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Larry, while we appreciate your post, we would really like to welcome you to this sight and encourage you to read further and get the gist of what this thread is about. Most of us here are very seasoned caregivers, have many years experiance with our loved ones, and welcome new members with questions. This thread is intended to be fun, loving, a place to vent, to laugh, to encourage. We respect each other and make ammends if we hurt someones feelings. I encourge you to read as many posts on this thread as you can, to see that we are a tight knit group who care deeply for each other. We have more experiance with Alz/dem, than most people get in a lifetime. So thank you for your post, hope you can join in the fun and read our posts in the vein they are intended. There is a world of love and support here, wish all caregiver knew about us, they would have an easier time with thier day to day tasks. Spread the word about this sight, there is so much information available, so many resources many may not know about.
Ladeeda: you are too nice and patient again today. From now on, I will not say mean things to people who do not know what we are all about. It has taught me, when I go to other threads, after I read the question, I read the first few answers and replies, and if I do not see what I would say, I write something. Thank you for being such a loving, kind example. How's your knee? Love you:) Hey Ted, Lori, Pirate, et similar headcases (moi): I think I know what's going on. You now how when women WORK together they all have their PERIODS together? Yep. That's it. Welcome, Ted, to one more thing you have to buy now. Laugh and the world laughs with you, Cry on Grossed Out, and we all cry together. Except for the ones who are strong at the moment, and they lift us up. I want it to be OUR turn again:)
You are ssoooo sweet. I could tell by Larry's post ( and I am new at this) that he was a professional. He may WORK with ALZ/Dementia but he does't CARE for them. Right? I've looked at some of the other theads where caregivers ask questions and they get ridiculous answers. I'm sure most of you deserve alphabet soup after your names just because of the experience you have. The job is not described in books. My knee jerk reaction is what i just THINK I'd like to say to the sis that just left. She was a school teacher......aaaaahhhhhh
Ladeeda!! You get the Welcome Award! Best welcome to a forgive them they know not what they do fng. congratulations and that was wonderful. thank you on behalf of everybody.
Christine!! You are a wonderful blend of Spiritual and Human and we love you. You are with God without shoving it down out throats. Thank you. On behalf of everybody. The Israeli Army has women in barracks together and they cycle with each other due to the close environment and the sense of smell, believe it or not..... Of course they are activated and attack while they are PMSing. Alright the last part is bs, but the first part is true.
Selfish Siblings!! glad you like disembowel. I like saying certain words; the other day it was clam. Looks funny to me. It's always good to see you SS and I hope your journey is going as smoothy as possible.
Ted!! that's a great idea about the fairy tales. i like the one that you and Allshesgot came up with.
There was an old woman who sh!! in a shoe....
Hey, my mom dropped a duece in a wastebasket one time and I thought I was going to lose my mind.
Pirate!! so good to see you Sgt! Thanks for being here.
OK Larry!! If you are a professional you won't EVER have the range of experience of these caregivers here. Personally i am on a campaign to educate professionals on the finer points of memory care because in my experience of meeting with and watching in action 'pro' caregivers, there is a huge point spread between what they are taught and the actual skills needed to do the job. I expanded on this maybe a hundred or so posts past if you care to read about it.
If you are a familly caregiver, you simply are not at that point in your journey as many of the folks here. Yet. The disease is progressive, no matter which form and this stuff will happen to you too. At that point you will realize that you are on poop patrol and we were on to something. Aside from the poop. Hope you check back and respond because the more pros and or family caregivers we can reach out to, the better the overall care will be for the patients, and the better the heath will be for the caregivers.
Larry, I did copy and paste a quote from you from your wall:
There's no convinsing someone who's memory grows smaller each day. You just have to search out the best assisted living home/center in your area and when you find the best her money can afford....make the move and know that you may have to sneak away. Sounds cruel but it is best for her and you. If she is diagnosed, she can't legally make any decisions. get a P.O.A. for her and fill it out, and Medical P.O.A. set it up with the home/center and pre-arrange to drop her off. The home/center will deal with her/help her settle in and you should talk with them and ask how long before you should visit. She probably has good and bad days...this is a preview of her next stage (the bad days). Just do it and know it's best for all involved. Don't tell her she's moving, just a trip to visit someone. Oct 8 2009 8:45 PM
"Just do it and know it's best for all involved. Don't tell her she's moving, just a trip to visit someone."
ARE YOU INSANE????
if you are indeed a professional, please tell us where so we can get you fired.
Crew: This is an example of not such a great welcome. but for a good reason, In My Humble Opinion.
Lori, I feel for you ono the house clean out. My parent lived in the same house for 54 years when my dad died. We sold the house and mom came to live with me. My dad was almost a hoarder, but it was kept to one floor, neatly, but sooo packed that it was overwhelming. He took over the 900 sq ft upstairs - thank God no attic. But what he had packed up there would have filled a trailor. Plus a 2+ garage that barely fit a PT Cruiser. And a basement with just a path through it! It almost made me a minimalist!! Bless you. When I think of doing tht again, I shudder.
OMG!!! I am shocked and disgusted with what that a$$hole, Larry, said!! Larry was also the name of one of the Three Stooges, if my memory serves me, and it f n well does!!! I don't have dementia yet!!! Oh TED: Remember, it's Dementia, OK? OFD BTW, Thank you, Bobbie, for the nice comp. This is my human side right now, if it wasn't obvious. YEEHAW!!!!! WHOO HOO!!!!!!! OBM----L!!!!!!
AND LET'S REMEMBER TO GIVE BOBBIE STARS, TOO! oops. didn't mean to yell. I was still recovering. got my heart beating fast. gonna run errands now. Maybe without the car:)
Calmly and politely, I think larry's advice was cruel, disgusting, and dehumanizing. If I didn't have guilt before, that advice would give it to me. Whew!! I don't need to see that book!!
Lori! Nik and I have to go north and clean out mom's house, 3K sq ft, floor to ceiling. Dread doesn't even cover it..... Feel your pain sister. Oh, and plus a storage unit. omg....
Miz!! how are you feeling today? How is husband? Angels to Miz and when you get home from work, put on your Barbara B hoodie and your boat pants and hug your bear and that will be us hugging you back.
Peachie!!! REALLY getting worried. Crew, I left a message yesterday and am worried and hope that Peach and her husband are ok. C'mon Peach, let us know. We care and worry about you and you know that I care and love you and worry. Are you anywhere near that wildfire??
Larry is the OWNER of an assisted living center and it looks like he was answering a question a lady had about her sister with dementia or ALZ who no longer wanted her sister in her house. And the patient thought she was in her own house. I still say I got the dehumanizing part right.
That is still insane advice and only underscores my point on these 'pros' and how they don't know how to properly administer memory care. He should be reported to a governing organization that probably doesn't exsist. Would you want your mama with this cretin?
Ok.....finally made my way through the posts to find out why y'all are disgusted with Larry. I'm just gonna go run through a field of daisies after I do a "drive-by" at the nursing home....then I'm gonna have a banana split with a side of toothbrush...........................
Applause Applause Applause for Ted and Christina what wonderful poems you guys wrote..those were like...excellent man....veeeeeh...ah woooooosh. LOL
Larry's post did have the name of his care home at the bottom of his post. His flippin post to us sounded like a f()ckin add in the first place...and his answer was so clinically cold...sure it's easy to tell someone else wonder what Larry did with his own folks? I like the drop kick Larry idea as well as Jam's...excellent idea mamasita Rojo Jam. (rojo= red in espanol I think)
Christina big hugs and waffle day eh..hmmm maybe I should make some belgium waffles from the Krusteaz mix...mmm mmm good and no I won't put any pot in it...lol!
Well so glad I came here now, cause let me fricken tell you what happened to MOI this morning after last post. Well the HOSPICE social worker and the HOSPICE nurse where going to come together today and see me. The social worker for information about board and cares and NH'S in the vincinty and the nurse about the BIG FLIPPIN ISSUE I had about the meds I am supposed to give my mom to calm the sundowning. First off the flippin Hospice nurse which has been nice up till now was nice until yesterday she was getting dismissive and snippity about the meds, NO CLEAR FLIPPIN INFORMATION...she told the caregiver while I was out to the thrift shop drop off (oh yeah get back to that subject later for Lori)...and told the caregiver to give her a Thorazine glad she didn't cause I wanted to understand these flippin meds first, they did not explain ANYTHING...so I finally got to talk to her around 4 yesterday and she says snottily to me well you have to give her these meds early...well the fn bottle says as needed...she was so snotty..give her 2 halperdols and a thorazine...like no one ever explained these all these flippin bottles say as needed. So when they came by today the nurse went to see my mom and the social worker was giving me a brief and I mean brief rundown of information I thought I would get a lot more of oh well, then the nurse comes back and I don't know what happened but the BIT&H says to me...I GET THE FEELING YOU ARE RESISITING EVERYTHING WE ARE TYRING TO DO FOR YOU...I said what....? She says you did not check out the place I told you about...and I said well I know where it is but have not had the chance to go look at it, and then she spouts out about not giving her the meds..and I said I don't understand them they were not explained..and it escallated to where I gave that Bit&h what's what right in her face. WTF...they did not write out no med plan,what interacts with what,what they hell they each do. She finally got ticked and said she was going to write out the med plan in her car...what a baby, cause I gave her what's what and was not going to be talked to like that ...WTF...resisiting them...don't even know the hell she was talking about. So the social worker witnessed all of that and while the nurse sat in her car I told the social worker WTF was that about,I am right to understand these meds and there was NO MEDSHEET ANYWHERE for me...no one bothered to do it or explain..JUST IT WAS ORDERED AND DELIVERED...so it was there fault and I rubbed her nose BACK INTO IT..and I think that's why she got pissed. I have a good way of throwing FACTS back into someones face where they don't like it...so there. So after all that I had enough of everyone...called the caregiving service and cancelled the next stressfull thing which is the hard headed cleaning fanatic caregiver for today. I was so upset after that...I told the social worker I did not need that today at all...I was so upset...was until I came in here and it all went bye bye...thanks my lovelies my family!!!!
Okay Lori...you don't know how many bags I have taken to the thrift shop guy...my mom had tons and tons of clothes all packed away neatly with price tags...tons and tons of stuf...have tons of avon still in packages...anyone collect?
So it will be a quiet day just mom and me...when she wakes up she's going to get oatmeal and a thorazine and an ativan and we will take it from there.. the medsheet they made out was nuts...thorazine every 4 hours...she does not wake up from 1 is she nuts...oh then they went on about some other crisis service can c ome in and evaluate..at this point I want all you f()ckers gone at this point...all I needed was clear direction on meds and I can do the rest...FU all you so called caregiving professionals except Ladeeda!
lol...goood morning good morning hope you slep the whole night through good morning good morning to you.
hugs to all...stopped raining for now..heard more is coming Christina..
oh and one last note..go to QVC and check out item H89838 thinking about ordering that to put under my bed when I move it over here...mom's carpet is over 40 years old and it is a mottled red and orange...my mom liked orange..yelch....and on any carpet that was touched by feet is two inches than what is under the furniture trampled down by heavy german and austrian feet for over 40 years....so instead of doing the entire room over thought about putting that under my sleigh bed. What do you think..oh and Ivory is the color of choice...let me think my darlings...
you know after those hospice PEOPLE left this morning I cancelled my can=be stressful caregiver for the day for some peace and quiet and went into see my mom...I looked at her completly different and I was crying due to that Hospice nurse and what she put me through for no fn reason this morning..my mom saw I was crying but did nothing to console me, which is fine...I didn't need it. Last weekend I found some pictures of me and my mom from the late 80's and 90's hugging and smiling even though my mom has made my life hellish at times...I looked at those pics even though a month ago I saw like pictures elsewhere but I felt different..the compassion came back....I think I am going where Bobbie was at towards the end...I hugged my mom and stroked her hair and said I am going to take care of my good mommy today..and was sobbing...my mom even though nuts at times was a good mom afterall! So glad I have a quiet afternoon...I have Thorazine as SGT AT ARMS if need be...LOL...I am armed....lol!!!!
Hi Again All, Sounds like another crazy day. I am sooo excited because its friday and I am almost caught up with all my work AND my uncle is doing better. Lori, I'm sorry you have to work this weekend. I hope you find something that is worthwhile. I helped clean out my uncle's house and I found a photo of a great great uncle that was the spitting image of my father, only taller. I love it. Pirate it's good that you're looking out for your Mom and checking all her meds carefully. Too bad it had to be so difficult. Laleeda, thanks for being kind to Larry. Bobbi, thanks for being mean to Larry. ;)
There once was a Man named Larry Who did not miss a beat nor tarry, he hastened your mom along, and not even a song, to load her into the door, and then scurry.
hey not a bad limerick even though st patty's was last week, heck have one more slice of shepards pie in the fridge..yum
Oh Boy. TIA time for mom. we just spent the last 15 minutes discussing a face she is seeing out the window. I thought she meant that the bushes and things out there could be seen as a face, but she was saying that she sees a real face looking at her. not a person, just a face. not somebody she recognizes, she's not scared, just frustrated that I can't see it too.
Is this what I'm supposed to be giggling about Larry? cause i don't find it funny.
This morning mom said the clothes I got out for her were wet....well, they were a few minutes ago...she should have hollered for me then so I could feel them..they really were wet.
Did Larry's post get removed? I can't find it but doesn't sound like he's too popular.... Yikes! Oh Larry....., I'm sure you meant well but I'm afraid a belated St. Patty's Day boil on your butt is wished to you!! Enjoy!
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Most of us here are very seasoned caregivers, have many years experiance with our loved ones, and welcome new members with questions.
This thread is intended to be fun, loving, a place to vent, to laugh, to encourage. We respect each other and make ammends if we hurt someones feelings.
I encourge you to read as many posts on this thread as you can, to see that we are a tight knit group who care deeply for each other. We have more experiance with Alz/dem, than most people get in a lifetime.
So thank you for your post, hope you can join in the fun and read our posts in the vein they are intended. There is a world of love and support here, wish all caregiver knew about us, they would have an easier time with thier day to day tasks.
Spread the word about this sight, there is so much information available, so many resources many may not know about.
Thank you for being such a loving, kind example. How's your knee? Love you:)
Hey Ted, Lori, Pirate, et similar headcases (moi): I think I know what's going on. You now how when women WORK together they all have their PERIODS together? Yep. That's it.
Welcome, Ted, to one more thing you have to buy now.
Laugh and the world laughs with you, Cry on Grossed Out, and we all cry together. Except for the ones who are strong at the moment, and they lift us up.
I want it to be OUR turn again:)
You are ssoooo sweet. I could tell by Larry's post ( and I am new at this) that he was a professional. He may WORK with ALZ/Dementia but he does't CARE for them. Right? I've looked at some of the other theads where caregivers ask questions and they get ridiculous answers. I'm sure most of you deserve alphabet soup after your names just because of the experience you have. The job is not described in books. My knee jerk reaction is what i just THINK I'd like to say to the sis that just left. She was a school teacher......aaaaahhhhhh
My ex husband's name is Larry.......
Ladeeda!! You get the Welcome Award! Best welcome to a forgive them they know not what they do fng. congratulations and that was wonderful. thank you on behalf of everybody.
Christine!! You are a wonderful blend of Spiritual and Human and we love you. You are with God without shoving it down out throats. Thank you. On behalf of everybody.
The Israeli Army has women in barracks together and they cycle with each other due to the close environment and the sense of smell, believe it or not.....
Of course they are activated and attack while they are PMSing.
Alright the last part is bs, but the first part is true.
Selfish Siblings!! glad you like disembowel. I like saying certain words; the other day it was clam. Looks funny to me. It's always good to see you SS and I hope your journey is going as smoothy as possible.
Ted!! that's a great idea about the fairy tales. i like the one that you and Allshesgot came up with.
There was an old woman who sh!! in a shoe....
Hey, my mom dropped a duece in a wastebasket one time and I thought I was going to lose my mind.
Pirate!! so good to see you Sgt! Thanks for being here.
OK Larry!!
If you are a professional you won't EVER have the range of experience of these caregivers here. Personally i am on a campaign to educate professionals on the finer points of memory care because in my experience of meeting with and watching in action 'pro' caregivers, there is a huge point spread between what they are taught and the actual skills needed to do the job.
I expanded on this maybe a hundred or so posts past if you care to read about it.
If you are a familly caregiver, you simply are not at that point in your journey as many of the folks here. Yet.
The disease is progressive, no matter which form and this stuff will happen to you too. At that point you will realize that you are on poop patrol and we were on to something.
Aside from the poop.
Hope you check back and respond because the more pros and or family caregivers we can reach out to, the better the overall care will be for the patients, and the better the heath will be for the caregivers.
Larry, I did copy and paste a quote from you from your wall:
There's no convinsing someone who's memory grows smaller each day. You just have to search out the best assisted living home/center in your area and when you find the best her money can afford....make the move and know that you may have to sneak away. Sounds cruel but it is best for her and you. If she is diagnosed, she can't legally make any decisions. get a P.O.A. for her and fill it out, and Medical P.O.A. set it up with the home/center and pre-arrange to drop her off. The home/center will deal with her/help her settle in and you should talk with them and ask how long before you should visit. She probably has good and bad days...this is a preview of her next stage (the bad days).
Just do it and know it's best for all involved. Don't tell her she's moving, just a trip to visit someone.
Oct 8 2009 8:45 PM
"Just do it and know it's best for all involved. Don't tell her she's moving, just a trip to visit someone."
ARE YOU INSANE????
if you are indeed a professional, please tell us where so we can get you fired.
Crew: This is an example of not such a great welcome.
but for a good reason, In My Humble Opinion.
lovbob
Oh TED: Remember, it's Dementia, OK? OFD
BTW, Thank you, Bobbie, for the nice comp. This is my human side right now, if it wasn't obvious.
YEEHAW!!!!! WHOO HOO!!!!!!! OBM----L!!!!!!
oops. didn't mean to yell. I was still recovering. got my heart beating fast. gonna run errands now. Maybe without the car:)
Calmly and politely, I think larry's advice was cruel, disgusting, and dehumanizing. If I didn't have guilt before, that advice would give it to me. Whew!! I don't need to see that book!!
Lori! Nik and I have to go north and clean out mom's house, 3K sq ft, floor to ceiling. Dread doesn't even cover it..... Feel your pain sister. Oh, and plus a storage unit. omg....
Miz!! how are you feeling today? How is husband? Angels to Miz and when you get home from work, put on your Barbara B hoodie and your boat pants and hug your bear and that will be us hugging you back.
Peachie!!! REALLY getting worried. Crew, I left a message yesterday and am worried and hope that Peach and her husband are ok. C'mon Peach, let us know. We care and worry about you and you know that I care and love you and worry. Are you anywhere near that wildfire??
lovbob
He should be reported to a governing organization that probably doesn't exsist.
Would you want your mama with this cretin?
Seeme, you got it ALL right.
lovbob
Jam
Larry's post did have the name of his care home at the bottom of his post. His flippin post to us sounded like a f()ckin add in the first place...and his answer was so clinically cold...sure it's easy to tell someone else wonder what Larry did with his own folks? I like the drop kick Larry idea as well as Jam's...excellent idea mamasita Rojo Jam. (rojo= red in espanol I think)
Christina big hugs and waffle day eh..hmmm maybe I should make some belgium waffles from the Krusteaz mix...mmm mmm good and no I won't put any pot in it...lol!
Well so glad I came here now, cause let me fricken tell you what happened to MOI this morning after last post. Well the HOSPICE social worker and the HOSPICE nurse where going to come together today and see me. The social worker for information about board and cares and NH'S in the vincinty and the nurse about the BIG FLIPPIN ISSUE I had about the meds I am supposed to give my mom to calm the sundowning. First off the flippin Hospice nurse which has been nice up till now was nice until yesterday she was getting dismissive and snippity about the meds, NO CLEAR FLIPPIN INFORMATION...she told the caregiver while I was out to the thrift shop drop off (oh yeah get back to that subject later for Lori)...and told the caregiver to give her a Thorazine glad she didn't cause I wanted to understand these flippin meds first, they did not explain ANYTHING...so I finally got to talk to her around 4 yesterday and she says snottily to me well you have to give her these meds early...well the fn bottle says as needed...she was so snotty..give her 2 halperdols and a thorazine...like no one ever explained these all these flippin bottles say as needed. So when they came by today the nurse went to see my mom and the social worker was giving me a brief and I mean brief rundown of information I thought I would get a lot more of oh well, then the nurse comes back and I don't know what happened but the BIT&H says to me...I GET THE FEELING YOU ARE RESISITING EVERYTHING WE ARE TYRING TO DO FOR YOU...I said what....? She says you did not check out the place I told you about...and I said well I know where it is but have not had the chance to go look at it, and then she spouts out about not giving her the meds..and I said I don't understand them they were not explained..and it escallated to where I gave that Bit&h what's what right in her face. WTF...they did not write out no med plan,what interacts with what,what they hell they each do. She finally got ticked and said she was going to write out the med plan in her car...what a baby, cause I gave her what's what and was not going to be talked to like that ...WTF...resisiting them...don't even know the hell she was talking about. So the social worker witnessed all of that and while the nurse sat in her car I told the social worker WTF was that about,I am right to understand these meds and there was NO MEDSHEET ANYWHERE for me...no one bothered to do it or explain..JUST IT WAS ORDERED AND DELIVERED...so it was there fault and I rubbed her nose BACK INTO IT..and I think that's why she got pissed. I have a good way of throwing FACTS back into someones face where they don't like it...so there. So after all that I had enough of everyone...called the caregiving service and cancelled the next stressfull thing which is the hard headed cleaning fanatic caregiver for today. I was so upset after that...I told the social worker I did not need that today at all...I was so upset...was until I came in here and it all went bye bye...thanks my lovelies my family!!!!
Okay Lori...you don't know how many bags I have taken to the thrift shop guy...my mom had tons and tons of clothes all packed away neatly with price tags...tons and tons of stuf...have tons of avon still in packages...anyone collect?
So it will be a quiet day just mom and me...when she wakes up she's going to get oatmeal and a thorazine and an ativan and we will take it from there.. the medsheet they made out was nuts...thorazine every 4 hours...she does not wake up from 1 is she nuts...oh then they went on about some other crisis service can c ome in and evaluate..at this point I want all you f()ckers gone at this point...all I needed was clear direction on meds and I can do the rest...FU all you so called caregiving professionals except Ladeeda!
lol...goood morning good morning hope you slep the whole night through good morning good morning to you.
hugs to all...stopped raining for now..heard more is coming Christina..
oh and one last note..go to QVC and check out item H89838 thinking about ordering that to put under my bed when I move it over here...mom's carpet is over 40 years old and it is a mottled red and orange...my mom liked orange..yelch....and on any carpet that was touched by feet is two inches than what is under the furniture trampled down by heavy german and austrian feet for over 40 years....so instead of doing the entire room over thought about putting that under my sleigh bed. What do you think..oh and Ivory is the color of choice...let me think my darlings...
veeeeeh.....ah...woooooosh! wink...LOL
come Larry One HIt wonder want a hit?
Lori, I'm sorry you have to work this weekend. I hope you find something that is worthwhile. I helped clean out my uncle's house and I found a photo of a great great uncle that was the spitting image of my father, only taller. I love it.
Pirate it's good that you're looking out for your Mom and checking all her meds carefully. Too bad it had to be so difficult.
Laleeda, thanks for being kind to Larry.
Bobbi, thanks for being mean to Larry.
;)
There once was a Man named Larry
Who did not miss a beat nor tarry,
he hastened your mom along,
and not even a song,
to load her into the door,
and then scurry.
hey not a bad limerick even though st patty's was last week, heck have one more slice of shepards pie in the fridge..yum
Is this what I'm supposed to be giggling about Larry? cause i don't find it funny.
Hugs,
Sue
I love your icon. It's how I feel most mornings! Meow!