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Flex~ You are in my thoughts and i also have a candle going for you and your mom.!! Hugs!
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Diane: I don't know what is happening with you and your mom right now, but I am just praying that your mom is at peace and resting quietly. That's how I spent the last 2 days of my dad's life, sitting by his side and holding his hand while he gradually left this world. He was peaceful and non-responsive. I held his hand and every once in a while, I would lean down and whisper in his ear and tell him how much I loved him and what a great dad he was.

I know your mom was such a loving presence in your life and that is what you are remembering right now. That's the good part, because that is how she would want you to think of her and that is who she would want you to miss.

Your mom has suffered through so much with her illness and dementia and you have felt every pain and anguish during this journey. If it is possible, be by her side with a spiritual openness to what is transpiring. I feel kind of stupid saying this because maybe the time isn't right, but you and she are experiencing a rebirth and you are her faithful witness. You continue to be by her side as you have always been. You have witnessed her love for you, the disease that claimed her, her decline and now her impending passing. You are the constant in her history. Perfection was never required, just the humanness of your love and desire to care for her. You have done it all in spite of the cost to yourself. That's enough. If you can, be grateful that the time of her suffering is coming to a close. Be quite in spirit and be by her side. Your job is done, but you will remain her faithful witness until the end. It is an honored position and you have earned it. I always felt those last two days with my dad was a holy time. I knew he was with God even before he passed.

I hope I have not overstepped in this post. Sending you and your dear mother love and the blessing of God's white and loving light.

Love you, Cat.
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I'm sorry Flex....I will pray for you and your mom. God Bless.
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Well said Cattails. I think you spoke beautifully...great way to think about it.
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Flex,

Thinking of you and your mom today. I lost my dad 6 days ago. You're right where you're supposed to be. You're mom is so lucky to have you with her. I'll check back and see how you're doing.
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Peace to you and your mom D. Love Jen
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Good Morning Crew,

Eyerish, good to see you and I hope you are coping! It's so tough...

Diane! Your time right now brings back the memories of my mom and the last days. Ow Ow. Love to you.

Cat! a beautiful post!

Jen! Did you get to try that software yet? I am looking forward to hearing you go: WooHoo this works!

Cuz! How are you feeling? Are you back to being yourself yet?

Meanwhile! Austin! DEEF!! Rip! Kuli! MAME!!! Everybody!

I will check in a little later to see how everyone is.

lovbob
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Flex we are with you in spirit-I was with my Mom the last week of her life and next to her when she passed-I was not the one she would have liked to be there at the end but God is in control after all.
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Good Morning.
I am praying for dtflex, hope you are coping ok, love n prayers!

Reading these posts I have noticed how eloquent and beautiful some of you all write. I have a difficult time putting converting a thought into words...I never was much a writer, less it be for business letters. well done to those!!!

I am waking up today sitting with a cup o joe, staring not only at ma but the big beautiful Pacific Ocean!!!! I spent Thurs with my friend, then we took one of her sons, 12, out to the beach with us. She, her husbanc and y yo son will come stay over with us tonite! We are going to have a big seafood feast and I am making a pot of clam chowder up too...there Is a hot tub n grill on the deck. I made these plans when mom got hurt...I was so scared and emotional. I almost lost her and thought we have been stuck home n miserable for years....I wanna do something niice with her b4 tooo late, and bills be damned. So far beside a minor car accident we are having a great time. I brought my files on ma try get all our budgets n needs organized too, in a relaxed atmosphere.

So prayers and hugs out to all of you, May the powers that be make your day the best it can be! Stay Strong,1luv!!
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Flex-thinking of you and praying for you and your mom. Hugs!
Eyerishlass-so sorry for your loss. Hugs to you!
Juju-glad you have this time! Be sure to relax!
Msdaizy, Jen, Austin, Bobbie, Cat, Meanwhile, Linda, Sharon-Hello!
Me? Feeling very lonely & isolated in a house full of busy people.... Just another day in the life. Hope you are all having a better day. Mame
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eyerishlass, sorry for your loss. Diane, hope you are holding up. The losses and changes in our lives all require adjustment. Give yourself time. In fact there is no timetable. I still visit Sam's grave almost every week. Sometimes Indio goes with me. That is one of the things I love about Indio, he doesn't seem to mind, even after year and half. Indio brought me a keyboard today. Since I'm still laid up with my broken foot. I haven't played the piano since I was a kid. But, it is giving me something to do inside.
Mame, can't some of those busy people take time to give you a break? Maybe you should get up early, leave a note, and just take off someplace for the day.
Cat, you said that so well.
Jen, what are you writing now? Bobbi, the boat really sounds like you are whipping it into shape. Take care everyone. Love Shirley
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I am not writing just now, got a sinus head ache so bad I laid on my moms bed and cried. While she was out picking up sinus meds for me...If I tried to hug her, which I wanted to do, she get really upset and push me away. Sometimes it is really painful here. 42 in July, indigent, live at home, mom really doesn't like me as a person and I don't want to be away from her ever...Really really sad.
thought about Diane, losing her mom and it about kills me to even think about it. I hope D is OK...

bobbie I have loaded the site stuff and signed up but just not tried to use it yet...?
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Oh Jen,
mama used to push me away too. I know that it hurts.
You are a sweet girl and the things that our parents go through I guess we don't understand and I guess they don't understand what it does to us.

Hope that sinus headach goes away with the meds your mom gets.

I'm glad you have loaded that software! Hope you love it and it helps take you out of your head and into a world that treats you well.

I have texted back and forth with Diane and she is doing her best. All is calm and peaceful right now.

Shirley! What kind of music did you play when you were a kid? I taught piano for awhile. Really enjoyed it but stopped teaching in the mid 80's.

Mame! Are you still feeling alone and isolated?
That is unjust with a house full of people who obviously can't see that you are suffering. I like Shirley's idea of getting up early and leaving a note. You can get yourself into the movies and then sneak around and watch 2 or 3 more!!

Juju! Love to look out onto the ocean and I love the Pacific. The guy who named it caught it on a good day.

Eyerish! how are you coping?

I have been wondering about Kuli and a bunch of our tribe and hope everyone is well.

There is a big squall about to move over us.
Free boat wash and leak check.

The Cat is stretched out on my bed doing a Superman.

Deef!! love you and hope you are feeling better. I know that you work way too hard for 3 people let alone 1.

Rain is here... off to dog down the portholes.

Love all you guys way more than you'll ever know.
lovbob
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msdaizy!
How long has it been for you and your loss? It hasn't been that long but I can't remember exactly.
Here's hoping that you are making your way through the days and sleeping through the nights.
lovbob
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Hey bobbie. I am looking at autopsy photos on line here. getting morbid I guess. Turn em off take more sinus pills...what does it matter.

glad Diane is "OK" hope she isn't alone, let her know we are thinking of her... Jen
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Hi everyone: How about a little change of pace. Cuz does jokes. I do nature. We have about 20 elk next to our house right now. Fields are full of white daisies and the elk are munching away. Right up my alley. Top bar hives, which is as close to nature as the bees can find in the wild and no interference. The goal is to let the bees do what only they know how to do best. Our job is to provide the best habitat for them. I'm excited. It's a small thing, but I love the thought that something I can do will promote life and a diversified life for bees, which will make them more genetically stronger and better able to thrive. I'll keep you posted

Just know that I love you all and am keeping my heart with yours.

Cat
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Hey bobbie Doing real great. Took Mike out fishing this afternoon late. He did alright but his legs hurt real bad. The left one that they took the veins out for the bypass really bothers him bad. Can't feel nothing from thre knee down and it just burns. He has to see the doc next week and I am going with him to see what they have to say. Love ya Cuz
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Hey, WTF, I guess I left out a sentence. We went to a bee class today. Top bar hives which is really a natural means for bees to live. Maybe the rest of the post will make sense now.
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Good morning all. Thanks Meanwhile and Bobbie-some morning I may just do that! I was thinking that after Church I would go out and buy some flowers to plant in my gardens. I will already be out of the house-so why rush back?! Hubby stays with mom while I go every Sunday. I just need to get out. Thanks.
Jen, my heart aches for you. Knowing what you have shared in the past about your family life, I can only imagine your mom must be in a lot of pain too as you are. It is sad that she cannot take a hug from you or return one. I can only imagine how wonderful it would be for both of you to share one. My prayers to you and your mom.
Cuz-so great of you to go to Dr with bro. Everyone needs an advocate! Hope the healing process will bring feeling to his leg and the pain will stop!
Cat-love your nature stories. I am very in tune with nature here-but it is mostly birds. Can't imagine having all those elk in my yard! I love it when the deer visit-there were 3 all winter who visited regularly. My dog used to chase everything but he is getting old and deaf and possibly his eyes are going bad? Cause he frequently lets the squirrels and groundhogs have the run of the yard which he never did before. I just enjoy watching it all.
Hey Bobbie-Free boat wash and leak check! How did it go? Hope no leaks popped up! Glad you are in touch with Diane.
Miss hearing from Deef but do understand!
Hello to everyone else out there! Hope you all have a decent Sunday. Mame
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I'm sorry. That is horrible.
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Hi crew,
Thank you for all your prayers, hugs and encouragement. You all are my support since my family has been diappointing again. My friend from Savannah had a port put in on Friday to start her chemo on Monday. That didn't stop her and her husband from visiting me and mom. My sister hasn't called since Thursday and my brother visits for about 15 minutes every other day. As for the grandsons, nothing. My family has been a major disappointment to me and mom. Thank God I have James beside me. Family from Trinidad have been calling and parying for mom. I've told my mom it is okay to go and that I will be okay. Yes, even though I'm 50 she thinks she has to protect and care for me. She knows our immediate family has abandoned us.
Mom is pale but peaceful right now. She was crying earlier. She drank her Carnation Instant Breakfast this morning, but that has been it. She stops breathing for about 20-30 seconds quite frequently. I apologize if my thoughts are scattered, but I wanted to let you know we are still hanging in there together.
Love to you all, Diane
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I'm sorry your family is such a disappointment, not just to you, but your mom too. It's shameful. Sending you and your mom my prayers.

Love you, Diane.
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Cat, thanks for telling us about the elk and the white flowers, I can just picture it. Jen, my mom is also distant, and untouchable. Sometimes I think she would like to be different, but she doesn't know how. Diane, so glad you have James there. I know you are under a lot of stress right now.
Bobbi, I bet you were a fun piano teacher. My piano teacher was a crabby old great aunt, and all she would let me play was church music or music from the 30's and 40's.
Mame, hope you got some lovely flowers to set out.
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Thank you mame and meanwhile. I agree, just a lot of pain all round.

Diane we are all thinking and praying for you and your mom here I am sure. glad you have some friends close...

Clearing grandmas old cards and letters out, they can be recycled now so maybe that is why I kept em so long...

gonna go walk Monty...


Have a good week everyone. Jen
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Flex~I am so sorry for all you are going through. It is so sad when family just sits by the wayside not supporting, calling or visiting. I am thinking and praying for you, your mom and your family. Blessing to you!
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Brushing your teeth with Preparation H? We all make mistakes...
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flex We have you and your mother in our prayers. HUGS
luvCuz
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Hugs to all you caregivers
luvCuz
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Sorry but I had to do this. BOAT TIME FOR ME. Maybe this will be an incentive to go see my long lost cousin bobbie. Luv ya bobbie
Cuz
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I am laughing at Loki's post about using preparation H for brushing teeth. I burned myself on hot lights at work once and the young girl I was working with, went and me Aloe gel to put on it. A couple days later I noticed it was Preparation H with Aloe. I laughed and teased her about it about it for days... it worked on my burn so I couldn't complain, Lol!!
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