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Who would have thought my best laugh of the day would be checking in on AC's Gross out? Thanks again cuz.
One of the "joy's" of having my mother live with me is that when I am out running errands (or trying to just chill) you never know when my cell phone will ring with Mom calling for just about anything.
The other evening it went like this.
"Hi, Mom" "How'd you know it was me?" "Caller ID Mom" "Oh, I forgot. Well anyway can you pick me up some hair mousse at Walmart?" "I reckon" "OK. Anything else?" "Thats all I can think of right now."
So I end up at Walmart looking for mousse, which I found. I head toward the register that looks the fastest (which I almost always guess wrong) and wait in line with my one can of mousse.
Cashier scans and looks at me and proclaims "Why do you need this fer yew ain't got no hare?"
Now in the cashier’s defense, I don’t have a lot of hair. She was trying to joke with me pleasantly but what I said next was almost knee-jerk response. I was smiling when I said it though.
"I don't have a vagina either but I have been known to pick up feminine hygene products for my wife and/or daughters, know what I mean?"
She was kinda red faced but we laughed a bit.
"You take care now." I told her "Tomorrow I might be back to get a training bra for my man-boobs!"
Love the man boobs part, others too. Igore, you are too much. We all miss you on the thread. Maybe some don't realize that you are now working the day shift and can't screw around (participating in GO) as much as when you were working the night shift. Also, when you get home (from day shift) you have non stop requests on your time. When do you go back nights? Miss you little monster. Hugs, Cattails.
Hi everybody. I went on vacation, remember me, obsessing and laughing and crying about it? I'm still alive. I'm not dead in a ditch. Forgive me for not letting you know sooner. Have you heard of that TV show, "When Vacations Attack"? Say no more. Anyway, I'm processing. I'll tell the truth, after all the noise I made, I was really afraid of disappointing you girls! I wanted you to enjoy the buildup, and I didn't want the delivery to be a big let down! So I'm processing, haven't read everyone's notes yet. I missed you. More soon. Love, Hannalee
Igore - The beginning of your mom's call reminded me of something my dad did that used to drive me crazy. I would be up at 5am to get to work early and he would hear me in the kitchen. And then he would say - " Linda? Is that you?" It took every ounce of control to not once answer, who the "F" do you think it is at 5am? I wish I could hear him say it one more time. But it's those kind of memories that let me smile from time to time. Hope everyone is having as good a day as possible. Hugs, Kuli
I definitely see your point. Why is it that that things that agravate us about kids, parents, spouses, and so on, are the very things that when they are no longer there that we miss the most?
My son will be 14 in July. Until he was 11 he wanted me to scratch his back at bedtime. I was glad he outgrew it but I miss that part of his life now. Nothing stays the same. He is just 1/2" of being 6' now.
Kuli and Igore, You're not kidding. My daughter is going to be 14 at the end of the month and it never fails to amaze me that she has gotten taller than both of her grandmothers and one of her aunts. Sometimes she seems so immature and then there will be some defining moment in which she surprises me.
We have started Home Hospice. They will give us 5 days of respite per month. Which is very nice. I'm hoping that it will go well. Especially with how much father in law has gone down hill. I guess his alzhiemers is affecting mostly the frontal Lobe of the brain; which, if I understand correctly, causes faster deterioration. His Doctor has introduced another medication. It is a drop that we put in his mouth. It has been a good thing. He gets so mean. It keeps him stable and more mellow. I hate using chemical restraints, which is what this type of medication is, but I don't know that we have any other option. He has kicked his wife in the stomach twice and slapped her once all because he didn't want to take his pills. One day I caught Him trying to take Great-Grandma's walker up the stairs and I caught Him half way up. He started losing his balance so I rushed up,pushed on his rear, and told him to grab the rail. I said that this walker stays down stairs and He needs to let me take it. I tell him how it's grandma's walker and without it she will fall. I told him all sorts of things that were just not getting through. Finally I say "Give me the walker please". He looks at me in anger and shoves the walker at me, pulling the brake chord out of the handle which I had to have my husband fix later. He raises his hand slightly and I said his full name and announced to him in a very stern voice "Don't even think of hitting me. I can hit a lot harder than you can." Not that I would ever actually hit him, but geez we were sitting there on the stairs fighting over a walker while he's tottering back and forth; and there was no way I was goin to try to drag a six foot three, two year old up the stairs. He was very shocked, but he lowered his hand. I think the reason I was so quick to temper is because I was at the tail end of my four, 16hr days with him and earlier that day He also almost pulled Great-Grandma down the stairs because he wouldn't give her her walker. He said it was his and he was taking it. Jerked on it while she was hanging on to it. If I hadn't walked in and grabbed hold of her she would have tumbled down those stairs. I told him to give her the damn walker and if I saw him trying to take it from her again he would be dealing with me and not a 97 year old woman. I'm ashamed to say I did get kind of loud at that point, but I believe it was more the scare than anything else that made me yell at him. He went in his room and sulked for about twenty minutes. I went down to make supper and it was while I was finishing that I saw him trying to take it upstairs. After I got everything settle and I had everyone in bed. I worked out on the elyptical for a whole hour thinking what a terrible person I was for yelling at him. Enough to say that I am thrilled about the hospice because the stress of dealing with his mood swings has been eating at me like crazy. Maybe now we can get a real break. Is that terrible? Is it terrible to need a break away from Him?
Hannalee, welcome back! Okay so your adventures turned into misadventures... but hey you still have a story and we wanna hear it! :)
SS, I agree that whatever decision you made about the lease, etc. don't be afraid to come back and post because everyone here including myself is not going to judge your decisions, we all truly care about you and only want what is best for you. Only you have the right to make the decisions affecting you, we are here to cheer you on and hopefully say the right things to support you. Please don't worry about it if you decided to resign that lease. xoxoxo
Tomorrows a big day for me, I'm off to take my exam for my class so I'm off to bed early tonight. Night everyone. ...............¨♥*✫♥,☀ .........,•✯´.........´*✫ .......♥*................•✯ .......*♥............… ...✫ ...¸.•✫.............……♥*•✫ ...~`,`~................*.•✫ ¸....✫Sweet Dreams*✫♥* ´¸...*♥..´¸...........*♥ ´¸¸♥*...............¸.• ´¸.•✫ ............. ~`,`~............. `.✫`.............. ●/................ /▌................ / \................Cricketღ
Angelhair, you are a saint. 4 16 hour days of taking care of FIL. Come on, he is not in his right mind, if you have to yell, you have to yell. So hope the Hospice gives you a well deserved break. Take care,
Angelhair: So how is Great-Grandma doing? Sounds like she's had a couple of close calls. For a minute there, I thought you were running a family group home. Actually, I guess you are. Then I read your profile and realized how you had come to take care of so many. I'd rather yell and intimidate that get smacked up side the head. Lot harder to keep everyone standing while you are getting pummeled. You keep yelling. I hope the hospice people can give you a needed and deserved break.
We picked up my dad this morning, so life is back to the usual.
Cricket: Good luck on your exam tomorrow. Meanwhile: Hope Omaha is improving. SS: Stay in touch. Christina: Hope your exams turned out ok. Cricket: How's Lucky doing. Cuz: Love your jokes. Jen: Hope all is well with you. Put a banana peel out for Fart Pants. Bobbie: What's going on with the Boat Angel? Kuli: Good to hear from you. Igore: You must be having a slow evening. Hannalee: Let's hear the details.
No doubt I've missed a few, but as I said, just picked up dad this morning.
Angelhair ~ I can so relate to the combativeness. My husband Alan is a little less combative this stint home (he's had three strokes, each one requiring a hospital/rehab stay), but before, oh, man, we had several knock down and drag out episodes every day because of things like your walker incident. You want to talk about yelling! Maybe, just maybe, Mother Theresa would be able to handle them, but we're just your average Joes/Janes thrown into the role of caregiver. Don't beat yourself up. Sounds like they might have to increase the number of magic drops your dad's on. May I ask the real name of the rx, so I know what to ask for if Alan gets this bad again. It's good that your dad backs down when you confront him. That worked for me too. I'd puff myself up, get in his face and stare him down with, "You want to hit me. Go ahead. Hit me." And he'd back down and say that he didn't want to hit me. Phew. It really takes a lot out of you, doesn't it. And it's so hard to keep in mind that they don't mean it. When he does that I feel so unappreciated. About the best to be said is that you've got understanding and comfort here. Cyber hugs to you.
Cattails, Lucky is doing really great. I'm only having to put drops in his eyes twice a day now and he goes back in for a final check in 3 weeks. The surgery saved his vision in that eye. We are so relieved. Thanks for asking. Your a sweetheart!
Angelhair, I can tell you the reason you felt guilty was because it was a situation where you were forced to act against your nature. DON'T feel guilty. You acted in a way that was necessary for the protection of yourself and the fil. Think, if you hadn't raised your voice and if took a swing at you he could have fallen when you naturally would have reacted by moving to protect yourself and then he could have really been hurt. Just hope the drops calm that ornery guy down, and in the meanwhile you remember he is the "big"child and you are the parent (and a damn good one imo) Keep the upper hand and if you have to raise your voice to do the job then more power to you!
Everyone have a good day and stay connected here, we all need each other!
Thank you everyone. I was feeling guilty, but I do know that you are right. Of course, I feel guilty when I have to displine my children too. The other night I had a rough time with my fourteen year old because, of all things, she wouldn't go to bed and it was midnight. I said some hurtful things that, even though they were true and she probably needed to hear them, I should have picked a better way to say them. I'm not usually so loud or rough about it. She went to bed angry; and I sat in my room and cried for 15 min. It is very against my nature to be loud, or even mean, but you have to do what you have to do. Later I went down to her room while she was asleep and gave her a kiss on the forhead. Made me feel better. We were both much better the next morning and she even apologized for her behavior the night before. Teenagers, what to do with them. sheilablake The magic drops are called Lorazepam. It only takes about .25 ML and he does a lot better.
Anyway, he goes for his first time for respite on Monday. He gets very anxious every time he has to leave the house so we'll see how it goes. Wish us luck. Kids are home so I've gotta go.
Angelhair it is so hard to deal with teenagers but you did good and got to talk with her the next morning-you have to be the parent no matter what and you did it -ggod for you
Good Morning Crew, I read the stories about the bad behavior and you guys have my empathy. What angels you all are. I can tell by my lack of coping skills.... mom got the last of them and I still don't know how I got through the estate sales and all of that insanity... that there is no way now I could handle what you guys are going through. I went through it too during my time as an active caregiver but omg the combative issues with the demented are just so toxic and draining. I know for sure the exhaustion that you guys are experiencing.
Angelhair, how you can do this with your kids in the house is totally beyond me. Ya I think all of you are Mother Theresa!
The Boat Angel is still in the hospital and is hoping that his kidneys will be functioning well enough for him to leave there and come back to the boat in the next few days. I, however, am not on the same page because of my inability to cope with, wait for it, oh ya, ANYTHING that doesn't have some laughs in it. Time will tell.
Cuz, thanks again for the jokes. BTW, I found some interesting stuff while shifting boxes from one storage unit to the new one and that is the ancestry of the B family. I think I remember that you were interested in that and I would love to see you have it. love you guys more than you'll ever know, lovbob
Bobbie: Does the boat angel think he is coming back to stay at his boat or yours? I don't mean to pry, but I'm just feeling like you are in a tough spot and not wanting to think too much about it. After all, he could end up staying in the hospital longer, and you so might not want to cross that bridge til it actually arrives.
I certainly understand how you feel about care giving. When this is over with my dad, I am going to take a long, long, maybe rest of my life vacation from doing this again.
However, you never know what the future holds. I'm married and my husband both talk about what will happen when we reach a certain stage in our lives. Care taking can sure wake you up to the realities of old age.
Amen to that Cattails! I just got back from getting my haircut awhile ago and the lady who cuts my hair was telling me about another client of hers that was a caregiver and she said the day the person who she was caring for had died the lady came in for a haircut and told her that would be the last time she would see her and my hairdresser said why is that? her client said because I'm getting the hell out of here and just keep going wherever as long as I keep moving I will be okay!! LOL Right now I'm wanting to just get out for a few days but I don't see it happening any time soon, hopefully once my class is finished. All is quiet on my home front and I'm counting my blessings. Bobbie, you are in a hard spot with the boat angel...just let your feelings be your guide. Just put yourself first, you really need to recover from caregiving not continue it. But whatever you do, I am with you. It looks like summer is here :( it's been 87 plus the last couple of days and looks like it's only going to get hotter from here on out! I was really enjoying our winter season this year and hate to see it end. Well it's time for me to get busy again around here..
For what it is worth, I was just watching an Oprah show....sorry....the jest of the conversation was that you need to feel your pain. Pain that goes back, not just the current stuff that we all try to cope with. Blah Blah, but here was the thing that struck me. You need to understand that putting others before yourself is putting God last. God is in you and the world sees God through you. Your cup needs to overflowith. The point being that you can give others the overflow, but the full cup is for you. Your cup needs to be full. And that full cup is for you, not someone else. They get the overflow.
Well, my mind is like a sieve, so this will be gone in a short while, but it was touching when I heard it. Maybe some of you can hang onto it longer.
In short, I guess it just means that we have to save ourselves first. Find a way to let go of the past, not be addicted to our stories, and move out of that shadow. That will fill us up and then we can give the overflow to others, but not the essence of the cup.
Had a bit of a last gasp snow rain wind grapple blizzard here yesterday. Definitely Spring time here, clouds scudding by heading North. Sun back out, literally if not figuratively...
I hope the boat angle can come home soon. Hospital no place to heal, you know...
Anyone else having fun with the 1940 census? Very cool..
A good ol' Kentucky boy won a bass boat in a raffle drawing. He brought it home and his wife looks at him and says, What you gonna do with that. There ain't no water deep enough to float a boat within 100 miles of here."
He says, "I won it and I'm a-gonna keep it."
His brother came over to visit several days later. He sees the wife and asks where his brother is.
She says, "He's out there in his bass boat", pointing to the field behind the house.
The brother heads out behind the house and sees his brother in the middle of a big field sitting in a bass boat with a fishing rod in his hand . He yells out to him, "What are you doin'?"
His brother replies, "I'm fishin'. What does it look like I'm a doin'?"
His brother yells, "It's people like you that give people from Kentucky
a bad name, makin' everybody think we're stupid. If I could swim, I'd come out there and whip your ass!"
Hey bobbie let me know how much it would cost to mail that stuff to me and I will send ya the money OR maybe we could save up some money and drive down to see ya. luvCuz
Angelhair ~ Thanks for the name of the rx. Good to have a card up one's sleeve for when the time comes. Thankfully, Alan's being a lot calmer right now.
Bobbie - I hope u have a good day today, darling. I read ur post about not sure how you got through it all but also about your current lack of coping skills. Well I AM still in the caregiver stage and I definitely have a lack of coping skills. It sucks, right? I'm sorry you are feeling that way. I cleaned out and sold my parents house before they died and it was emotionally and physically exhausting. None of this easy, right? I think (but not sure) what I'm seeing here is although the physical act of caregiver can be over for some, the mental strain and torture it does to your brain is just as hard to recover from. And it doesn't happen in a day. Let's just happen it happens!!
Like the lady who got her haircut, the person she was caring for died then she said she was going to get the hell of of there! I think some people are better at letting the emotional part go than others. We all have a lot in common, that's for damn sure and or we wouldn't be on this thread that Bobbie created for us and brought us together. But as much as we have in common, every one of us has a slightly different situation and that makes coping, and letting go, different for all of us. You guys got me through some of my darkest times. And becasue my "not so independent" Mom is still down the street and Dad is in the NH, I know I have more dark days to come. My siblings are useless and non responsive to my pleas for help. God help them....I'm trying not to let this situation kill my marriage. my family, my friendships and my own self being. It's hard and a struggle every day to try and stay strong. I listened to myself complain to a friend on the phone yesterday. Wow, I am a drag! I wouldn't want to be around me!! So every day I have to say to myself, stay strong, stay positive and stay sane. I want my life back damn it and the only way I'm going to get it back is to grab it! No one is going to help me and pull me out of this. It's up to me. I am hiring a caregiver to take my Mom around for errands so I don't have to hear about all her complaining and misgivings about her life, and about how my siblings shouldn't be expected to help because "they live too far away" or "they have their own trouble." F' that! I love her but she's toxic so I need to stay away as much as I can. That's my plan. Selfish? Maybe but it's survival for me at point. And I choose to live again.
happy good friday you all ! bobbie - i sure hope ur angel gets to come back to the boat and heal . i know u take good care of him . hospital sucks ! gloomy place to be . ur boat is very cozy and homey and that bed is awesome comfertable ! prayin he gets to come back in ur boat and be happy camper .... love u bobbie lou .. frost came and went this morning . so far all my plants are lookin good . whew .... sure felt like it was going to snow last night , that wind was cold and smelled winter in it ., going to have mil and bil here all weekend . isnt life great :( .. the guys are going off sat all day and im gonna have mil in my hair , where is my son do u know where he went did he go home without me , waa waa waaaaaaaaa . then repeat again . where is my son ?? etc ec etc ........ hopin my daughter will keep her gma . but i highly doubt that ll happen . so i think its a zannax weekend . selfishsibling - am happythat u hired a caregiver to hang around ur mom . yes if shes toxi i wouldnt want that around me either . i be zoomin to bobbie s boat . sit in the chair and watch the train go by ohh its a wonderful feeling , jump up and wave and wave ! i remmy when i was a lit girl the guys on the train would throw candies ! wait till they zoom by and i go runnin and gather up candies . great feeling . am missing christina , sniff , love reading her post , shes a wonderful person . shes my angel :-) .... one day shes going to make me gator tails . love u girl ! xoxox flex - love that kentucky joke . made me smile .
i am doing ok . just dont have a routine , its all screwed up . id sit in garage for 2 or 3 hrs , smokin , slurpin coffee and texting my bro . on my phone i have my dad s picture as background . i get to see him anytime i reach for the phone . id kiss my dad and hug him and run my fingers on his face . gawd i miss my daddy . talk to him on my phone , gives me some comferts , so he is with me always cuz the phone is with me always . was suppose to help a neighbor with her greenhouse , but its holdin me back . i dont wanna work . i dont wanna handle her moneyor anybodys money if they buy flowers , i told her it could come up short and i dont want to feel bad or her thinkin i rip her off . or short change a custmers or gave custmers toomuch change back . no money handling fr me , if its my money yep sure but its not my money and i aint touching it ,. when i was young a friend of mind had some money she didnt have a pocket and told me to put it in my pocket so i kept her money in left pocket and i had my money in right pocket , i had no idea how much she had i justtook it and put in my left pocket . well when time came she said oh i need my money , i reach in left pocket and gave em to her , she flat out said im missin 20 bucks . uhhh ok i reach in to feel around its empty , i ck my right pocket yep those were my money . she said well 20 bucks are missing ! i had to tell her i dont have em . well ever since then i refuse to hold anybodys money or handle anybodys money . fk that . it did hurt me and made me feel like i stole her money but i didnt ... i could have to be a cashier but nanana , that time ruined me , never wanna handle money if its not mine . so i explain that to my neighbor , she said oh i understand but it be ok ,i said nope it wont be ok . not doing it sorrryyieee . next friday i ll help her unload the truck full of flowers but aint touchin the cashier ,
ok i need to zoom to cvs and then go to farm store to see if they have any baby ducks , wanna give em to my neighbor , he has a pond . i love watching em swim and havin a blast .
you all have a happy weekend and be meowing at ya all one day soon . love you !! xoxo
SS I do not know if you follow Cmagnam's thread on dyfunitions family's it is good about detachment-I have learned a lot from that. Linda it takes awhile to get into a new normal routine-you will do fine-you have good thoughts about your Pa.
ss: Good step. If your mom is going to continue to live just minutes from you then hiring someone to step in and give you distance from her is the best thing.
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One of the "joy's" of having my mother live with me is that when I am out running errands (or trying to just chill) you never know when my cell phone will ring with Mom calling for just about anything.
The other evening it went like this.
"Hi, Mom"
"How'd you know it was me?"
"Caller ID Mom"
"Oh, I forgot. Well anyway can you pick me up some hair mousse at Walmart?"
"I reckon"
"OK. Anything else?"
"Thats all I can think of right now."
So I end up at Walmart looking for mousse, which I found. I head toward the register that looks the fastest (which I almost always guess wrong) and wait in line with my one can of mousse.
Cashier scans and looks at me and proclaims "Why do you need this fer yew ain't got no hare?"
Now in the cashier’s defense, I don’t have a lot of hair. She was trying to joke with me pleasantly but what I said next was almost knee-jerk response. I was smiling when I said it though.
"I don't have a vagina either but I have been known to pick up feminine hygene products for my wife and/or daughters, know what I mean?"
She was kinda red faced but we laughed a bit.
"You take care now." I told her "Tomorrow I might be back to get a training bra for my man-boobs!"
I definitely see your point. Why is it that that things that agravate us about kids, parents, spouses, and so on, are the very things that when they are no longer there that we miss the most?
My son will be 14 in July. Until he was 11 he wanted me to scratch his back at bedtime. I was glad he outgrew it but I miss that part of his life now. Nothing stays the same. He is just 1/2" of being 6' now.
You're not kidding. My daughter is going to be 14 at the end of the month and it never fails to amaze me that she has gotten taller than both of her grandmothers and one of her aunts. Sometimes she seems so immature and then there will be some defining moment in which she surprises me.
Hannalee, welcome back! Okay so your adventures turned into misadventures... but hey you still have a story and we wanna hear it! :)
SS, I agree that whatever decision you made about the lease, etc. don't be afraid to come back and post because everyone here including myself is not going to judge your decisions, we all truly care about you and only want what is best for you. Only you have the right to make the decisions affecting you, we are here to cheer you on and hopefully say the right things to support you. Please don't worry about it if you decided to resign that lease. xoxoxo
Tomorrows a big day for me, I'm off to take my exam for my class so I'm off to bed early tonight. Night everyone.
...............¨♥*✫♥,☀
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.......*♥............… ...✫
...¸.•✫.............……♥*•✫
...~`,`~................*.•✫
¸....✫Sweet Dreams*✫♥*
´¸...*♥..´¸...........*♥
´¸¸♥*...............¸.•
´¸.•✫ .............
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/ \................Cricketღ
We picked up my dad this morning, so life is back to the usual.
Cricket: Good luck on your exam tomorrow.
Meanwhile: Hope Omaha is improving.
SS: Stay in touch.
Christina: Hope your exams turned out ok.
Cricket: How's Lucky doing.
Cuz: Love your jokes.
Jen: Hope all is well with you. Put a banana peel out for Fart Pants.
Bobbie: What's going on with the Boat Angel?
Kuli: Good to hear from you.
Igore: You must be having a slow evening.
Hannalee: Let's hear the details.
No doubt I've missed a few, but as I said, just picked up dad this morning.
Love and Hugs to everyone, Cattails.
Cattails, Lucky is doing really great. I'm only having to put drops in his eyes twice a day now and he goes back in for a final check in 3 weeks. The surgery saved his vision in that eye. We are so relieved. Thanks for asking. Your a sweetheart!
Angelhair, I can tell you the reason you felt guilty was because it was a situation where you were forced to act against your nature. DON'T feel guilty. You acted in a way that was necessary for the protection of yourself and the fil. Think, if you hadn't raised your voice and if took a swing at you he could have fallen when you naturally would have reacted by moving to protect yourself and then he could have really been hurt. Just hope the drops calm that ornery guy down, and in the meanwhile you remember he is the "big"child and you are the parent (and a damn good one imo) Keep the upper hand and if you have to raise your voice to do the job then more power to you!
Everyone have a good day and stay connected here, we all need each other!
Love Cricketღ
sheilablake
The magic drops are called Lorazepam. It only takes about .25 ML and he does a lot better.
Anyway, he goes for his first time for respite on Monday. He gets very anxious every time he has to leave the house so we'll see how it goes. Wish us luck.
Kids are home so I've gotta go.
Women have said that giving birth is way more painful than a man getting kicked in the testicles. Here is proof that they are wrong:
A year or so after giving birth a woman will often say, "It would be nice to have another baby".
You never hear a man say, "I would like another kick in the nuts".
Case closed.
I read the stories about the bad behavior and you guys have my empathy. What angels you all are. I can tell by my lack of coping skills.... mom got the last of them and I still don't know how I got through the estate sales and all of that insanity... that there is no way now I could handle what you guys are going through. I went through it too during my time as an active caregiver but omg the combative issues with the demented are just so toxic and draining. I know for sure the exhaustion that you guys are experiencing.
Angelhair, how you can do this with your kids in the house is totally beyond me. Ya I think all of you are Mother Theresa!
The Boat Angel is still in the hospital and is hoping that his kidneys will be functioning well enough for him to leave there and come back to the boat in the next few days. I, however, am not on the same page because of my inability to cope with, wait for it, oh ya, ANYTHING that doesn't have some laughs in it. Time will tell.
Cuz, thanks again for the jokes.
BTW, I found some interesting stuff while shifting boxes from one storage unit to the new one and that is the ancestry of the B family. I think I remember that you were interested in that and I would love to see you have it.
love you guys more than you'll ever know,
lovbob
I certainly understand how you feel about care giving. When this is over with my dad, I am going to take a long, long, maybe rest of my life vacation from doing this again.
However, you never know what the future holds. I'm married and my husband both talk about what will happen when we reach a certain stage in our lives. Care taking can sure wake you up to the realities of old age.
Love and Hugs,
Cattails
Love you all,
Cricketღ
Well, my mind is like a sieve, so this will be gone in a short while, but it was touching when I heard it. Maybe some of you can hang onto it longer.
In short, I guess it just means that we have to save ourselves first. Find a way to let go of the past, not be addicted to our stories, and move out of that shadow. That will fill us up and then we can give the overflow to others, but not the essence of the cup.
I hope the boat angle can come home soon. Hospital no place to heal, you know...
Anyone else having fun with the 1940 census? Very cool..
Hanging in there here, not much else to do...
A good ol' Kentucky boy won a bass boat in a raffle drawing.
He brought it home and his wife looks at him and says,
What you gonna do with that. There ain't no water deep enough to
float a boat within 100 miles of here."
He says, "I won it and I'm a-gonna keep it."
His brother came over to visit several days later. He sees
the wife and asks where his brother is.
She says, "He's out there in his bass boat",
pointing to the field behind the house.
The brother heads out behind the house and sees his
brother in the middle of a big field sitting in a
bass boat with a fishing rod in his hand .
He yells out to him, "What are you doin'?"
His brother replies, "I'm fishin'. What does it look like I'm a doin'?"
His brother yells, "It's people like you that give people from Kentucky
a bad name, makin' everybody think we're stupid. If
I could swim, I'd come out there and whip your ass!"
luvCuz
Like the lady who got her haircut, the person she was caring for died then she said she was going to get the hell of of there! I think some people are better at letting the emotional part go than others. We all have a lot in common, that's for damn sure and or we wouldn't be on this thread that Bobbie created for us and brought us together. But as much as we have in common, every one of us has a slightly different situation and that makes coping, and letting go, different for all of us. You guys got me through some of my darkest times. And becasue my "not so independent" Mom is still down the street and Dad is in the NH, I know I have more dark days to come. My siblings are useless and non responsive to my pleas for help. God help them....I'm trying not to let this situation kill my marriage. my family, my friendships and my own self being. It's hard and a struggle every day to try and stay strong. I listened to myself complain to a friend on the phone yesterday. Wow, I am a drag! I wouldn't want to be around me!! So every day I have to say to myself, stay strong, stay positive and stay sane. I want my life back damn it and the only way I'm going to get it back is to grab it! No one is going to help me and pull me out of this. It's up to me. I am hiring a caregiver to take my Mom around for errands so I don't have to hear about all her complaining and misgivings about her life, and about how my siblings shouldn't be expected to help because "they live too far away" or "they have their own trouble." F' that! I love her but she's toxic so I need to stay away as much as I can. That's my plan. Selfish? Maybe but it's survival for me at point. And I choose to live again.
Luv u all,
-SS
bobbie - i sure hope ur angel gets to come back to the boat and heal . i know u take good care of him . hospital sucks ! gloomy place to be . ur boat is very cozy and homey and that bed is awesome comfertable ! prayin he gets to come back in ur boat and be happy camper .... love u bobbie lou ..
frost came and went this morning . so far all my plants are lookin good . whew ....
sure felt like it was going to snow last night , that wind was cold and smelled winter in it .,
going to have mil and bil here all weekend . isnt life great :( .. the guys are going off sat all day and im gonna have mil in my hair , where is my son do u know where he went did he go home without me , waa waa waaaaaaaaa . then repeat again . where is my son ?? etc ec etc ........ hopin my daughter will keep her gma . but i highly doubt that ll happen . so i think its a zannax weekend .
selfishsibling - am happythat u hired a caregiver to hang around ur mom . yes if shes toxi i wouldnt want that around me either . i be zoomin to bobbie s boat . sit in the chair and watch the train go by ohh its a wonderful feeling , jump up and wave and wave ! i remmy when i was a lit girl the guys on the train would throw candies ! wait till they zoom by and i go runnin and gather up candies . great feeling .
am missing christina , sniff , love reading her post , shes a wonderful person . shes my angel :-) .... one day shes going to make me gator tails . love u girl ! xoxox
flex - love that kentucky joke . made me smile .
i am doing ok . just dont have a routine , its all screwed up . id sit in garage for 2 or 3 hrs , smokin , slurpin coffee and texting my bro . on my phone i have my dad s picture as background . i get to see him anytime i reach for the phone . id kiss my dad and hug him and run my fingers on his face . gawd i miss my daddy . talk to him on my phone , gives me some comferts , so he is with me always cuz the phone is with me always .
was suppose to help a neighbor with her greenhouse , but its holdin me back . i dont wanna work . i dont wanna handle her moneyor anybodys money if they buy flowers , i told her it could come up short and i dont want to feel bad or her thinkin i rip her off . or short change a custmers or gave custmers toomuch change back . no money handling fr me , if its my money yep sure but its not my money and i aint touching it ,. when i was young a friend of mind had some money she didnt have a pocket and told me to put it in my pocket so i kept her money in left pocket and i had my money in right pocket , i had no idea how much she had i justtook it and put in my left pocket . well when time came she said oh i need my money , i reach in left pocket and gave em to her , she flat out said im missin 20 bucks . uhhh ok i reach in to feel around its empty , i ck my right pocket yep those were my money . she said well 20 bucks are missing ! i had to tell her i dont have em . well ever since then i refuse to hold anybodys money or handle anybodys money . fk that . it did hurt me and made me feel like i stole her money but i didnt ...
i could have to be a cashier but nanana , that time ruined me , never wanna handle money if its not mine . so i explain that to my neighbor , she said oh i understand but it be ok ,i said nope it wont be ok . not doing it sorrryyieee .
next friday i ll help her unload the truck full of flowers but aint touchin the cashier ,
ok i need to zoom to cvs and then go to farm store to see if they have any baby ducks , wanna give em to my neighbor , he has a pond . i love watching em swim and havin a blast .
you all have a happy weekend and be meowing at ya all one day soon . love you !! xoxo
So glad you did this. Cattails