved & he didn't know the difference...THEN! lol My Momma made a special mention to me that 'that' one was Daddy's & that it was special for him, & if I didn't get them mixed up I could have two desserts! I didn't get them mixed up while passing out the desserts that night! Momma eventually told Daddy after the fact what she'd done & he'd always ask if there was anything funny in the chocolate pudding from then on out. It's still a family joke! OH...it works good in brownies, too! LOL
Pirate, I'm sorry to hear about your cousin! I'm glad that his Mom is thankful to you for helping her! I'm sorry, too, that you're Mom is still giving you a hard time! Have missed you!
tenn, I'm so sorry that you've been so sick & I'm glad that you're starting to feel some better! Take it easy & don't over do it! I know you've had a good caregiver there looking after you! Lil' Tenny, you go, girl!
Jam, I think it's hillarious that you went to renew your permit today! Better watch out...Jammie's toting & packing heat!!! LOL (Larry's a gun smith! VERY talented once, but now very difficult with the Parkinson's.)
Linda, congratulations on BOAT time! Wish you could take off go now! You could swing by & pick me up & we'd both jump onboard...set a wave in motion for sure! lol
Rip the Stitch, I'm sorry that I missed you today! We didn't get back from the funeral until after 6. Maybe later tonight on FaceBoat?!?! Anybody else wanna join the party?? Deef?
j, PLEASE be careful out in your bootie! I'd hate for you to fall again! I tell ya what, I'm sore in places that I'd clean forgot about! I think my wrist is ok. Just sore. It was really fun drying my hair this morning...eating...driving...shaving Larry...! Oh, the things we take for granted!
Deef, pretty lamp! Special piece! Special card! You got class...real class!!! How much do I owe you?
Christina, you're so funny! Keep it coming! Thanks for the hug & the prayers!
Austin, what words of wisdom!
Kimmie & dd, WELCOME!!! We're a pretty tight knit group of caregivers that stick up for each other, encourage each other & try to find humor daily. Glad you're here!
Bubba T (Ted), Kuli, Nance, Diane, Castoff, kelleybean, Rossella & everybody else, HUGS to you guys!
We went to Larry's nephew's funeral today. Very sweet & dignified! Larry was SO handsome all dressed up! Made me think, so I checked with Olan Mills Photography & we're gonna go tomorrow to have our picture taken & we're taking Shelbie with us so she'll be in the photo, too. I wanna take Gracie, too, but I already know that she'd have no part of it! Olan Mills is having a GREAT special right now. $10 for a good sized package! I've been asking for this for the last 3 Christmas'! "Good things come to he who waits!"
Think I'm gonna get off of here for a little while & hummm...did I hear someone mention chocolate? Brownies anyone?? No 'Ex'-tra added ingredients...I promise! LOL
hey yall i am not even gona shorten things OH MY GOD you guys want to get a good laugh just dont read theses threads for a day and go about your business and then just skim thru them lots of them as lonely and stressed as we are if you have ever watched people and just laughed at them dont read the people read the words and dont look at the faces just skimming the thread i was just picturing all the things it is like watching a vaudville act i am not making fun really moma and i was talkin about grandma thia morning and her dementia and alz moma was crying and laughing at the same time and we both thanking god that he gave us the time we had together and that me caring for moma now full time that at this time it is only physical and not mental thank god we have our moments and we fight i am not a home body and i cant go out MUCH without sombody her for moma but with laughter come peace and understanding THE NEW YEAR IS FAST APPROCHING luv truecolors
Hi Magnolia and welcome to the Grossed Out Thread. when did your mom pass away? Mine died in May this year. We've had a lot of losses here on the boat. sux doesn't it? we work really hard here to support the caregiver who is ready to implode. There is NO family or help and tremendous stresses with the great majority of the people who post here and we have become a tight little family.
Anyhoo, read some of the thread, start at the beginning and read about 100 or so posts and then hit 'recent' and read backwards for a bit. check out some of the profiles and understand what we're up to and maybe you won't be so grossed out and you may feel comfortable posting with us.
There are some amazing caregivers here and ones whos moms just died, Jam, yesterday am, Miz, her mom died a month ago today.
My mom knew what was gross. My mom had comic timing that would put you on the floor. Talk about gross: I'm like, 7. One time she's stirring some stuff in a big frying pan and I cruise up and ask what's cooking. Mom says: Cat's eyes fried in snot.
That still kills me.
As for me? I have no children and no prospects of anyone caring for me. I gave up my job to care for my mom and therefore gave up any hope of a decent assisted living or Long Term Care for myself. No benefits, no insurance, no pension.
Linda,I'm computer stupid,I have a friend that is addicted to facebook.I'm happy on the Grossed-Out for now.If I knew how to put a picture up on this sight, I would put something up,but do not know how.When was Ted going to Ashville?
OOOpps did another good person get on here accidentally...?
I can only say from my experience...A if it was my mother I would feel different as I love her and despise my pervert grandfather whom I Pray to God dies every-time I hear him...I have had plenty of life time with him really! but that I know due to the pain in my relationship with my mom there will be times I will be grossed out. It doesn't mean we don't CARE for these people we Care FOR,( cept in my case) the fact we are hear regaling one another with tales of hilarious gore and insane tid bits o funk, if we didn't care we'd be the selfish lazy, stupid, living in denia siblings and other relatives who "Can't bear to see so and so such and such" or "just don't have the time to give" WE ARE HERE, and this is hard work and what ever we do to let off steam that is not A. hurting the person we steam about or B. Putting the actual care in jeopardy we have decided is either OK or strted a separate blog where it doesn't come up. I will grant you I understand what you are saying, that it is hurtful in heart to say such things about people we love and care for and how dare we and they are helpless children and we should look after them and so forth...well we do. but we are not saints (martyrs maybe) saints , no and we spill it here so the meanness doesn't come out there.
And as for future pay back...well, we may well live long enough and need such care ourselves one day, that too will be hard for someone else, regardless of their feelings for us in life...
As for me, if I try to lick my dogs bloody feces off my finger I will hope to GOD that someone A: is disgusted and B: STOPS ME FROM DOING IT!!!!
gross j sombody really gross i told my kids when the oldest was about 12 and they wanted to know about going to work to help mom out the they needed to make sure to get a good education and get good jobs cause they were gona have to take care of me they needed to have a big house or at least a mother in law house out in the back 40 lol cause i was moving in no question they were gona have to take car of me cause their dady would not let me finish school or have friends or go to work so it was on them so now they are all grone and i am caring for my mom and they know if i cant i and moving in with my middle child and when my son gets out of boot camp and he get s settled or my mom is in hevan i am taging along i am making my rounds sombody better move over cause moma is coming i dont have retirment or anything like that and now i am just waiting on my disability and caring for moma lets hop my back holds out for at least until moma's last days
Miz, Jam - my thoughts and prayers are with you. Bobbie, maybe you never had kids but the family you have built here has become even stronger than blood. Bless you. I so hope you have a good year in the new year - you so deserve nothing but the best for all you have done for others! We all love and cherish your friendship, your humor, your love for all of us. Thank you for giving all of us the dream of the BOAT to hope for one day. It would be so, so wonderful if we could all meet on the boat one day to celebrate the lives of those we care or have cared for as well as the friendships we have built thanks to you. Love you and keeping all of you in my prayers tonite and always, Linda
I know how she feels, it would kill me to lose my mom I really would rather go first. I DO understand what she means, and I think I am the only one here who fits her ire truly. I do have contempt for my grandfather there is no love lost there so to speak...But I still do what is expected, no ones mentions the messes to him we just clean them up, what does it matter what I think. The "Do it with Love or don't do it at all" theme is ludicrous, understandable but unrealistic... Nothing would get done in the world is everything had to be done with love...but I know what she feels...
Magnoliatwin, I, too, thank God for my 85 year old Mom & KNOW that she's a blessing, although she can be a real 'stinker' at times! Pun intended!
What YOU have to understand is that YOU should have read the posts on this thread to get to know us a little to see that WE have a history...see where we're coming from, where we've been & where we hope to go? Have you even noticed that we're WELL over 7000 posts on here & see beyond your obvious blindness & arrogance that we ARE a compassionate group of very tired (some of our loved one have been in our care for close to 15 years), lonely, stressed, broke, but EXTREMELY caring group of individuals who gather here on a daily basis for companionship, encouragement, joy, insight, vent time, & yes, even help in staying out of the 'black hole' of depression, to be BETTER able to lovingly care for our loved ones!!! ***Have you read enough here know that Bobbie123, the wonderful lady that you're raking over the coals & chastising for being human, that her wonderful loved & cared for Mother passed away 7 months ago???*** Feeling a little, well, stupid, now?? You should!!!
If you had a good support team at home then GREAT, but unfortunately that's NOT the case for everyone! The 'family' that we thought & should have been able to depend on in times like we're experiencing have, in most cases produced uncaring, unyielding, sanctimonious, obnoctious, absent, 'deadbeat' siblings!
I believe that the same God that I thank for my Mom is the same God that has directed or guided this group of caregivers together to form a wonderful 'family'...ok, not a convientional family, but a family better than any 'blood' family that we have been graced with, none the less! We actually love each other like family & I, personally, like this family better than my 'blood' family! And respect??? You don't EVEN want to start that war!!!
People, like YOU, don't have a clue, but we'll be glad to take up a collection to help buy you one!
OH, one final thought...Don't 'DIS what you can KISS!!!
No No I am not owning the dog thing I READ that one...I was hoping it was an exaggeration...?
Grandpa just pissed my mom off here majorly!
She had to go out and shift some snow and warm the car and for the second day in a row he opened the door after fifty tries and yelled at her to come back inside...for the second night in a row and she is pissed...must go it is gonna be taken out on me now....
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I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
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I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
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APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
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APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
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If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
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This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
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You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
love,
miz
When Miz was beside her mother's beside as was Mom slipping away, all of us were tripping all over ourselves supporting her - wracking our brains on how to help!
...some girl named Amber Jane comes on with a similar arrogant lecture like Magnoliatwin's.
Next comment was:
Bite Me Amber Jane
I didn't make notes this time, either, so I may forget someone...I'm sorry! It's not intentional!
Bobbie, LOVED hearing from you today! Thank you SO much for caring enough to check on me! You really impressed Larry!
BOAT time...BO-BO-BO-BOAT time!!! OH, I told Larry about your choices for a profession & he wants to know how many Fruit Loops you've blasted if you're a 'cereal' killer! Well, at least HE thought it was funny! I'm looking up info on our restaurant that we talked about, too! Can't wait...I'm hungry now! And try to stay outta trouble tomorrow night! : ) If ya do get toasted & get into trouble sing out & we'll come bust ya outta there! Give your little 'electric drill' a hug for me, ok? And tell her easy on the catnip tomorrow night, too!
Sweet miz, I'm thinking about you. Give Bobbie Bear a big hug & know that we're all hugging you back!
Thinking about Angie today! Heart hurting for her, too!
Jam, my husband, Larry, would tell you to 'be the bigger person',go to the service & 'play nice'. I, on the other hand, would tend to agree with you that you've already said goodbye to her & helped her to pass with dignity, so don't go. Hey, here's a thought...Go & wear a 'Bite Me' t-shirt! (Cheesy grin!)
OH, I'm working on designs for a 'Bite Me' tee. Do we want it to actually say Bite Me or do we want it to say OBMAJ & then we can explain it?!?! Suggestions??
ssk, not telling ya to do this, just relaying a true story from the past...My Daddy couldn't 'go' for a few days & was very uncomfortable, but like most men, he wouldn't take anything to make the situation better. The solution: My Momma fixed some Jello chocolate pudding for dessert that night...the catch was that she melted Ex-Lax & put it in Daddy's! Next day problem solved & he didn't know the difference...THEN! lol My Momma made a special mention to me that 'that' one was Daddy's & that it was special for him, & if I didn't get them mixed up I could have two desserts! I didn't get them mixed up while passing out the desserts that night! Momma eventually told Daddy after the fact what she'd done & he'd always ask if there was anything funny in the chocolate pudding from then on out. It's still a family joke! OH...it works good in brownies, too! LOL
Pirate, I'm sorry to hear about your cousin! I'm glad that his Mom is thankful to you for helping her! I'm sorry, too, that you're Mom is still giving you a hard time! Have missed you!
tenn, I'm so sorry that you've been so sick & I'm glad that you're starting to feel some better! Take it easy & don't over do it! I know you've had a good caregiver there looking after you! Lil' Tenny, you go, girl!
Jam, I think it's hillarious that you went to renew your permit today! Better watch out...Jammie's toting & packing heat!!! LOL (Larry's a gun smith! VERY talented once, but now very difficult with the Parkinson's.)
Linda, congratulations on BOAT time! Wish you could take off go now! You could swing by & pick me up & we'd both jump onboard...set a wave in motion for sure! lol
Rip the Stitch, I'm sorry that I missed you today! We didn't get back from the funeral until after 6. Maybe later tonight on FaceBoat?!?! Anybody else wanna join the party?? Deef?
j, PLEASE be careful out in your bootie! I'd hate for you to fall again! I tell ya what, I'm sore in places that I'd clean forgot about! I think my wrist is ok. Just sore. It was really fun drying my hair this morning...eating...driving...shaving Larry...! Oh, the things we take for granted!
Deef, pretty lamp! Special piece! Special card! You got class...real class!!!
How much do I owe you?
Christina, you're so funny! Keep it coming! Thanks for the hug & the prayers!
Austin, what words of wisdom!
Kimmie & dd, WELCOME!!! We're a pretty tight knit group of caregivers that stick up for each other, encourage each other & try to find humor daily. Glad you're here!
Bubba T (Ted), Kuli, Nance, Diane, Castoff, kelleybean, Rossella & everybody else, HUGS to you guys!
We went to Larry's nephew's funeral today. Very sweet & dignified! Larry was SO handsome all dressed up! Made me think, so I checked with Olan Mills Photography & we're gonna go tomorrow to have our picture taken & we're taking Shelbie with us so she'll be in the photo, too. I wanna take Gracie, too, but I already know that she'd have no part of it! Olan Mills is having a GREAT special right now. $10 for a good sized package! I've been asking for this for the last 3 Christmas'! "Good things come to he who waits!"
Think I'm gonna get off of here for a little while & hummm...did I hear someone mention chocolate? Brownies anyone?? No 'Ex'-tra added ingredients...I promise! LOL
Love & BIG hugs to y'all...
Peach
OH MY GOD
you guys want to get a good laugh
just dont read theses threads for a day and go about your business and then just
skim thru them
lots of them
as lonely and stressed as we are if you have ever watched people and just laughed at them
dont read the people read the words and dont look at the faces
just skimming the thread i was just picturing all the things
it is like watching a vaudville act
i am not making fun
really
moma and i was talkin about grandma thia morning and her dementia and alz
moma was crying and laughing at the same time
and we both thanking god that he gave us the time we had together
and that me caring for moma now full time that at this time it is only physical and not mental thank god
we have our moments and we fight
i am not a home body and i cant go out MUCH without sombody her for moma
but with laughter come peace and understanding
THE NEW YEAR IS FAST APPROCHING
luv truecolors
Love ALL you guys, uh huh
Hugs, christina
when did your mom pass away?
Mine died in May this year.
We've had a lot of losses here on the boat.
sux doesn't it?
we work really hard here to support the caregiver who is ready to implode. There is NO family or help and tremendous stresses with the great majority of the people who post here and we have become a tight little family.
Anyhoo, read some of the thread, start at the beginning and read about 100 or so posts and then hit 'recent' and read backwards for a bit.
check out some of the profiles and understand what we're up to and maybe you won't be so grossed out and you may feel comfortable posting with us.
There are some amazing caregivers here and ones whos moms just died, Jam, yesterday am, Miz, her mom died a month ago today.
My mom knew what was gross. My mom had comic timing that would put you on the floor.
Talk about gross:
I'm like, 7. One time she's stirring some stuff in a big frying pan and I cruise up and ask what's cooking.
Mom says:
Cat's eyes fried in snot.
That still kills me.
As for me? I have no children and no prospects of anyone caring for me.
I gave up my job to care for my mom and therefore gave up any hope of a decent assisted living or Long Term Care for myself. No benefits, no insurance, no pension.
You like boats?
lovbob
I can only say from my experience...A if it was my mother I would feel different as I love her and despise my pervert grandfather whom I Pray to God dies every-time I hear him...I have had plenty of life time with him really! but that I know due to the pain in my relationship with my mom there will be times I will be grossed out.
It doesn't mean we don't CARE for these people we Care FOR,( cept in my case) the fact we are hear regaling one another with tales of hilarious gore and insane tid bits o funk, if we didn't care we'd be the selfish lazy, stupid, living in denia siblings and other relatives who "Can't bear to see so and so such and such" or "just don't have the time to give" WE ARE HERE, and this is hard work and what ever we do to let off steam that is not A. hurting the person we steam about or B. Putting the actual care in jeopardy we have decided is either OK or strted a separate blog where it doesn't come up.
I will grant you I understand what you are saying, that it is hurtful in heart to say such things about people we love and care for and how dare we and they are helpless children and we should look after them and so forth...well we do. but we are not saints (martyrs maybe) saints , no and we spill it here so the meanness doesn't come out there.
And as for future pay back...well, we may well live long enough and need such care ourselves one day, that too will be hard for someone else, regardless of their feelings for us in life...
As for me, if I try to lick my dogs bloody feces off my finger I will hope to GOD that someone A: is disgusted and B: STOPS ME FROM DOING IT!!!!
Happy New Year all.....
i told my kids when the oldest was about 12 and they wanted to know about going to work to help mom out the they needed to make sure to get a good education and get good jobs cause they were gona have to take care of me they needed to have a big house or at least a mother in law house out in the back 40 lol cause i was moving in
no question they were gona have to take car of me cause their dady would not let me finish school or have friends or go to work so it was on them so now
they are all grone and i am caring for my mom
and they know if i cant i and moving in with my middle child
and when my son gets out of boot camp and he get s settled or my mom is in hevan
i am taging along
i am making my rounds
sombody better move over cause moma is coming
i dont have retirment or anything like that and now i am just waiting on my disability and caring for moma
lets hop my back holds out for at least until moma's last days
Magnoliatwin, I, too, thank God for my 85 year old Mom & KNOW that she's a blessing, although she can be a real 'stinker' at times! Pun intended!
What YOU have to understand is that YOU should have read the posts on this thread to get to know us a little to see that WE have a history...see where we're coming from, where we've been & where we hope to go? Have you even noticed that we're WELL over 7000 posts on here & see beyond your obvious blindness & arrogance that we ARE a compassionate group of very tired (some of our loved one have been in our care for close to 15 years), lonely, stressed, broke, but EXTREMELY caring group of individuals who gather here on a daily basis for companionship, encouragement, joy, insight, vent time, & yes, even help in staying out of the 'black hole' of depression, to be BETTER able to lovingly care for our loved ones!!! ***Have you read enough here know that Bobbie123, the wonderful lady that you're raking over the coals & chastising for being human, that her wonderful loved & cared for Mother passed away 7 months ago???*** Feeling a little, well, stupid, now?? You should!!!
If you had a good support team at home then GREAT, but unfortunately that's NOT the case for everyone! The 'family' that we thought & should have been able to depend on in times like we're experiencing have, in most cases produced uncaring, unyielding, sanctimonious, obnoctious, absent, 'deadbeat' siblings!
I believe that the same God that I thank for my Mom is the same God that has directed or guided this group of caregivers together to form a wonderful 'family'...ok, not a convientional family, but a family better than any 'blood' family that we have been graced with, none the less! We actually love each other like family & I, personally, like this family better than my 'blood' family! And respect??? You don't EVEN want to start that war!!!
People, like YOU, don't have a clue, but we'll be glad to take up a collection to help buy you one!
OH, one final thought...Don't 'DIS what you can KISS!!!
Please read Magnoliatwin's profile.
lovbob
Grandpa just pissed my mom off here majorly!
She had to go out and shift some snow and warm the car and for the second day in a row he opened the door after fifty tries and yelled at her to come back inside...for the second night in a row and she is pissed...must go it is gonna be taken out on me now....