Are you sure you want to exit? Your progress will be lost.
Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
✔
I acknowledge and authorize
✔
I consent to the collection of my consumer health data.*
✔
I consent to the sharing of my consumer health data with qualified home care agencies.*
*If I am consenting on behalf of someone else, I have the proper authorization to do so. By clicking Get My Results, you agree to our Privacy Policy. You also consent to receive calls and texts, which may be autodialed, from us and our customer communities. Your consent is not a condition to using our service. Please visit our Terms of Use. for information about our privacy practices.
Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
no sorry's Golf....I love outta control, but then I have had some of my posts deleted by AC Admin, oopSie. Okay I'm outta here to go watch a movie with guys.....now, where's my gas mask....bbl
Also, I buy my coconut from Tropical Traditions, although there are many companies who sell it. But, they have really good articles about research etc. and recipes too. You need to buy virgin and expellar pressed c.o.
Someone asked if it tastes like coconut. There are two kinds. One is flavored the other has no flavor at all. One of our forum members makes coconut chocolate candies by melting choclate chips and coconut oil together in the microwave and pouring them into ice cube trays...nyom, nyom.
For some, coconut oil can have a "drying" effect when used on the skin. I noticed this when I used in on my face. Crafters who make hand made soap often use coconut oil as a drying agent for people who have oily skin.
Others claim that c.o. also aids in weight loss...here's hoping!!
Phahahahaaa. hmmm flea bomb? If I could bottle it up, I'd send some to ya to try..... Plenty of that oooozzzzing around...
I'd just like to thank the academy and say how wonderful it is just to be nominated. I would also like to express my deep admiration for my fellow nominees... I am truly blessed....
Roselle ~ Oh, yes, it's definitely a true story. You just can't make up shit like that! And, if you like that one, I've got a million of them. My life might be hell, but it's sure not boring.
Golf ~ I wouldn't doubt that he will succeed one day in burning the house down. One of his OCD things is grilled cheese sandwiches. I'd always seemed to wake up when he did, but I didn't this one day. I awoke to the screech of the smoke detector. He decided to make himself a grilled cheese sandwich and melted two sticks of butter in a frying pan and apparently walked away from it, and it caught fire. Another time I went out to the garage to grab something from the garage freezer. I came back to find ashes on my new kitchen table and burn spots on the placemats, along with a horrible smell, which I found out was scorching in the microwave--you know that smell like when popcorn burns. He'd put three teabags on top of something plastic into the microwave, and the teabag staples arced and caught the teabags on fire, so he grabbed the firey mess and tossed it on the table. When I asked him what in the HELL he was doing, he said he thought he was making popcorn.
Believe me when I say I have to keep my eye on him EVERY SECOND.
I can laugh about it now. But I'm trying to keep from a meltdown right now. I visited Alan in the NH. this evening. He's in there for stroke rehab. This is the first time he didn't know me right away, and it came as a god awful shock. After a few minutes, he knew me. He previously has, for a few seconds, called me Karen or Ellen, his ex- and late wives. I seriously don't think I'll be able to handle it if it comes to the point when he completely doesn't recognize me.
On the upside, he's making significant physical progress.
Hi again, the movie was boring. Christine would be a great cruise director! fun fun fun!! Christine how about getting Antonio Banderas to sing to us? hell just get him for eye candy! Or Johnny Depp!! Meow!!!
A State Trooper was patrolling late at night off the main highway. He sees a couple in a car, with the interior light brightly glowing. He carefully approaches the car to get a closer look. Then he sees a young man behind the wheel, reading a computer magazine. He immediately notices a young woman in the rear seat, filing her fingernails. Puzzled by this surprising situation, the trooper walks to the car and gently raps on the driver's window.
The young man lowers his window. 'Uh, yes, Officer'? The trooper asks: 'What are you doing'? The young man says: 'Well, Officer, I'm reading a magazine. Pointing towards the young woman in the back seat the trooper says: 'And her, what is she doing'? The young man shrugs: 'Sir, I believe she's filing her fingernails. Now, the trooper is totally confused. A young couple, alone, in a car, at night in a lover's lane ... And nothing obscene is happening! The trooper asks: 'What's your age, young man'? The young man says: 'I'm 22, sir'. The trooper asks: 'And her, .... what's her age'? The young man looks at his watch and replies: 'She'll be 18 in 10 minutes..
Oh my Sheila... I guess you have to be very tired and always with the fire extinguisher in one hand. They are so creative... I think I already told that my mother found 2 syringes in my car (we had to use them to give her antibiotics) and she put them in the boots I use to walk the dogs. And when I put on the boots, I found the syringes... I am lucky they were still in the packaging. She makes huge messes when we go to a café (she puts ketchup in the coffee, 22 bags of sugar in her tea.... things like this, if you don't stop her). I know it is an obvious question, but did the doctors gave you a medicine to calm him down - a little bit? I know we couldn't live without the good old Seroquel. My mother is awake during the day but she is manageable... Let me know how you handle things!
Yes, Roselle, the last neurologist (I keep switching trying to find one I like) put him on Seroquel, but it didn't seem to make much difference. I asked her for something else or different, and she said I had to take him to a psychiatrist. I was in the process of finding a psychiatrist that specializes in Alzheimer's/dementia when he had his 3rd stroke. I didn't want to give him something that would make him less alert, but it's moot now, because he pretty much talks nonsense now. All of the people he talks about are those that he worked with 20 years ago as if they are currently in his life. Tonight most of the conversation was about our getting a new Chrysler, and whether several of those people are getting new Chryslers. I'll be following up with the psychiatrist from the NH he's in currently.
good mornin u all . stinks in here , dog smell , barf . i shall scrub and clean . waiting for hospices to get back here . pa s lookin good , perky perky . rossella - love ur new doggie . do u still have the other one that likes to destory ur house ? BANDIT #2 ? you al are so funny . manages to smile thru out all this . love you tons !! xoxo
G'morning all. We have sun today! Yeah!! Linda, Ro, Cricket, Chris, Cuz, JS, Bobbie, Lilli, Mis, SS, et al....you guys are quite the mates! I cast my vote for Christina as the Cruise Director. I think, Chris, you have to have a "Mike Night" regularly so that cuz can exercise his funny bone for all of us.
So much going on this week. Mom is really upset about the IH caregiver and say she wants her own home back to herself. But she did say she won't "kick her out" so I guess that's a good sign.
One of the VN's, an occupational therapist, told Mom they are concerned about her memory. I wish she hadn't said that. It's one of Mom's buttons - she now feels more paranoid that we are ALL watching all the "mistakes" she's making. It makes me feel very sad. I wish I could give her a hug but instead all I can do is try to cheer her up and eventually have to hang up the phone.
Finances are becoming an issue with Mom. She is paranoid about the checkbook - and she can't do the math very well. Mom was always math challenged so you can imagine how bad it is now. Unfortunately, I have to help her balance the checkbook on the phone. We use the speaker phone so she can have her hands free - and then she thinks I'm nearby so she points at things for me to "see". Sometimes, she holds things up to the window because she thinks I'm outside. It's so sad and horribly frustrating. By the time I hang up I'm ready for a stiff drink.
Oh, Chris, to answer your question, my lens is pretty good. I go back to the specialist on Tuesday for a "new and improved" version of the lens. I can actually see snowflakes again! With a little luck, she'll sign the form for the state so I can eventually start driving again. It may be a restricted license (no night driving) but I can live with that.
I'm seething this mornning. The contractor called and won't get here today. The contents of the cabinets are all over the dining room side boards and whatever flat surfaces I found. It's going to be this way until the job is finished "sometime next week". URRRRGGGG
This day just keeps getting better. I have to go over the bank statement with Mom over the phone. I'll procrastinate for an hour or so and then have to bite the bullet and make the call. I'll check back here later today for a dose of reality and some laughs. xoxoxox Love you all! Bee
Good morning. What a cute puppy Rosella. My mom's name is Dorothy! What breed is she? Linda, I'm sorry you are going through all this. I'm new here but I see you have a powerful support system. Prayers to you and Pa. I'm sorry everyones going through this. Sheila, I hope I didn't offend you with my post last night....your story just hit my tickle bone and I needed a good laugh. But I know it is not funny. BYW, I just saw a movie or show where they made grilled cheese with an iron instead of a stove.
Speaking of Happiness: Henry David Thoreau said: "Happiness is like a butterfly, The more you chase it, the more it eludes you; but if you turn your attention to other things, it comes and sits softly on your shoulder." I did not know it was he who coined that particular phrase, but I remembered a similar verse from the 70s. It is an form of psychology that seems to work for many things in life, and I think I used that example a while back, writing about something. Does that make me a plagiarist? Now I am feeling guilty. What you don't know can't hurt you. Like if you don't know something is wrong, then are you innocent? Ah Ha!!! got you thinking . You thought I was going to be serious. Nope. I found a good quote about boats and optimism this morning: Zig Ziglar, one of my most favorite motivational speakers said: "I'm so optimistic, I'd go after Moby Dick in a row boat and take the tartar sauce with me." All I could think was , EWwww!!! Ewwwwww! No tuna for me today!!! But I eat it plain, no mayo or anything but a little lemon juice and romaine. I should weigh 120 by now, but I don't, so another day of trying, another day of doing my best, waiting for school to start Monday. Cricket, I am practicing my affirmations everyday, all day: "The fat is melting away. I am fit, I am beautiful." Well, my mirror was laughing, but I did not let it get me down or run for the potato chips. haha I don't have any chips in the house:) It's another Unbelievable day on the southern left coast! Not as warm as yesterday--it was 78 at 4 pm. I've already been for my walk and taken Mother her Metamucil and prescriptions, but will visit her in afternoon, cause she sleeps every day after breakfast until after lunch! After the 2 rounds of antibiotics, it is weird how she is so much better?! I am grateful. Caroly, my house is torn up too, but now as much as yours. Next week we have the hot water rerouted through the walls, new floor in family room, and dry wall and painting to be done. It's OK, because Hubby is a contractor and gets the best guys to do the work. so much dust. I'll run my air purifier and be at school, go to the library and read. Cute puppy, Rosella. Precious. I appreciate the love you all have for your puppies, as my cat and I run the other way. haha. My brother has a fantastic dog, but that's all he has. As children, we were not allowed to have dogs, so just as I was always alone, I learned to be more comfortable and learned to prefer no dogs, being alone. At this time, it is not something I want to embrace, but maybe someday. woof. Have a great day everyone! Oh no-- Cruise director? That is a lot of responsibility! Ok, let's get moving with some activities!! Let's head to the bar! Whoo Hoo! Love you girls, and a great Cuz. Hugs, Christina xo
Christina-I would also nominate you as most intuitive! I did sleep hard when I fell asleep Wednesday night! Thursday morning! Hannah is doing well with driving as long as she doesn't have PMS! When she has PMS and driving, she is the Wicked Witch of the Mid-West! I try to tell her she is too close to the edge and she gets this look on her face says nothing and starts driving faster! When I think about it it's hilarious, but there in the car........Terrifying!! Last night could not sleep even though Ron was home! Up and down watching I Love Lucy! Finally around 7am fell asleep! Ron just let me sleep! Noon when I got up! Yes Christina you should be nominated for director!
Cricket-I will take that nomination for most difficult Dad! Last night he was refusing to sign his Social Security check! I would ask him and he would give me the look and shake his head no and throw the pen down on the counter! Later he signed. Ron and I told him we can't afford to pay for his Meds and other needs out of pocket! He refused to give me power of attorney a long time ago! Now I think I am going to try to get guardianship, because he is developing a tremor in his right hand! Driving me crazy! For the past 11 years has not contributed anything to running of the household! Went through a spell when he refused to write checks for his medical bills from rehab and hospital! Control issues always!........I nominate you for most creative! Most positive too cause you are always lifting us up!
Linda-Sounds like Pa is happy again now that he is back home! Hospitals are scary and docs should never say negative things in front of patients! When Mom was in the hospital, they would start that shit and I would make them leave and talk to me in the conference room! Some of those idiots need a kick in the ass!! A big old Shitofrantic kick in the ass! Thanks for your kind words the other day when I was losing my mind!
Sheila-When Dad first moved in I bought a new couch. Had not had a new couch for years! I was so excited when they delivered it! Anyway 10 minutes later something looked weird on one of the arms! It was scotch tape that was colored in blue! Dad had come down with a cigarette and made a hole in the couch! He had my daughter who was six at the time I think color the tape blue! I was so mad! I was so mad that I couldn't say anything! I just went up to my room and screamed! Hannah of course was proud of herself because she "helped" Poppy fix it! LOL I can so relate to your table being destroyed!
Rosella-Love Dorothy's picture! She has sweetness in her eyes! Hope life starts getting easier for you! You have had a really bad patch! It will get better! Tide needs to change for you now!
Lilli-I agree that Western Medicine isn't what it's cracked up to be! It is really screwed up! Top 1% get the best care and the rest of us sitting ducks! It is a shame!
Ann and Diane- hope you are feeling better!
Jenn- Thanks for the laugh!
Brain is foggy! Just know I love and appreciate every single one of you! Will probably be off and on for a bit cause we are laying floor in the apartment! Wish me luck today! So far so good! I nominate myself for most accident prone! Big pronie! XXOO Kimbo,Kimmy,Kimmie,Kim
Took mom to the doctor today and the doc saw I was physically and mentally worn out between mom and the flu. She called my brother and told him he had to take care of mom for a few days and let me get some rest. Thank you Lord!!!!!! When I finish typing this message I am going to have a shower and go to bed.
Way to go, Diane's Mom's Doctor. Prayer works:) good you were able to walk in and not be carried in, Diane! If I were there I'd make you a big batch of chicken noodle soup. Make some! In regard to everyone wishing Jen would write more: we can encourage people to do many things, but if a creative person is empty, there is not much to create. Must fill up the vessel until it overflows. Sending a deluge of wishes to you, Jen. You are so talented, and I would love to see/read your play. It is a treasure we will have to wait for. Home alone tonight cause hubby's in Vegas having a meeting. I'm going to " eat junk and watch rubbish" and somebody's gonna have to come stop me! Eha ha ha! Love you, I'm reading a new book called, "My Abandonment", by Peter Rock. Kind of scary. MBBL. Love, Christina xo
Hi all, Oh it's been such a long day and I'm beat. It's so good to read everyone's posts. I'm to tired to respond to them tonight so I will say nighty night and see you in the morning.... now to go find my heat pack. Love and prayers for all of you... pass those around :)
Sheila, yes, ask the doctors to help you find the right medicine and the right dosage for your husband. You really need your life a little bit less complicated. There is always that balancement, where the person you take care of is not asleep or numb, but he is not crazy either... It took months for me to find out which was the right dosage for my mother, so that she could still enjoy life and we didn't become nuts. Linda, no, I don't have Heathcliff (Bandit2) anymore. He killed one of my cats 2 days ago, and after 2 hours he was already in a dog shelter. The young people who run the shelter are good people, they are taking good care of him (it is a private structure and you have to pay to keep the dog inside) and they are already looking for a new family for him. I couldn't allow him to kill my cats. Cats for me are as important as dogs. In the same shelter I adopted Dorothy, the same day. She is a very mixed breed, Golf. She is not a puppy, she is more or less 3 years old. She leaves my cats alone and this is the only thing I need... Diane I am curious. Will your brother actually help you or he will find some excuses? "I am sorry, these days I really can't, I have a lot of work, maybe in a few weeks..." Carolyn as you know my story with my mother was very similar to yours. My mother was in control of her money until some years ago. She took money from the ATM. But one day she called my brother and she said: "The ATM doesn't give me money anymore" and my brother checked and saw she had spent all her monthly salary/pension in one week. Later we found out that she gave 50 euros to every person she knew, as a little present (my mother has always been very generous) so she money finished very soon! When my brother understood what was going on, he had no other choice than take control of my mother's money. At first, he gave her a small quantity of money every 2-3 days, so that she could go shopping, but after a little while he realized that she couldn't even handle small sums of money, and she was literally starving because she had no money to go to the grocery... And that was the end, from that moment on my brother had to take total control of my mother's finances. And she managed to get in trouble anyway, because she threw away the bills so my brother couldn't pay them... Long long story. It is sad to take their things away from their hands, but sooner or later you have to do it!
Christine, you are definitely the best cruise director, but I am in the running for most clumsy. I cut a big chunk out of my thumb trying to slice sweet potatoes for Christmas dinner. And, my husband bought me a pistal, last fall, for a Christmas present.(What was he thinking) I'm afraid to load it. I think he thought I would need some sort of protection after he was gone? But, really, I have 2 of the ugliest dogs you ever saw. Between them, they would lick an intruder to death, and then sit on them. The 2 together weigh over 150 pounds. I think I will get rid of the gun. Dorothy is adorable. Puppies are a lot of work sometimes, but worth it. Hope everyone is getting some well deserved rest.
Prejean and Boudreaux were fishing in the Bayou when Prejean pulled out a cigar. Finding he had no matches, he asked Boudreaux for a light.
'Ya, ma fren, I tink I haff a lighter,' Boudreaux replied with a Cajun accent, and then reaching into his tackle box, he pulled out a Bic lighter 10 inches long.
'Holy shit, man!' exclaimed Prejean, taking the huge Bic Lighter in his hands. 'Where'd yew git dat monster?'
'Well,' replied Boudreaux, 'I got it from my Genie.'
'You haff a Genie?' Prejean asked.
'Ya, ma fren. It's right here in my tackle box,' says Boudreaux.
'Could I see him?'
Boudreaux opens his tackle box and sure enough, out pops the Genie.
Addressing the Genie, Prejean says, 'Hey dere! I'm a good buddy of your master. Will you grant me one wish?'
'Yes, I will,' says the Genie.
So Prejean asks the Genie for a million bucks. The Genie disappears back into the tackle box leaving Prejean sitting there waiting for his million bucks.
Shortly, the Louisiana sky darkens and is filled with the sound of a million ducks....flying directly overhead.
Over the roar of the million ducks Prejean yells at Boudreaux, 'What the hell? I asked for a million bucks, not a million ducks!'
Boudreaux answers, 'Ya, I forgot to tell yew dat da Genie is hard of hearing. Do yew really tink I asked for a 10 inch Bic?'
January Took new scarf back to store because it was too tight.
February Fired from pharmacy job for failing to print labels.....Helllloooo!!!bottles won't fit in printer!!!
March Got really excited.....finished jigsaw puzzle in 6 months...Box said ' 2-4 years!'
April Trapped on escalator for hours ... Power went out!!!
May Tried to make Kool-Aid.....wrong instructions..8 cups of water won't fit into those little packets!!!
June Tried to go water skiing..... Couldn't find a lake with a slope.
July Lost breast stroke swimming competition.....Learned later that the other swimmers cheated- they used their arms!!!
August Got locked out of my car in rain storm.....Darn car filled up with water because convertible top was open.
September The capital of California is 'C'.....isn't it???
October Hate M & M's.....They are so hard to peel.
November Baked Thanksgiving turkey for 4 1/2 days...Instructions said bake 1 hour per pound and I weigh 108!!
December Couldn't call 911. 'Duh'.....there's no 'eleven' button on the stupid phone!!!
THE BEST BLONDE JOKE OF THE YEAR - SO FAR
A man was in his front yard mowing grass when his attractive blonde female neighbor came out of the house and went straight to the mailbox. She opened it then slammed it shut and Stormed back in the house. A little later she came out of her house again, went to the mail box and again, opened it, slammed it shut again. Angrily, back into the house she went. As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, here she came out again, marched to the mail box, opened it and then slammed it closed harder than ever. Puzzled by her actions the man asked her, 'Is something wrong?' To which she replied, 'There certainly is!'
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
How do we start a sub title?
https://www.agingcare.com/questions/Coconut-oil-uses-for-elders-148016.htm
Also, I buy my coconut from Tropical Traditions, although there are many companies who sell it. But, they have really good articles about research etc. and recipes too. You need to buy virgin and expellar pressed c.o.
Someone asked if it tastes like coconut. There are two kinds. One is flavored the other has no flavor at all. One of our forum members makes coconut chocolate candies by melting choclate chips and coconut oil together in the microwave and pouring them into ice cube trays...nyom, nyom.
For some, coconut oil can have a "drying" effect when used on the skin. I noticed this when I used in on my face. Crafters who make hand made soap often use coconut oil as a drying agent for people who have oily skin.
Others claim that c.o. also aids in weight loss...here's hoping!!
Lilli
Plenty of that oooozzzzing around...
I'd just like to thank the academy and say how wonderful it is just to be nominated. I would also like to express my deep admiration for my fellow nominees... I am truly blessed....
Good Weekend All.....
She is my hero!
Wish she would write more ...
Golf ~ I wouldn't doubt that he will succeed one day in burning the house down. One of his OCD things is grilled cheese sandwiches. I'd always seemed to wake up when he did, but I didn't this one day. I awoke to the screech of the smoke detector. He decided to make himself a grilled cheese sandwich and melted two sticks of butter in a frying pan and apparently walked away from it, and it caught fire. Another time I went out to the garage to grab something from the garage freezer. I came back to find ashes on my new kitchen table and burn spots on the placemats, along with a horrible smell, which I found out was scorching in the microwave--you know that smell like when popcorn burns. He'd put three teabags on top of something plastic into the microwave, and the teabag staples arced and caught the teabags on fire, so he grabbed the firey mess and tossed it on the table. When I asked him what in the HELL he was doing, he said he thought he was making popcorn.
Believe me when I say I have to keep my eye on him EVERY SECOND.
I can laugh about it now. But I'm trying to keep from a meltdown right now. I visited Alan in the NH. this evening. He's in there for stroke rehab. This is the first time he didn't know me right away, and it came as a god awful shock. After a few minutes, he knew me. He previously has, for a few seconds, called me Karen or Ellen, his ex- and late wives. I seriously don't think I'll be able to handle it if it comes to the point when he completely doesn't recognize me.
On the upside, he's making significant physical progress.
Two rednecks are sitting on the front porch.
One says, "Did you know that Elks have sex 10 to 15 times a night?"
"Aw crap..," says his friend, "and I just joined the VFW!
A State Trooper was patrolling late at night off the main highway.
He sees a couple in a car, with the interior light brightly glowing.
He carefully approaches the car to get a closer look. Then he sees a
young man behind the wheel, reading a computer magazine. He immediately
notices a young woman in the rear seat, filing her fingernails.
Puzzled by this surprising situation, the trooper walks to the car and
gently raps on the driver's window.
The young man lowers his window. 'Uh, yes, Officer'?
The trooper asks: 'What are you doing'?
The young man says: 'Well, Officer, I'm reading a magazine.
Pointing towards the young woman in the back seat the trooper says:
'And her, what is she doing'?
The young man shrugs: 'Sir, I believe she's filing her fingernails.
Now, the trooper is totally confused.
A young couple, alone, in a car, at night in a lover's lane ...
And nothing obscene is happening!
The trooper asks: 'What's your age, young man'?
The young man says: 'I'm 22, sir'.
The trooper asks: 'And her, .... what's her age'?
The young man looks at his watch and replies: 'She'll be 18 in 10 minutes..
stinks in here , dog smell , barf . i shall scrub and clean .
waiting for hospices to get back here .
pa s lookin good , perky perky .
rossella - love ur new doggie . do u still have the other one that likes to destory ur house ? BANDIT #2 ?
you al are so funny . manages to smile thru out all this . love you tons !! xoxo
Linda, Ro, Cricket, Chris, Cuz, JS, Bobbie, Lilli, Mis, SS, et al....you guys are quite the mates! I cast my vote for Christina as the Cruise Director. I think, Chris, you have to have a "Mike Night" regularly so that cuz can exercise his funny bone for all of us.
So much going on this week. Mom is really upset about the IH caregiver and say she wants her own home back to herself. But she did say she won't "kick her out" so I guess that's a good sign.
One of the VN's, an occupational therapist, told Mom they are concerned about her memory. I wish she hadn't said that. It's one of Mom's buttons - she now feels more paranoid that we are ALL watching all the "mistakes" she's making. It makes me feel very sad. I wish I could give her a hug but instead all I can do is try to cheer her up and eventually have to hang up the phone.
Finances are becoming an issue with Mom. She is paranoid about the checkbook - and she can't do the math very well. Mom was always math challenged so you can imagine how bad it is now. Unfortunately, I have to help her balance the checkbook on the phone. We use the speaker phone so she can have her hands free - and then she thinks I'm nearby so she points at things for me to "see". Sometimes, she holds things up to the window because she thinks I'm outside. It's so sad and horribly frustrating. By the time I hang up I'm ready for a stiff drink.
Oh, Chris, to answer your question, my lens is pretty good. I go back to the specialist on Tuesday for a "new and improved" version of the lens. I can actually see snowflakes again! With a little luck, she'll sign the form for the state so I can eventually start driving again. It may be a restricted license (no night driving) but I can live with that.
I'm seething this mornning. The contractor called and won't get here today. The contents of the cabinets are all over the dining room side boards and whatever flat surfaces I found. It's going to be this way until the job is finished "sometime next week". URRRRGGGG
This day just keeps getting better. I have to go over the bank statement with Mom over the phone. I'll procrastinate for an hour or so and then have to bite the bullet and make the call. I'll check back here later today for a dose of reality and some laughs. xoxoxox Love you all! Bee
What breed is she? Linda, I'm sorry you are going through all this. I'm new here but I see you have a powerful support system. Prayers to you and Pa.
I'm sorry everyones going through this. Sheila, I hope I didn't offend you with my post last night....your story just hit my tickle bone and I needed a good laugh. But I know it is not funny.
BYW, I just saw a movie or show where they made grilled cheese with an iron instead of a stove.
I did not know it was he who coined that particular phrase, but I remembered a similar verse from the 70s. It is an form of psychology that seems to work for many things in life, and I think I used that example a while back, writing about something. Does that make me a plagiarist? Now I am feeling guilty. What you don't know can't hurt you. Like if you don't know something is wrong, then are you innocent?
Ah Ha!!! got you thinking . You thought I was going to be serious. Nope. I found a good quote about boats and optimism this morning: Zig Ziglar, one of my most favorite motivational speakers said: "I'm so optimistic, I'd go after Moby Dick in a row boat and take the tartar sauce with me."
All I could think was , EWwww!!! Ewwwwww! No tuna for me today!!! But I eat it plain, no mayo or anything but a little lemon juice and romaine. I should weigh 120 by now, but I don't, so another day of trying, another day of doing my best, waiting for school to start Monday.
Cricket, I am practicing my affirmations everyday, all day: "The fat is melting away. I am fit, I am beautiful." Well, my mirror was laughing, but I did not let it get me down or run for the potato chips. haha I don't have any chips in the house:)
It's another Unbelievable day on the southern left coast! Not as warm as yesterday--it was 78 at 4 pm. I've already been for my walk and taken Mother her Metamucil and prescriptions, but will visit her in afternoon, cause she sleeps every day after breakfast until after lunch! After the 2 rounds of antibiotics, it is weird how she is so much better?! I am grateful.
Caroly, my house is torn up too, but now as much as yours. Next week we have the hot water rerouted through the walls, new floor in family room, and dry wall and painting to be done. It's OK, because Hubby is a contractor and gets the best guys to do the work. so much dust. I'll run my air purifier and be at school, go to the library and read.
Cute puppy, Rosella. Precious. I appreciate the love you all have for your puppies, as my cat and I run the other way. haha. My brother has a fantastic dog, but that's all he has. As children, we were not allowed to have dogs, so just as I was always alone, I learned to be more comfortable and learned to prefer no dogs, being alone. At this time, it is not something I want to embrace, but maybe someday. woof.
Have a great day everyone! Oh no-- Cruise director? That is a lot of responsibility! Ok, let's get moving with some activities!! Let's head to the bar! Whoo Hoo!
Love you girls, and a great Cuz. Hugs, Christina xo
Cricket-I will take that nomination for most difficult Dad! Last night he was refusing to sign his Social Security check! I would ask him and he would give me the look and shake his head no and throw the pen down on the counter! Later he signed. Ron and I told him we can't afford to pay for his Meds and other needs out of pocket! He refused to give me power of attorney a long time ago! Now I think I am going to try to get guardianship, because he is developing a tremor in his right hand! Driving me crazy! For the past 11 years has not contributed anything to running of the household! Went through a spell when he refused to write checks for his medical bills from rehab and hospital! Control issues always!........I nominate you for most creative! Most positive too cause you are always lifting us up!
Linda-Sounds like Pa is happy again now that he is back home! Hospitals are scary and docs should never say negative things in front of patients! When Mom was in the hospital, they would start that shit and I would make them leave and talk to me in the conference room! Some of those idiots need a kick in the ass!! A big old Shitofrantic kick in the ass! Thanks for your kind words the other day when I was losing my mind!
Sheila-When Dad first moved in I bought a new couch. Had not had a new couch for years! I was so excited when they delivered it! Anyway 10 minutes later something looked weird on one of the arms! It was scotch tape that was colored in blue! Dad had come down with a cigarette and made a hole in the couch! He had my daughter who was six at the time I think color the tape blue! I was so mad! I was so mad that I couldn't say anything! I just went up to my room and screamed! Hannah of course was proud of herself because she "helped" Poppy fix it! LOL I can so relate to your table being destroyed!
Rosella-Love Dorothy's picture! She has sweetness in her eyes! Hope life starts getting easier for you! You have had a really bad patch! It will get better! Tide needs to change for you now!
Lilli-I agree that Western Medicine isn't what it's cracked up to be! It is really screwed up! Top 1% get the best care and the rest of us sitting ducks! It is a shame!
Ann and Diane- hope you are feeling better!
Jenn- Thanks for the laugh!
Brain is foggy! Just know I love and appreciate every single one of you! Will probably be off and on for a bit cause we are laying floor in the apartment! Wish me luck today! So far so good! I nominate myself for most accident prone! Big pronie! XXOO Kimbo,Kimmy,Kimmie,Kim
Have a good night my dear friends.
Love ya,
Diane
In regard to everyone wishing Jen would write more: we can encourage people
to do many things, but if a creative person is empty, there is not much to create.
Must fill up the vessel until it overflows. Sending a deluge of wishes to you, Jen.
You are so talented, and I would love to see/read your play. It is a treasure we will have to wait for.
Home alone tonight cause hubby's in Vegas having a meeting. I'm going to " eat junk and watch rubbish" and somebody's gonna have to come stop me! Eha ha ha! Love you, I'm reading a new book called, "My Abandonment", by Peter Rock.
Kind of scary. MBBL. Love, Christina xo
Linda, no, I don't have Heathcliff (Bandit2) anymore. He killed one of my cats 2 days ago, and after 2 hours he was already in a dog shelter. The young people who run the shelter are good people, they are taking good care of him (it is a private structure and you have to pay to keep the dog inside) and they are already looking for a new family for him. I couldn't allow him to kill my cats. Cats for me are as important as dogs. In the same shelter I adopted Dorothy, the same day. She is a very mixed breed, Golf. She is not a puppy, she is more or less 3 years old. She leaves my cats alone and this is the only thing I need...
Diane I am curious. Will your brother actually help you or he will find some excuses? "I am sorry, these days I really can't, I have a lot of work, maybe in a few weeks..."
Carolyn as you know my story with my mother was very similar to yours. My mother was in control of her money until some years ago. She took money from the ATM. But one day she called my brother and she said: "The ATM doesn't give me money anymore" and my brother checked and saw she had spent all her monthly salary/pension in one week. Later we found out that she gave 50 euros to every person she knew, as a little present (my mother has always been very generous) so she money finished very soon! When my brother understood what was going on, he had no other choice than take control of my mother's money. At first, he gave her a small quantity of money every 2-3 days, so that she could go shopping, but after a little while he realized that she couldn't even handle small sums of money, and she was literally starving because she had no money to go to the grocery... And that was the end, from that moment on my brother had to take total control of my mother's finances. And she managed to get in trouble anyway, because she threw away the bills so my brother couldn't pay them...
Long long story. It is sad to take their things away from their hands, but sooner or later you have to do it!
Dorothy is adorable. Puppies are a lot of work sometimes, but worth it. Hope everyone is getting some well deserved rest.
Prejean and Boudreaux were fishing in the
Bayou when Prejean pulled out a cigar. Finding he had
no matches, he asked Boudreaux for a light.
'Ya, ma fren, I tink I haff a lighter,'
Boudreaux replied with a Cajun
accent, and then reaching into his tackle
box, he pulled out a Bic lighter 10 inches long.
'Holy shit, man!' exclaimed Prejean, taking
the huge Bic Lighter in his hands.
'Where'd yew git dat monster?'
'Well,' replied Boudreaux,
'I got it from my Genie.'
'You haff a Genie?' Prejean asked.
'Ya, ma fren. It's right here in my tackle
box,' says Boudreaux.
'Could I see him?'
Boudreaux opens his tackle box and
sure enough, out pops the Genie.
Addressing the Genie, Prejean says,
'Hey dere! I'm a good buddy of
your master. Will you grant me
one wish?'
'Yes, I will,' says the Genie.
So Prejean asks the Genie for a
million bucks. The Genie disappears
back into the tackle box leaving
Prejean sitting there waiting for his million
bucks.
Shortly, the Louisiana sky
darkens and is filled with the sound of
a million ducks....flying directly overhead.
Over the roar of the million ducks
Prejean yells at Boudreaux,
'What the hell? I asked for a million
bucks, not a million ducks!'
Boudreaux answers,
'Ya, I forgot to tell yew dat da Genie
is hard of hearing. Do yew really tink
I asked for a 10 inch Bic?'
January
Took new scarf back to store because it was too tight.
February
Fired from pharmacy job for failing to print labels.....Helllloooo!!!bottles won't fit in printer!!!
March
Got really excited.....finished jigsaw puzzle in 6 months...Box said ' 2-4 years!'
April
Trapped on escalator for hours ...
Power went out!!!
May
Tried to make Kool-Aid.....wrong instructions..8 cups of water won't fit into those little packets!!!
June
Tried to go water skiing.....
Couldn't find a lake with a slope.
July
Lost breast stroke swimming competition.....Learned later that the other swimmers cheated- they used their arms!!!
August
Got locked out of my car in rain storm.....Darn car filled up with water because convertible top was open.
September
The capital of California is 'C'.....isn't it???
October
Hate M & M's.....They are so hard to peel.
November
Baked Thanksgiving turkey for 4 1/2 days...Instructions said bake 1 hour per pound and I weigh 108!!
December
Couldn't call 911.
'Duh'.....there's no 'eleven' button on the stupid phone!!!
THE BEST BLONDE JOKE OF THE YEAR - SO FAR
A man was in his front yard mowing grass when his attractive blonde female neighbor came out of the house and went straight to the mailbox.
She opened it then slammed it shut and Stormed back in the house.
A little later she came out of her house again, went to the mail box and again, opened it, slammed it shut again. Angrily, back into the house she went.
As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, here she came out again, marched to the mail box, opened it and then slammed it closed harder than ever.
Puzzled by her actions the man asked her, 'Is something wrong?'
To which she replied, 'There certainly is!'
(Are you ready? This is a beauty...)
'My stupid computer keeps saying, 'YOU'VE GOT MAIL!'
Reply to:
Reply to: David Randall All
Reply to David Randall Send
luvCuz