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yes i saw that lol . oh well bobbie can still have a margaitta , all weekend ! where is she anyway ? bet shes peekin in the box . maybe boat on the water now and takin it for a ride ? wish u could have a extra one more day on her boat . bet ure lookin fwrd to gettin home to ur kitties and ur bed ahh and see ur doc . u have a safe flight tnite my dear , hubby back yet ?
Harde..cause usually I don't do internet on the weekends...but I may be taking my laptop to mom's so I can research Assisted Living Facilities.....close to her house. It's so friggin hard..none have websites and it's all going through these friggin agencies that contact and find them..and then I find the same ones they do...so what's the deal. Why are they not properly displayed on websites...so fn hard. I hate this crap. My mom's caregiver just called and said my mom was crying for me and starting up again. She leaves at 4:00 on fridays and I get off around 6:00 and head over there and get there between 6:30 and 7:00 depending. She put my mom on the phone and I said you have to stop this nonsense..you don't need anything you just want someone there to control...if you don't stop it youre heading to the nursing home I told her...I told her I would see her later and it kinda stopped. I hate how they want to manipulate you..I am so friggin tired of her. For 2 years it's been all about her..and she doesn't get what I have done for her, and will never get it due to decline and they don't think correctly...which has been a pain with my mom all her life cause she never thought correctly about a lot of subjects...oh I wish it was over...I know that is wrong..but I am tired of it. 12 years she has been on my back...and it's just getting more trying towards the end...oh I wish there was some magic pixie dust I can sprinkle over the whole situation...Calgon take her away........................LOL!
Wish me luck CareAngels for this weekend I feel will be very trying...and I think I will take laptop with me after all. So will be saying Happy Ani on the proper day after all.
praite - , have u talked to anybody , somebody , caregivers that comes sits with ur mom . etc about where is the best place for ur mom to be at ? word of mouth about a nursing home , which is the best and which is a worst , etc . it is not easy , i put dad in rehab at the place i thought it was nice , yes its nice outside and smells great inside they get rid of wet diapers right away but the care sucks ! lack of help and im helpin pa and thinkin damn , one infla i went to visit dad in , phewey ! it stinks in there , they let diapers piled up in trash bag in bathroom , its house keepings job to take them away , blah nasty shitty ass place i have ever been to , glad i took himout there and bring him home with me . i wish you luck , i think ur mom may be happier where she can gripe at alotta people all day . so u can work and not havin to worry about ur mom , love u pirate , xoxo
Georgia Peach was on the horn with me to walk me through it. So much and so amazing and and and
DEEF!!!! what a beautiful scarf and ornament! It's a huge sand dollar with a lighthouse scene that Deef painted herself. It's incredible. I have it hanging over the trunk refrigerator and secure on a hook. I'll mount it in the picture frame so it won't move when the boat does. The scarf is knitted with a varigated yarn that is all the colors of the ocean. The pattern looks like waves. Gorgeous. Thank you so much Deef. I love it all!! And sea shell chocolates!!
OK, Miz and Peachie got together and pulled a whammy on me. We now have embroidered sweat shirts with Barbara B and a life ring as the logo. Perfect! There is one for me that says Captain and one for Miz that says Crew. Amazing. listen to this: and we now have the famous OBMAJ t shirts!! Miz, Peachie and the Crew of the Barbara B have been conspiring!!! Linda, I know you're in there and Christina (where are you?) Deef, Rip, Flex, Maxine!!, Kuli, Jam, ssk,Cuz, Angie, Ted, Jen, True, Selfish Sib, Rossella!!! Pirate!, Chillout and Headbanger, everybody and everybody. You Guys!!! Thank you thank you!
AND there's a Sailor Bear! from the Crew!!! He is now on the bridge and I am happy that there is someone else here to drive the boat so I can go down and make a sandwich. Seriously. He can sit on the helm when the autopilot is on. Just in case the Coast Guard goes by.....
There's CAT TOYS!!! the Cat loved the toys and is still loving the box and packing peanuts! She's going to sleep like a rock. Peach!
A beautiful journal to use as a Guest Book on the boat. I'm going to send it to Miz with the rest of her presents and she can write some and then send it back and then everyone who comes on the boat can sign in. Great Idea!!!
GIANT BOX OF SEE'S CANDY!!!!! Hey I opened it and got into it what can I say. I know that I was supposed to share it and the whole deal but Miz ain't here and she left her ice cream and I go ahold of that too. Christina!!!! See's Candy!!! Thank you thank you! Of course i haven't seen See's for a few years! Don'tcha love those little stores with all of the black and white? Are they still around?
And Beautiful Cards. A great Christmas letter from TrueColors aka Elizabeth. Thank you so much for thinking of me! Nice picture! A lovely Christmas and birthday card from Deef!! An incredible card from Miz with a pic of her Cat, Sandy hugging the bear we all sent her. An hilarious thank you card from Peach honoring the Grossed Out Thread with a picture of a kitten fixin to shred a roll of TP! Peachie has the beautiful calligraphy and the inside of the card where she wrote is so beautiful that I want to put it in the glass frame with Deef's lighthouse and Peach and husbands picture as well as Miz's Sandy and the bear! Thank you again Peach A Great Birthday card from Linda! Pretty handwriting too! thank you so much Linda! The whole Crew! I almost made it through and then I got to Christina's card. I read Miz's and then Christina's and that's when I lost it. Good thing Peach was on the phone with me. Christina, that was a beautiful card and thank you so much for thinking of me, seriously. Miz, wow. All of you, thank you for taking the time out of your insane days and thinking of me. You know I have said here that I couldn't imagine anyone thinking of me if I wasn't standing in front of them. Thank you all for thinking of me and thinking nice things about me too. It makes my heart feel so good. And I needed that. We all need that. Please tell me I didn't forget anything or anyone, but I'm sure I did. Please forgive me.
I love you guys. Thank you so much for everything. you all are such astounding people and you all have my absolute respect. lovbob
You're the best, Bobbie. I remember when Peach first notified us of the plan, and I went to Hallmark to find an appropriate card. It was very soon after I found AC, but I knew so quickly what an awesome lady you are, so it was easy. Yes, obviously See's is still around. Little Black and White stores filled with all sorts of chocolates. You let me know what your favorites are, and I'll send anytime, Bobbie. Love Always, Christina
(I haven't read anything today, and I hope to tonight, and I miss you guys:( Mother being a pill and a half the last few nights and I am exhausted from her night time sun downing already attitude.) Will catch up this weekend, and read all about it!!! Love and Muchas Hugs christina
Wow Bobbie it seems quite of a package! I am sorry I did not take part in it, but it seems very nice! Sure you must be very glad! I knew the bear and the chocolate and the cards would arrive, but I didn't know about the other things. I remember that when we were kids we liked to receive a package full of many things!
Three blondes died and found themselves standing before St. Peter. He told them that before they could enter the Kingdom, they had to tell him what Easter represented.
The first blonde, an American, said "Easter is a holiday where they have a big feast and we give thanks and eat turkey."
St. Peter said, "Noooooo," and wouldn't let her in.
The second blonde, a Brit, said "Easter is when we celebrate Jesus's birth and exchange gifts."
St. Peter said, "Noooooo," and he wouldn't let her in either.
The third blonde, a Canadian, said she knew what Easter was, and St.Peter said, "So, tell me.."
She said, "Easter is a Christian holiday that coincides with the Jewish festival of Passover. Jesus was having Passover feast with his disciples when he was betrayed by Judas, and the Romans arrested him. The Romans hung him on the cross and eventually he died. Then they buried him in a tomb behind a very large boulder ... "
St. Peter said, "Verrrrrry good."
Then the blonde continued, "Now, every year the Jews roll away the boulder and Jesus comes out.
If he sees his shadow, we have six more weeks of hockey."
It will be happy anniversary for this thread on Sunday. I won't be around tomorrow or Sunday, I'm taking much needed R&R with hubby. It seems like if he doesn't take me out on Saturdays, I'll go weeks without going outside. Is it normal to become agoraphobic when you are a caregiver for an extended period of time?
Miz...I hope you tended to your illness, we were worried about you.
Cuz...you have me rolling on the floor laughing.
Pirate Queen: I understand about the Calgon....to my eternal shame I think the reaper has lost our address and I am beginning to despair ever being liberated again.
Christina: You rock
Lhardebeck: Thanks for looking out for me. I'll be around, I can't promise to be good though. OMG I wrote a doozy of a post today and then edited the living daylights out of it so I didn't overshare LOL. I should have just posted it all here instead.
Bobbie: Enjoy your box! That is so sweet and so deserving. This thread and your devotion should be marked with something special. You all have a way of making us all feel normal in a very non-normal situation.
To everyone else...love ya and see you in a few days.
Good Morning, Everyone. Very early morning!! We're in the car on the way to the Jacksonville Airport. We got up at 3:00am. It is now 5:00am. I am still sick. Throat hurts so bad. Can't wait to get home and go to bed. Pirate, you are right, those Ricolla are much much better than Hall's. Taste kinda nasty though. But that's okay. I would rather not have a damn sore throat than tasty cough drops. I'm so sorry I missed watching Bobbie open her box of goodies/presents. She is right. You all are so wonderful!! and so is Peach for getting everything to you!! K, I'm gonna sign off and see if I can maybe sleep with this loud radio music hubby's got going on. ;) It's okay though cause he's gotta stay awake to drive. Love yous!!
miz, wishing you a good flight back home. I was planning to take a ride with mom to see the snowy parts of the state but drove about 15 min and turned around.(yesterday) Too boring going it alone (with mom who is nonverbal) I'm going to call the neighbor and invite over to visit. Say "please, please, just stop by for a half hour so I can talk to someone." crazy life, these days. glad bobbie got to open her "Treasure Chest" I have a small box of chocolats here which I'm trying to hold off to eat.! I used to feed leftovers to my poor dog (who did get kinda chubby) but I couldn't resist. I'm thinking about Pirate who is struggling with the idea of placing mom and, dealing with the caregivers, etc. It's worth it to look at the facilities, but don't let them talk you into anything , they are hungry for business, I think. Sunny day here, waiting for cna so I can take a walk. good morning all.
Good Morning Everyone! It's finally sunny and not too cold today, I feel like i might be starting to come up out of my funk. Mom comes home on monday, and I'm looking forward to doing the best I can for her and me, I've tried to shake off the anger and the resentment, and accept the situation, and I'm ready to just do the best I can with what we've got, and to make mom's days as pleasant as I can. everything else be damned. So, as I head into the home-stretch, wish me luck (as I know you do) I learned a lot from this thread, especially that a major part of this next phase is taking good care OF MYSELF. I hope you all take your own advice and make sure that you do the same for YOURSELVES! Love all of you.
good morning folks . woke up at 4 am to change dad and fed him his bfast . told him its 4 in the morning pa , he said oh i have to getready for work . :-( i thought oh great now he s gonna argue with me about gettin dress , so i fed him his bfast instead so he went back to sleep with tv on .... just woke up a bit ago with blasted headache , what the hell !
bobbie - feels like cmas when u open the package and see all kinds of goodies in there :-) u deserve it my dear friend . i know u will enjoy all those goodies . wish miz wasnt so sick . damn i got to thinkin i hopei dont get sick when i do come down there one day . if i do ill pop every meds there is and we can still get in trouble :-) anyway am happy for u bobbie .
kitchen is a wreck and i better go clean it up , if pa still sleeping then i ll zoom clean , think i am going to have 3 grandkids here today so the parents can go car shopping , they havent called yet to confirm it , i told them monday yeah ill watch em and when u get back u can watch pa for me so hubby and i can go out to eat , think i blew that one . oh well whatever . ted- glad u re lookin fwrd to bring ur mom home monday and hope all for the best for u aand ur mom . have a happy saturday ! xoxo
Thank You, sskape. We are looking forward to getting home now and seeing the kitties and getting rested. I'm so glad I have tomorrow off before I go back to work on Monday if I am well enough. We're in Baltimore waiting for our flight to Indy. Then drive home and there ya go. Last two times I been to Florida I been sick. Weird. But...I got to meet Bobbie!!!!! I am so grateful!!!!! I wish I could have seen the bear and everything else. Maybe Bobbie will post some pics?? or maybe Peach?? K, off to go through security. Gotta take the damn shoes off. Crazy shit. Pirate, I sure feel for ya and what you are going through. Love yous!!
Thanks....not sure I feel better....that's my version of a scream...damned old woman, I am really starting to dislike her. Here's the scenario....made plans last night to go to KC to City Market....and then the famous Bryant's Barbeque for lunch today. Got col bathed and hair washed yesterday. Hubby woke up this morning with chills and running back and forth to bathroom....oops no outing today. So I trudge through melting snow to get mail and the col newspaper....and toss it to her over deck railing...asked if she got undies changed okay, yes, but didn't get a pad in the back. Told her I would be down later....in the mail is $800 refund check for her new ears so I thought she would like that and while I'm there I'll put the pad in. She had made a beeline to bathroom to change sopping, wet drawers before I got down there. Pissed me off, but I blew it off, then I see doggie has been peeing all around the kitchen trash can again. So I clean that....then I have to explain to col that we will not be going to Top of the Crown (high dollar restaurant downtown KC). Hubby hates the place. Anyway I look at her better and I see her eyes are running, red, swollen and the black mascara is just caked on. I suggested that since we weren't going anywhere today she might take the mascara off and let her eyes rest so she doesn't get an infection. Took her all of 10 seconds to declare war. She started screaming at me how she's worn mascara since she was twenty....and it's Almay....can't cause problems and she will do what she wants to do. I asked her who she thought would be taking her back and forth to the doctor when she got an infection and she snarled back that she would just sit right there. I tried to reason with her and got nowhere, so I took the tube away from her. Even hubby says he's tired of her looking like a clown when we go out. We've seen her on the camera sometimes when she is globbing that crap on, then she sits and wipes her face where her eyes are running. I know God doesn't like these thoughts going through my mind, and I really need to find a quiet little hole to crawl into for a bit. Thank you all for letting me scream....what I really want to do is have a good cry. Hugz to all of you!
Hey Jam ~ You just made the 9,800th post so maybe that'll make you feel better? I can imagine your tension! Cripes! Bacteria is bacteria Almay or not. Where did these women learn this stuff. Maybe you could give her a glamour mask to wear?
My dad had eye surgery for a burst retina. Same crap - wouldn't believe the doctor or me. It was nasty & he is still blind in that eye with little vision in the other.
His wife's graveside service was just barely finished, when there was a massive clap of thunder, followed by a tremendous bolt of lightning, accompanied by even more thunder rumbling in the distance. The little, old man looked at the pastor and calmly said, "Well, she's there."
Please dear friend, remember to hate the disease NOT the person, ok? Also, go and buy her the waterproof mascara. I use Great Lash, pink tube. I"m a canine behaviorist so sometimes I suggest to the clients one thing we can do is remove the trash can out of sight, buy a smaller one that will fit under the sink. Also, if you see him going towards the area where the can was tell him, "let's go pottie" and walk him outside, after he's done, praise him and let him back in. Hope this helps... :)
Bjhutter, nobody hates anybody. We just vent because we think it helps us not to get crazy. The title of the thread is: "Need to vent?" It's difficult sometimes to be rational and say "poor one, it's not her fault, it's her illness, this is not her anymore". Sometimes you are just overwhelmed by your life. Sometimes it happens you lose your patience! We are human beings, not angels. At least, I am not....
Jam, the joke is great. With my mother it would not be thunders and lightnings, it would be the "mumble mumble mumble" of the clouds when the thunderstorm is about to burst... Constant mumble mumble mumble.
BTW, the dog Jam talked about belongs to her mother in law and her mother in law does not allow the dog to go out.... It's not the dog's fault , he would go out if he could! If you follow our stories a little bit more, you will understand... Stay with us! I'm Italian and I have an Alz mother as stubborn as a donkey....
Show me the way to go home. I'm tired and I wanna go to bed. I had a little drink about an hour ago (not really) and it went straight to my head. Wherever I may roam. On land or sea or foam. You'll always a hear me singin' this song. Show me the way to go home.
Just missin' the kitties. Own bed always sounds good too although I sure had no trouble sleeping on the BOAT!!
Yep, we're on the home stretch. Traveling from Indianapolis to home in our own car. We'll be there about 5:30 central time. :))
love, miz
P.S. Jam, you're beautiful, love ya. Would col let you do her makeup? Prolly not. Just askin'. :)
OMG I just got enlightened. I was telling hubby a story about what one of the caregivers on the thread is going through and he says what, is this a joke. He seriously thought I was telling a joke. That's how warped and demented our lives are/were. You could not make this stuff up. Wow. He in no way was insulting. Simply thought I was telling a joke. LOL I don't tell jokes that well. Anyway, there ya go. (I think I'm starting to talk a bit like Bobbie.) I'll call them Bobbieisms or something. Sorry All, I'm tired, sick and goofy AND if that weren't bad enough, back in Illinois.
Bjhutter.......thanks for your input. I don't hate my mil....and yes it's the disease I hate. As long as this woman is getting her way she is an angel and so easy to deal with.....but tell her she can't or shouldn't do something and she becomes a hateful, screaming old crone. She globs on blackest black mascara to the point it's embarrassing to be seen out in public with her. It smears under her eyes and they tear up and run. She used to wear individual false lashes and would wear them so long that one day sitting in a restaurant the waitress was looking at her funny....lashes were falling off and stuck to her face. She has beautiful white hair, which she insists on wearing past her shoulders, her bangs are stick straight and hang in her eyes. She puts hot rollers in her hair, just randomly on top and the sides....never touches the back and won't take some help. These hot rollers are nasty, caked with hair and hairspray. Then she puts big, long pieces of toilet paper over her ears to keep them from burning and of course won't wear her hearing aids while doing this. She fell at least twice before we moved her close to us...her front teeth are chipped and black and she REFUSES to go to the dentist. Now for the dog.....when I tell her to let him out more often, her excuse is "I never see him potty in the house"...duh.......she has trained this little guy to potty by telling him to "go be a good boy"....on that's real helpful when you are petting him or want to praise him. Then she stands at the back door and watches him.....he hikes his leg once, heads back inside and she lets him in. We have told her to stop that, walk away and let him wander. My goodness, we have 7 acres of ground here!!! But she thinks he will die if he is outside. And by the way, this is a yorkie mix...20 lbs...the vet wants him to lose weight and she will fix him a frozen Banquet dinner and give it to him and if you say anything to her, she will give you this snide little smile and say "he's so cute" and IGNORE anything. There is a possibility that he has a cancer on his bottom. About a month ago I noticed blood on him, took him to the vet, went and poked medicine down his throat twice a day to get him cleared up, all the while she won't stop feeding him "people food", which gives him diarrhea. Yesterday I saw his whole bottom covered in poop.....bathed him and bad spot is back on his bottom. So now I get to take him back to vet and try to figure out what she is feeding him to cause the continuous problems. And she is about the most ungrateful creature I have ever encountered. Hate her....no I don't.....today she has made me miss my own mother something horrible. I wish I could just talk to her and tell her how much I appreciated her but no I get to be screamed at. Time to take her night meds.....but told hubby he has to go with me to run interference. Since she is not getting her mascara back, I might need protecting....lol Thank you rossella.........you are an angel. Glad miz gets to sleep in her own bed tonight.....you will feel better. Hope everyone has peace in your lives tonight.... Hugz to all!
You know, after four years of this "situation" I am beginning to believe nursing homes are a good thing and there for a reason. One it is a paid service, it is responsive to the state and issues of health and welfare and hygiene and safety are of legal import and they are looking after clients, people they do not have a life long history of knowing. Whether you had a good child hood or a poor one, you have had (presumably) a lifetime with these people AND even if you love them and wish to care for them you can just be overwhelmed both with the often onerous, and constant tasks of careing for them as well as over loading on their company. If the relationship you had with this person was strained or abusive in your past, it really makes for a compounded mess of feelings of resentment, obligation, guilt and just bone weariness over the whole thing... At a nursing home, they are a client, everyone is equal, there are standards of care and the comfort of distance. You may very well have a nurse at the home who loves the client but they won't have the emotionally loaded life history as well, clouding issues of care and the stresses it entails... I do understand not wanting to "Throw away a loved one" as if that is what it is. The desire to not abandon Mother or Father to strangers...But I honestly wonder if that might, under all these other issues BE the best choice for many of us?... When we have gotten to the point where we have sacrifced our time, our other relationships with children, spouse friends even other siblings, when we are literally wearing ourselves to shreds, working ourselves into sickness has it not gone too far? "They took care of us..." Yes, when we were children...To the expense of all else? Did they run themselves into an early grave, dissolve partnerships, neglect their own health too look after us? Did they really? I don't see it. A child works it self into Your life and you adjust...care giving for an elderly parent or grandparent becomes your life and it consumes you bit by bit. The article mentions friends slipping away, spouses threatening divorce, work suffering...That IS YOUR LIFE! It isn't even a good excuse to say "Well you can have a life later stop complaining.."...When? People do not have expiration dates stamped on them... Some people take on care-giving as a necessary for the time being that leaches away decades of their life...Well this is part of your life they say...No it becomes all of your life and somehow just because you are related by blood, it is allowed to and you are informed by some that you should not only Not feel angry, ripped off or confused... you should feel blessed to have the opportunity to waste away under the yoke of this extended period of a loved ones dying. A process that is becoming so common in the West with the "wonders of modern medicine", stretching the lifespan not only beyond use and health but beyond reason and sense... Why wouldn't this be an upsetting, horrifying, isolating burden...We are not trained nurses, or therapists but we are expected to take on these positions, along with handling there business issues, scheduling their lives, driving them here and there to appointments, making sure they don't come to harm or harm themselves out of stubbornness or dementia issues...Caring for a once strong, competent loved one as if they are a recalcitrant child at the expense of every other human relationship in our lives....WHY!!! If you have Guilt, Love, Family Loyalty, God Issues, Like to be dumped on by life, need to feel needed, don't trust anyone else to do it, fear the loved one feeling abandoned, Enjoy being stressed out and worked to death, or just feel it is you Duty to the loved one...You are better off than some...Though it doesn't lesson the work, it may ease the burden...But for some of us...I really think paying someone who is trained to give the correct care for the person in question is the way to go.... For me...Unfortunately it is not my decision to make...But I can tell you...For my mother, caring for her father falling under all those reasons above.......even she is starting to question this task she has taken on...And she loves her father...She has had only two months of what I have had to deal with for four years........and she....is really not sure about this anymore.....and yet it goes on.....
Hi Everyone. We are home. Kitties are good. House is still filthy. I guess the house fairies didn't feel like cleaning either. I had two messages on my home phone and it turns out my friend in the nursing home passed away while we were gone. I missed her visitation and funeral. I am very sad. She was so dear to me. I've known her since I can't remember and she was really good and kind to me when I was a kid. I went and saw her before we left for Florida and I am so glad I did. It was a day where I had done some running and I was tired but something told me I really needed to go see her. Turned out she had been sick and was in bed in a hospital gown. I am so very glad I went that day. I told her that day that something told me I needed to go see her and she said "The Lord works in mysterious ways." Yes, He does. I am sad but she was not happy and had not been for years. She's at peace now and that's good and I can picture her and Mom having a happy conversation up in heaven.
K, I'm gonna go for now. Eating soup. Take good care, Everyone and tell the ones you love that you do.
Hey bobbie!!! Glad you got the stuff, You do so much for everyone else it was time we all did something for you! Hope you enjoy your funs and remember we are all grateful for this thread you started and for your support, advice, humor, encouragement and defense from bullies!!! Jen
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bet ure lookin fwrd to gettin home to ur kitties and ur bed ahh and see ur doc .
u have a safe flight tnite my dear , hubby back yet ?
Wish me luck CareAngels for this weekend I feel will be very trying...and I think I will take laptop with me after all. So will be saying Happy Ani on the proper day after all.
Waving to all!
it is not easy , i put dad in rehab at the place i thought it was nice , yes its nice outside and smells great inside they get rid of wet diapers right away but the care sucks ! lack of help and im helpin pa and thinkin damn , one infla i went to visit dad in , phewey ! it stinks in there , they let diapers piled up in trash bag in bathroom , its house keepings job to take them away , blah nasty shitty ass place i have ever been to , glad i took himout there and bring him home with me .
i wish you luck , i think ur mom may be happier where she can gripe at alotta people all day . so u can work and not havin to worry about ur mom , love u pirate , xoxo
OMG!!!!
YOU GUYS!!!!!!
HOW LONG HAVE YOU ALL BEEN PLANNING THIS????
OK, Here we go:
Georgia Peach was on the horn with me to walk me through it.
So much and so amazing and and and
DEEF!!!! what a beautiful scarf and ornament! It's a huge sand dollar with a lighthouse scene that Deef painted herself. It's incredible. I have it hanging over the trunk refrigerator and secure on a hook. I'll mount it in the picture frame so it won't move when the boat does.
The scarf is knitted with a varigated yarn that is all the colors of the ocean. The pattern looks like waves. Gorgeous.
Thank you so much Deef. I love it all!!
And sea shell chocolates!!
OK, Miz and Peachie got together and pulled a whammy on me. We now have embroidered sweat shirts with Barbara B and a life ring as the logo. Perfect!
There is one for me that says Captain and one for Miz that says Crew. Amazing.
listen to this: and we now have the famous OBMAJ t shirts!!
Miz, Peachie and the Crew of the Barbara B have been conspiring!!! Linda, I know you're in there and Christina (where are you?) Deef, Rip, Flex, Maxine!!, Kuli, Jam, ssk,Cuz, Angie, Ted, Jen, True, Selfish Sib, Rossella!!! Pirate!, Chillout and Headbanger, everybody and everybody. You Guys!!!
Thank you thank you!
AND there's a Sailor Bear! from the Crew!!! He is now on the bridge and I am happy that there is someone else here to drive the boat so I can go down and make a sandwich. Seriously. He can sit on the helm when the autopilot is on. Just in case the Coast Guard goes by.....
There's CAT TOYS!!! the Cat loved the toys and is still loving the box and packing peanuts! She's going to sleep like a rock.
Peach!
A beautiful journal to use as a Guest Book on the boat. I'm going to send it to Miz with the rest of her presents and she can write some and then send it back and then everyone who comes on the boat can sign in. Great Idea!!!
GIANT BOX OF SEE'S CANDY!!!!! Hey I opened it and got into it what can I say. I know that I was supposed to share it and the whole deal but Miz ain't here and she left her ice cream and I go ahold of that too.
Christina!!!! See's Candy!!! Thank you thank you! Of course i haven't seen See's for a few years!
Don'tcha love those little stores with all of the black and white?
Are they still around?
And Beautiful Cards.
A great Christmas letter from TrueColors aka Elizabeth. Thank you so much for thinking of me! Nice picture!
A lovely Christmas and birthday card from Deef!!
An incredible card from Miz with a pic of her Cat, Sandy hugging the bear we all sent her.
An hilarious thank you card from Peach honoring the Grossed Out Thread with a picture of a kitten fixin to shred a roll of TP!
Peachie has the beautiful calligraphy and the inside of the card where she wrote is so beautiful that I want to put it in the glass frame with Deef's lighthouse and Peach and husbands picture as well as Miz's Sandy and the bear!
Thank you again Peach
A Great Birthday card from Linda! Pretty handwriting too! thank you so much Linda!
The whole Crew!
I almost made it through and then I got to Christina's card. I read Miz's and then Christina's and that's when I lost it. Good thing Peach was on the phone with me.
Christina, that was a beautiful card and thank you so much for thinking of me, seriously.
Miz, wow.
All of you, thank you for taking the time out of your insane days and thinking of me. You know I have said here that I couldn't imagine anyone thinking of me if I wasn't standing in front of them. Thank you all for thinking of me and thinking nice things about me too. It makes my heart feel so good. And I needed that. We all need that.
Please tell me I didn't forget anything or anyone, but I'm sure I did. Please forgive me.
I love you guys. Thank you so much for everything.
you all are such astounding people and you all have my absolute respect.
lovbob
Yes, obviously See's is still around. Little Black and White stores filled with all sorts of chocolates. You let me know what your favorites are, and I'll send anytime, Bobbie.
Love Always,
Christina
Will catch up this weekend, and read all about it!!!
Love and Muchas Hugs
christina
I remember that when we were kids we liked to receive a package full of many things!
Three blondes died and found themselves standing before St. Peter. He told them that before they
could enter the Kingdom, they had to tell him what Easter represented.
The first blonde, an American, said "Easter is a holiday where they have a big feast and we give
thanks and eat turkey."
St. Peter said, "Noooooo," and wouldn't let her in.
The second blonde, a Brit, said "Easter is when we celebrate Jesus's birth and exchange gifts."
St. Peter said, "Noooooo," and he wouldn't let her in either.
The third blonde, a Canadian, said she knew what Easter was, and St.Peter said, "So, tell me.."
She said, "Easter is a Christian holiday that coincides with the Jewish festival of Passover. Jesus
was having Passover feast with his disciples when he was betrayed by Judas, and the Romans
arrested him. The Romans hung him on the cross and eventually he died. Then they buried him
in a tomb behind a very large boulder ... "
St. Peter said, "Verrrrrry good."
Then the blonde continued, "Now, every year the Jews roll away the boulder and Jesus comes out.
If he sees his shadow, we have six more weeks of hockey."
St. Peter fainted.
When you carry the Bible,
Satan gets a headache.
When you open it, he collapses.
When he sees you reading it, he faints.
When he sees you are living what you read, he flees!!
And, if you are about to forward this message,
he will try and discourage you ....
I defeated him!!
Will you?
--
God Loves You
And So Do I
Have a Good
Day
Buckwheat of the Little Rascals fame grew up, became a Muslim, and changed his name.....
He now goes by
Kareem of Wheat.
Miz...I hope you tended to your illness, we were worried about you.
Cuz...you have me rolling on the floor laughing.
Pirate Queen: I understand about the Calgon....to my eternal shame I think the reaper has lost our address and I am beginning to despair ever being liberated again.
Christina: You rock
Lhardebeck: Thanks for looking out for me. I'll be around, I can't promise to be good though. OMG I wrote a doozy of a post today and then edited the living daylights out of it so I didn't overshare LOL. I should have just posted it all here instead.
Bobbie: Enjoy your box! That is so sweet and so deserving. This thread and your devotion should be marked with something special. You all have a way of making us all feel normal in a very non-normal situation.
To everyone else...love ya and see you in a few days.
miz
glad bobbie got to open her "Treasure Chest" I have a small box of chocolats here which I'm trying to hold off to eat.! I used to feed leftovers to my poor dog (who did get kinda chubby) but I couldn't resist.
I'm thinking about Pirate who is struggling with the idea of placing mom and, dealing with the caregivers, etc. It's worth it to look at the facilities, but don't let them talk you into anything , they are hungry for business, I think.
Sunny day here, waiting for cna so I can take a walk. good morning all.
It's finally sunny and not too cold today, I feel like i might be starting to come up out of my funk. Mom comes home on monday, and I'm looking forward to doing the best I can for her and me, I've tried to shake off the anger and the resentment, and accept the situation, and I'm ready to just do the best I can with what we've got, and to make mom's days as pleasant as I can. everything else be damned.
So, as I head into the home-stretch, wish me luck (as I know you do)
I learned a lot from this thread, especially that a major part of this next phase is taking good care OF MYSELF. I hope you all take your own advice and make sure that you do the same for YOURSELVES!
Love all of you.
just woke up a bit ago with blasted headache , what the hell !
bobbie - feels like cmas when u open the package and see all kinds of goodies in there :-) u deserve it my dear friend . i know u will enjoy all those goodies . wish miz wasnt so sick . damn i got to thinkin i hopei dont get sick when i do come down there one day . if i do ill pop every meds there is and we can still get in trouble :-) anyway am happy for u bobbie .
kitchen is a wreck and i better go clean it up , if pa still sleeping then i ll zoom clean , think i am going to have 3 grandkids here today so the parents can go car shopping , they havent called yet to confirm it , i told them monday yeah ill watch em and when u get back u can watch pa for me so hubby and i can go out to eat , think i blew that one . oh well whatever .
ted- glad u re lookin fwrd to bring ur mom home monday and hope all for the best for u aand ur mom .
have a happy saturday ! xoxo
miz
Thanks....not sure I feel better....that's my version of a scream...damned old woman, I am really starting to dislike her. Here's the scenario....made plans last night to go to KC to City Market....and then the famous Bryant's Barbeque for lunch today. Got col bathed and hair washed yesterday. Hubby woke up this morning with chills and running back and forth to bathroom....oops no outing today. So I trudge through melting snow to get mail and the col newspaper....and toss it to her over deck railing...asked if she got undies changed okay, yes, but didn't get a pad in the back. Told her I would be down later....in the mail is $800 refund check for her new ears so I thought she would like that and while I'm there I'll put the pad in. She had made a beeline to bathroom to change sopping, wet drawers before I got down there. Pissed me off, but I blew it off, then I see doggie has been peeing all around the kitchen trash can again. So I clean that....then I have to explain to col that we will not be going to Top of the Crown (high dollar restaurant downtown KC). Hubby hates the place. Anyway I look at her better and I see her eyes are running, red, swollen and the black mascara is just caked on. I suggested that since we weren't going anywhere today she might take the mascara off and let her eyes rest so she doesn't get an infection. Took her all of 10 seconds to declare war. She started screaming at me how she's worn mascara since she was twenty....and it's Almay....can't cause problems and she will do what she wants to do. I asked her who she thought would be taking her back and forth to the doctor when she got an infection and she snarled back that she would just sit right there. I tried to reason with her and got nowhere, so I took the tube away from her. Even hubby says he's tired of her looking like a clown when we go out. We've seen her on the camera sometimes when she is globbing that crap on, then she sits and wipes her face where her eyes are running. I know God doesn't like these thoughts going through my mind, and I really need to find a quiet little hole to crawl into for a bit. Thank you all for letting me scream....what I really want to do is have a good cry. Hugz to all of you!
You just made the 9,800th post so maybe that'll make you feel better?
I can imagine your tension! Cripes! Bacteria is bacteria Almay or not. Where did these women learn this stuff.
Maybe you could give her a glamour mask to wear?
My dad had eye surgery for a burst retina. Same crap - wouldn't believe the doctor or me. It was nasty & he is still blind in that eye with little vision in the other.
How long can you do this?
And that's how I want to go...........:)
I"m a canine behaviorist so sometimes I suggest to the clients one thing we can do is remove the trash can out of sight, buy a smaller one that will fit under the sink. Also, if you see him going towards the area where the can was tell him, "let's go pottie" and walk him outside, after he's done, praise him and let him back in. Hope this helps... :)
It's difficult sometimes to be rational and say "poor one, it's not her fault, it's her illness, this is not her anymore". Sometimes you are just overwhelmed by your life. Sometimes it happens you lose your patience!
We are human beings, not angels. At least, I am not....
Jam, the joke is great. With my mother it would not be thunders and lightnings, it would be the "mumble mumble mumble" of the clouds when the thunderstorm is about to burst...
Constant mumble mumble mumble.
If you follow our stories a little bit more, you will understand...
Stay with us!
I'm Italian and I have an Alz mother as stubborn as a donkey....
I'm tired and I wanna go to bed.
I had a little drink about an hour ago (not really)
and it went straight to my head.
Wherever I may roam.
On land or sea or foam.
You'll always a hear me singin' this song.
Show me the way to go home.
Just missin' the kitties. Own bed always sounds good too although I sure had no trouble sleeping on the BOAT!!
Yep, we're on the home stretch. Traveling from Indianapolis to home in our own car. We'll be there about 5:30 central time. :))
love,
miz
P.S. Jam, you're beautiful, love ya. Would col let you do her makeup? Prolly not. Just askin'. :)
love,
miz
Thank you rossella.........you are an angel.
Glad miz gets to sleep in her own bed tonight.....you will feel better.
Hope everyone has peace in your lives tonight.... Hugz to all!
At a nursing home, they are a client, everyone is equal, there are standards of care and the comfort of distance. You may very well have a nurse at the home who loves the client but they won't have the emotionally loaded life history as well, clouding issues of care and the stresses it entails...
I do understand not wanting to "Throw away a loved one" as if that is what it is. The desire to not abandon Mother or Father to strangers...But I honestly wonder if that might, under all these other issues BE the best choice for many of us?...
When we have gotten to the point where we have sacrifced our time, our other relationships with children, spouse friends even other siblings, when we are literally wearing ourselves to shreds, working ourselves into sickness has it not gone too far?
"They took care of us..." Yes, when we were children...To the expense of all else? Did they run themselves into an early grave, dissolve partnerships, neglect their own health too look after us? Did they really? I don't see it. A child works it self into Your life and you adjust...care giving for an elderly parent or grandparent becomes your life and it consumes you bit by bit.
The article mentions friends slipping away, spouses threatening divorce, work suffering...That IS YOUR LIFE! It isn't even a good excuse to say "Well you can have a life later stop complaining.."...When? People do not have expiration dates stamped on them... Some people take on care-giving as a necessary for the time being that leaches away decades of their life...Well this is part of your life they say...No it becomes all of your life and somehow just because you are related by blood, it is allowed to and you are informed by some that you should not only Not feel angry, ripped off or confused... you should feel blessed to have the opportunity to waste away under the yoke of this extended period of a loved ones dying. A process that is becoming so common in the West with the "wonders of modern medicine", stretching the lifespan not only beyond use and health but beyond reason and sense...
Why wouldn't this be an upsetting, horrifying, isolating burden...We are not trained nurses, or therapists but we are expected to take on these positions, along with handling there business issues, scheduling their lives, driving them here and there to appointments, making sure they don't come to harm or harm themselves out of stubbornness or dementia issues...Caring for a once strong, competent loved one as if they are a recalcitrant child at the expense of every other human relationship in our lives....WHY!!!
If you have Guilt, Love, Family Loyalty, God Issues, Like to be dumped on by life, need to feel needed, don't trust anyone else to do it, fear the loved one feeling abandoned, Enjoy being stressed out and worked to death, or just feel it is you Duty to the loved one...You are better off than some...Though it doesn't lesson the work, it may ease the burden...But for some of us...I really think paying someone who is trained to give the correct care for the person in question is the way to go....
For me...Unfortunately it is not my decision to make...But I can tell you...For my mother, caring for her father falling under all those reasons above.......even she is starting to question this task she has taken on...And she loves her father...She has had only two months of what I have had to deal with for four years........and she....is really not sure about this anymore.....and yet it goes on.....
K, I'm gonna go for now. Eating soup. Take good care, Everyone and tell the ones you love that you do.
love,
miz