I'm tired of cooking/preparing 3 meals a day. It's just the two of us but boy oh boy can that woman eat!! She stays slimish, I get fattish. It's bad enough I do everything here much less start making her one thing and me the other. At times I feel guilty when I buy her fast food cuz of the nutritional value....not to mention I eat it too.
Hang in there.
I hope you’re successful in getting your mom placed in the same place as your dad.
It’s stressful to deal with all of this.
I have more chin hairs too. I hate it!
In all of this he had contacted the fraud dept. and received a phone call from a guy would claimed to be in the fraud dept. but asked some questions that R found suspicious. R was downtown close to the bank branch so kept this guy talking and walked over and got ahold of the bank manager and signalled her. She checked it out and said it was not their fraud dept.
They think it must be someone within their system who is accessing the account as the money R deposited after the bank making changes and R getting a new card happened so quickly. My other accounts are fine. The "fraud" guy has had the nerve to call R back since and has been told off. The bank are making some changes that they say will work, He will get his money back eventually.
The bank manager said she had only heard of this sort of thing once before.
Pretty nasty stuff.
First the fires , then the bear, now fraud.
Hopefully that’s it , you’ve hit the trifecta .
Does anyone have any experience with replacing weeping tile or installing French drains?
MD - it's always some thing.
sorry I don’t know anything about French drains or weeping tile
Riverdale, thx for your info. It's a full basement and the leaking is in one bedroom when it rains heavily. It seeps down through the windows though I had new windows installed in 2016. The windows wells are very deep and R suspects that the weeping tile wasn't done well. The floor is concrete and we have laminate over top.
The house is over 40 years old so from my reading I gather that the weeping tile could be plugged by now. The backfill on these houses is honestly garbage and the lawn wasn't sloped away from the house.
In addition after last years sewer pipe fiasco, the lawn right by that corner of the house has sunk so water is flowing towards the house. As well the downspout needs to be directed totally away from there b/c the ground at the corner gets so soggy.
R will redo the downspout and then we will wait for another rain and see if that works. The rest of the basement is fine. If that isn't enough I think we are looking at French drains or weeping tile replacement. I guess the French drain are cheaper?
Superstorm Sandy must have been awful!!!
bearied or buried?
i'm kidding. golden ❤️, i really hope it all gets fixed soon.
We did just that a few months ago but the flexible addition leading 10' away was screwed on but not sealed and I think some water still comes out at the join if the rain is heavy. Doing this has cut down the amount of water seeping in by a long shot so R, who has done this in a house in Edmonton, says he will redirect the downspout over to the fence and then along there to empty where the ground is lower and slopes down to the street.
We can't bury here because of the ground freezing. I had suggested that and R said it brings lots of problems in the spring when the frozen ice in the spout and addition is thawing and blocking the flow. I get that.
It is a very deep basement. The basement windows are below ground level with very deep window wells. Just badly done by the builders. For years we didn't have any problems, but since the forest fire and our encounter with the water bomber, we have had seeping/flooding in heavy rains in that corner only. it definitely shook something up. That's why I have wondered if the weeping tile was disturbed/blocked.
I think it has been worse since the back yard was dug up last year to repair the drains. Hard to say but part of the lawn in that corner sank a couple of inches after the repairs were done though the digging was at the bottom of the garden away from the house. All that soil disturbance didn't help!
We are not actually getting standing water in that area, thankfully. Last year too an additional complication is that the neighbour on that side raised the strip of his land along his house with gravel and concrete blocks right by our fence and that corner of the house so we get his drainage from that. That extra drainage doesn't help either.
It is much improved since we put in that flexible addition so we are hoping that redirecting the downspout 10 ' away from that corner with all joints sealed will do it. Possibly caulking the windows as well. I know that is where it is coming in.
2016, the year this all started, the restorers had pulled off the wet dry wall and there was a heavy rain. I saw it seeping in under the windows. That's why I thought French drains in that area might help. It is only in that corner. The window in the room next door is fine. We've never had a problem there.
My understanding is that French drains or replaced weeping tile can be done from the outside with digging - considerable in our case. We have foundation/ waterproofing people here who can do it from the outside. It would likely be expensive as a backhoe or something like that would be needed.
Anyway thank so much for your information. We can't repair that room until we know it is waterproof and I can't put the house up for sale until then and the repairs have been done. So the next step is the downspout and window caulking and wait for a heavy rain.
Any more wisdom/experience is most welcome.
Will this ever be over so I can get out of here???
FIL is in ICU critical condition with respiratory failure and heart failure since late yesterday . He is a DNR . DH has to leave on business trip to the west coast 3,000 miles away , tomorrow through Wednesday . He can’t get out of this trip last minute. I’m stuck with this by myself for now. FIL has gone into respiratory failure twice before since January but this is the first time he’s also in heart failure . Today FIL was very angry . I feel bad for him . He just wants it to be over he said . Depending on how the next few days go , It may be time for palliative care in SNF or hospice . DH doesn’t want to deal with FIL’s anger if he can’t go back to ALF
Sorry you are having an IBS flare up too. No fun. For me it is part of the CFS/FM.
So sorry to hear about your fil and that you are going to be "Johnny (Janie?) on the spot" as dh has to be away with work. Sounds like fil is quite ill. I quite understand that dh doesn't want to deal with fil's anger. It's a difficult time all around. I can only pray that he goes fast as his QOL is sliding downhill fast. I hope that is not inappropriate. May fil find some peace in his last days, and may you and dh be at peace also. ((((((hugs)))))
I was kidding about the house .
Thanks for your kind words . I agree faster would be better for FIL . Who knows . He may partially bounce back until the next episode . But I told DH today that I question whether he will be able to go back to ALF even if he improves .
To me it sounds like fil is unlikely to be able to go back to the AL. On the other hand, you don't know. At one point my father was in hospital and mother was told his liver and kidneys were failing and she should prepare for the end. His heart and lungs fortunately (?) were very good. Two weeks later he was sitting in the garden in a deck chair looking good and enjoying life. Never had liver or kidney problems again. He was 76 then and lived another 5 years. Though, honestly if he had gone it might have been better. He would have been spared the indignity of vascular dementia and a slow decline in those 5 years.
Yup, they bounce back sometimes . It’s amazing . Time will tell what happens .
This is his third time since January that he was lucky (? ) to have someone walk in his room and recognize he was in distress. Yesterday it was me when I brought him some dinner. .
I hope you feel better soon. Your mom must have surprised you and everyone else with how long she lived. Sometimes, I still shake my head over how long you oversaw her care.
Way,
The stress never ends with caregiving. I hope that everything will go as smoothly as possible for all of you. These situations are never easy to deal with.