The amount of time and energy I have put into caregiving equates to a third of my life at this point and I feel so alone. Who notices and who cares? It feels like noone. I feel ignored and disrespected by others in regard to my role as a caregiver. From family that are MIA, neighbors/friends complaining to medical staff treating me like I am an annoyance. I am drained emotionally and worse I feel like it is never good enough. I am in such a vulnerable place emotionally it worries me.
Please contact the Hospice and tell them that it still seems as if your grandma is in pain.
Also now that she is on Hospice you can request a Respite stay. They will place her in a Hospice In Patient Unit or they will find a facility that they work with that has a bed available.
You will get a break, hospice will care for her.
the next thing you have to do is talk with the Hospice Social Worker and tell them that you can no longer safely care for her. Your Mental wellbeing is at risk.
If you really have to take her back home you can request a Volunteer that will come and sit with her while you can get out. Typically a Volunteer can be arranged 1 day a week for 3 to 4 hours. the Volunteer can do NO "hands on care" (that is the reason for the 3 to 4 hour limit.) but it will give you a chance to get away from the house.
Ignore friends and neighbors that complain.
Ignore and possibly report medical staff that treats you as an annoyance. You are advocating for someone that can not advocate for themselves.
the next thing you HAVE to do is talk to YOUR doctor make sure they are aware of the stress you are going through and ask for a referral (if you need one) to talk to a therapist.