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By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Thank you Jen!! It does not sound good right now as it is inoperable. Prayerfully the ports they insert on Monday for chemo will reduce the size of the tumor so they can operate to remove it. The miracle will be if my sil's other two boys get screened now. They must follow through as colon cancer in young people is almost always heredity and without screening, it is diagnosed too late.
Jen, I was so excited for you getting the bus pass and being able to go the Y to swim. Even though it is cold outside, the warm pool must feel wonderful.
Sharynmarie- Please keep us updated on your niece! I'm thinking of her often and her story hits very close to home because we are the same age and both have 12 year old children. How is she coping right now? How about her child? Definitely praying that chemo will shrink the tumor so they can operate and remove every last bit of the tumor!
Aishamama~Thank you, I will keep everyone updated. For the time being, my niece is still working on getting her thoughts on this in focus. As you can understand, it has been such a big blow to the family following her brother's passing. I should have more info the week after the colonoscopy where they will insert ports for chemo, then on Thursday they will meet with the dr. to discuss options for treatment. Thank you again for the prayers...Hugs to all of you!!
Grossed out by my BF's mother leaving the bathroom door open. It is a first floor bathroom, in plain sight of the main living space. She knows better, because when we go out to a restaurant, she will lock the stall door. Also grossed out by the smells in the first floor bathroom. I always use the second floor bathroom at my boyfriends house.
Merry stinkness to us all I guess...almost over...
Peanut Brittle anyone? turned out good...
have a safe holiday all.
Think of you Sharyn and lit a candle for you niece...I think of her and her holiday and hope it is a blissful and happy as it can be for her and all of your family...
Wishing you all a Merry Christmas-we may get some snow tonight-hope all of you are not feeling to much pressure getting the house ready-I am but got a good supply of beer and wine in the house-the house will not be perfect but if it was it would confuse my family-they would think they were in the wrong house.
Peanut brittle a favorite! I will be glad when Christmas is over too. Saw mom yesterday. We went for a walk with the dog. Sis will bring her over my house on Christmas for dinner. Thank you Jen!! Wishing everyone a Merry Christmas!
Wishing everyone a very Merry Christmas from Cuz. I have no jokes tonight but thoughts and prayers for all those who are hurting with the loss of a loved one during the Christmas season. May you continue to get all the support and care from the crew of GO. Hugs to all. luvCuz
Yum, peanut brittle, a favorite of mine too. Fixing shrimp, deviled eggs, and chocolate pie for tomorrow. Bought mom 2 new sweaters (she requested), but she will make me return them both. But, she pouts if she doesn't have a package to unwrap. No she isn't getting senile, she has been this crazy forever. I miss Sam so much, he made Christmas special for me for the 1st time in my life. Sorry to be such a humbug. Not really going to be that bad, I do enjoy fixing dinner and invited some friends that already know my mom is crazy. Hope everyone can find something good tomorrow. Love Shirley
Love to all of you and Merry Christmas! We will be going to my brother's as long as mom doesn't have some major problem! Fingers crossed. Going to be a busy day getting her ready and out but it should be fun. One of my sis's stepkids had a baby and they are coming...it will be so nice to have a baby around! Mom will enjoy that too! There will be about 30 of us for dinner and gift exchange! Mom will be exhausted-but I still think it is good for her to see everyone...We will set her up in a little room they have off the family room and let everyone take turns going in to see her. Here's hoping it goes well! Hope everyone gets a moment of peace tomorrow...it is the season of miracles right?! Enjoy what you can! Merry Christmas! Mame
Merry Christmas to the Grossed Out thread and everybody at and on AC! I am finally back on my own boat after 3 weeks of working on the 52' Hatteras that we eventually delivered to Ft Myers, FL. What a trip! The owner is a sweet older guy and by the time we made it to Ft Myers I gently convinced him to sell his boat. This life is not for everybody. His boat is one of those that takes a thousand bucks of fuel every day you run it and he just wasn't ready for that. Takes a different income bracket for that crazy!
Anyway, we had the trip of a lifetime, used the lock system to cross Lake Okeechobee to get to the west coast of Florida and had a lot of fun along the way.
I have tried to keep up with everyone's story and the story that is so sad is Sharynmarie and her niece. I wish you and your family all the hope you need to get through this trying time.
Austin! A house full of beer and wine sure is a good thing! Hope you catch a nice Christmas buzz!
Jen! So glad you are swimming! What good progress in making you feel better.
Cuz! Jeeze what a hard time you had and so glad you are feeling better. I hope that Mike will be ok. Please keep us posted about him. Merry Christmas to cousins and Aunt Hank.
Cold today on the creek and the pelicans are dive bombing and getting themselves a nice Christmas dinner.
Meanwhile! hope you and Indio and your family have a good Christmas.
Mame! I wish you and the caregivers who are so shot out from the impossible task of making sanity out of an insane situation could come and hang out with me on this boat! Boat drinks! Little umbrellas!
Everybody! I think of so many of you daily and wish the best for all of you.
For the new voices that have visited the thread, yup, it's gross and ass awful to be sure but I, for one, am living proof that there is a life after this soul killing experience. Mine was a total of 5 and a half years of 25/7/365 caregiving and then another 3 years of ptsd and the sadness and hopelessness that goes with all of that.
I have been writing on this site for 4 years and the Grossed Out thread will be 4 years old in February. Don't know what I would have done without you guys.
Merry Christmas to everyone the bird is thawing in cold water -be glad when he is in the oven-my daughter will be down-about an hr. away my son will be here for a while-he works tonight and C will be here-my grandson was here last night-when I count my blessing the folks here are what I am thankful for especially Cap't Bobbie for starting GO and all the great people I have met along the way-hope everyone has as good a day as possible-I am very lucky for having survieved caregiving and having a second chance of being happy-I have a great guy in my life now-the many long bad years are fading into the background.
I actually had to scrub his poop off the toilet twice today, yes merry what ever. the unwrapping of four gifts... took two hours...I just hate him and wish he would just die already...A great aunt visited and made two hilarious comments: 1, "that he was lucky to have two good care givers looking after him, that's why he is doing so good..." and 2, "No one ever thought he'd live so long..." PHAHAHAAAA beh... 2014 on tap...Bring it!!!
Oh Jen-I hear ya! So many people tell me I am taking such good care of mom and that is why she is still here! It is a double edged sword for sure! Sorry you had to scrub poop on Christmas day. It is never-ending....until it does!
Christmas miracles do happen, Mom wasn't mean or rude all day. And I got the sweetest gift from my step daughter. Pictures of her 2 little boys. Wished they lived closer. I would buy them a horse and teach them how to ride.
Still lurking and praying for peace for all here. Bob - I tell people all the time how this thread saved my life more than once. Thank you for all of your words of wisdom and for continuing to stay even when you are moving on with your life. Merry Christmas to all and hoping for a better New Year for all caregivers! Hugs ~ Kuli
Mom is doing the "I think we should go up a size in the garbage cans..." That is an old argument, tied with money worries and I am NOT gonna get pulled back into it so she can shoot me down and say "No" to make herself feel in control...yes, we now put out three times as much garbage because we put out two diaper pails worth of Depends now and good nites bed covers...off everything he sits on (shits on). just do it, don't ask me...
Jen, I bought reusable bed pads for my dad. Cheaper in the long run. They were mostly for urine with my dad though so if it's for both for FP then it is probably best to stay with disposable bed pads.
Yes, Bobbie. I am able to see a few rays of sunshine. Still need to get rid of the house I shared with dad but it's so hard cuz it's the house I grew up in. Just about the time I think I am ok with it, I start to think of my life without it and feel like it's the last piece of dad I will have to give up. Thanks for always thinking of me, of us, those of us at the (almost) start of this thread. I hope you had a very Merry Christmas and that the New Year brings you many, many good things and happy memories. Hugs~Kuli
Hey everyone!!! Mom is gone but I went and did what I said I never would ever do again!!! Yes, I'm caring for my sister's mom in law since September and even though she is across town in her own home, I'm still tied down, just not as mush as I was with Mom! My BIL is very appreciative and does pay me for my service, at least I don't have to try and find a part time job just yet. Blanche is 96 and has blockages in both of her coratid arteries which caused a mini stroke last year. her friends all thought she had dementia, but it's damage caused by the stroke and loss of blood flow to the brain. She seems worse when flustered because she can't say the right word when speaking, plus she is pretty deaf, which adds to the confusion. I have known her for over 40 years. She has been a widow for most of those years and took very good care of herself. Now she can't deal with paperwork, bills, etc. So I bring her lunch or dinner every other day and spend some time with her. I helped her do 50 X-0mas cards! She was in a panic because she couldn't find her card list, so we mailed cards out as she received them. Lots of friends and church people that check on her, thus the 50 cards. So I went from Mom passing, to spending a week in Virginia with my sister, to canning salsa, jams, jellies, to getting things done for 2 craft shows and taking care of Blanche all at the same time!! I thought when Mom was gone I would have more time but that hasn't happened!!! seems like there aren't enough hours in the day to accomplish everything. I still have a lot of Mom's things to get rid of. My youngest brother is headed for a divorce and will be coming to live in Mom's apartment until he can get back on his feet. Getting that cleaned out for him will be a chore in itself! I have pretty much turned Mom's place into a craft area for me the past 3 months. I also sleep there because of my restless legs. My sleep habits keep my husband up and it's just easier for me. Now I have to clean my storage room on the second floor to turn it into a craft room and place to keep all the supplies I have in Mom's and my apartment. I keep a lot in my TV/sitting room and will need the space for a daybed for me to sleep on. Right now I just want to get past the holidays and get to organizing and moving and throwing away things I no longer use. Gee, I wonder if my husband falls into that category! Yes, he still lays around on the couch all day napping and watching TV!!! It's his idea of being retired!!! Anyway, I guess it's true, once a caregiver always a caregiver!!! It's so hard to say no when someone needs us! So that's what I have been up to. Not snubbing the thread on purpose, just hardly have time to breathe some days. It's good to see everyone is coping. I know how hard it can get and just knowing you are not alone is the biggest help. Kuli!!! Jen!!! Meanwhile!!! Mame!!! Book!! Sharon!! Austin!! And most of all BOBBIE!!!!!!! I apologize now for those I didn't mention by name. I'm short on brains lately but know that I think of you all! Love Deef!!
DEEF!! You are the family angel and there you have it. I can only imagine how difficult it has to be with your extended family and tha giant heart of yours! It's good to see from you and I hope you continue to find some time to keep us up to date.
Kuli! I know the pain of the house you grew up in. One day at a time.
Jen! sux.
Mame! Meanwhile! Austin! Where's Juju? Sharynmarie how are you doing?
Happy Birthday to me and a little shin dig up at the marina clubhouse this evening that involves margaritas.
Happy Birthday Bobbi. Have a as many margaritas as you want. Deef, Kuli, so good to hear from you. Sorry you have to sell the house, Kuli. I'm leasing the house my husband and I had in town. The extra income helps, and I don't have to completely let go of the place yet.
Thanks Shirley. It's a pot luck and they told me to bring a rotisserie chicken from wallymart and I have to go back and get another one because we are eating the first one now. Viking Style. Hey… what can I say…
It was a hot day in Minnesota . Helga hung the wash out to dry and then went into town to pick up her dry cleaning.
"Gootness, its hotter den hell today ", she mused to herself as she walked down Main Street .
She passed a tavern and thought to herself, "Vy nodt."
She walked in, and quietly took a seat at the end of the bar.
The bartender walked up to her and said; "and what would you like to drink today".
"Vell Ya know" Helga said in a timid voice, "I don't usually go into da bars, but today I vill make an exception. It iss zo hot, I tink I vill have myself a beer".
The bartender smiled at Helga and asked;" Anheuser Busch?"
Helga blushed and said; "Vell, it's fine tanks, und how's yur viener"
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Jen, I was so excited for you getting the bus pass and being able to go the Y to swim. Even though it is cold outside, the warm pool must feel wonderful.
Hi to Bobbie and rip and deef and mame and cuz and lil and book and cat and ladee and every one here at AG. Have a Merry Christmas All!
Peanut Brittle anyone? turned out good...
have a safe holiday all.
Think of you Sharyn and lit a candle for you niece...I think of her and her holiday and hope it is a blissful and happy as it can be for her and all of your family...
Love Jen
luvCuz
Sorry to be such a humbug. Not really going to be that bad, I do enjoy fixing dinner and invited some friends that already know my mom is crazy. Hope everyone can find something good tomorrow. Love Shirley
We will be going to my brother's as long as mom doesn't have some major problem! Fingers crossed. Going to be a busy day getting her ready and out but it should be fun. One of my sis's stepkids had a baby and they are coming...it will be so nice to have a baby around! Mom will enjoy that too! There will be about 30 of us for dinner and gift exchange! Mom will be exhausted-but I still think it is good for her to see everyone...We will set her up in a little room they have off the family room and let everyone take turns going in to see her. Here's hoping it goes well!
Hope everyone gets a moment of peace tomorrow...it is the season of miracles right?! Enjoy what you can! Merry Christmas! Mame
I am finally back on my own boat after 3 weeks of working on the 52' Hatteras that we eventually delivered to Ft Myers, FL. What a trip!
The owner is a sweet older guy and by the time we made it to Ft Myers I gently convinced him to sell his boat. This life is not for everybody.
His boat is one of those that takes a thousand bucks of fuel every day you run it and he just wasn't ready for that. Takes a different income bracket for that crazy!
Anyway, we had the trip of a lifetime, used the lock system to cross Lake Okeechobee to get to the west coast of Florida and had a lot of fun along the way.
I have tried to keep up with everyone's story and the story that is so sad is Sharynmarie and her niece. I wish you and your family all the hope you need to get through this trying time.
Austin! A house full of beer and wine sure is a good thing! Hope you catch a nice Christmas buzz!
Jen! So glad you are swimming! What good progress in making you feel better.
Cuz! Jeeze what a hard time you had and so glad you are feeling better. I hope that Mike will be ok. Please keep us posted about him. Merry Christmas to cousins and Aunt Hank.
Cold today on the creek and the pelicans are dive bombing and getting themselves a nice Christmas dinner.
Meanwhile! hope you and Indio and your family have a good Christmas.
Mame! I wish you and the caregivers who are so shot out from the impossible task of making sanity out of an insane situation could come and hang out with me on this boat! Boat drinks! Little umbrellas!
Everybody! I think of so many of you daily and wish the best for all of you.
For the new voices that have visited the thread, yup, it's gross and ass awful to be sure but I, for one, am living proof that there is a life after this soul killing experience.
Mine was a total of 5 and a half years of 25/7/365 caregiving and then another 3 years of ptsd and the sadness and hopelessness that goes with all of that.
I have been writing on this site for 4 years and the Grossed Out thread will be 4 years old in February.
Don't know what I would have done without you guys.
lovbob
lovbob
2014 on tap...Bring it!!!
I hope you are doing better and are there any rays of sunshine in your life?
Hello to all the caregivers here and everywhere. Hope things are at least tolerable.
lovbob
He fell again last night, took twenty minutes to get him up and mom had to "change him" later...yeah, it's just house room....
Wish the snow and ice would go away,so I can get back to the Y, I am just not gonna break my ankle again!!!
Have a good weekend everyone...like we have weekends! Jen
Blanche is 96 and has blockages in both of her coratid arteries which caused a mini stroke last year. her friends all thought she had dementia, but it's damage caused by the stroke and loss of blood flow to the brain. She seems worse when flustered because she can't say the right word when speaking, plus she is pretty deaf, which adds to the confusion. I have known her for over 40 years. She has been a widow for most of those years and took very good care of herself. Now she can't deal with paperwork, bills, etc.
So I bring her lunch or dinner every other day and spend some time with her. I helped her do 50 X-0mas cards! She was in a panic because she couldn't find her card list, so we mailed cards out as she received them. Lots of friends and church people that check on her, thus the 50 cards.
So I went from Mom passing, to spending a week in Virginia with my sister, to canning salsa, jams, jellies, to getting things done for 2 craft shows and taking care of Blanche all at the same time!!
I thought when Mom was gone I would have more time but that hasn't happened!!! seems like there aren't enough hours in the day to accomplish everything. I still have a lot of Mom's things to get rid of. My youngest brother is headed for a divorce and will be coming to live in Mom's apartment until he can get back on his feet. Getting that cleaned out for him will be a chore in itself! I have pretty much turned Mom's place into a craft area for me the past 3 months. I also sleep there because of my restless legs. My sleep habits keep my husband up and it's just easier for me.
Now I have to clean my storage room on the second floor to turn it into a craft room and place to keep all the supplies I have in Mom's and my apartment. I keep a lot in my TV/sitting room and will need the space for a daybed for me to sleep on.
Right now I just want to get past the holidays and get to organizing and moving and throwing away things I no longer use. Gee, I wonder if my husband falls into that category! Yes, he still lays around on the couch all day napping and watching TV!!! It's his idea of being retired!!!
Anyway, I guess it's true, once a caregiver always a caregiver!!! It's so hard to say no when someone needs us!
So that's what I have been up to. Not snubbing the thread on purpose, just hardly have time to breathe some days. It's good to see everyone is coping. I know how hard it can get and just knowing you are not alone is the biggest help.
Kuli!!! Jen!!! Meanwhile!!! Mame!!! Book!! Sharon!! Austin!! And most of all BOBBIE!!!!!!!
I apologize now for those I didn't mention by name. I'm short on brains lately but know that I think of you all!
Love Deef!!
You are the family angel and there you have it.
I can only imagine how difficult it has to be with your extended family and tha giant heart of yours!
It's good to see from you and I hope you continue to find some time to keep us up to date.
Kuli! I know the pain of the house you grew up in. One day at a time.
Jen! sux.
Mame! Meanwhile! Austin! Where's Juju?
Sharynmarie how are you doing?
Happy Birthday to me and a little shin dig up at the marina clubhouse this evening that involves margaritas.
lovbob
It's a pot luck and they told me to bring a rotisserie chicken from wallymart and I have to go back and get another one because we are eating the first one now.
Viking Style.
Hey… what can I say…
lovbob
"Gootness, its hotter den hell today ", she mused to herself as she walked down Main Street .
She passed a tavern and thought to herself, "Vy nodt."
She walked in, and quietly took a seat at the end of the bar.
The bartender walked up to her and said; "and what would you like to drink today".
"Vell Ya know" Helga said in a timid voice, "I don't usually go into da bars, but today I vill make an exception. It iss zo hot, I tink I vill have myself a beer".
The bartender smiled at Helga and asked;" Anheuser Busch?"
Helga blushed and said; "Vell, it's fine tanks, und how's yur viener"