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V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Not that I'm happy you all get grossed out by your mothers, but it makes me feel a bit more normal about being grossed out by mine. I can't watch my mother eat, either. And dread the morning potty emptying ritual. I have a sister who does none of this so I am kind of resentful. Does anyone else have siblings who stay away like you have the plague?
My husband says we should get a bell to put around Mother's neck, or around her ankle. Like a cat. She couldn't get far or make her way to the front door, but she cannot see and would fall. Ted, are you still able to leave your Mom and go out? Does not sound like it.
Bobbie, I'm sorry I said you were being 'mean.' The short time I have been on here, I've gotten the impression that you are like a mama bear protecting her cubs. Now I know that isn't exactly the right analogy since some of us are older... For me Larry's post hit a cord, on so many levels it bugged me. Although his 'giggle' advice did make me think he may have a softer side.
To All, I hope everyone has a good day today...no major mishaps...peace.. etc.
Christina, No, I can't leave her anymore, i spoke to her CNA about it this morning and we agreed it's time I find a part time caregiving to help. don't know how I'm gonna pay for it but I simply can't expect myself to stay here all the time.
Care, larry's giggle remark made me sick. but i guess I'm past the point of finding any of this cute anymore. I'm sure it's just my own attitude but that's the way it is.
I'm with you, Bro. It's kind of like when a baby throws their food on the floor. The first time it's cute, and you laugh. I think we must look at the mess with as much humor as we can, but everything comes in waves, and as their circumstance progresses, our attitude and perspective changes, too. I think we've said all that can be said about the Stooge, and we certainly know 'they' are out there. This week several people "out in the world" remarked that I looked tired. First, thank you so much--it's my new eye shadow. Secondly, when I tell them I sometimes don't sleep because I take care of my Mother--the yada yada part is less and less, because I am tired, and of explaining. If one more person says, flippantly, "Oh, it's just like taking care of a baby", I'm going to say, "Yes, but I didn't have as much fun getting here". {{{hugs}}
Good Morning.....just checking in, it's going to be a quiet day today I HOPE!
austin........yes the col is evolving on a daily basis and it's already wearing me down and I cannot allow that to happen now or I will have a hard time dealing with her in the future.
I'm still a little miffed at her about her behavior with the hot rollers. Apparently she considers rolling her hair up her "hobby"....so after taking them away, hubby did that, he says I should buy her new ones, give them to her in a month, and just let her play her little girls game of make-up and hair. I wish I could post a pic of the nasty things she's been using. The plastic lid is cracked and broken off and caked on the inside with hairspray. Each roller has a felt liner and is completely covered in a dried layer of gray hair and hairspray and the felt has burned off in places; the clips have a layer of nasty hairspray coated over them. I've given up trying to explain what a perm is for and how hot rollers do not "set" a perm. F..k it! My biggest concern was the damn thing that heats the rollers shorting out because of all the hair and spray on it, causing a house fire, her burning herself, or I found the plug one day lying in a puddle of water.....she would have picked it up and just plugged it in.............ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ.......wow that would have been a real frizzy perm! I told hubby that if I have to buy more hot rollers.....that's it, she will no longer go to the salon unless he wants to take her. It took me 1/2 hr to get my hair cut the other day.....and I'm sorry to say that I resent the fact that I sat the whole damn day with her so she could look pretty only to have her destroy all that work with hot rollers, to say nothing of the $137 it cost her. And she will go back to looking like an overgrown mop. She will not take suggestions on how to "do" her hair....hubby said last night ....it's like telling a 2 y/o no, except you can't spank her or put her in time out. He tried to talk to her the other night about getting her front teeth fixed and she absolutely refused. She is so vain about make-up and hair, but her 2 front teeth are black are crumbling off from where she has fallen, and you can't see them now when she smiles. She looks awful and her breath would stop a gut-wagon. I know what the problem is, she is embarrassed for someone else to see that, just like when I stood over her while the doctor trimmed her toe nails....she told me she was so embarrassed, but yet she will let her teeth go and won't touch the back of her hair with a brush, but by golly that mascara will be globbed on and there will be curls on the side of her head. I told her the other day to not wear this little denim jacket thing she likes to wear.....she splattered bleach on it sometime or another and took a black magic marker and colored in the spots....geez. Guess what she wore? She has a closet full of clothes that I helped her buy on-line, she picked them all out, but she won't wear them...."I'm saving them for a special day".....you might not have one of those, wear the damn clothes!
Thank you for listening and letting me get this off my chest....I can't tell hubby his mother is driving me crazy to the point I don't like her sometimes. There are some days when I envision what it would be like to put her in a nh and then I wake up to reality again.
Vegas in 10 days.....................I so need it!
Rain and freezing rain here today......hope all my pretty daffodils can take it.
Jam--I completely relate! My mother's dentures are falling apart and she will NOT get new ones because she might die and it would be a waste of money. Meanwhile, I have to cook whole separate meals for her so she doesn't choke on something she can't chew!! And the clothes...my mother has a bulging closet full of clothes she also won't wear because she's saving them for a special occasion. It's a special occasion every time a 91 yr old woman wakes up in the morning, for pete's sake! AND my mother insists on buying clothes in size extra large or 16. She is 5'5" and weighs 117 pounds! And I cannot talk her into buying anything smaller!
I hope you enjoy Vegas. You certainly do deserve it!
I feel your pain! I had no clue about the toothbrush thing. I need to put all the toothbrushes in the drawer-in the bathroom- so they do not turn into a hairbrush! My 7 yr old has her own drawer for her stuff & I get grossed out when the used toilet paper is in the drawer or even put in the trash-then the bathroom completely stinks! Why not flush?
Hey crew... it's been awhile, wanted to share what I did for mother not opening the door and really inexpensive. When I was packing Christmas items away I saved two of our Christmas bells (four on each) that were hanging up and they now are on the front door and back side door. Anythime someone opens or closes you can hear them jingle! LOL anything to save a buck!!! :) hope all have some "private time" tonight.. miss you all, bj
I was just thinking, when I was working and taking doing my physical therapy thing with patients in nursing homes, homes, and outpatient, that it is so much easier to be pleasant and upbeat with a "stranger" than it is to be with a relative, in my case, my mother. I have gotten to the stage in the A Bomb where she and I have turned the corner from resentment to love and lightness, most of the time, but it took a long freaking time to get to this point. Not sure what the point of my story is , but just thought I'd share a thought. hope all are OK today. ssk K? Oh by the way , I had a glass of wine.
dory.....you got it! the col's clothes are falling off of her....I made her buy medium in everything, which made her mad at the time, but now they are getting too big. When she has gone out to buy something she thinks she has to buy 1x because she is so big...... and she REFUSES to wear anything except strapless bras and the last time she bought some she bought too small....so guess what? They are usually down around her waist, but by golly we have to wear it! And no her little boobs aren't in it...:) So far today she has been very quiet....got her bath done and yes I am now having to physically give her the morning meds and watch her swallow them, just like the nighttime meds. She didn't say a word about the hot rollers...knock on wood.
Hey, folks-- I've been on a kindle food thread most of the time today getting easy recipes for dinners. Woke up every 1-2 hrs last night. At 4:30 mom wanted to get dressed. I said go ahead and went back to sleep. If you tell her what time it is, she still doesn't know if it day or night when she is in her bedrrom. And the clothes--she is only 124 lbs, her legs look like bird legs but her gut is a 12. She still insists on 10. So I buy bigger pants, cut the tags out, tell her they used to be mine, then she wears them. Whatever. Now she is on the bathroom kick. Another day of 50 trips to the bathroom. No wonder her rhoids hurt. She gets something in her head like that or taxes, or a haircut or dishes or a dress and will worry you to death about it for months. She really can worry a blister on a brick. I have constant headaches from tension and I love her to pieces, but...enough!
Have we got more newbies here like Dory and Amreed or not?
Hey, Ted....are you a real Southern gent or a transplant? I'm a damn Yankee cause I stayed. But I did come from "southern" Illinois. lol
Ted, hubby got some great alarms at Dollar Tree. It is a loud alarm sound. Would scare away a burglar and would definitely wake you up. Sometimes we forget to shut it off and it scares the bejeebers out of hubby. And, they were cheap!!
Miz - I'm from the area around St. Louis - about 20 mi east. We call it southern, but not as far south as Cairo. Used to have relatives around Christopher.
Well,my mom seems to have awakened like a bear in hibernation. She's talking some and is alert. Wish i could just go out and be normal. maybe some other time.
Austin, austin.. how was your date? Reason, I'm asking, is I also want to have someone in my life. but how to meet him when i'm in the house all the time. I'll just have to arrange the first meeting at my house. All of you married "bitches" don't know how hard is to go it alone . Actually, some aspects are easier,, I can do what I want when I want If i want. But it's a lonely time, for sure. My Mom, by the way, is doing really well. good fing night,
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Thanks Kat!
Ted, are you still able to leave your Mom and go out? Does not sound like it.
To All, I hope everyone has a good day today...no major mishaps...peace.. etc.
Care, larry's giggle remark made me sick. but i guess I'm past the point of finding any of this cute anymore. I'm sure it's just my own attitude but that's the way it is.
This week several people "out in the world" remarked that I looked tired. First, thank you so much--it's my new eye shadow.
Secondly, when I tell them I sometimes don't sleep because I take care of my Mother--the yada yada part is less and less, because I am tired, and of explaining. If one more person says, flippantly, "Oh, it's just like taking care of a baby", I'm going to say, "Yes, but I didn't have as much fun getting here". {{{hugs}}
austin........yes the col is evolving on a daily basis and it's already wearing me down and I cannot allow that to happen now or I will have a hard time dealing with her in the future.
I'm still a little miffed at her about her behavior with the hot rollers. Apparently she considers rolling her hair up her "hobby"....so after taking them away, hubby did that, he says I should buy her new ones, give them to her in a month, and just let her play her little girls game of make-up and hair. I wish I could post a pic of the nasty things she's been using. The plastic lid is cracked and broken off and caked on the inside with hairspray. Each roller has a felt liner and is completely covered in a dried layer of gray hair and hairspray and the felt has burned off in places; the clips have a layer of nasty hairspray coated over them. I've given up trying to explain what a perm is for and how hot rollers do not "set" a perm. F..k it! My biggest concern was the damn thing that heats the rollers shorting out because of all the hair and spray on it, causing a house fire, her burning herself, or I found the plug one day lying in a puddle of water.....she would have picked it up and just plugged it in.............ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ.......wow that would have been a real frizzy perm! I told hubby that if I have to buy more hot rollers.....that's it, she will no longer go to the salon unless he wants to take her. It took me 1/2 hr to get my hair cut the other day.....and I'm sorry to say that I resent the fact that I sat the whole damn day with her so she could look pretty only to have her destroy all that work with hot rollers, to say nothing of the $137 it cost her. And she will go back to looking like an overgrown mop. She will not take suggestions on how to "do" her hair....hubby said last night ....it's like telling a 2 y/o no, except you can't spank her or put her in time out. He tried to talk to her the other night about getting her front teeth fixed and she absolutely refused. She is so vain about make-up and hair, but her 2 front teeth are black are crumbling off from where she has fallen, and you can't see them now when she smiles. She looks awful and her breath would stop a gut-wagon. I know what the problem is, she is embarrassed for someone else to see that, just like when I stood over her while the doctor trimmed her toe nails....she told me she was so embarrassed, but yet she will let her teeth go and won't touch the back of her hair with a brush, but by golly that mascara will be globbed on and there will be curls on the side of her head. I told her the other day to not wear this little denim jacket thing she likes to wear.....she splattered bleach on it sometime or another and took a black magic marker and colored in the spots....geez. Guess what she wore? She has a closet full of clothes that I helped her buy on-line, she picked them all out, but she won't wear them...."I'm saving them for a special day".....you might not have one of those, wear the damn clothes!
Thank you for listening and letting me get this off my chest....I can't tell hubby his mother is driving me crazy to the point I don't like her sometimes. There are some days when I envision what it would be like to put her in a nh and then I wake up to reality again.
Vegas in 10 days.....................I so need it!
Rain and freezing rain here today......hope all my pretty daffodils can take it.
Love and Hugz to all!
Jam
I hope you enjoy Vegas. You certainly do deserve it!
Dory
Love and Hugz to all!
Jam
I've been on a kindle food thread most of the time today getting easy recipes for dinners. Woke up every 1-2 hrs last night. At 4:30 mom wanted to get dressed. I said go ahead and went back to sleep. If you tell her what time it is, she still doesn't know if it day or night when she is in her bedrrom. And the clothes--she is only 124 lbs, her legs look like bird legs but her gut is a 12. She still insists on 10. So I buy bigger pants, cut the tags out, tell her they used to be mine, then she wears them. Whatever. Now she is on the bathroom kick. Another day of 50 trips to the bathroom. No wonder her rhoids hurt. She gets something in her head like that or taxes, or a haircut or dishes or a dress and will worry you to death about it for months. She really can worry a blister on a brick. I have constant headaches from tension and I love her to pieces, but...enough!
Have we got more newbies here like Dory and Amreed or not?
Hey, Ted....are you a real Southern gent or a transplant? I'm a damn Yankee cause I stayed. But I did come from "southern" Illinois. lol
Bless my heart.
good fing night,