My spouse needs me to be around because she is weak and has balance issues after a stroke. I had hopes of traveling in my retirement, but she is not willing to travel with me. She just wants to sit at home all day. We get out to dinner on occasion, but other than that we just stay home. I have become very resentful of her for not taking care of herself and having regular checkups and now her health has suffered from it. If anyone else has been in this situation please tell me how you handled it.
I agree with you about the cellphone being so readily available in the nursing homes and memory cares. People had freedom when phones had a cord. You don't have to take every call from your MIL and shouldn't. You and your husband do as much as you can for her. She can't be allowed to ruin your lives with her constant need for attention and complaining.
Congratulations on the new grand baby. Enjoy this time. In fact, you and your husband should set aside one or two days a week where you do not take any calls from your MIL. Just let them go to voicemail. If the nursing home needs to reach you for some reason on those days, they will not be calling from her cellphone.
Rather than be resentful cultivate the hope that you will discover ways that you can honor your decision to care for spouse until it’s no longer reasonable for you to do so while yet enjoying activities that refresh you and bring more meaning to your life. Life is precious and so is yours all of us should ask God to teach us how to use our days in a way that not only bring us peace and joy but also Gods smile of approval. Best wishes.
Sorry to intrude on the original discussion, but for some reason I couldn't reply to Calister's comment. But to connect it to BobbieJoe's original comment, this is an example of how resentment can build up if you don't take action. BobbieJoe, you've had lots of good suggestions on how to help yourself and your wife move forward with your new reality. I hope you will start with some first steps and keep us posted on how you and your wife are doing as time goes by.