Are you sure you want to exit? Your progress will be lost.
Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
✔
I acknowledge and authorize
✔
I consent to the collection of my consumer health data.*
✔
I consent to the sharing of my consumer health data with qualified home care agencies.*
*If I am consenting on behalf of someone else, I have the proper authorization to do so. By clicking Get My Results, you agree to our Privacy Policy. You also consent to receive calls and texts, which may be autodialed, from us and our customer communities. Your consent is not a condition to using our service. Please visit our Terms of Use. for information about our privacy practices.
Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
Miz, have that one here too. Mom has to ask him over and over, are you in pain Daddy/ like talking to a small child who can't tell you if they are in pain, or sick? I don't know which is worse. That or a hypochondriac who is screaming they are gonna die when nothing is wrong. It's a toss up...
RAMP update: Inspector came and said you can't use screw pull em out and use nails...and the no slip covering suggested isn't usable use something else...So more hours more money more..."it will be done ____________." Hmm Hmm what ever...
This morning my wife's anxiety and depression problems got the best of her which I and my son could see coming. Along with suicidal wishes, she had plans, detailed plans with such a great sense of hopelessness that no motivation existed to the contrary. So, we contacted her therapist to see her today after just seeing her Tuesday morning when we talked about how this is a tough time of year for her and how often she's been in a psych ward near Thanksgiving and so her therapist wanted to see her twice a week for three weeks and told her if the idea of seeing her mother was too much for Thanksgiving that she gave her permission to not to go. (Her mom is to mental health what Darth Vader is to Star Wars.) My wife's therapist met with her today, asked her psych to come in and the 4 of us agreed that my wife needed the psych ward for a week with all that is going on with her both physically and psychologically. This is one of the longest strands of time for her not to be hospitalized. The irony is that the last time was 32 months ago when our oldest turned 18 and now our youngest will be 18 on Monday. I'm sorry she is in the shape, but she needs to be there and like my son told her, she does not need to view this as a failure on her part. Frankly, the atmosphere of the house already feels different.
LOL bobbie. I can't imagine having to stick my thumb up my butt. I can't even stand a small wedgie. I don't care who is behind me i have to pull it out. Or slyly stick my hand down the back of my pants and pull it out. I know, TMI.
I got home from work and the caregiver told me Mom had been having chest pains and trouble breathing and that it went away after awhile. Why did she not call me? I don't understand. I would leave work in a heartbeat for that. She says it doesn't hurt now but it's so hard to tell with her. Sometimes I'm not sure she knows she's hurting. With the dementia and all. I want to know right then and there if her chest is hurting for pete's sake. Did I mention I see stupid people? I am so tired. Gotta get to bed. God grant me the...
My great-Grandfather was Italian, his Mother was from Naples. He used to say you never joke about the Mafia...I hope what ever it is it is old news and goes away soon. It wasn't your life! It still isn't..I know they don't even comb yer hair thing..I used to be fussier now some days I just don't care.
Ramp progress...well, lets say it is framed so well it will be here for the next ice age. but it still has no platform ON IT! I think that is coming, They date it was supposed to be done just keeps moving back...When it is done it is done I guess...
Almost wish I had taken more care of my appearance when the seriously cute Chinese Delivery Boy came last night. A very welcome change from leftovers!
Bloodtest this morning see when his Dilantin is now...Could be worse could be Coumadin..Now there was a winner for most irritating fiddly prescription known to man...Grandma was on that...unreal that was...
Guys, when I said that my mother was suspected to be a Mafia boss I was not very far from truth... She is being investigated by a District Attorney! Fun, isn't it? My cousin from Naples went there (Public Prosecutor's Office) and he did not know anything, he just knew that the account will continue to be frozen, and he has an appointment next week with the District Attorney to know what my mother is accused about. He told me that the times to get out of this situation will be necessary very long! Shit, shit, shit. What did that woman do? Did she lead a double life? Seriously, if they won't say anything to my cousin next week and they'll want to see us, I will go there (Naples) with my mother and a big box of documents concerning her health, our financial situation and so on and I hope that the DA is not an asshole. Meanwhile the only positive thing is that my family is helping me a lot - cousins, uncles and so on - and my brother and sister in law call me 1000 times a day. This thing has improved my mood a lot, because I can't deny that I am glad I am not alone in dealing with this mess - which is a huge mess. Yes, Bobbie, it is retroactive - if the situation will be cleared in 6 months, let's say, they will have to give me back all the money. The question is that I'll have to survive these (theoretical) 6 months (which could be 6 years) . I shall have to make debts, debts, debts with all the family, which I am not happy about, and work even more than I do now, to be as independent as possible. I'll keep you posted... A funny thing happened this morning. Daniela (helper) and I are spending every morning in offices, in order to do everything is necessary to fight against this mess. This morning we were in a hurry because we had 100 things to do, so we put on the first thing we found in the closet, we did not comb our hair, we seemed two witches. My mother was perfect. Perfectly combed, sunglasses, lipstick, nice jacket.... When Daniela's husband saw this incredible group, he said his wife. "Look at yourself and Rossella, you are terrible. Look at Gabriella (my mother), she is all tidy and cute!" !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Bobbie girlfriend you are the glu that keep us stuck togetner--Miz do not worry about the house they are more concerned about her care which we know is the best-we had a nurse complain about my housekeeping and sent in a social worker that liked us and said it was a big impeovement from a year ago and that shut her up for good.
Rosella, Hope all gets straightened out very soon regarding the account & accessable. Do you write the sub-titles or scripts for voice-overs?
Miz, You are the only one that can stop your pattern of worry & guilt. Strongholds were meant to be broken and overcome. Please stop beating yourself up.
Bobbie, Ha, we had a cat that would fetch too. Obsessive about it! Her favorite was the plastic lid rings from the milk jugs. I'd throw one down the stairs & she would fly after it, bouncing off the walls on her way down & right back up to do it again. We have a photo of her in flight on the stairs when she was a kitten....looks like she has a busted A frame. Liked the advice on breaking bad habits.lol
Ted, Some attorneys work pro-bono & something simple like a will, POA, etc. would be a breeze for them. Check your yellow pages, local elder organizations, etc. for pro-bono & low cost elder attorneys. Well worth the effort.
Linda, Hope your beloved pa is pain free soon.
Tenn, I'm not very social but would love to see you in action at a party with an arrogant uppity crowd. That would be a hoot. I would love to hear about your surgical expertise around a bunch of snoots. Ha! I try to behave myself these days but used to really enjoy taking the shallow down a few notches.
Mom's new treatment is going very well & she is still behaving after 4 months with only one bad incident. I am sooooo grateful!!! Back to work for me....editing & yard clean-up. Have a blessed day all!
Miz, we will never get sick of you. You are such a dear person. We love your cats and we love also (respectfully) your husband. Don't worry, everybody here vents all the time! I am fighting with the Italian State. I will write back tonight.
Thanks so much everyone for your support. I know that nothing can be done right now to make it better but just getting on here to vent does help. I hope you guys don't get sick of me just bitching. I can't even laugh right now. Gots to take Mom to the dentist this morning and I pretty sure that's gonna be a fight. Then I have to hurry back and get ready for work. The place where we get our caregivers called this morning and said they were sending a nurse here to check on things (routine). I'm so tired and they call at the last minute like that. Sometimes it's just too much. I feel so weak like this should not be this difficult. I did get her hair washed this morning. An old neighbor is visiting this weekend. Just a short visit. Like probably an hour. I already feel like I'll be judged by how the house looks or how Mom looks or what I'm doing, etc. etc. etc. K, I'll stop now.
I'm glad to see that Bobbie FINALLY checked in. I thought Secret Sister would check in after the election,but maybe she is wrapped up with the big election now-its going to be a meanie.I hope everything is going well for Pirate and thats the reason we haven't heard from her.Thanks Georgia for the consideration for lil' tenny. This is some big testing week where they are measuring what they have learned and what they are supposelly capable of learning,so I've run her off of the computer this week. We watch very little T.V. so she's not as exposed as some city kids are. She's at the age where we are having alot of those talks. I wish we had a real good public school around here. Alot of people send their kids to private school or home school. Where does our tax dollars go-wouldn't it be nice to have a say to where our dollars are spent. Alot of those kids seem to think a persons worth is based on their address and income,I told her if I see that she is evolving to that mind set I will find her a school with people not so materalistic. 80 or 90 percent of the school are doctors and lawyers kids, We are the only farm family in the whole school,if I'm at a party and they are acting a little too uppity,I break into talking about castrating hogs.Just want them to know I've done minor surgery myself-I am a person of many talents.The kids want to know all about farm work-parents not so much. J's grand dad seems like he could use my hog experience.Kids had a assignment to write about a famous American hero-mine chose Harriet Tubman thought that was pretty interesting.I would like to take her to Harpers Ferry some day.That is the only time I have stepped on Northern soil-I walked across the bridge to Maryland touched the ground and ran back to my side.Guess I better go do something its suppose to be pretty and warm today and then another cold blast.
Kuli and Linda, I hope that your fathers get better and I hope that for everyone of our parents the suffering is the minimum, and they all go peacefully when the time arrives! Sometimes we tend to forget that we are not eternal, in any case. We are so overcharged with responsibilities that every time they are not well, we think we have made something wrong! Strange that we develop a kind of God-complex! (this was the daily Rossella's lecture. When you are fed up with my prophet attitude, kick me out, throw virtual tomatoes.) (we have to put on the thread the symbol of "throw a tomato" which is opposite to "give a star") Linda, if you are glad that your cat behaves like a dog, you are not a cat woman! I am a cat woman and I love that they purr and meow all the time! Bobbie you have an amazing cat; really one that happens on a million. Thanks for trying to rise up the mood of your crew! We sure need it. Kuli, I hope our moods don't become synchronized like our periods! That would be a mess! Ok, for me the day begins, you are going to bed, goodnight! Friends of facebook, please write me on the new account (cat with sweater); I can't access anymore to the account with the sheep photo.
Ahoy Capt'n!!! Glad that everything's ok! You are SO funny! I needed that laugh!!! The one about the panty hose reminded me of a joke I heard once...I wrote it out, but remembered that Lil Tenny reads these posts & didn't want to put something in here that she shouldn't read, so I deleted it. OK, the punchline was that her toes curled because she still had her panty hose on...think about it...you'll figure it out! lol LOVE that Kitty will play fetch with you! Started to say that you can take that show on the open road, but it will be more like on the high seas...Interested in a Carnival cruise? I'm sure that the one that's stranded in the ocean could use some quality entertainment! I wouldn't wish that kinda cruise even on my ex! OK, well, maybe my ex! Or his mother! Definitely his mother! LOL Anyway, glad to hear from you & that you're OK!
J, I agree to stick FP in a cab & take him on to day care! You gotta have some YOU time!
Rip is still around, & feeling a little better. Hopefully she'll be back on the thread soon.
Hope everybody else is feeling a little lighter tonight, especially after our laugh fest with Bobbie! Hope everybody will be able to rest well tonight!
Black hole, black hole, stay away... and don't think of coming another day!
Gosh, I really need some sleep! Can ya tell?? Goodnight everybody! : )
Took dad to his first visit at the heart failure clinic tonite. I think this is going to be good for him. Of course, the nurse practitioner started talking about an internal defibrillator again and I said no, he doesn't want one. She backed off right away and said that was fine with her. My dad does have a DNR. He's had a living will for a long time. Didn't mean s*!t when he got into trouble a few years ago but I try to make sure that doesn't happen again. His mind isn't completely gone but his body is a shambles and to resuscitate him would only give him more time in which he can't do what he wants because he has no energy and is in pain most of the time. He's not bitter, just practical. He has me as his POA because he knows I understand the medical stuff. Certainly doesn't make the decision any easier at the time but I have also seen an awful lot of people who should never have been resuscitated or put on life support but the family felt guilty not doing everything to "save" them. I already have discussed this with my daughter who freaks at the thought of me dying but it is a fact of life and I would rather her know my wishes so that she doesn't have to try and decide for me. The trouble is there are no hard and fast rules and sometimes when you think the prognosis is at its worse, the person somehow pulls through and goes on with their life. That's when I know it's all out of our hands and that our only decision is really to leave things in God's or some other higher power's hands. Interesting we found out today that there is a new drug out to replace Coumadin. Expensive without insurance but safer for someone like my dad who has a tendency to fall. Plus no blood tests on a regular basis. Gonna call the insurance company tomorrow and see what his coverage would be. Anyway, I too have been continuing to struggle to stay positive or whatever that feeling is supposed to be. I don't think I've really been positive or up in years so for me it's just staying "even". I do think some of it has to do with the time of year. But you know how they say that women who are together alot end up with having their monthly friend becoming synchronized. Do you think maybe our moods, whether we're men or women, are becoming synchronized in the same way? I sure feel like we all live in the same house but in different rooms sometimes. Just a thought. You have all become my lifeline, my closest friends, my family. I sure hope we all get the relief we need so that we have better days ahead. Love to all.....
hi bobbie ! glad ure safe and sound . happy that you have a best friend right there on the boat with ya , ur kitty thinks shes a dog . my kitty louie thinks hes a dog . i love those kind of cats . cant stand the ones that meow and whine and wanna be petted all times . git scram goo get lost ! gets on my nerve , louie likes to wrestle with me . he has no claws so i dont have to worry about getting sliced up .
am going to look up online about tumors and bladder . poor ole pa . he just dont feel good . whines alot lately . ok brb , xoxo
I am sorry for my absence! I read everything and here we go:
I will not tattoo DNR on my chest. I do have 'in case of sex flip over' tattooed on my ass.
The cat can fetch. No sh!!. I was amazed. The companionway is like a bowling alley and I hurl her catnip toy down there and she'll bring it back up and drop it at my feet and holler until I do it again. I had to rub Aspercreme into my shoulder last night.
It got cold at night down here for a few days. One night I woke up and didn't know wtf was going on until I realized that the cat had crawled under the covers and was putting her cold nose on my nekked leg.
the helm is back together and beautiful and Linda you come and find me!!
All of you! I am here when you are finally ready.
Jen. You really have a hellhole there. can you go anywhere and dump 3 clips out of an AK-47? Kill a stump?
Rossella, i am sorry you are missing out on the benefits that are due you. Anyway that it will be retroactive? financial crap is so stressful. Mom hid everything and i am still dealing with it. Of course I am dealing with it my way which sometimes means I'm not dealing with it at all. Way it goes. I refuse to die because of this stuff!!
GP, Flex, Deef, Cast, Austin! Love you guys. everybody think of the boat.
Where's Rip the Stitch? how you feeling gurl?
Miz!! f**k guilt. i don't know of any way to get someone to step away from it but know that it's compulsive thinking and in order to change obsessive/compulsive behavior you have to make a major change, like every time you have a guilty thought stick your thumb in your butt. Right away this could work out for you because you don't want to stick your thumb in your butt out in public so when you're in public you can't have any guilty thoughts. Now when you're alone and you have a guilty thought and you have to stick your thumb in your butt (are you right or left handed?) make sure that the thumb you are going to use is the same one you would use to hitchhike so you don't screw up and run out of the house with your thumb in your butt thinking you're going to thumb a ride somewhere and all you can end up doing is giving a 'thumbs up' gesture with your free hand while your other thumb is still firmly planted in your butt. In this pose, hopping up and down on one foot is helpful.
If you wear pantyhose be ready for the 'trampoline' effect if you have a quick guilty thought and try to handle it immediately.
(The above is an example of how no one has any good advice for getting rid of guilt) As dumb as it sounds it is actually a switch that you turn off.
Tennessee and Tenny Jr! We are here, the cat and I and I'm sorry that i've been AWOL. I am provisioning the boat and have been working 10 hours a day and crashed the rest. This marina has a car and I am able to get it and bring back stuff for the boat. Big job and it's pooping me out. Nothing compared to what you guys are going through.
Ted! money makes people wierd. Protect yourself accordingly. Crowe! you're ok buddy. remember to breathe and that it's ok to take a break from working it all out. Jam! who did I miss? a bunch.
Disclaimer: Some of this advice may not be professional.
Jen, when the moment will come that he will not be able to clean himself anymore, call a nurse, but she has to be very strong, very tall, broad shoulders, baritone voice, very energetic. I guess he is not going to make comments about worms, with her. He will be good and quiet and he will be afraid of her,,,, Choose carefully!
Shampoo the rugs weekly, but he pees rolls his wheel chair in it and tracks it ALLOVERTHEHOUSE. And I wouldn't wipe his ass for cash money. I draw the line at body care and if my mother doesn't like it she can quit her job and do it herself or put him in a nursing home. He doesn't flirt with her or make disgusting comments about how "worms mate"...whatever. He is washing his hands...good thing, bad sign...gotta go get the wipes....
Austin, as far as my mother is concerned, and other people with the same disease, she can't decide anything anymore. I hope I won't find myself in the situation that I have to decide for her. When she was younger, she would say: "no, no, let me die, I don't want to cause trouble to anyone!!!!" but we knew she was just playing a role (she was acting, in other words) So I am really not sure what my "ex" mother (the one with a working head) would do about "this" herself (the one whose head does not work too well).
oh yes where is bobbie !!!! she must be layin out on the beach too and havin a margaritta ! ohh im gonna go hunt her down and grin and smile right along with her . PARADIES !!!
miz i know how u feel . i too wish i could just lay out on the beach and let someone spoil me rotten with a maragritta and good food ! maybe rub my feet and massages my back , ohh wouldnt that be wonderful ! yep that cost money too , one day at a time , today could be better than yesterday . i always tell myself atleast today is not wosrt than what others are going thru . let me know when ure going to the beach . i ll go with ya . :-) j , i used to give dad his pills , set it on the table and he put it in his mouth on his own , then i m finding pills here and there on the floor , i quit doing that , from then on i put the pills in his mouth sometimes i put applesauce on his spoon and drop few pills at a time and he would take it , pills not lost somewhere on the floor . i have grandkids and my biggest fear grandkids will eat them like its candy . as for crapper . i go with dad and i do the wipin his hindend with rubber gloves and the mess is down to 99 percent , dad tried to wipe his ass once and he fell off the toilet and got a hellva black eye and busted lip . no more pa !!! u say ur house smells like piss . time to shampoo the rugs and all . hope it works . bobbie tried the vingear and says it smells like douch bags , lol took pa to have his test done on his bladder , he has tumors growin on his bladder . we decided to leave it alone . got blood drawn and will see if he has cancer in his prostate . if he does , we will leave that alone too . thats what causin him to have blood in his urine . he hasnt bleed any for a while so will wait till its non stop then we can do something about it . helva day , next weds he will go back to hopsital to remove his cancer skin off his nose . thats gonna be a pain . i am so tired and i have to take my car to the shop to get it winterize am waiting for my daughter to get home so she can give me a ride back home . i think i ll go find bobbie and hop on her boat ....
Please do the talk with your parents wheather they are 91 or 41 talk about what they want done my Mom does not even realize she has a DNR my sister has it - in my state we have a health care prozy which gives permission for one person you choose and also a back-up person who you choose to make decisions if you can not-when Mom had a friend-they are all younger than her die she told me she does not want anything done I said she had to put it in writing she well your sister will do everything and one time she was in the hospital a doc talked her into signing and they put a red dot over her bed and my sister made them take it out of her chart or she would stand there until they did but even when Mom said she did not have one I knew her wishes were to leave it up to my sister so she had made a decision so if you have the talk with them remember what they day so when the time comes you will know-I was so glad my husband had the health care proxy so when his end came there was no guilt on my part. Most very elderly sick people do not survive when someone or hospital personal try to do it anyway.
fart pants doesn't want a DNR. He is terrified of dying, maybe he fears punishment or just being dead or the unknown. It is a profound personnel decision. but we are all gonna die like it deal with it or not...I agree to have the tattoo done, that leaves little question, well in person anyway. they may think you were drunk when you got it, a tatt may not hold up in court...
cleaning to crapper here every time he uses it, glad I got to it before the ramp guy needed a piss....he has been staring at them all day out the back door, yes here is the reason you are building the ramp...and the reason the house reeks of urine...
My dads heart was enlarged,he still was with us mentally-most of the time.I realize ALZ is a whole different cup of tea.One of the nicest things that a young man in ICU said to my dad was,'Sir it was a honor to care for you". I used that young man as my role model in the caregiving arena.I was appalled at how many medical people would come in acting like my dad was deaf and dumb-it was enough to give anyone a bad attitude.
Miz. Why are you worried about getting sued? Have you found someone legal to talk too,to ease your fears.Even the attorneys claimed that my brothers scored high in the ruthless dept.Keep in mind that if a lawyer can't make a100,000 dollars off of you they lose interest-money motivates them. A friend of mine whose dad lived in Ireland passed away three years ago,and there is only cash involved,no property,the lawyer tried everything to tie things up and cause descention between brother and sister.Knowing what I went through she didn't fall for it.The lawyer doesn't want just their hourly wage they want percentage.Almost every attorney wanted a third of my total worth.......Crooks. I hope our captain is o'k.-and she didn't trip on the cat or anything.Where's Pirate-may have to send her after Bob. PAMALA HAPPY MARINES DAY!!!!!
Signing a DNR for a loved one can be a difficult decision, alot of the time because the whole process is in the "unknown" realm. When the time comes it's very hard to let go and most family members who won't let go don't understand that even if God is not ready and sends your loved one home it usually is for a very short time and if they weren't a turnip before, they probably will be now. What kind of "quality of life" is that? Tenn, I'm glad you have had all these years with your Dad; the right decision was made.....but unfortunately the percentage of your type of outcome is very small. In my 25 yrs of EMS I have had 1 family come back to me after resuscitating their Dad to say thank you for giving us the time to say goodbye. What goes on during a resus is not what you see on tv. As for myself, I'm having DNR tattooed on my chest.....:)
My dad would have been dead 40 years earlier if he had listen to the medical professionals.M y dad got a [death sentence] several times over the years,thankfully he never listen to them. My dad died having a x-ray,I had him brought back to life,the medical staff had mixed feelings on my decision. Fortunally their was plenty of compassion and the nay sayers were out numbered by the compassionate. Sadly in our society a persons life has lost value.My brothers tried to stand in my way of saving my dad[they weren't doing any of the work]but what our dad earned seemed to have great importance to them.Did they want my dad to die so they could profit from his death?By the way where the hell is our captain?
Jen, people who are not in our situation are frightened to find themselves in our situation, one day. I think they imagine what we go through. I don't know if you have that impression. I have the impression that we (Bobbie's crew) are going through very bad days, most of us, and we are literally setting each other on foot, minute after minute. The one who is stronger at 5.00 in the afternoon helps the others, then at 6.00 in the afternoon he collapses and someone else helps him! Kind of a chain of bowling pins which fall and get up and fall and get up and so on. These are the famous chains of energy that I am so fond about, and I speak so often about. Where are you "captain, our captain"?
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
When do nails trump screws on a ramp or deck?
Something isn't right.
Common sense?
Sorry you must deal with this.
RAMP update: Inspector came and said you can't use screw pull em out and use nails...and the no slip covering suggested isn't usable use something else...So more hours more money more..."it will be done ____________." Hmm Hmm what ever...
I got home from work and the caregiver told me Mom had been having chest pains and trouble breathing and that it went away after awhile. Why did she not call me? I don't understand. I would leave work in a heartbeat for that. She says it doesn't hurt now but it's so hard to tell with her. Sometimes I'm not sure she knows she's hurting. With the dementia and all. I want to know right then and there if her chest is hurting for pete's sake. Did I mention I see stupid people? I am so tired. Gotta get to bed. God grant me the...
love,
miz
Ramp progress...well, lets say it is framed so well it will be here for the next ice age. but it still has no platform ON IT! I think that is coming, They date it was supposed to be done just keeps moving back...When it is done it is done I guess...
Almost wish I had taken more care of my appearance when the seriously cute Chinese Delivery Boy came last night. A very welcome change from leftovers!
Bloodtest this morning see when his Dilantin is now...Could be worse could be Coumadin..Now there was a winner for most irritating fiddly prescription known to man...Grandma was on that...unreal that was...
Hope everyone is doing well.
I'll keep you posted...
A funny thing happened this morning. Daniela (helper) and I are spending every morning in offices, in order to do everything is necessary to fight against this mess. This morning we were in a hurry because we had 100 things to do, so we put on the first thing we found in the closet, we did not comb our hair, we seemed two witches. My mother was perfect. Perfectly combed, sunglasses, lipstick, nice jacket.... When Daniela's husband saw this incredible group, he said his wife. "Look at yourself and Rossella, you are terrible. Look at Gabriella (my mother), she is all tidy and cute!"
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Do you write the sub-titles or scripts for voice-overs?
Miz, You are the only one that can stop your pattern of worry & guilt. Strongholds were meant to be broken and overcome. Please stop beating yourself up.
Bobbie, Ha, we had a cat that would fetch too. Obsessive about it! Her favorite was the plastic lid rings from the milk jugs. I'd throw one down the stairs & she would fly after it, bouncing off the walls on her way down & right back up to do it again. We have a photo of her in flight on the stairs when she was a kitten....looks like she has a busted A frame.
Liked the advice on breaking bad habits.lol
Ted, Some attorneys work pro-bono & something simple like a will, POA, etc. would be a breeze for them. Check your yellow pages, local elder organizations, etc. for pro-bono & low cost elder attorneys. Well worth the effort.
Linda, Hope your beloved pa is pain free soon.
Tenn, I'm not very social but would love to see you in action at a party with an arrogant uppity crowd. That would be a hoot. I would love to hear about your surgical expertise around a bunch of snoots. Ha! I try to behave myself these days but used to really enjoy taking the shallow down a few notches.
Mom's new treatment is going very well & she is still behaving after 4 months with only one bad incident. I am sooooo grateful!!!
Back to work for me....editing & yard clean-up.
Have a blessed day all!
I am fighting with the Italian State. I will write back tonight.
love,
miz
Glad Bobbie is Ok was wondering there. Pirate had a lot of work last I heard, and this is a situation one can disappear for days...Just lost in it.
next time FP is at ADH I can shampoo his rug, I think 8 hours is dry time? I wash off his chair wheels too....
Sun coming up on a dry cool day here. And who knows what else eh....?
Ok here so far. Hope everyone else has a good day.
Linda, if you are glad that your cat behaves like a dog, you are not a cat woman! I am a cat woman and I love that they purr and meow all the time! Bobbie you have an amazing cat; really one that happens on a million. Thanks for trying to rise up the mood of your crew! We sure need it. Kuli, I hope our moods don't become synchronized like our periods! That would be a mess! Ok, for me the day begins, you are going to bed, goodnight! Friends of facebook, please write me on the new account (cat with sweater); I can't access anymore to the account with the sheep photo.
J, I agree to stick FP in a cab & take him on to day care! You gotta have some YOU time!
Rip is still around, & feeling a little better. Hopefully she'll be back on the thread soon.
Hope everybody else is feeling a little lighter tonight, especially after our laugh fest with Bobbie! Hope everybody will be able to rest well tonight!
Black hole, black hole, stay away...
and don't think of coming another day!
Gosh, I really need some sleep! Can ya tell??
Goodnight everybody! : )
happy that you have a best friend right there on the boat with ya , ur kitty thinks shes a dog . my kitty louie thinks hes a dog . i love those kind of cats . cant stand the ones that meow and whine and wanna be petted all times . git scram goo get lost ! gets on my nerve , louie likes to wrestle with me . he has no claws so i dont have to worry about getting sliced up .
am going to look up online about tumors and bladder . poor ole pa . he just dont feel good . whines alot lately .
ok brb , xoxo
I am sorry for my absence! I read everything and here we go:
I will not tattoo DNR on my chest.
I do have 'in case of sex flip over' tattooed on my ass.
The cat can fetch. No sh!!. I was amazed. The companionway is like a bowling alley and I hurl her catnip toy down there and she'll bring it back up and drop it at my feet and holler until I do it again.
I had to rub Aspercreme into my shoulder last night.
It got cold at night down here for a few days. One night I woke up and didn't know wtf was going on until I realized that the cat had crawled under the covers and was putting her cold nose on my nekked leg.
the helm is back together and beautiful and Linda you come and find me!!
All of you! I am here when you are finally ready.
Jen. You really have a hellhole there. can you go anywhere and dump 3 clips out of an AK-47? Kill a stump?
Rossella, i am sorry you are missing out on the benefits that are due you. Anyway that it will be retroactive? financial crap is so stressful. Mom hid everything and i am still dealing with it. Of course I am dealing with it my way which sometimes means I'm not dealing with it at all. Way it goes. I refuse to die because of this stuff!!
GP, Flex, Deef, Cast, Austin! Love you guys. everybody think of the boat.
Where's Rip the Stitch? how you feeling gurl?
Miz!! f**k guilt. i don't know of any way to get someone to step away from it but know that it's compulsive thinking and in order to change obsessive/compulsive behavior you have to make a major change, like every time you have a guilty thought stick your thumb in your butt.
Right away this could work out for you because you don't want to stick your thumb in your butt out in public so when you're in public you can't have any guilty thoughts.
Now when you're alone and you have a guilty thought and you have to stick your thumb in your butt (are you right or left handed?) make sure that the thumb you are going to use is the same one you would use to hitchhike so you don't screw up and run out of the house with your thumb in your butt thinking you're going to thumb a ride somewhere and all you can end up doing is giving a 'thumbs up' gesture with your free hand while your other thumb is still firmly planted in your butt. In this pose, hopping up and down on one foot is helpful.
If you wear pantyhose be ready for the 'trampoline' effect if you have a quick guilty thought and try to handle it immediately.
(The above is an example of how no one has any good advice for getting rid of guilt)
As dumb as it sounds it is actually a switch that you turn off.
Tennessee and Tenny Jr! We are here, the cat and I and I'm sorry that i've been AWOL. I am provisioning the boat and have been working 10 hours a day and crashed the rest.
This marina has a car and I am able to get it and bring back stuff for the boat. Big job and it's pooping me out. Nothing compared to what you guys are going through.
Ted! money makes people wierd. Protect yourself accordingly.
Crowe! you're ok buddy. remember to breathe and that it's ok to take a break from working it all out.
Jam! who did I miss? a bunch.
Disclaimer:
Some of this advice may not be professional.
lovbob
I guess he is not going to make comments about worms, with her. He will be good and quiet and he will be afraid of her,,,,
Choose carefully!
So I am really not sure what my "ex" mother (the one with a working head) would do about "this" herself (the one whose head does not work too well).
j , i used to give dad his pills , set it on the table and he put it in his mouth on his own , then i m finding pills here and there on the floor , i quit doing that , from then on i put the pills in his mouth sometimes i put applesauce on his spoon and drop few pills at a time and he would take it , pills not lost somewhere on the floor . i have grandkids and my biggest fear grandkids will eat them like its candy . as for crapper . i go with dad and i do the wipin his hindend with rubber gloves and the mess is down to 99 percent , dad tried to wipe his ass once and he fell off the toilet and got a hellva black eye and busted lip . no more pa !!! u say ur house smells like piss . time to shampoo the rugs and all . hope it works . bobbie tried the vingear and says it smells like douch bags , lol
took pa to have his test done on his bladder , he has tumors growin on his bladder . we decided to leave it alone . got blood drawn and will see if he has cancer in his prostate . if he does , we will leave that alone too . thats what causin him to have blood in his urine . he hasnt bleed any for a while so will wait till its non stop then we can do something about it .
helva day , next weds he will go back to hopsital to remove his cancer skin off his nose . thats gonna be a pain .
i am so tired and i have to take my car to the shop to get it winterize am waiting for my daughter to get home so she can give me a ride back home . i think i ll go find bobbie and hop on her boat ....
cleaning to crapper here every time he uses it, glad I got to it before the ramp guy needed a piss....he has been staring at them all day out the back door, yes here is the reason you are building the ramp...and the reason the house reeks of urine...
I don't know if you have that impression. I have the impression that we (Bobbie's crew) are going through very bad days, most of us, and we are literally setting each other on foot, minute after minute. The one who is stronger at 5.00 in the afternoon helps the others, then at 6.00 in the afternoon he collapses and someone else helps him! Kind of a chain of bowling pins which fall and get up and fall and get up and so on. These are the famous chains of energy that I am so fond about, and I speak so often about.
Where are you "captain, our captain"?