Grossed out and need to vent—I just caught Mom using my toothbrush to comb her hair!

Glad you are back J! You have so much going on dealing with that grouchy old guy ...
Do you have time for you?

I can't imagine caring for a nasty man, yet you never let him down. He is lucky to have you.
So is your mom.

And then the ER doctor said that he was "Dilantin Toxic". My grandfather had the exact same problem last year, they cut the anti-seizure medication and then doubled it...any wonder we were back in the ER. He is stable now and scheduled for an Ultrasound of his liver for Friday. So what happens then I don't know. But He won't being doing Adult Day health till then.

A friend of my father's, when they were very young students, if they had to make a long trip on a train and the train was overcrowded, that friend took his shoes off and he put his stinky feet on the opposite chair. After a while, all the other people in the carriage got up and went away, so that friend of my father's and all his friends had a lot of space. My father told me this story very often. It was very funny for him! It was disgusting for me.

LOL Maxine.

Hi guys Maxine here GP good for you sometimes the ER is the only answer do file a report use the word unacceptable a lot that gets attention hopefully the note will be seen on their next inspection you can also call the board of health in your state they will send letter back that will not be of any help to you except it will be part of their next inspection and they will be more responsible in that area for the next 3 years until the next inspection with JCAH or joint commisions. Miz forget the shower people will get out of your way so the shopping will go faster and at the check out counter they will be quicker, Rip me wise? if I am it is from experience have a good weekend everyone.

Hi Everyone. I went ahead and showered and went to Target. Spent too much of course. Probably cause I'm so tired. Hubby is at the grocery store right now, bless his heart. :)) I do feel a bit better. Just so tired. Rip, I'm on the pill. I wonder if that is messing me up? I'll write more later. I love yas!! Thank you all so much!!

miz

Peach!
I think you should write to someone about your lack of treatment. Not sure who to address it too.

I was impressed when the hosiptal lab nurse called Wed. after Dad's culture had grown. Prescribed a different antibiotic that might knock it out. Not sure if it was a urine or blood culture? They took everything they could get out of the poor guy that night! Especially his dignity!

Frankly, I'm not sure the meds helped as much as having his catherter replaced. He's had sunshine piss since then!
The doc says there is always some infection with a cath.

Dang ... I was really hoping you had a good night's sleep & felt better today. Bummer ... yes, do something about the clinic. Even if you need to do it anonymous at a later time. Think of the other people receiving lousy treatment.
For the good of all!

My horoscope said I'd have a goodday & should do house work.
YUCK!!!
I cleaned the refrigerator this morning. Whoooppppeeee!

I was seeing a guy who wnats to be a chef. Retired young, has money to do it. Took cooking classes, bought ultra expensive knives & cookware.

I told him my ideal house wouldn't even have a kitchen. I really meant it!
He refused to believe me!
I did enough scratch cooking while I was married. I have other worthy talents.
So this morning I dumped out all kinds of weird his stuff from my fridge. Should send it to a lab.

He will find a lady who loves him!

It's warm sunny day in the Northwest! Dad is feeling fine so out I go into the jungle of my yard.

Kaye ... I hope those drugs kick in! I am frustrated for you! Keep on writing? It's a good feeling to vent here, I think you feel lthat too.
Miz ... i hope the shopping is OVER! Done with & successful! Once upon a time I LOVED shopping! Had money then too. Even a personal shopper at Nordstroms if you an believe that. Needed a business wardrobe & Diane was my size. We looked very sharp!

Rossella ... please feel better soon? Big hugs to Roxy, Camelia & all.

Everyone else ~ Kuli girl ~ good luck with the folks.
Hoping Kathy is able to relax with her time off.
Cast off! 8 hummingbirds this morning!
Captain Bobbie! On land or sea? Remember, you can check colors charts at any sign shop. Like Fast Signs or Sign O Ramma. (yes ... there is a franchise called that. Sounds like a circus to me ~ but I'm from the old school)

SecretSister??? I hope your watching ... & things are going well in your world. Miss you ...

Austin ... you are so very wise!

I tlhink we have some of the best brains in the world here!
Later ...
the Rip

Menopause ... Why isn't it called Women o pause? Does it mean Men should Pause & think before they speak?
That should begin with teenage boys during puberty. Stop, think, speak. The things that would come out of my stepson's mouth when he started to 'develop' ...
oh Lord!

I love the saying:
"Better to remain silent & thought of as an idiot, rather than speaking & confirming the fact".

I think I've been thru it ... stopped bleeding a couple years ago ... didn't notice anything. A girlfriend had the same experience. We both were active & athelic. We noticed things had stopped, but no madness, hot flashes or other symtoms.

I have night sweats often, but I think it's from stress. I grind my teeth 24 hours a day. Always have. People think I am so "laid back" ~ HA!
Everyone except the dentists!

As a teenager my periods were frequent & heavy. Family doc put me on high strength birth control pills. Was supposed to help with my acne as well.

I felt crazy! Tense, anxious, gained weight ... had no idea why. Mom noticed the changes but didn't associate it with meds. She had lived on them for years after having me. Probably wanted to ensure there wasn't another me born?
Thought it was teenage behavior.

For about 4 years I lived in an agitated life, faithfully taking the easy regular, period ~ no zit pills. Certainly wasn't for sex purposes. Couldn't find a man worth bothering with. Picky me.

I was good at hiding the anxiety, but silently lived it.

I finally wised up. Did some research, which wasn't easy in those days, I stopped the pills. Within 2 months my weight wasn't a battle, I was content & happy! Hmmmm ... I wasn't quite sure if it was the pills, a fascinating job or exiting puberty.

Then I met a guy ... we became close ... & closer. Thought I might give the pills another shot. Medicine had come a long way & the new doc gave a very low dose.
Give it a try, kid.

WIthin a week I tensed right back into creepyville! By the end of the first cycle I decided I wasn't a candidate for any kinds of hormones other than those I was born with. Tossed the pills.
It was the right thing for me.

So now y'all know more about me than most of my friends. I think vasectomies are the best medicine ever!

Once again, another slice of Rip Life ~
as Dad watched the cowbpy shows with the volume loud.

Yeh, Rip, I loved hearing about the dogs going the the NH, too! So many of the folks there once had pets, but are no longer able to, but still love them so it was so sweet to be able to make them happy with your furry friends! Did any of you see the spot on Good Morning America about the Shetland Pony that gets to go to the NH & gives the people kisses? Sweet!

miz, thank you for your good thoughts on me getting help! At the doc's office they'll tell you right away if you have a UTI, but said that they had to send it off to do the culture to see which antibiotic that would work best. Been on the antibiotic for 24 hours, now, but still feel like, well, you know...Maybe will feel better soon! I'm SO far behind on EVERYTHING, but right now don't even care!

miz, I'm glad that you got some sleep, but sorry that you feel like crap today! Not good! I'm SO sorry that you're feeling trapped!!! Since hubby has extra energy could he go to do the errands for you? But you know what, it might do you good to get out for a little while, too. While you're out can you take the time to do something just for you?? I totally understand not wanting to do the shower thing, myself...I have to push myself!!! And I understand, too, about wanting to just stay in bed & not think about anything. If I'm asleep life isn't so painful. Wish I could sleep! I'm interested to see about the crankiness during menopause, too! I don't feel like I'm any good to anybody anymore, but I gotta be. It's a never ending, vicious cycle!!!!! I'm sorry, I didn't mean to get off on me, miz! I really do want to encourage you!!! I hope that you'll get your meds straightened out soon & will feel like a million bucks! How can we make it better for you??

Bobbie, I liked your depends joke, too! Hope you & Nik are OK!

Love & hugs to everybody!

Miz, I think that if your body tells you to rest, you have to try to rest. If you listen to your body and you take it easy for a few days, you will certainly be better. Last year I had a period where I felt like putting garlic everywhere. I ate lots of garlic (I did not have a fiancé, so there was not a problem). And then I discovered that my blood pressure had rocketed, (and as you know garlic lowers pressure). So it was a signal that my body had given me.
Ok?
When I was going through menopause I just felt very nervous, but I have managed not to kill anybody, so, all is well which ends well.
Good evening to everybody

Hello Everyone. My doc lowered my anti-depressant in the hopes that I won't feel hungover the next day if I don't get enough sleep. Well, I lowered it last night and I slept almost 10 hours and I feel like crap today. I'm so cranky. Gotta go to Target and the grocery store and I don't wanna. For those of you who have gone through menopause, were you cranky all the time? It might just be that I need the full amount of medicine, I don't know. I need a break so bad. Sorry, I've whined about this so much in the past. I feel so trapped. Hubby finally has some energy and I don't. I just want to go to bed and not think about anything. I got LOTS of groceries to get. I hate it all including the taking a shower and all that that entails. LOL. Oh woe is me, I guess.

GP, I am so glad you got help!! I don't understand your doctor's office. At me and Mom's office you can wait for the results as soon as you give it to them. Maybe yours was something that had to be sent out. I don't know. I hope you feel better and soon!!

Rip, your writing about your dogs and the nursing home about made me cry. So very sweet!!

And Rip, don't you worry about ticking someone off with what you said. You have every right.

Bobbie, I LOVED your Depends joke. :))

WooHoo, Kuli that you got to bring your Dad home! I know that was a relief for both of you. Nothing like resting in your own bed. Thanks for the hug! I still didn't sleep well last night. Had to get up 8 times, I think. I'm still extremely tired this morning. Hopefully the antibotic will kick in soon & I'll be snoring all night through!

Rip, I agree with you about the records stuff. Hey, I need you guys advice...Should I make a report to the office manager at the Health Dept. for them dropping the ball with me about the urine culture or just let well enough alone. I don't want to make them mad & take it out on me later, but I sure would hate for someone else to have to go through this.

OH, something else...I forgot to ask for a script for a potential yeast infection...any suggestions? And I'm supposed to meet with the doc, on Tuesday, that is giving me a hard time about the Wellbutrin possably causing the UTI...Not looking forward to that...

Hope everyone will have a great Saturday!

Yeow .. another day in the life of eldercare!

Dad is dozing in his bed too. What a relief! I don't have enough energy to eat. Too late now.

Kuli - I wish I had your knowledge. Everytime I think I am top of of his meds, I find a different print-out from years ago.
Why is it so difficult to forward med info within the new system
to trusted docs?
We can share stuff online in an instant online here.

I'm sure al the data will someday be updated ....it must be hard for the doctors & staff who don't receive the the info.

RIP - Even tho I'm a nurse, I still trust that the docs will do the right thing. However, they almost killed my dad earlier this year by giving him medication for gout (that he doesn't really have) that causes problems with his medication for rheumatoid arthritis (which he really does have). His blood count was so low by the time we realized this, poor guy could barely get out of a chair by himself. Imagine this in this day and age where computers are supposed to alert docs about these kind of things. Luckily once we stopped the one med and lowered the dose on the other, things eventually straightened out. Now everytime they order a new drug, I check online to make sure it goes with everything else he takes. And I have lists of all of his meds with the times he takes them as well as a list of procedures, hospitalizations, medical issues, etc that I bring each time he goes to the ER. I can't remember everything anymore and the docs are always very impressed when I hand them the lists. GP - Thank the Lord, you may finally get some relief!!!!!! Everyone else - Hope we all have a good weekend, without ER visits and all the other catastrophes that can happen. Oh, and by the way, my dad was discharged late this afternoon. Breathing is much, much better. He was sooooo ornery and angry with his bed alarm and with me for letting them put it on. The docs left it up to me if I was "comfortable" with him coming home. He looked better and I told them since he has the energy to be angry and ornery, I thought it best he come home. So he's tucked into the comfort of his own bed, sleeping soundly as we speak. Another day in the life...... Good night all, Sweet dreams!

Just lost a post. I shouldn't look back, huh?

Reading Peaches comment inspired another medical meltdown with Dad.
Hospital, on of many years ago ... staff put him on Flomax to help him void (piss alot).
Apparently they didn't realize he was on Detrol LA .. to STOP the frequent pissing!

They supposably had records of his meds ...
Seemed strange to me. I'm am not a doctor or nurse ... just someone who looks out for her Dad. Does some research & wondered ...

Made an appt with his urologist. Our calm doctor almost went thru the roof! Had two conflicting piss meds! Records weren't forwarded! We were lucky to save the ceiling!

From what I understand now, his prostrate cancer is growing to the point his urine can not pass thru his ureatha - so he has a cathater now rather than med$. We can live with it.

Why the records weren't forwarded & documented is a mystery.

Another eye opening story:
My ex husband had bad sh*ts. BAD - He was the kind of guy who had his teeth drilled without novacaine. Tough. TOUGH man.

He was puking & souping. Not his style ...

I dragged him into Urgent Care. Bitchy, snooty doc, lousy patient.
& me.
We ended up with him at home & me taking cellophane sh*t samples to the hosptial lab after midnight. (You'll love this ... cover your toilet seat with cellophane & snag the sh*t) FUN!
Humiliating for both of us ... but I cared.

Another urgent Care doc called the next day after looking ver the chart & said i should run him to ER & have him admitted. If it where her husband - she would.
No way with my guy ....
In fact, I had called the Urgent Care earlier to ask about the results - the receptionist answered the phone ... a nasty tone of voice:
"WHAT?" - I asked if I had reached the Urgent Care center.
She said "yeah....".
I asked if she realised she answered the public line saying "WHAT???". Realy rude.
She didn't apologise .. said she thought it was a back line. What did I want?
I told her I was suppose to call for lab results.
She said she didn't know "nothing". I hope she was fired.

Anyway, the spouse moved into the guest & bathroom to suffered alone for 3 days. His style.
He recovered.
6 month's later I have a call from the public health dept. saying he had ECOLI, shigalia & a host of other bacteria!
They must see him!

i suggested that I'd like to see him too but he was on a building project far away. No way would he find time for an examination.

Makes me wonder why I ran his sh*tty cellophane to the lab late at night, only to have the results appear months later.

I know I've been ranting lots today, but it is in frustration for everyone here.
I truly respect most of the medical people we've been involved with over the years - some great professionals!

Yet, with everything changing, going tech ...It's scary!
I don't want to give advice ... yet I am going to say this:
Keep track of everything!
(I am bad at that, I used to have a keen mind that remembered everything ... now I have trouble spelling ...)
Question the doctors! you are paying for their services.
How can they recall anything when they have 15 minute appts. 8 hrs a day?
A new person, an old person, a different trauma, a repeat trauma, another chronic complainer ... I feel for them!

The young ER doc (from Sun/ morning) said:
"First do no Harm".
He mentioned about talking with his 96 YO grandmother's doc, recommending she NOT be admitted to the hospital!
Bravo!!!
He said there are more germs there than many fragile people could combat.

Please remind me to write a commendation to the hospital about him.

Dad needs dinner.

Thaks & please think for your doctors.

Mom was having so many UTIs that I finally had her doctor put her on a daily low dose antibiotic for maintenance. Now she goes longer between the infections. It is 50mgs of macrodantin every night.It definitely made a difference.
GP, So happy you are finally on the right track to feeling better! It's mind boggling how things get lost in the system now. Just goes to show you, replacing people with computers may not be the best idea in a lot of situations.
Oh for the days when you could actually talk to a live person(who is actually in this country) when you need help with a problem.

BTW my mother takes Fosfomycin as antibiotic against UTI

Georgia, just a word:
Halleluiah!

Peach ... another victim of the "new & Improved" system.
Where do we write to suggest real people rather than new tech systems?

Don't know why, but the system keeps kicking what I've written out, so I'm gonna try this again...

Kuli, Smart move to put the alarm on the bed! I'm glad that he's doing better & hope that you both got some rest last night!

Sharon, glad that the Sheriff had a heart & helped you!

Rossella, I'm sorry that your Mom has a UTI! No fun at all! I'm glad that you're going to see a doctor yourself! Antidepressants can be a good thing, just remember that they're difficult to get the right one & then the right amount before you start to feel better. Very worth it, though! WOW, that your Mom was in the hospital for 2 months & had her kidney removed! That's major stuff!

Hope every body else is having a good day & will have an easy night!

OK, update on my UTI...I called the doc's office yesterday & they hadn't gotten the results back on the culture yet so I called again this morning since they close at 1:00 on Fridays. You're not gonna believe this...I FINALLY got to the right person in the lab who told me that they didn't have the results because they didn't have enough urine from TUESDAY to do the culture!!! I asked why I hadn't been told before today & that I could have already come in & given them another sample or could have done it while I was there Tuesday. SHe said taht she didn't know. I just slipped through the cracks, so to speak! She told me that I could come back in & give them another sample & they would send it off for a culture, but it would probably be Tuesday before they'd have the results!!! TUESDAY!!! Another blessed weekend!!! I was livid & ended up in tears while I had her on the phone, but there wasn't anything else that she could do! I didn't think I could stand to wait that long...I'm aching all over & I feel l like my whole body has been poisoned...so I went to the ER today. I now have my antibotics...You guessed it, Cipro & Kuli, they suggested Pyridum before I could...YEAH!!! I have started on them & hopefully within 24 hours will feel like a new me!!! I feel like a whipped pup, so I'm gonna go lay down for a bit.

Thanks again for all of the encouragement & advice & for basically just putting up with me! Hugs to all!!!!!

Funky Friday ...
Waiting to hear if Peach has heard from her doc ...

I was surpriesd at our Saturday night - Sunday morning ER visit that the 'entrance' form aready included a list of Dad's meds. Wow! No remembering for me?
Well, I remembered enough to notice that several had been changed &/or discontinued. Had to rack my feeble brain to recall the new ones which had been prescribed by the hospitalist during his last 3 day saty several years ago.

Melding the hospital (now called Medical center) & qall the sattelite offices was supposed to make things simple.

Maybe some day if they get it together ...

SO this morning I think I'll be smart. Called my friend at the pharmacy & asked if she could print out a list of current meds for me to have - not distribute ... but a simple piece of paper I can bring along to appts. & ER trips to ensure everyone is on the same page.

HA! I arrive at the pharamacy drive-- thru, dogs anxiously awaiting their treats ... & a pharmasist has to poke her head out & drill drill me. She was nice but really! We have used the same place for over 20 years! Told her the problems we've had lately with lab reports, etc. being forwarded to the proper places.
Just wanted a list of the meds & doses, & latest, greatest antibiotics, in the event the system had failed us again!
I signed the release form - but felt weird. Thse people are my friends trying to help Dad!
I understand HIPPA & privacy ... what when reports aren't forwarded, whose fault is it?

8 years back Dad tripped over his cat & hit a coffee table. Took him days to admit he was hurting. Another late night ER visit -
Sweet staff! "John! No wonder you hurt! You have 5 fractured ribs!". Old war hero that he is.

Next morning I walked into the pharmacy with the script.

Jean, at the counter, (everyone there loved Dad) hollered out "John ### has 5 busted ribs!!!".
Everyone cooed & awwwed, asked me to give him their best ... etc.
Quite touching!
That was then ...

Kuli, you made me laugh. Memories ...
Several years ago Dad was in the hospital for something, probably a major UTI. On his dismissal day he got up to use the can, tripped over his IV cord, fell ~ busted his pelvis.

Rather than surgery they determined he should be place in a NH & not move from bed for 40 days. Ah sh*t!

The place was really nice! He had a room by the desk, knew all the dirt. He is a great listener. Staff was always in there hanging out with him.
My dogs & I visited often making lots of friends. Each dog had several trusted staff members, depending on the shift. They'd quickly grab a leash & disappear! Share time with their favorite animal loving patients.
What a great feeling peeking in those rooms seeing my dogs enlighten a bedridden person. Many had bee there for years & still may be. In bed.

My Bob Dog was a 100 lb Golden Retriever with the biggest heart & kindest face ... one frail lady who rarely moved, would cimb out of her bed, with assistance, just to give ol Bob a big, lasting hug. She'd bury her face in his neck, stroke his soft ears ...
The med nurse, Nancy, was terrified of dogs, until she met Bob. I think he out-weighed her. She lit up when we'd walk in! They'd savor their rounds together. She had many 'favorite patients.

OK - where was I?
Kuli! Glad he is alarmed! Remember ...Those nurses are paid to stay awake all night. Lord knows a hospital visit means big bucks!

I wish I could earn as much as a prisioner costs to house. How much a day? I'm on call 24 hrs. Hmmmmm ... Paying the mortgage, utilities & food. Not able to work my real job ...

Hope I don't tick off anyone with that off side ~

Cheers ~

Rip

thats too funny, your right they don't forget whats important to them and being stubbron is impoortant that makes them feel like they are in control, my grandmother has this thing about you cant tell me what to do until she needs you. then you her (RAM in the BUSH) then she helpless and forgetful, when she done something that she knows not right and i'm going to say something about it. it's that oh if don't remember, or i foregot or i get the blank look ask if to say i don't care. sometimes thier funny but there those times they make you want to
(i wont say)

So I told the nurse at the hospital last night that dad has a tendency to get confused when he wakes up in an unfamiliar place. She asked if I thought it would be a good idea to put a bed alarm on the bed. I told her I thought that was an excellent idea. My dad immediately climbed into bed and when I told him that she was coming back to put the alarm on there, he said that's why I'm getting into bed, she won't be able to put the alarm on if I'm laying here - in a very snotty tone of voice like a young child. I explained to him that the alarm will only go off if he doesn't call for help before getting out of bed. He ignored me so I said whatever and went home. The nurse apparently won the battle and got the bed alarm on the bed and this morning he said the nurses weren't happy with him around 3:30 am when he set off the alarms. I again explained that no alarms would go off if he would simply call for help before he gets up. Stubborn, stubborn, stubborn. Hard to believe that with all he does forget, he NEVER forgets how to be stubborn!

We have just been blessed beyond belief. My daughter had written a check on an account that she did not know I had closesd. We did not have the money. 20th was court day. Knowing I did not have the money, I wrote the Sheriff. He had someone call me and told me not to worry about it. To pay the check on the first and he is getting the court cost reduced. Please pray for Sheriff Lott and Cpt. Robert Lanier. And ask God to bestow blessings upon them both....Thanks....Sharon

Hi ladies thanks a lot to all of you. My mother has a UTi and we have already the prescription for the bomb-antibiotic, so I hope that she is going to be better. A neurologist is going to see her next monday to evaluate the possibility of changing drugs. On the other hand I realized today that I need a little help, too, because this situation is taking its toll. So I am going to see a neurologist, too, in order to have an antidepressant.
Your advice has been precious.
Kuli, it's okay if your father stays at the hospital for a couple of days. We stayed in the hospital for 2 months last year, when my mother had to have her kidney removed. It was hell. We practically did not sleep for two months, because she had to be controlled constantly. We were 3 people making shifts, but it was very very heavy. Hope I shall not have to do it again.

Kuli, I am so with Def on this one. Unless someone has walked the path that we walk , they can not even imagine. Everyone said that 2 yrs ago, when we had to place dad in a home, the reality it was a nightmare, that lasted a year he has now been home one year. I would work full time, go there everynight, wkends, sometimes 3x's. They would have him so doped up and the food well less than edible to say the least. They loved him cause he never complained. I believe he would have not made it another year in that hell hole... lol ..... At least with him home and i am here it is a bit easier. We definitely need to advocate for them, because we are all they have...... Just like having little one's ....... Hope u get rest and he is home soon.
Hey Rosella, nice to see you. Hope all is well..... Ok PT is here to try to work with dad, be back later.... HUGS to alllll .... Love to all and of course a martini virtual toast to alll... lol angie

Kuli, Sorry Dad is in the hospital again, but that is the best place for him to get straightened out so he can get back home. My sibs. said the same when Mom was in the NH for 4 weeks last year, But it was more tiring due to the 15 minute ride, and trying to be there every night to make sure she ate her dinner. Then I would get her ready for bed because they were short staffed most of the time. Twice a week my brother would go so I could stay home and make dinner for my husband. And if I could get them to go on the weekend I got a little rest. But you are right, you have to advocate for them. Make sure their meds are on time. Make sure they don't give her anything to dope her up so they didn't have to watch her constantly. Bring her meals from home because they fed her tasteless crap. Take her laundry home because they kept losing all her night clothes. It's endless, and unless you have been there, you can't even come close to knowing what it is like!
Please try to get yourself a little bit of rest, or at least get out and do something just for you.
Happy to see he is feeling better and hope you get him home soon.

So my dad's staying in the hospital for a night or two. Funny that some of my friends think it will give me a well deserved rest. The reality is all I do is worry that he'll get confused and not know where he is, that noone will take care of him well enough. Oh, well, what's another sleepless night? Thanks to all of the support comments today. The good news is he said he can breathe 100% better than last night so he may actually get some rest. Hope everyone has a good night and a better day tomorrow. Especially you, GP. I can't believe you are still suffering with this. I'm so sorry for you! And let's all hope noone else finds poopy diapers in the freezer, lol....