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Georgia, I agree very much about what you say. Only, when one of the two people is 75 and rich, and the other one is 17 and poor, some doubts arise. That was a joke.
Crowe, beauty is in the eye of the beholder! I'm speaking from experience when I say that it's not gross & life is what you make out of it! My husband is almost 15 years older than me, he's a very good man & he is the love of my life! AND we've been married for over 20 years!!!
If two adults find each other in this HUGE world that we live in, fall in love, get married & make each other happy then that's a good thing!!! If someone else doesn't like it, then look the other way!!! If them/us being together isn't illegal or immoral, it's no one else's business how much older one is than the other!!!
I'm concerned about you, being so negative all of the time! I hope that you'll find some happiness & be able to enjoy life!!!
I don't know if this grosses anyone else out, but the very idea of a person marrying someone old enough to be their parents sounds gross without even having to think about it.
dd I learned from watching Dr. Phil and reading one of his books that I did not deserve to be treated bably -it took a long time for me to realize this and that I was giving him power that he did not deserve-so when he was disrespectful I would leave the room and if he was in rehab I would go home and when he left me a nasty message on the phone I would not go to see him until I was ready to do so-keep telling yourself you do not deserve that treatment until you believe it yourself. He blamed me for any of his problems I had to stop my husband from driving also-it was not safe and since he could not get in the car by himself he could not drive. His behaivor at church to me was bad so I would not take him I asked someone else to take him twice a month and I would go the other two weeks but that never worked. I was his only friend and he was so mean to me-I also did activities on my own or went out to lunch with my girlfriends and did not take him with me when visiting my family because he always started fights.
Diane, I understand you very well - that you are tired and you would like to cut your working hours - but I agree with your siblings that it can give you problems in the future, from the point of view of work. Our employers don't give a damn if we are tired because we have old relatives, or little children to take care of... Jen I hope your Halloween was good despite the sabotage. Sometimes our relatives can be real joy-killers. Maybe she was in a bad mood and she wanted you to be in a bad mood, too. MMC, my mother does many strange things too. And she has a lot of fantasy in doing them. But sometimes she becomes very lucid, for example when she feels neglected she starts to say: "I am a poor old woman and nobody takes care about me and about what I need". Tonight I told her that her sister suffers from a back-ache and she said "I suffer more than her". This is my old mother, my mother before the disease (alzheimer). She always wanted to be at the centre of everything. When her old self resurfaces I understand that sometimes they "can" connect their neurons, if they really want to! What a patience we need!
austin ure funny . cat layin on threadmill . haha that made me giggle . wow nobody gets on anymore here ugh ? i know i havent been on it much . i just read and get off the compture , pa s feeling good this morning . wanted a shower ! i about fell over when he said that , my sister in law lost her brother last friday , bleeding in thebrain and took him off life support . so its a sad time for them . amplanning to go and visit her this evening , they had funeral this morn at 10 ,couldnt go this morning , didnt have a sitter for pa . thought id go this evening instead .that way my daughter be here to watch pa . bobbie !!! where are you ? hope ure doing ok . is ur hubby there with ya yet ? hope all is well with you and ur kitty kitty . hope to hear from u real soon . xoxox
195Austin- I'm caring for my husband and I'd like to know how you handled the bad tempers. He is so angry because he can not drive anymore - he blames me. He gets so confused and then there are times when he's clear as a bell
Afew years ago when my husband was alive he gave my cat treats to win his over one day I told my cat he was getting fat so later I found him laying on the treadmilllI told him it only works if it is turned on.
I am getting very discouraged I joined a famous date online thought there would be a least one other lonely person out there for me. We do not get trick or treaters anymore our road is not safe to walk on; Most of our leaves are down but it was a pretty fall and many warm days-had the wood stove going last night it felt good my cat loved it-take care all you angels-have made a lot of things for our craft fair to make money for supplies for the classes and making more lap robes to donate and reading a lot-need to get cleaning today.
Good Morning, My Fellow Wonderful Caregivers. Not much to report here except I figured out I was checking Mom's blood sugar level incorrectly with the new test strips. Seems your not supposed to use both sides of the test strip to gather the blood. I found this out while testing the meter. Oops. It's really a relief but I feel bad creating all the drama. Live and learn I guess. Off to work later today. We went to the Illinois basketball game Friday night and I was tired all weekend and didn't get jack done. I sooooo need a vacation. Don't see one coming in the near or far future. Right now my "vacation" is going to work sometimes. Sometimes because some days are very stressful and a little upsetting there and some are not too bad.
Welcome to the thread, mmc333. Yes, those trips can be tiring and trying. Our loved ones do odd things sometimes and it's usually best to just laugh. :)
Hello from newbie! This is not a "gross out" just a little something that happened that struck me funny. Mom never goes anywhere without kleenex box. We took her to doctor last week - a story in itself. On the way over I was holding her hand and talking to try to calm her, then noticed she was trying to stuff my hand into the Kleenex box on her lap. Guess I must look like a big Kleenex! Oh well... We made it there and back, the 4 of us survived (me, Mom, hubby and sitter) and hopefully won't need to make that trip again for a while.
Ditto from Rip, Jen! I'd love to see a photo of you tonight. I'm sad you're not appreciated ...
For what it's worth I took the little dogs to the dog park b/c Dad insisted. They had so much attention! Rockette in her Leopard jacket & Foxy Pom in her Tiger coat. & silly me forgot the camera. There was the largest black Mastiff ever sniffing at the little TigerFox. She grrrred & the BIG guy jumped backwards 5 ft! Everyone howled which started her strutting around with her little attitude. Foxy is very fierce! I think her previous owners may have had livestock since she loves large animals. Is very adept at winding thru their hooves. (hoofs? Rossella ... however do you translate this mysterious language? Words with triple meanings & then the plural rules, etc. I used to be better at it )
Sorry you're having a rough evening too. It ticks me off that people feel they have a right to walk over you. You have a good time being a wicth doctor and tell the rest "bite me".
I have on a truly hideous polyester gown from the seventies here, fluff on the sleeves...I added a witches hat a stethoscope an name tag and am yes...a Witch Doctor. I carved my pumpkin with a face that can only be described as malevolent...and it suits. I was all excited getting dressed up and putting candy in a bowl for the kids for later...my mom comes in and says no less than five snotty rude things at me from the moment I, well got in the shower to coming on line just now..." wheres the meat for the meat loaf?" Yes I accidentally put it in the freezer from fridge as it was waiting to be separated and froze since Saturday Afternoon. "are you scaring the pets?" yes " these are still damp" huff..her bras after I haul them and all her laundry upstairs for her..."That blue blanket was wet in some places, not even damp but WET!" "is the CAT outside!?" no.... God this woman is trying to kill me. Good thing my costume includes a mask....I am not sure I can even smile now...
Looks like it's been a quiet day on the thread. I hope everyone is well.
Mom is happy sitting on the porch waiting for the trick-or-treaters. She even ate her dinner out there saying "she didn't want to miss anything".
I am feeling rather frustrated with my siblings. I am struggling to work a 40 hour work week and care for mom. I asked my sister and brother what they though if I were to cut down my hours. My brother says don't cut hours because future employers will look down upon it. My sister just says "can you afford it". It would be nice if they could recognize all that I do for mom and help with more. I guess that is just wishful thinking. I know I can't be the only one out there killing themselves trying to care for a parent and work. I'm soon not going to have a choice because my boss is about ready to can me anyway.
Bobbie, I haven't heard from you for awhile. Where are you now that you had to move? Are you still in St. Augustine?
Really? I have to take information. But, as in Italy everything is connected, I am afraid that the government at a due moment takes the money away from her retirement pension (it already happened)
Rosella it was her bill not yours tell them you are not responsible and do not give in our elders do not pay their bills it should not be up to use to make it right -tell them to take her to court-their lawyers will not want her to be on the stand and they will probably let it go-we do not need to be responsible for our parent's bills -now a spouse they come after -my husband left me with debts whixh will take me another six years to pay off -it is either that or bankrupsey-then I will never be able to get credit-I am so angery -he had mental illness where he had to buy things to make him fell better for a short time-now I am stuck-I wish I had known this I would have had my own credit cards and he his and I would not be in this mess-I tell my friends to get their own and not to let the husbands get a second card in their name-and we hired a elder lawyer who never told us this fact-he should have-he said he was very experienced and we paid him big money to advise us and he let us down.
My mom is glad all of this is over and that I took care of it without complaining. Yeah, I didn't complain around her for it would have done no good.
My step-dad is so declined that all he is aware of is another year of taxes is now signed. He used to comment about keeping him from being taken to jail by an IRS agent on each side, but now it's how much do we owe and where do I sign?
I've had so many things diverting my attention and energy lately, I completely forgot that I'd been planning for the CPA, his associate and I to go out and celebrate. I'd even lost the bottle that I had stored in the refrigerator for this celebration as well. Oh well, maybe I'll remember to have a big celebration when we get 2009 sent in soon, I hope!
Thank ya'll for your support and affirmation while I've been dealing with this.
Crowe I am so glad you are making progress hope your Mom and siblings appreciate all you are doing to get it straighted out-probably not but you should be proud of yourself for doing it and saving them problems down the road maybe someday they will realize what you have done for them but you know your friends here are so proud of you for caring and getting it done and I would personally let them know that you did all the work to make it possible-you deserve all the credit-you are a good man.
Good morning everyone. A very good morning it is with completing a mess of my mom and step-dad's tax returns that were not filed until I discovered that fact in early 2009. From then until yesterday, 2004-2008 have been completed by a new CPA after I fired the so called 'friend of the family' who was semi-retired. We had an extension for 2009 and so are only about a month behind. Getting my step-siblings help with this has been both good and agonizing at times.
I feel so bad for my dad today. He has had the same caregiver coming on Friday afternoon for 4 months and I got a message today that she will no longer be able to come, starting today. My dad had grown very fond of her so it's like he's lost yet another friend. I'm so disappointed in her. It's bad enough my family does this to him but now strangers that he has befriended? How is all of this fair?!? And he's had a bad week besides - lots of pain, not feeling well. Sometimes I feel so bad for him, I just want to cry.
It's so true!!! I just ran upstairs to check on SIr ... told him I am online talikng to my famiy in Georgia, South Carolina & Michigan .. now Italy! He is impressed ... & happy for us! my DNA family might visit tomorrow ...
He is quiet and does what he is told with strangers. Like grandma, it is only family who get/got to see the stubborn less than good parts of them. i am forever hearing how kind and good they both were. and from that perspective, they were....
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
That was a joke.
If two adults find each other in this HUGE world that we live in, fall in love, get married & make each other happy then that's a good thing!!! If someone else doesn't like it, then look the other way!!! If them/us being together isn't illegal or immoral, it's no one else's business how much older one is than the other!!!
I'm concerned about you, being so negative all of the time! I hope that you'll find some happiness & be able to enjoy life!!!
Just wanted to check in & let you know that I'm thinking about you! Hoping that everything is going smoothly & no poop soup!
I agree...Where's our Captain Bobbie??
Gotta go for now...Time to finish supper & time to check on George the Front Porch Possum!
Love & hugs to each of you! : )
Jen I hope your Halloween was good despite the sabotage. Sometimes our relatives can be real joy-killers. Maybe she was in a bad mood and she wanted you to be in a bad mood, too.
MMC, my mother does many strange things too. And she has a lot of fantasy in doing them. But sometimes she becomes very lucid, for example when she feels neglected she starts to say: "I am a poor old woman and nobody takes care about me and about what I need". Tonight I told her that her sister suffers from a back-ache and she said "I suffer more than her". This is my old mother, my mother before the disease (alzheimer). She always wanted to be at the centre of everything. When her old self resurfaces I understand that sometimes they "can" connect their neurons, if they really want to!
What a patience we need!
wow nobody gets on anymore here ugh ? i know i havent been on it much . i just read and get off the compture ,
pa s feeling good this morning . wanted a shower ! i about fell over when he said that ,
my sister in law lost her brother last friday , bleeding in thebrain and took him off life support . so its a sad time for them . amplanning to go and visit her this evening , they had funeral this morn at 10 ,couldnt go this morning , didnt have a sitter for pa . thought id go this evening instead .that way my daughter be here to watch pa .
bobbie !!! where are you ? hope ure doing ok . is ur hubby there with ya yet ? hope all is well with you and ur kitty kitty .
hope to hear from u real soon . xoxox
bobbie, please check in. You know how I worry. :)
love,
miz
love,
miz
This is not a "gross out" just a little something that happened that struck me funny. Mom never goes anywhere without kleenex box. We took her to doctor last week - a story in itself. On the way over I was holding her hand and talking to try to calm her, then noticed she was trying to stuff my hand into the Kleenex box on her lap. Guess I must look like a big Kleenex! Oh well...
We made it there and back, the 4 of us survived (me, Mom, hubby and sitter) and hopefully won't need to make that trip again for a while.
For what it's worth I took the little dogs to the dog park b/c Dad insisted. They had so much attention! Rockette in her Leopard jacket & Foxy Pom in her Tiger coat. & silly me forgot the camera.
There was the largest black Mastiff ever sniffing at the little TigerFox. She grrrred & the BIG guy jumped backwards 5 ft! Everyone howled which started her strutting around with her little attitude. Foxy is very fierce! I think her previous owners may have had livestock since she loves large animals. Is very adept at winding thru their hooves. (hoofs? Rossella ... however do you translate this mysterious language? Words with triple meanings & then the plural rules, etc. I used to be better at it )
Happy Halloween all!
I'll post their jacket photos on FB soon.
God this woman is trying to kill me. Good thing my costume includes a mask....I am not sure I can even smile now...
Looks like it's been a quiet day on the thread. I hope everyone is well.
Mom is happy sitting on the porch waiting for the trick-or-treaters. She even ate her dinner out there saying "she didn't want to miss anything".
I am feeling rather frustrated with my siblings. I am struggling to work a 40 hour work week and care for mom. I asked my sister and brother what they though if I were to cut down my hours. My brother says don't cut hours because future employers will look down upon it. My sister just says "can you afford it". It would be nice if they could recognize all that I do for mom and help with more. I guess that is just wishful thinking. I know I can't be the only one out there killing themselves trying to care for a parent and work. I'm soon not going to have a choice because my boss is about ready to can me anyway.
Bobbie, I haven't heard from you for awhile. Where are you now that you had to move? Are you still in St. Augustine?
Take care my dear friends and Happy Halloween.
Diane
I wanna die
My step-dad is so declined that all he is aware of is another year of taxes is now signed. He used to comment about keeping him from being taken to jail by an IRS agent on each side, but now it's how much do we owe and where do I sign?
I've had so many things diverting my attention and energy lately, I completely forgot that I'd been planning for the CPA, his associate and I to go out and celebrate. I'd even lost the bottle that I had stored in the refrigerator for this celebration as well. Oh well, maybe I'll remember to have a big celebration when we get 2009 sent in soon, I hope!
Thank ya'll for your support and affirmation while I've been dealing with this.
Semper Fi Pamela!!!!!!!! Hooooraaaa!!!!
I just ran upstairs to check on SIr ... told him I am online talikng to my famiy in Georgia, South Carolina & Michigan .. now Italy!
He is impressed ... & happy for us!
my DNA family might visit tomorrow ...