I'm tired of cooking/preparing 3 meals a day. It's just the two of us but boy oh boy can that woman eat!! She stays slimish, I get fattish. It's bad enough I do everything here much less start making her one thing and me the other. At times I feel guilty when I buy her fast food cuz of the nutritional value....not to mention I eat it too.
"Can't come, maybe next time."
Married now for more than 30 years, the parents of my 24 year old grandson, and she now claims I love him more than I love her!
All tongue in cheek, of course, but that "loving him"--I don't love him more than her, because I love her to the moon and back, but I sure do love him lots and lots and lots. And they both know it.
OMG ,
That reminds me of my MIL when my first child was going to be born . MIL was giving me the longest explanation about how she wouldn’t be around when my son was born because she had scheduled a trip with friends and she could not ask them to change it after she had asked them to schedule for the week after my due date to begin with .
I truly didn’t care that she would not be around, In fact I was glad . BUT…… she blamed it on me for “ missing my due date” !!!
She said had I given birth on time she would be in town but now she won’t be .
Again I was fine with it . My parents couldn’t stand my MIL either . MIL not being around would avoid potential running into each other at the hospital .
Then she added, “ besides babies are born everyday , I’ll meet him when I get back “.
Send , I know it’s not the same though , a wedding is one day . But it reminded me of this anyway .
But we are still happily married for 46 years now.
Out of all her SILs my mother bashed my husband the most before we were married. He’s now the one who visits her everyday when we are in NYC, even when I don’t go if you can imagine that.
My two BILs don’t go at all.
My daughter is trying to keep her wedding plans small , but fiancé has a big family. Sometimes she tells me she wishes it was just parents , siblings , siblings partners and a very few close friends . Other times she says to just elope . ( I could see her doing this , like me she avoids confrontation in certain areas, and will fight to the death in a few others ) .
She bought her dress online , its at my house . They have not set a date . They both would like to not have a long time between setting a date and the actual wedding , mostly because fiancé thinks his mother will expect a large tadoo and will drive them crazy over wedding planning . The bride and groom prefer low key , without the big stressful windup ahead of time . We will see what happens . I’ll show up when and where I’m told .
It should have been a joyful phone call not a discussion about day to day life.
Life went on afterwards and our relationship (both the good and the bad) continued but I never forgot it. I actually never asked her to babysit. I had other family nearby so it was not necessary to ever ask.
But it was a memorable statement.
Geez,
I didn’t forget my MIL’s many unbelievable statements over the years either . BUT she does !!
All she does remember is the times I lived my own life instead of doing it her way .
I remember what they said. Fortunately for me, I had a good friend, about 12 years older, who was a compassionate mentor to me all through the hard times.
But then my dH walked into the room, bringing me a plate with a treat on it.
It was a ripened kiwi, cut into a flower. A beautiful green flower, with black seeds.
Oldies are playing on the Roku. What a wonderful world by Louis Armstrong.
I see trees of green
Red roses too
I see them bloom
For me and you
And I think to myself
What a wonderful world
I see skies of blue
And clouds of white
The bright blessed day
The dark sacred night
And I think to myself
What a wonderful world
The colors of the rainbow
So pretty in the sky
Are also on the faces
Of people going by
I see friends shaking hands
Saying, "How do you do?"
They're really saying
I love you
I hear babies cry
I watch them grow
They'll learn much more
Than I'll ever know
And I think to myself
What a wonderful world
Yes, I think to myself
What a wonderful world.
Have a great day everyone! The sun is shining, fluffy white clouds outside.
77 degrees F.
That's where I will be.
I’m not holding grudges . It’s just the things that MIL says are so “ different “ than a normal mother would say …that it sticks in the back of my memory and comes to the front of my mind when something reminds me and I just shake my head . That being said , I don’t put up with her nonsense either . I may get angry for a bit like the other night but then I brush it aside . It is much easier to brush aside because I never liked the woman to begin with . It was harder to deal with some of the things my own ( narcissist ) mother pulled and said even later when I knew she had dementia , because I loved her . Many others had even worse narcissist mothers than mine was . I did Ok dealing with Mom until she got dementia , and she got much more difficult and refused care , living in her own filth etc . But she’s passed at peace now . 2 days ago was 5 years.
We told them I was pregnant in person (they were visiting) and was promptly informed that they would never babysit. Trust me, never left our children in their care.
My husband’s mother wasn’t any better than my own.
MIL was something else . You could always count on her to say the stupidest dumbest most insulting thing at the most in opportune time.
It was an amazing talent. She’s gone now but those memories linger.
MiL also wanted to take the kids to places for the first time , the zoo, the movies, a play, the beach . NOPE wasn’t happening . She said I was taking her rights as a grandmother away because I wouldn’t let her take them anywhere . I told her those “firsts are for the parents “ . We wanted to see our children’s first reactions to seeing animals , the ocean etc .
You were smart to not allow visitors . I wish I had done that . I did not know that my mother was going to come over so often when I brought the kids home .
I don’t understand mothers who demand to be in the delivery room . No way would I have wanted either one in there .
Here's another one for you: Years ago my husband's brother and his wife regretted not having a nuptial mass when they married. They decided to have that mass and renew their vows, which was a nice thing to do.
However MIL began telling me that DH and I were not really married because we didn't have a mass when we married. We were married by a priest in church. Apparently it became not good enough. Told her it is legal in the eyes of the state which, when it is all said and done, is all that matters.
MIL also worried that because we did not go to church that we wouldn't be all together in heaven. Can I just say that spending eternity with my MIL would be my idea of hell.
A Mass is not a requirement for a wedding. This is a perfect example of an overly zealous individual!
Personally, I feel like the couple should be married anywhere they desire! It’s their day!
Some people are insane!
Did you accidentally change a setting using the widget? That’s all I can think of.
That would be a dreadful thought for some!
You sound like a reality tv show! Tons of drama!
I don’t know which television show has more drama, a soap opera or a reality tv show.
Trying to stop relationships, saying a marriage is not legal, wanting to be in a delivery room, choosing an engagement ring.. they have ZERO respect that other people get to decide things for themselves.
I had one in-law that was upset with our choice of baby name (had wanted to use it first - we didn't even know). Another that dropped endless hints of what name they liked (was upset we didn't use it).
Just shows you can't please 'em all!
I was upset at both at the time but feel I got off lightly now!
I'm picturing all those MILs as female Foghorn Leghorns.
Puffed up loud-mouthed chickens 🐔
Every family has some lunatics in it, right? Some worse than others! 😝
I had TWO MIL ‘s because FIL divorced and remarried after the kids were grown . His second wife is deceased but there are plenty of stories there as well mostly directed at her own adult kids and my FIL. We were careful and tried to stay under her radar for the most part . FIL sure knew how to pick them !!! Sheez!!
Send, I noticed the sinus blaster stuff has horseradish as a primary ingredient. That's interesting! I have wasabi powder, and I'd eat it plain if it would make me better. 😜
And as often as I've been getting problematic sinus issues the past five years, I need more tools, so thank you very much. I wonder if I have sensitivities from the "mold house." URIs (thanks for the acronym) have become a yearly occurrence for me. Colloidal silver spray worked well for me, but I'm out of it.
I ordered capsaicin & horseradish and colloidal silver sprays. Capsaicin & horseradish cannot feel good on one's sinuses, but neither does peroxide or what I've been dealing with for the past several weeks... and every single year in the past 5 years...
...
I turned my paper in. I have more questions than answers, which maybe is the hallmark of a good education.
I'm in an applied behavior analysis MS degree. ABA is viewed as a limited-scope psychology methodology. However, relational frame theory and contextual behavior science are based on behaviorism's principles and came from behavior analysts Dermot Holmes and Greg Hanley. There's a lot of crossover in behaviorism psychology and its principles and theories to many different important and emerging modern-day therapies and applications. I see ABA as having relevance in a great many things, including behavioral gerontology, where ABA is currently used... but ABA's not used nearly as much as it should be in gerontology, imho. That probably has to do with learning theory and the fact that dementias significantly decrease learning ability.
If anyone's curious, I'd happily discuss these concepts as best I can. It's interesting to me. Thanks for the support. 💜
Finally did. I'm allergic to dust.
Took Zyrtec for several years. Finally found a really good air purifier that filters most of the dust in my apartment. Gave up the Zyrtec. Haven't had a sinus infection in years.
Ymmv.