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V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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I thank God for folks like you and your loving ways with your children. Please don't ever stop and continue to be kind when you are elderly. I didn't have that opportunity as a child or as an adult. Having become a caregiver to my Mother now is an experience that I was totally unprepared for. She on the other hand is having great fun with it and me. If a person has been sinful and wicked thier whole life; you can't very well ask them to change at 90. It breaks my heart daily but I'm hanging in there and trying to do all as I would for the Lord.
My beloved Mama left us at 12:08 pm East Coast time.
She died in her own home and in her own bed holding my hand and looking straight into my eyes with her beautiful blue eyes.
I told her how beautiful she was and how many people's lives she had influenced. I thanked her for being my mama and told her I was sorry for all the bad stuff I did. She was struggling for breath and I asked her if she saw Daddy. Her breathing became less labored and i told her it's ok. Go with Daddy. And she did.
Oh Bobbie, I am just in tears....! Be strong be brave, I know it is hard. WE are here with you. I am sure you will be with all of us when we go through the same thing. You did good! I will think of you all day and eve! I can't stop crying for you right now. Peace be with you right now.
Oh my Bobbie. Something guided me to this thread today because I was on this site all day yesterday and didn't touch this thread.
I am amazed at the fact that you were able to be there with your mom as she transcended, you were truly there at the very end and that must make you feel wonderful knowing that. You've lived my dream and although I feel sadness, I also rejoice for you. What a daughter you've been and what inspiration you've given to me.
Go ahead and take the time that you need, we'll be right here for you.
God bless you sweet Bobbie. I am so sorry for your loss, as I know it must grieve you something fierce. Praying the Lord comfort you at this time. Sis, I will keep you in my heart and prayers, and wish I could do more. Could you post some memorial info, so we can get in touch with you, or attend, if possible? If there's anything I could do to help, please know I will. Love you, sweet lady, SS
Oh Bobbie. I am so very sorry. I too am in tears as I write this. It just breaks my heart for you. You have been there for her and with her and if the end had to come it came in the right way. I wish I could hug you. I'm sending a big long hug to you. Take good care. Please let us know how you are doing. So much love to you.
Dear Bobbie, I am indeed sorry to hear of your loss. I hope that you can take comfort in the fact that you were not only there for your mom's passing, but there for her living as well. I can only imagine how hard it was for you. Take care of yourself.
oh bobbie321 , im bawling ! i kept thinkin she be like dad , be sickone day and be well next day . i am so so sorry for ur loss ! im huging u right now long and hard big bear hug ! so so sorry . i gotta go i cant even read , im bawlin so hard . xoxoxoxox
I was so incredibly saddened to hear about your mother's passing. I know there is nothing I can say right now to comfort you in your grief. Your mom knew it was soon why she made you get the boat. She wanted you to have something to focus on and to find comfort in. She was preparing you for what she felt. She was very grateful for your bringing her home and her preparing you was her way to thank you. The Barbara B will be you tangible memorial to you mother.
You are a wonderful person and you gave your mother the best gift of all, her home to die in with dignity and your love.
Bobbie, I have not been on this site for very long but ebery time I read about you and your mom it was like I had just read a wonderful story and now it has had a wonderful new beginning for her. You bid her good-bye but just for a while and she will be able to greet you when you join her someday! What a wonderful journey you had and I really admire your strength, determination and perseverance, Hugs to you! Love, Teri
Bobbie, I just read about your mother. I'm so sorry for your loss, I know you are heartbroken. Being with her at the end is something you will never forget. You got to say goodbye and that will always be special. My prayers are with you.
I will know the time and place tomorrow and I will let you all know.
Your words have brought me great comfort and I will continue to post here because what we all have learned we know that we must share with others who are facing the same challenges.
I will be here for you as you all have been here for me. I thank you again from the bottom of my heart.
Mama died in peace and not in pain and one day I will tell the whole story when we are on her namesake boat. A beautiful symbol of her love.
My mama is gone and I am still in shock and can't stop crying.
I just left dad at the nursing home, and I am choking back sobs. He didn't get up for breakfast. He was still in his pajamas at noon, and shows no sign of doing anything but laying around and sleeping. Actually, he was sitting up when I got there, but lay down not long after. He tried to speak, but the sentences are so garbled, and not an intelligible sound comes out. Waaaaa. My FIL is just down the hall, and doing better at 90 than my dad at 77. Seems dad is just not going to bounce back after his recent fall the other day. I tried to have conversation with him, and he just shakes his head, sometimes yes, sometimes no. I told him, pointing to me, then to him, I love you. I held his hand. I asked if he wanted to get up and go to lunch. Clearly that won't be happening. I asked him to go for a ride in my car with me. That will probably never happen again.
Watching them decline is heartbreaking. I left feeling quite numb. I hate Alzheimer's. Rumor has it that my sister will be here this weekend, for the first time in a year. Good. She needs to see how he's doing. Ever heard of the book, "The Long Goodbye"? That's what I feel we're doing...and watching it right before our eyes. This is so hard.
SS, I'm so sorry about your dad. It IS heartbreaking. You're a good daughter to be there for him even though it is so difficult. I know you wouldn't do it any other way because you are a kind and gentle person. You're right. Your sister needs to see your dad and see what you have been dealing with. I'm so glad we have this site to express our sadness and frustrations. Love you, sweetie. Hang in there.
I'm sorry that your dad is not bouncing back as you have hoped,but never say never.I hate cancer and lawyers,but your commit about your dad being so much younger than your father- in- law is kinda how it was with me.My mate barely in his 40's passed away before my dad in his 80's,no one saw that one coming,he was the healthest looking one of every body,never missed work, never had a cold,never was sick,not over weight,didn',t smoke,did yoga,worked out,seemed to be fit as a fiddle, then that wretched cancer ruined everything. I hope your sister will be a positive instead of more stress.I'm sure your son is your best stress relief,mine is-a little joy that keeps on giving. Some people think without the bad, one couldn't appreciate the good,that it some how is a balance of nature,I think about that quiet a bit. We're off to taekwondo,not karate, daughter told me its not the same thing and correct the information I gave you earlier.What belt is your son at.I hope your dad improves.
Booobbbbbiiiieeeeeee --- gosh you got me crying again....and that's tough at work...fighting back tears. I just called over at mom's to check up on her and going after work. It is tough to seem them decline...but what I keep telling myself..that is the way of life and it comes to every living thing. We have to do the best we can.
Tenn....your sister should have been coming all along...I don't understand people who don't want anything to do with their folks...even if they were not the best of friends. I can see some that had seriously abusive parents and not wanting anything to do with them, but that's another story. I would feel awfully guilty if I was not there for my parents in the end.
I just got off the phone with my Significant Other and he informed me that he will not be attending my mom's funeral. (I pay for tix) When I said, Gee that's ok, my then husband in '93 didn't come to my dad's funeral either, my SO said 'I'm not going to be guilted into it.' Wow. The hits keep on coming. Mom has been dead for not even 28 hours and this is how he treats me. I am so sad to begin with mama dying, my aunt/birthmother being a b!!ch to me and now this. I guess that this is a season of losses and I just have to suck it up and deal. I'm so retarded i actually thought that your husband stands next to you when you suffer a loss. Silly me.
Thank all of you for your beautiful hugs on my wall. You caregivers are more family to me than anyone I know and I truly am grateful that I have come to know you all. I would love to know you all better and meet SS's son and Tennessee's daughter and all the rest of the Barbara Bee's crew. We will sail together soon.
Stay strong and I'm trying to take my own advice here but man, I didn't expect this one. I told him 2 weeks ago that I would need him so badly when it happened but I guess it doesn't matter now. He was good to mom and that is what I will choose to remember.
Bobbie, that is f---- up.I know my daughter got bashed [by some] for using the word selfish,but that is beyond selfish.Again some people do not know how to do the right thing for family,Is work the excuse?
I'm sorry, bobbie, but that's inexcusable. He should be right there by your side helping you through ALL of this. Men are so damn weak sometimes...or something else. I'm so sorry he's being this way. Love ya.
Bobbie, that is incredible...that your SO should show his colors at this time. What a creep! So sorry for you, my friend. Wish I could be there for you this minute. Wow, it almost baffles the mind.
wow . id say we kick his hindend over board ! feed it to the sharks ! i am so sorry bobbie321 . husband and wife s suppose to be together on times like this . remebere that we are there for you . in ur mind u just picture us all there by urside ok . after when all this is over and you go back home to ur husband i hope and pray that there wont be any conflits , i know in my heart it wont be the same . youre gonna need a good close friend to lean on . plz remeber us all ur sailors . bless your heart ! we love you bobbie ! xoxoxo
You guys are the best! He must have heard you all because he just now called me and told me that he will be here! He apologized for his actions and said (about himself): Sometimes I'm such a douche and I'm sorry.
I feel so much better because like Linda said, it would have never been the same again and I was ready to be alone afterwards than to be with someone who left me alone when I needed him.
this is indeed an emotional roller coaster and thanks Sailors for your support. His ears must have been ringin all the way out there in Cali because he's 'on board' now complete with apologies and him saying about himself: 'what's wrong with me that I would say that to you?'
I actually thought about telling him to call up Tennessee's daughter and she could tell him precisely where the problem lay!
Grief hits in different ways and like I said he was very good to my mom and maybe that might have been part of it... straight up denial that she's gone. I forgive him because he's going to do the right thing, but boy... I was ready to set sail alone!
Ya'll are a family to me and thanks once again for your support. It seems like he's back in his right mind and he will stand beside me and mom. Whew. could have done without that little drama.
Sara and I are alone in the house and we've both been sleeping because the last few days were so awful and exhausting. I'm so sad I keep going into mom's room and laying on her bed and hugging her pillow and crying.
Ow. my mama is gone.
Thank you my sisters and little sister too for being here for me. omg I hope I can be there for you guys too. I know that you all are going through the trials of Hades and please know that I think of you all constantly and look forward to seeing us all together in the future.
SS Sorry about your father. I hate the diease so much myslef. I had went outside today for a few minutes and when I came in found my mom inher room on the floor. She had fell but did not know how she fell. Wasn't sure what to do so I am keeping her at home and just watching her. She has gone thru every part of her left side hurting. Besides what can the hospital do. Because I am like bobbie I would like my mom to be at home with me when it is her time to go. God bless to all
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Hope you are all having a wonderful week, and things are going well for you and your loved ones.
She died in her own home and in her own bed holding my hand and looking straight into my eyes with her beautiful blue eyes.
I told her how beautiful she was and how many people's lives she had influenced. I thanked her for being my mama and told her I was sorry for all the bad stuff I did. She was struggling for breath and I asked her if she saw Daddy. Her breathing became less labored and i told her it's ok. Go with Daddy. And she did.
Indeed I am heartbroken.
Thank you my sisters in grief.
lovbob
orphan
I am amazed at the fact that you were able to be there with your mom as she transcended, you were truly there at the very end and that must make you feel wonderful knowing that. You've lived my dream and although I feel sadness, I also rejoice for you. What a daughter you've been and what inspiration you've given to me.
Go ahead and take the time that you need, we'll be right here for you.
Love and so much respect to you Bobbie.....Pam
miz
I am indeed sorry to hear of your loss. I hope that you can take comfort in the fact that you were not only there for your mom's passing, but there for her living as well. I can only imagine how hard it was for you. Take care of yourself.
im huging u right now long and hard big bear hug ! so so sorry .
i gotta go i cant even read , im bawlin so hard . xoxoxoxox
I was so incredibly saddened to hear about your mother's passing. I know there is nothing I can say right now to comfort you in your grief. Your mom knew it was soon why she made you get the boat. She wanted you to have something to focus on and to find comfort in. She was preparing you for what she felt. She was very grateful for your bringing her home and her preparing you was her way to thank you. The Barbara B will be you tangible memorial to you mother.
You are a wonderful person and you gave your mother the best gift of all, her home to die in with dignity and your love.
We will all be here for you when you are ready.
Diane
I have not been on this site for very long but ebery time I read about you and your mom it was like I had just read a wonderful story and now it has had a wonderful new beginning for her. You bid her good-bye but just for a while and she will be able to greet you when you join her someday!
What a wonderful journey you had and I really admire your strength, determination and perseverance, Hugs to you!
Love,
Teri
I will know the time and place tomorrow and I will let you all know.
Your words have brought me great comfort and I will continue to post here because what we all have learned we know that we must share with others who are facing the same challenges.
I will be here for you as you all have been here for me. I thank you again from the bottom of my heart.
Mama died in peace and not in pain and one day I will tell the whole story when we are on her namesake boat. A beautiful symbol of her love.
My mama is gone and I am still in shock and can't stop crying.
lovbob
Watching them decline is heartbreaking. I left feeling quite numb. I hate Alzheimer's. Rumor has it that my sister will be here this weekend, for the first time in a year. Good. She needs to see how he's doing. Ever heard of the book, "The Long Goodbye"? That's what I feel we're doing...and watching it right before our eyes. This is so hard.
love,
miz
Tenn....your sister should have been coming all along...I don't understand people who don't want anything to do with their folks...even if they were not the best of friends. I can see some that had seriously abusive parents and not wanting anything to do with them, but that's another story. I would feel awfully guilty if I was not there for my parents in the end.
I just got off the phone with my Significant Other and he informed me that he will not be attending my mom's funeral. (I pay for tix) When I said, Gee that's ok, my then husband in '93 didn't come to my dad's funeral either, my SO said 'I'm not going to be guilted into it.'
Wow. The hits keep on coming. Mom has been dead for not even 28 hours and this is how he treats me. I am so sad to begin with mama dying, my aunt/birthmother being a b!!ch to me and now this.
I guess that this is a season of losses and I just have to suck it up and deal.
I'm so retarded i actually thought that your husband stands next to you when you suffer a loss. Silly me.
Thank all of you for your beautiful hugs on my wall. You caregivers are more family to me than anyone I know and I truly am grateful that I have come to know you all. I would love to know you all better and meet SS's son and Tennessee's daughter and all the rest of the Barbara Bee's crew. We will sail together soon.
Stay strong and I'm trying to take my own advice here but man, I didn't expect this one. I told him 2 weeks ago that I would need him so badly when it happened but I guess it doesn't matter now. He was good to mom and that is what I will choose to remember.
thanks for listening,
lovbob
miz
i am so sorry bobbie321 . husband and wife s suppose to be together on times like this .
remebere that we are there for you . in ur mind u just picture us all there by urside ok .
after when all this is over and you go back home to ur husband i hope and pray that there wont be any conflits , i know in my heart it wont be the same . youre gonna need a good close friend to lean on . plz remeber us all ur sailors .
bless your heart ! we love you bobbie ! xoxoxo
I feel so much better because like Linda said, it would have never been the same again and I was ready to be alone afterwards than to be with someone who left me alone when I needed him.
this is indeed an emotional roller coaster and thanks Sailors for your support. His ears must have been ringin all the way out there in Cali because he's 'on board' now complete with apologies and him saying about himself: 'what's wrong with me that I would say that to you?'
I actually thought about telling him to call up Tennessee's daughter and she could tell him precisely where the problem lay!
Grief hits in different ways and like I said he was very good to my mom and maybe that might have been part of it... straight up denial that she's gone. I forgive him because he's going to do the right thing, but boy... I was ready to set sail alone!
Ya'll are a family to me and thanks once again for your support. It seems like he's back in his right mind and he will stand beside me and mom. Whew. could have done without that little drama.
Sara and I are alone in the house and we've both been sleeping because the last few days were so awful and exhausting. I'm so sad I keep going into mom's room and laying on her bed and hugging her pillow and crying.
Ow. my mama is gone.
Thank you my sisters and little sister too for being here for me. omg I hope I can be there for you guys too. I know that you all are going through the trials of Hades and please know that I think of you all constantly and look forward to seeing us all together in the future.
with all my love,
Bobbie
Sorry about your father. I hate the diease so much myslef. I had went outside today for a few minutes and when I came in found my mom inher room on the floor. She had fell but did not know how she fell. Wasn't sure what to do so I am keeping her at home and just watching her. She has gone thru every part of her left side hurting. Besides what can the hospital do. Because I am like bobbie I would like my mom to be at home with me when it is her time to go.
God bless to all