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Hey Everybody! Hope you're all having a great evening & have had an easy day!
Captain Bobbie!!! Glad to hear from that you're OK! We all get concerned when we don't hear from you! How fun that you're traveling about! I'm sorry that Nik isn't there with you or you with him. I agree with Linda...they (his family) don't know what they're missing by not including you in their lives. How is Kitty taking the move? Please come surprise us on FB sometime. You're always welcome...you're our Captain!
Kuli, hate to hear that your Dad has been having a difficult time, but glad that he had a better day today! Been wondering where you were! I'm like you in that I may not post everyday, but always read them everyday.
Miz, thanks for the insight! How are YOU doing??
Rossella, glad to hear that is just a saying for you! How is your Mom doing with the fireplace? Did you come up with a screen to go in front of it? Did you get a mattress for the floor in front of the couch? How are YOU?? Are you getting more rest? I know you stay so tired caring for your Mom & trying to work, too!
Tenn, SO glad that the brothers are getting a taste themselves! Please keep us updated. How are Lil Tenny & you doing without Nola? I know that you miss her. I've really been thinking about you two!
Rip, Linda, Angie, SS, Pirate, Diane, Castoff, Kathy you're in my thoughts, too!
Hope everybody is having an easy night & will get some much needed rest!
I work in a surgery center and the medications we give make people forget when they ask the same questions over and over and over again. I try to remember that I maintain my patience with them when my dad has the same behaviors at home without those drugs. But it sure is harder at times to maintain my patience with him. Sometimes I have to think if I was dreaming about some of the same conversations or if we truly have the same conversation several days in a row (like who's the confused one in this situation). It does help me stay patient with dad though if I make myself remember that this was exactly how he NEVER wanted to be. And when he has his really lucid moments it must be so depressing for him to realize he is what he never wanted to be. I don't know whether to hope he stays at the same mental level he is at now or if he becomes less aware as time goes on. I really thought I knew how this would go but continue to realize I had and have no clue!
Bobbie, so nice to hear from you! I am so sorry you worried for me. "I wanna die" is an expression that we use here not seriously, we use it one thousand times a day. It just means: "I am so tired" or "pissed off". It does not really mean that you wanna die. Sometimes we even say "I wanna die right away". I understand that sometimes the difference in the idioms can cause some misunderstanding. When I went to USA the first time I translated from italian into english the Italian expressions and people laughed a lot because it seems I said absurd things. Sorry again to made you worry. In fact I am tired and I have the same problem Miz has; I am not too patient and when I spend 5 hours running with my mother asking the same question, that is in my case "When are we going home?", after 5 hours I snap (because anyway it hurts that she does not want to stay with me, in spite of everything we (me and the girls) do for her). We all know that it's the disease, but sometimes it is hard to stand a person who always complains. I am lucky because I have to stay with my mother only a few hours a day, and most of the weekend, because the caregivers here cost much less (anyway, they have a salary per hour which is higher than mine as a translator). So I have to work hard to help pay all the expenses of this house - my mother's retirement pension is not enough).. Austin, it seems to me you said (sorry I don't go back to check, otherwise I lose my post) that you talked with the patients about their past and they remembered a lot of things. I would like to do the same, but we would enter into a minefield, because my mother would remember all the relatives she has lost and she would tell me " I want to go to see my parents, my siblings" and so on, even more than she does now. I try to keep her mind far from the past, because I know what happens next. Okay guys let's continue! We have no choice. Jen I am glad you had a nice Halloween. I would like to do "trick or treat" even if I am 53!
Hi to all. Sorry I haven't been posting lately but always read all posts. Bobbie - I was a diva for Halloween - took a nap - what a luxury that was! Dad's been off for about the past week but seems a little better today. Even he says he feels more with it today. Every day is a journey with an unknown destiny. Love and best wishes to all for a peaceful and restful evening!
tenn , i agree with you . looks like to me theyre gonna be kickin his hindend . and to let u get ur land back . i sure think thats whats gonna happen next . :-)
Went to sign more papers today at lawyers.My brothers pitbull tag team,had a disagreement with him about money,so now they have turned on him. I keep hoping some honest judge will say"this have gone on long enough," and sign my land back to me.
bobbie !! so wonderful to hear from you ! glad ure safe and sound at unknown place . lol . bet ya didnt know where it is , maybe its at china ! ah well atleast ur internet is working where u are . am sorry to hear nik is takin care of his mom now , wish she would like you , my land those family just dont know what they r missing ! pa just freaked out today demanding to wear his boots , i said what boots u dont have any , he threw a fit sayin its in my room so i took him in there ahh not there well maybe its in the van well told him i clean van out so many times i ve never seen any there . that pissed him off , i told him i ll get him another pair of boots , am thinkin to get him slipper boots , wouldnt he look cute in that ? took him to bathroom after supper , blood and clot in his brief . :-( hurry up on nov tenth , so we can find out whats causin it . alrighty am out of suagr and need to zoom to the store and get some sugar , if hubby dont have his tea in the mornin he ll be cranky as hell as i would with no sugar inmy coffee , dont wanna piss everybody off in the morning ! take care u all , goodnite xoxoox
Bobbie good to hear from your girlfriend-I do not see anything wrong with an older women with a younger mate I know a couple like that and they have a very good marriage.
sorry I haven't written but I have been a little overwhelmed.
I have been reading and want you all to know that I care about you all deeply.
Rossella! i cried when I read what you said: i wanna die. oh Rossella. it will end. i promise you it will.
GP! glad you guys have each other on FB! truly! what a great way for you guys to relate. very healthy to chat live. Thank you for inviting me. maybe I'm scared that I won't ever leave the computer again and that my ass will weld with the chair as I chat away!
Miz! love you gurl and I am right here.
Deef! Flex! no not in St Augustine any longer. We have moved to an 'undisclosed location'.
Tennessee and lil Tenny! I am so sorry for the loss of Nola. how heartbreaking and awful. I got to see first hand how wonderful you both are with your dog. Bless the both of you and you both make a great team. I finally got the cards!!! They are hilarious! thank you so much!
Linda! I am right here, wishing that you would come and find me! Nik is still in LA because his dad has died and his mom is not well. I have no earthly idea when I'll see him again or if I'll see him again. He has his responsiblilities at home just like I did with my mom, the difference being that my mom always welcomed Nik into our home but his mom does not feel the same way about me. I can't take on crazy drama again right now and he understands and I do miss him but what am I going to do? The boat is here and now and the craziness in the family will continue long after I'm gone. count me out.
BTW Crowe, Nik and I have a huge point spread in our ages. I am the old one and he is the young dude. I didn't know what 'cougar' meant. Nik had to explain it to me. Ahh.. ok. i understand that it is gross to some people and oh well, their issue not mine. one of the little things that I keep in my head is: 'Your opinion of me is none of my business.' That way I don't get confused about what I'm doing and when it doesn't involve anyone else but me and my loved ones who's left to bitch? People who don't know me. If you really want to get sick to your stomach, tour some commercial kitchens.
Crowe, you're doing great and I know that you've got some humor there cause I've seen it! you're safe here buddy.... even with this ol cougar!
Rip the Stitch! I'll find out about that info for ya!
Jen! woohoo the ramp is going to be a reality.
For Halloween I went as a Barnacle and didn't get off the boat. Barnacle Bob.
lovbob
love you guys and I hope you all get through the day without a lot of stress.
I can relate. My mother-in-law has flem in her throat and pulls it out with her hand or just lets it roll out. It is so gross. I want to gag. She knows what she is doing but doesn't care. then she wants to touch my face or hands....yuck......
I found whem my patients would ake guestions over and over again-like what time is it I woukls ask them the same question and usually they would give me the answer I had given them and it cut down a lot on the same question and having a clock in their room helped I had a lot of patience so it never bothered me but hospital nursing has changed so very much anyone who is board try giving them yarn and a crochet hook or knitting needle some never forget how to do that even thought it has been ages or give them something to fold I use to ask them what they did for a living after reading an obit on a former pt. most can tell you stories about the old days other nurses could never understand how I knew so much about them I would say I asked their long term memory stays with them almost forever.
It changes year to year, never had more than 100 never had less than 15. want a costume run down?
Ten Princesses, Two Gal Pirates, One Cow girl, One Robot, One Pumpkin, Four Witches, a few Glee Stars and various Vampires and Living Dead sorts....an a couple teenagers not sure if they could get one more year out of it or not...They do here. I don't discriminate...Hang on to 14 kids, it's all up hill after that for the next fifteen!
Linda, It's just for 5 hours and we have a girl that will stay with her for $10.00 an hour. If I hire someone through the agency it's $19.00 an hour. I can't remember the last time we got away for a whole weekend. We're just going to the games that are not on TV so it won't last long. Too expensive. :) I wish you could get away. It's so not fair to you.
Had a poop one here years ago...My aunt decided she would pull it out and the next day was asked by the doctor..."Do you have a nursing background?"....no...never did that again......
aspenleaf . welcome !! yes i know how u feel when finding crap everywhere . my mother in law is all the time wanting to help me in kitchen , but i ck her fingernails and see something dark under it . i said oh noooo mom u go relax , i ll get it . sends chills up inmy spine wondering what ele s did she touch ? eewwww.
bobbie !! where are you !!!! dont make me come and find you !! :-) sending prayers at your way and sending angels at your way too .
miz , who watches your mom while u go bye bye for the weekend ? wish i could do that but i cant , unless i wanna pay 19 bucks an hr for someone to come . i just stay home and save my 19 bucks an hr . sniffff waaaaaaaa. oh today s tues i gotta get the trash set out by end of the driveway . later xoxoxo
Good Morning Caregivers. Not much new on the home front. I'm getting very annoyed with Mom's repeated questions. I know it's not her fault but it's hard to stay positive. Hubby and I are getting out of town this evening for a college basketball game and then I'm taking tomorrow off from work cause I'll be exhausted. Of course I will be doing my care giving while exhausted. No rest for the wicked. ;)
Oh my dear Kelley, I believe I can top your gross story hands down! My father was so constipated that he decided he needed to remove the blockage himself, so he inserted his own finger into his rectum to break up the hard stool. When he was finished I found pieces of stool on the bathroom floor and to make matters worse, he had not clipped his finger nails so there was poop under them!!
I'm not talking about beauty at all nor merely 10 or so years, but for a 25 year old woman or man to marry someone a spouse who is 60, what? Once they are older they will have a very elderly spouse plus very elderly parents to look after. The risks of a child being born with defects is much higher when the husband is past 40ty. I'm thinking practicality. Wow, how some people just immediately jump to looks and sex. Maybe my past does have something to do with how I see this. Excuse me if I'm not as cheerful as others or as often as some. I don't even have the energy to fake it nor does it make any difference. I'm on an anti-depresent and on a mood stabilizer for my bipolar II (the depressed kind), but little things which would make most people happy hardly phase me at all because I'm so burned out on life; carry a good deal of PTSD; and at 53 am just now really discovering who I am and feeling free to be me. Since being here only two people have ever commented that I'm negative or don't have a sense of humor, while others who know me better can often spot when I'm depressed and comment when I'm a bit humorous, but more often how helpful my insights and comments particularly about F.O.G. has meant in their life. I get a real laugh out of comments like Ed who teases me some about how I let it all hang out in my longer posts. :) And I really like his comment about not taking his identity or feeling of self-esteem for those around him in the bronx who an't got none. :)
My hubby is 11 years younger than I am. It used to bother me that people stared at us but I don't care anymore. I honestly was looking for someone older than me but sometimes life does not go as we plan.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Captain Bobbie!!! Glad to hear from that you're OK! We all get concerned when we don't hear from you! How fun that you're traveling about! I'm sorry that Nik isn't there with you or you with him. I agree with Linda...they (his family) don't know what they're missing by not including you in their lives. How is Kitty taking the move? Please come surprise us on FB sometime. You're always welcome...you're our Captain!
Kuli, hate to hear that your Dad has been having a difficult time, but glad that he had a better day today! Been wondering where you were! I'm like you in that I may not post everyday, but always read them everyday.
Miz, thanks for the insight! How are YOU doing??
Rossella, glad to hear that is just a saying for you! How is your Mom doing with the fireplace? Did you come up with a screen to go in front of it? Did you get a mattress for the floor in front of the couch? How are YOU?? Are you getting more rest? I know you stay so tired caring for your Mom & trying to work, too!
Tenn, SO glad that the brothers are getting a taste themselves! Please keep us updated. How are Lil Tenny & you doing without Nola? I know that you miss her. I've really been thinking about you two!
Rip, Linda, Angie, SS, Pirate, Diane, Castoff, Kathy you're in my thoughts, too!
Hope everybody is having an easy night & will get some much needed rest!
Okay guys let's continue! We have no choice.
Jen I am glad you had a nice Halloween. I would like to do "trick or treat" even if I am 53!
pa just freaked out today demanding to wear his boots , i said what boots u dont have any , he threw a fit sayin its in my room so i took him in there ahh not there well maybe its in the van well told him i clean van out so many times i ve never seen any there . that pissed him off , i told him i ll get him another pair of boots , am thinkin to get him slipper boots , wouldnt he look cute in that ?
took him to bathroom after supper , blood and clot in his brief .
:-( hurry up on nov tenth , so we can find out whats causin it .
alrighty am out of suagr and need to zoom to the store and get some sugar , if hubby dont have his tea in the mornin he ll be cranky as hell as i would with no sugar inmy coffee , dont wanna piss everybody off in the morning !
take care u all , goodnite xoxoox
sorry I haven't written but I have been a little overwhelmed.
I have been reading and want you all to know that I care about you all deeply.
Rossella! i cried when I read what you said: i wanna die. oh Rossella. it will end. i promise you it will.
GP! glad you guys have each other on FB! truly! what a great way for you guys to relate. very healthy to chat live. Thank you for inviting me. maybe I'm scared that I won't ever leave the computer again and that my ass will weld with the chair as I chat away!
Miz! love you gurl and I am right here.
Deef! Flex! no not in St Augustine any longer. We have moved to an 'undisclosed location'.
Tennessee and lil Tenny! I am so sorry for the loss of Nola. how heartbreaking and awful. I got to see first hand how wonderful you both are with your dog. Bless the both of you and you both make a great team.
I finally got the cards!!! They are hilarious! thank you so much!
Linda! I am right here, wishing that you would come and find me! Nik is still in LA because his dad has died and his mom is not well. I have no earthly idea when I'll see him again or if I'll see him again. He has his responsiblilities at home just like I did with my mom, the difference being that my mom always welcomed Nik into our home but his mom does not feel the same way about me. I can't take on crazy drama again right now and he understands and I do miss him but what am I going to do? The boat is here and now and the craziness in the family will continue long after I'm gone. count me out.
BTW Crowe, Nik and I have a huge point spread in our ages. I am the old one and he is the young dude. I didn't know what 'cougar' meant. Nik had to explain it to me. Ahh.. ok.
i understand that it is gross to some people and oh well, their issue not mine.
one of the little things that I keep in my head is:
'Your opinion of me is none of my business.'
That way I don't get confused about what I'm doing and when it doesn't involve anyone else but me and my loved ones who's left to bitch? People who don't know me.
If you really want to get sick to your stomach, tour some commercial kitchens.
Crowe, you're doing great and I know that you've got some humor there cause I've seen it! you're safe here buddy.... even with this ol cougar!
Rip the Stitch! I'll find out about that info for ya!
Jen! woohoo the ramp is going to be a reality.
For Halloween I went as a Barnacle and didn't get off the boat.
Barnacle Bob.
lovbob
love you guys and I hope you all get through the day without a lot of stress.
Ten Princesses, Two Gal Pirates, One Cow girl, One Robot, One Pumpkin, Four Witches, a few Glee Stars and various Vampires and Living Dead sorts....an a couple teenagers not sure if they could get one more year out of it or not...They do here. I don't discriminate...Hang on to 14 kids, it's all up hill after that for the next fifteen!
love,
miz
Halloween was ok must have had over fifty kids this year...
yes i know how u feel when finding crap everywhere .
my mother in law is all the time wanting to help me in kitchen , but i ck her fingernails and see something dark under it . i said oh noooo mom u go relax , i ll get it .
sends chills up inmy spine wondering what ele s did she touch ? eewwww.
bobbie !! where are you !!!! dont make me come and find you !! :-) sending prayers at your way and sending angels at your way too .
miz , who watches your mom while u go bye bye for the weekend ? wish i could do that but i cant , unless i wanna pay 19 bucks an hr for someone to come . i just stay home and save my 19 bucks an hr . sniffff waaaaaaaa.
oh today s tues i gotta get the trash set out by end of the driveway . later xoxoxo
love,
miz
I'm not talking about beauty at all nor merely 10 or so years, but for a 25 year old woman or man to marry someone a spouse who is 60, what? Once they are older they will have a very elderly spouse plus very elderly parents to look after. The risks of a child being born with defects is much higher when the husband is past 40ty. I'm thinking practicality. Wow, how some people just immediately jump to looks and sex. Maybe my past does have something to do with how I see this. Excuse me if I'm not as cheerful as others or as often as some. I don't even have the energy to fake it nor does it make any difference. I'm on an anti-depresent and on a mood stabilizer for my bipolar II (the depressed kind), but little things which would make most people happy hardly phase me at all because I'm so burned out on life; carry a good deal of PTSD; and at 53 am just now really discovering who I am and feeling free to be me. Since being here only two people have ever commented that I'm negative or don't have a sense of humor, while others who know me better can often spot when I'm depressed and comment when I'm a bit humorous, but more often how helpful my insights and comments particularly about F.O.G. has meant in their life. I get a real laugh out of comments like Ed who teases me some about how I let it all hang out in my longer posts. :) And I really like his comment about not taking his identity or feeling of self-esteem for those around him in the bronx who an't got none. :)