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I'm having trouble getting good sleep too and with my meds that does not help at all.
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Wasn't Ted's respite voucher for the first of the year? Maybe he is just off somewhere getting some much needed rest.
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miz , glad to hear ur going to dr weds , hopefuly this doc will get u back on track .
feeling guilty is a no no my dear . u didnt do anything wrong , you did what you mom said . like i wanted to take dad to hospital last weds he beg me no , i thought oh if anything happens to him it be all my fault , told him i give him one more day , he knew he didnt needed to go and am glad he said no , save al the trouble and hassel .
our parents lived a good life and we do all we can for them . lord upstairs has a big book and knows whos going to be born and when its going to end . doesnt matter what we do to keep ou r parents alive , its all up to the man upstairs , shut the heart down and its his angels now ,
plz dont upset your angels , youre makin her feel sad begin down in the dump . its not healthy .
in other hand i have no room to talk , cuz i prob end up feeling the way youre feeling , my dad is my best friend in the whole world . he is still here with me , theres time i shake my head thinkin why is he alive ? well man upstairs has it all planned out and its not time for him to go .
i grief for a long time for my mom but i put a smile on my face cuz i had 3 young kids roamin around me and a husband that is dying to have his old linda back . i bounce back in no time but inside i cry and miss my mom . i know shes arund me when i needed her , i can feel it .
miz , i know ur hubby wants his old patty back . cheer up my friend . xoxox
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Jam, I don't know. You could be right. I hope you are.
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Linda, I sent you a message on Facebook.
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jam i think he used it up while back . how many did they give him a vouchers . thought its only one ?
ah well i hope he s a ok .
miz im trying to send u messages too on fb , sayin theres pblm can not send , try again . so ill try once this comptuer straightens up . xoxo
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Okay, Linda. :)
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PatTheHat, that was an awesome post you made on "President Obama's proposal for caregivers...." Truly a masterpiece.
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Awesome is right! Thanks for the heads up Miz!
Patrick with a T ~
Welcome again!
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Aww, thank you ever so much.
Ya know, I always did think Moby Dick was a wee tad pretentioushmael...oh my word, yeah I know, that ones a stretch even for me..yes by all means, the groaning may begin :-)
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Miz do not feel bad you did everything right -listen to Linda-if anyone should feel guilty it is me -I stayed away from the nursing home when the husband irritated me and many times left in a huff the last couple of years before I would sit and cry over how he treated me and I do not feel guilty-I know in my heart I did everything possible to help him so please my dear do not be hard on yourself-your emotions will be all over the place for a while-it takes time to recover from caregiving-you will have good days followed by many bad days.
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Welp, 3 councilmen came up to me trying to calm me this weekend.One offered to buy the house I'm threatning to bull-doze.City threatens to put lean on house,council offers to buy-seems a little conflicting.Fortunally,I know the set of rules that they play by-so its fun.Dude says mayor has let power go to his head-his poor little demented head.Squash the bad little bug.I think most of the bets are placed on me in this dog fight.Bankers are right up there with lawyers aren't they.People are getting so concerned I'm about to bulldoze a piece of history.plez don't do anything radical they begged-I CAN FEEL MY DAD SMILING AT ME FROM HEAVEN(THATS MY GIRL)Apples don't fall far from tree.Money and power has never mattered to me-Kindness and a good deeds is the true wealth of a town.Running up a Rebel battle flag in the middle of town tomorrow-just to let everyone know where the battleground is,THE guys are going to love that...
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Austin, thank you so much. I'm so very glad I have all of you on this thread to understand what I have gone through and for some what I am now going through. When you feel totally responsible for a person it is so hard not to blame yourself when things go wrong. I don't know how doctors do it. The ones that truly care I mean. It's beyond me. I so hope I can be of help on this thread with what I have learned through this experience. Love you lots.

miz
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Hey everyone hope all are well. Glad you know what it was Linda and it is on its way out...

Miz don't beat your self up, let your self feel the feelings and remember they will pass, come back and pass again. It is very early yet and it was a great loss. We are all here for you.

Transferred my plant to Southern facing window downstairs....!

Checking out job apps and req on line...
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tennessee, you go girl!!
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Miz.-I see you are still feeling bad-I haven't said much because I don't know what to say.J. is right the feelings are normal and you just have to ride the waves until they pass-don't mean they are justified though.You know you did everything right-we know you did-God knows you did-when you really love someone its just not possible to feel like you ever did enough.Even my dog Nola- I feel guilty she died in the yard and not on soft pillow-I was there with her but still not enough.I put a memorial thing on my back window of my car when JEFF died-helped a little-Bobbie named her boat after mom-I did small things in honor of my dad when he passed,hopefully going to do something big one day.Maybe you can think of a way to honor your mom still where you are at.It will give you focus and meaning-be it a flower bed with a plack in her honor or plant a tree she love and make a plack by it in her honor.I'm working on getting Cross put on tallest hill in honor of dad.Not sure what your mom liked,what are your ideas.
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Thank You, Tenny. I will give that some thought. Right now it's just painful to even think about her being gone. I know she is with Dad and God and is an angel among angels. I know she is happy. It's just hard.
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What would I do without you angels in my life. Seems like people in "real life" expect you to get over it quicker. At least some do. Life goes on and all that shit.
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When we care for a parent they become like our child. That's why the loss is so hard. They depend on us to take care of them, and then they die. They say death is a natural part of life, but with dementia, it's so much more involved. It sucks.
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It sure does suck, big time.
I'd give anything and everything I have, or will ever have, to just get five minutes back the way she was, even just a few years ago.
I was totally unprepared for what Mama has already lost, even though I pretty much knew what was coming.
Knowing this stuff intellectually, sure don't mean beans does it?
Especially with absolutely no time line, no idea of the when whatever happens, it's like day and POOF, where did that go, and what can I do to help find it.
She's not lost the core of who she is, or her bawdy & silly sense of humor, at least not yet, so in that I feel so extremely lucky.
And right now, those are the things I fear her losing the most.
Yep, sucks!
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Town Ordiance says you can't have events unless you have proper parking,towns small-but hundreds of cars descend upon us every july 4th for fireworks(biggest event in county)one phone call-no more parking-God what are they going to do-well not my worry,now most of the alderman are mad at mayor for provoking me.You know what they say people who live in glass houses should not throw stones.Well,I've had about all the fun I can stand today.Meeting with newspaper people tomorrow morning about harassment article-hope that goes well.Just remember if you give something your best shot-there's no such thing as failure.
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Well then I'm not sure about Ted.....I thought he said he was going to wait until after the holidays before he did anything.....I hope his momma is okay. He will check in.......I have confidence he won't let everyone go for long without telling on himself....:)
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Miz, that's a great idea to do something positive to memorialize your Mom! At our little community church, when my niece was killed on Christmas eve several years ago, we planted a dogwood tree in the front of the church. A living memorial that blooms & gives life back through the oxygen & beauty. We have a friend who set up a small college scholarship to memorialize a loved one...Doesn't have to be big & epensive...maybe at Illinois?! We know a lady who did a prayer garden with a bench, fountain, shrubs & flowers at a church. If she liked books you could donate books in her name to the library, or start a book drive for the school library in her name. If she liked animals you could help the Humane Society with a pet adoption. Ask if you can name one of the animals her name & help find that kitty or doggie a good home. You could also start a fund to purchase bullet-proof vests for police dogs that don't have them. If she was especially fond of the holidays, using one of her recipes, make a batch & take them to your local fire dept. or police dept. If she loved to knit, crochet, paint, etc. & you can too, teach a class at your rec. center, the college continuing ed. dept., Hobby Lobby, etc. If you charge for the class donate the money to her favorite charity. If you knit, etc., but don't want to teach a class, make several hats, scarves, etc. to donate to a nursing home, a homeless shelter or send them to our heros in Iraq or Afganistan with a card telling about her knitting. After my Aunt passed I became really involved in the American Cancer Society. When my Mom goes we will make a contribution in her name to 'Smile Train', which is an organization that she likes that does operations on kids with cleft pallets. It will change a child's life forever. The sky's the limit! If she was anything like you, & I believe she probalby was just as caring as you are, she'd love for you to do something to help someone else. Find something that's especially important to you & reflects her!

Love you! We all do!
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Jam, thanks for the info about the cat bite. It appears that our frisky feline probably had what I'd like to call 'mouse mouth', because even though I've taken care of the wounds, it's still become infected. Not bad, but some. Will probably have to go to the doc with this one. That darn cat! lol

Joke Time...To commorate my cat bite...

What does a cat do when it gets mad? It has a hissy fit.
What do you call a loving cat bite? Cat nip!
How do you know when your cat has been using your computer? When your mouse has teeth marks on it!
How do you spell mousetrap in just three letters? C-A-T!
What did the cat do when he swallowed some cheese?
He waited by the mouse hole with baited breath!
What did the mouse say when the cat bit his tail?
That's the end of me!
What do cats like to eat for breakfast? Mice Krispies.
What does a cat call a bowlful of mice? A purrr-fect meal!
What does a cat like to eat on a hot day? A mice cream cone.
What is a cat's favorite song? Three Blind Mice
What's a cat's favorite dessert? Chocolate mouse!
How do cats end a fight? They hiss and make up.
What do you say to your cat when you go out?
Have a mice day!

That being said...Have a mice day!
Love & hugs,
Peach
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Miz I bought and had my son and grand-daughter planr a blue Hygrenga-snowball bush in the church flower bed after he died it was a favorite of his.
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Hi guys just to say hallo. I am writing on the old computer which is full of virus, so I have to take it back to the technician. The new computer is broken and it's at the technician.
I'm well and alive but I don't know when the next communication will be. I have still to recover my passwords..
What a mess
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Hi Rossella, hope your computer problems get resolved soon. Glad to hear that your are alive and well. I'm not really awake yet, still having the first cup of java (coffee)
ssk
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I just had a really sad thought.My family settled the state of Tenn.with Andrew Jackson.We go way back.Been here since slave days.My granddad helped people through th e depression.My dad helped people.My brothers are the first men in my particular family that are totally self absorbed-shame on them.They are also the only men in my family that has escaped war.During the lawsuit with all the dirt they did to me I never attacked them back-90% of the lawsuit was based on lies and mistruths-I NEVER told one lie on them.I let them tramp me in the ground-kept thinking they would come around.I did not want it on my conscious I attacked my own family-bad aura. Mayor dude not kin-aura doesn't apply in this situation.
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Good Morning. Thanks for the wonderful suggestions. I just do not have the energy right now to do much of anything. I gotta go to work at 1:00 and I'm dreading that. I woke up at like 11:30 last night, got up and had a smoke, got on the computer for a bit and laid back down. Had a hard time getting back to sleep. I don't understand it cause my meds usually knock me out. I sure hope I get a break from these bad days soon. It's really overwhelming me. I just want to lay in bed. I'm sorry to vent like this. Here most of you are still dealing with care giving. You would think I'd feel less stress now.

love,
miz
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NOT true MIZ-aSK NANCE-BOBBIE-Your going through after shock.You don't pop right back up like a jack in the box.It'll will take a year to 2 years to get back to normal and then you will still be a different person than before,in a good way.After you heal,you will be a very strong Miz,don't put a time frame on your grief.Carry a bouquet of flowers to work,set them on counter-say these are in honor of my mom,you will be surprised how much those little things will help.
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