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By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Every night just before bed I tell myself that tomorrow will be a better day and I think of all the things I will accomplish..... Woke to Mom and Dad screaming at each other....ran down stairs and there Dad sat on the floor....naked from the waist down.....had and accident......so much for the talk I had with him last night to call on me and I'll help him get cleaned up. Well my back was already hurting and now after getting him off the floor it's killing me.....must keep going....no one else wants my job. Having one of those days where I want to go to my room...shut the door and feel sorry for myself...but that is never an option....too many people depending on me!
Ted: Thank you for sharing your story with us. It is heart wrenching to hear some of these stories! We make the decision for caring for our family for all the "right" reasons without thinking how physically and financially bankrupt we could possibly become if the scenario lasts for years and years.
My heart cries for all caregivers who have selfish-siblings. Selfish estate vultures that seize assets left in trust to care for the remaining spouse. I think there is a special place in hell for people who steal from family.
*********************************** My Gran is like a yo-yo....the nurse aid was just here and said "I don't understand it; she looked so bad last week, now she is back to her old self". This is the same woman who was supposed to have died in 2009 and looked like she was going to die again last night. I think she is either a cat or a day-walker. If she is an actress…watch out Natalie Portman..my grandma is coming for the oscar.
*%#&*!#*&& (Bleeped out by the network censors) The network has inserted the proper rainbow-brite Disney response for political correctness: YAY! We get more time!
It is important to say, I don't wish my grandmother any ill. I love her (the way she was) and honor her. It is just hard to feel like my life is "in pause" waiting for her to move on before I can start again. Yes I am alive, yes I try to enrich my life the best way I can. This is NOT what I want to do forever.
It is not my life's desire for my title to be:
Ass wiping porta-potty assistant; chief nutritionist; wheelchair-driver; medicine-aid; on-call 24-7 emergency response team member; Laundress and stain remover; director of hoarding rehabilitation; personal body assistant and stylist; butler; valet; bed-time buddy; psychiatric assessment technician; banisher of hallucinatory monsters in the closet; exterminator of imagined bugs in the bed and on walls; certified adult diaper genie; translator of moans, shews, grunts, growls, burps, farts, mmhmmms, uh ohs, oh boys, uh huhs, and assorted other repetitive sounds; glorified go-for and grab-it; repository of repetitive ridiculous spun stories of fancy; and never ending repetitive question answerer...I AM A MAGIC 8 BALL all bow before me!!
I've probably left some stuff out. But that is why this 2 year gap on my resume will be so exciting. I also am a pasty-ass hermit since I'm essentially house-bound with my temperature challenged oxygenated ambulatory accident risk.
thanks for the tip ladeeda.....will look for some CitruScent...told her a little earlier when I went down to change her that we need to open doors today and certainly tomorrow to air out....she asks what does it smell like? Not pee.....how do you say it just smells "dead". The pad I use in the back of her undies to pad her bony tailbone was found on the side of the bathtub....she was saving it......for what I don't have a clue and neither did she.
linda....you are a priceless darling.....love reading your posts....I think you finally figured out the "stroke" didn't you?
Banger ~ I'd hire you in a heartbeat with that on your resume! Not talking about care giving either. The real business which I put on hold to ensure genuine proper care for Sir.
I hope your back feels better. My heart goes out to you with your potty trials. TONS OF HUGS TO YOU!
Jam: you are priceless with your description of COL.
Ladeeda Chaquita: you are bananas! But I can see how you miss the fun moments with Ruth. It is the other it is the other 86,439 seconds in the day that we worry about.
We are all pooh-academics you know. How many times have you stared at it, analyzed it, and then exclaimed "That is the last GD time I EVER feed him/her that...WTF is that? How did that happen?"
headbanger ! i agree with u but i cant remmy what i fixed pa yesterday . gave him a good shower which he hasnt had one in a long time . ohhh now he smells like pooohhhh . made a big mess , ack ack . at least it all came out ok , cleaned him up the best i could . never had my bath yet cuz he s hungry so now he s eating and sayin mmm mmm mmm . maybe that ll come out on the other end also ? blah , think i ll go lite a candle . about the spray ,mm i think i ve seen that brand at the gas station , it comes in a small can like chewing tobabcoo ? throw it under the car seats and ur car smells .. shall try that out , id put that in pa s bdrm and bathroom . maybe my bdrm too lol .
My daughter-in-law posted this on FB this morning....just struck my funny bone...................
Figured out why I'm so fat! The shampoo I use in the shower that runs down my body says "for extra volume and body". Going to start using Dawn dish washing soap. It says "dissolves fat that is otherwise difficult to remove. . . . LOL. . .
About dealing with smells and fecal/urine - try the pet store. There is a product called Nature's Miracle (white bottle with red lettering). It has gotten out stuff from our dogs with anxiety squirts (from human food given by well-meaning friends urg!) to my son's bout with the flu on his carpet and mattress. It got out stains and smell for us, and I'm not allergic to it. Worth a try and it's organic. Helen
Thought for the day......Having one grandmachild at home is worse than raising 3 dauhters when we ALL had PMS at the same time. Going shopping....something I use to hate, I now enjoy!
Good remedies here today, thanks to all for the smell remedies. Although I have dogs, and know the products work, I had a mind block to using the goodies for a human application.
I need to get the linament rub next for my neck that someone said works. If it works on lame horses it ought to work on this old mare before I get put out to pasture. MY NECK IS KILLING ME! Do I have to find a farm or tack shop for that? Getting hard to find in the city.
LORI: Totally agree. Having a grandmom home is not the same as it used to be. I no longer care for her chocolate confections...they are stinky. I would rather be shopping...ditto!!
Thank you for CitruScent.....just ordered a bottle from Amazon. I use oil warmers from Bath and Body Works alllllllll over my house.....NO OPEN FLAMES for col. I put an automatic sprayer in her house but it doesn't do the trick and why replace cans constantly if it doesn't work? Ah the good life...almost forgot how it can be.....but right now I have my laptop on my little lap desk, and my butt is on my bed propped up by pillows, drinking raspberry iced tea..yummmmmmy..back is killing me today....keep having spasms....no way can I bend over right now to give col her bath. A little bit of headache but I know that's from my neck and there is nothing I can do for that.....that was the main source of my disability.....herniated discs at C-4,5,6,7 with nerve impingement. So I'm pampering myself today.....or at least for a couple of hrs....col must have bath today. Took tramadol...see if that helps....out of the good stuff....:)
otterdame....It is up to you, do all the research you can and have help. Talk to her doctors and yours. Best intentions and well laid plans better than just assuming it can be done no trouble. For some it is harder than others. for some it lasts a long long time, others only have months or a year or two. There is so much unknown in the situation of taking on the full time duty and caring for a loved one. Most of us have no training in this area even if having been a parent. and it involves a lot of energy. Physical. mental, emotional. It can be rewarding and you may find you were very happy that you could and did help your mother at the end, or it can wear you down and make you angry and resentful. Talk to others in the situation, get local support, there should be ways to contact aging care organizations locally that can help you do what you need and get what you need to make a place for you mother, and keep you both safe and healthy as long as possible and for you to find a way to get away now and then so you do not get over whelmed. This post "Grossed Out" is just that. a venting post where we regale one another of tales of well gross irritating stuff involved in elder care and offer each other support and advice. Don't be scared but don't assume it will be a cake walk either. Best Wishes to you and your mother otterdame.
Still alive here. gonna dye my hair..new schedule, no not work no call and Safeway is out asked. going to library becasue she had to get gas anyway. Ok..
Hope everyone is ok, gonna go back and read posts now...
jsomebody , i think this site scared otter , havent heard from her since , think she ran and didnt look back ... ump ... dye ur hair oh lala . i quit doing that in about a year and half , made me lose 100 or so hair everytime i wash my hair . my hair is too thin so have to quit doing that , gray hair is most welcome for me now . after i had my hair cut it does seems to be fuller now , so i best hang on to what i have now . have a good time at the libraray , i wonder how much is gas now ? last i looked it was 336 per gal . aint that awful ! going to walk my dog now , it seems to be warmin up some now . my dog loves the walk , it helps her to do number 2 real good . bye ya all . xoxo
ram- i have some somas here if u need em for ur back . i wish i had refilled em back in nov shit damnit , its expired when i got them out the other night ohh nooooooooo . my doc prob wont order anymore for me cuz she wants me to run some test onmy back , screw it i dont have thousands of dollars for those test and have em tell me it just a muscle spamas , fk it , i know what my pblm is . stressss . xoxo
Jen....just thought of something to look into for work.....my daughter-in-law was having a terrible time finding work...went to the local school system and worked for 2 years as a "para"....she helped in classrooms with the "disruptive kids"......she only made $8/hr but that was because they paid her all year long, so she would still have income during the summer. She finally had to quit because she was diagnosed with MS and the stairs were hard for her to climb. Still on the bed and only feeling a teeny tiny bit guilty....:)
Thanks guys. Ah no can't work with kids...stick with things I think.
I have pretty thick hair Linda but it is going gray and I am 39 and not having it yet...Just can't
Aunt called, planning to come up for June birthdays. and if he is still alive will be a picnic, that is cake ice cream coffee tea at a local park. If he is not here all the better...
Beh.
Not sure which is more irritating thought. him or sil who is really an immature twat if ever there was one...
otter may come back, she may be getting info first..or have run for the hills...mm lucky. Hope she finds her way.
there, got my colour back...next see if we can get gas and library books and live...Neighbor lady out getting mail on phone having profoundly inane conversation..ah free entertainment....
I started going gray in my 20s. Started highlighting. Kept highlighting more and more and then boyfriend said why don't you just go all blond?? So I did. Been a blond ever since. I do worry about my hair getting thin though. My mom had a beautiful thick head of hair up until her death. Dad was almost totally bald from since I can remember. Mom was a natural blond and Dad had black hair. So I ended up with a not so pretty color. I was blond as a child though. Dyed it red once for hubby. He liked it and I liked it okay but red fades fast. So there you have it. :)
Miz, I'll be sixty one this month and still don't have one gray hair... Wish I did, love the color of my moms but I have too much copper and therefore am told I won;t have any or very little. Been waiting but to no avail! Bet it was a pretty gray and what a great topic to talk about when you were young! :)
I want no part of gray. It's just not for me. Unless maybe when it gets to be a white gray. That might be cool. I went through a rough emotional time in my twenties and I think maybe that caused the gray to pop up. Seems like it happened overnight. I'm not growing old graciously. I'm fighting it every step of the way. :)
I have a few grays and will start dyeing it soon. I 've been dying my mom's hair and she looks cute. I use dark blonde on her. The white grey looks nice on people, but brown hair with grey, not so good, I think.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Woke to Mom and Dad screaming at each other....ran down stairs and there Dad sat on the floor....naked from the waist down.....had and accident......so much for the talk I had with him last night to call on me and I'll help him get cleaned up. Well my back was already hurting and now after getting him off the floor it's killing me.....must keep going....no one else wants my job. Having one of those days where I want to go to my room...shut the door and feel sorry for myself...but that is never an option....too many people depending on me!
Thank you for sharing your story with us. It is heart wrenching to hear some of these stories! We make the decision for caring for our family for all the "right" reasons without thinking how physically and financially bankrupt we could possibly become if the scenario lasts for years and years.
My heart cries for all caregivers who have selfish-siblings. Selfish estate vultures that seize assets left in trust to care for the remaining spouse. I think there is a special place in hell for people who steal from family.
***********************************
My Gran is like a yo-yo....the nurse aid was just here and said "I don't understand it; she looked so bad last week, now she is back to her old self". This is the same woman who was supposed to have died in 2009 and looked like she was going to die again last night. I think she is either a cat or a day-walker. If she is an actress…watch out Natalie Portman..my grandma is coming for the oscar.
*%#&*!#*&& (Bleeped out by the network censors)
The network has inserted the proper rainbow-brite Disney response for political correctness: YAY! We get more time!
It is important to say, I don't wish my grandmother any ill. I love her (the way she was) and honor her. It is just hard to feel like my life is "in pause" waiting for her to move on before I can start again. Yes I am alive, yes I try to enrich my life the best way I can. This is NOT what I want to do forever.
It is not my life's desire for my title to be:
Ass wiping porta-potty assistant; chief nutritionist; wheelchair-driver; medicine-aid; on-call 24-7 emergency response team member; Laundress and stain remover; director of hoarding rehabilitation; personal body assistant and stylist; butler; valet; bed-time buddy; psychiatric assessment technician; banisher of hallucinatory monsters in the closet; exterminator of imagined bugs in the bed and on walls; certified adult diaper genie; translator of moans, shews, grunts, growls, burps, farts, mmhmmms, uh ohs, oh boys, uh huhs, and assorted other repetitive sounds; glorified go-for and grab-it; repository of repetitive ridiculous spun stories of fancy; and never ending repetitive question answerer...I AM A MAGIC 8 BALL all bow before me!!
I've probably left some stuff out. But that is why this 2 year gap on my resume will be so exciting. I also am a pasty-ass hermit since I'm essentially house-bound with my temperature challenged oxygenated ambulatory accident risk.
Ahhh does life get any better?
I'll be here all day. Love HB
Pooh-professor and ID specialist. Is it too late to include that on my resume???
linda....you are a priceless darling.....love reading your posts....I think you finally figured out the "stroke" didn't you?
JAM
I'd hire you in a heartbeat with that on your resume! Not talking about care giving either. The real business which I put on hold to ensure genuine proper care for Sir.
I hope your back feels better. My heart goes out to you with your potty trials. TONS OF HUGS TO YOU!
Jam: you are priceless with your description of COL.
Ladeeda Chaquita: you are bananas! But I can see how you miss the fun moments with Ruth. It is the other it is the other 86,439 seconds in the day that we worry about.
We are all pooh-academics you know. How many times have you stared at it, analyzed it, and then exclaimed "That is the last GD time I EVER feed him/her that...WTF is that? How did that happen?"
Not again....not on my watch!
Love HB
never had my bath yet cuz he s hungry so now he s eating and sayin mmm mmm mmm . maybe that ll come out on the other end also ? blah , think i ll go lite a candle .
about the spray ,mm i think i ve seen that brand at the gas station , it comes in a small can like chewing tobabcoo ? throw it under the car seats and ur car smells ..
shall try that out , id put that in pa s bdrm and bathroom . maybe my bdrm too lol .
Figured out why I'm so fat! The shampoo I use in the shower that runs down my body says "for extra volume and body". Going to start using Dawn dish washing soap. It says "dissolves fat that is otherwise difficult to remove. . . . LOL. . .
I need to get the linament rub next for my neck that someone said works. If it works on lame horses it ought to work on this old mare before I get put out to pasture. MY NECK IS KILLING ME! Do I have to find a farm or tack shop for that? Getting hard to find in the city.
LORI: Totally agree. Having a grandmom home is not the same as it used to be. I no longer care for her chocolate confections...they are stinky. I would rather be shopping...ditto!!
Love~HB
Love and Hugz,
JAM
This post "Grossed Out" is just that. a venting post where we regale one another of tales of well gross irritating stuff involved in elder care and offer each other support and advice. Don't be scared but don't assume it will be a cake walk either. Best Wishes to you and your mother otterdame.
Still alive here. gonna dye my hair..new schedule, no not work no call and Safeway is out asked. going to library becasue she had to get gas anyway. Ok..
Hope everyone is ok, gonna go back and read posts now...
dye ur hair oh lala . i quit doing that in about a year and half , made me lose 100 or so hair everytime i wash my hair . my hair is too thin so have to quit doing that , gray hair is most welcome for me now .
after i had my hair cut it does seems to be fuller now , so i best hang on to what i have now .
have a good time at the libraray , i wonder how much is gas now ? last i looked it was 336 per gal . aint that awful !
going to walk my dog now , it seems to be warmin up some now . my dog loves the walk , it helps her to do number 2 real good .
bye ya all . xoxo
THIS IS A GUILT FREE ZONE!
Love, HB
I have pretty thick hair Linda but it is going gray and I am 39 and not having it yet...Just can't
Aunt called, planning to come up for June birthdays. and if he is still alive will be a picnic, that is cake ice cream coffee tea at a local park. If he is not here all the better...
Beh.
Not sure which is more irritating thought. him or sil who is really an immature twat if ever there was one...
otter may come back, she may be getting info first..or have run for the hills...mm lucky. Hope she finds her way.
http://music.msn.com/music/article.aspx?news=633036>1=28102
there, got my colour back...next see if we can get gas and library books and live...Neighbor lady out getting mail on phone having profoundly inane conversation..ah free entertainment....
Take care everyone...