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Oh, Barb.

If this is sepsis (wasn't aware of this) it is so iffy and a moment to moment thing. They just must find out where the bleeding is coming from and it must be stopped. They are pouring in a lot of blood. I hope hubby stays in ICU.

Barb, dependent on how this daughter typically "is" I am telling her if she is any way reasonable. You will be blamed if she isn't told. I would tell hubby she has a right to know that this is serious. If she isn't a reasonable type then don't and you can always tell her "Your father didn't want you told and I honored his wishes in that; I am doing best I can. Sorry". I have two daughters. One I would tell no matter what "he" said and one I would not. Because in the latter case it could make trouble for all involved in this fight.

I am so sorry. Fight for him to stay in ICU. As long as these bacteria causing sepsis are kept at bay with antibiotics he has a good chance. But organs can shut down fast with sepsis if antibiotics don't work and I feel his daughter should know. Encourage her not to fly in as he's uncomfortable and there's nothing she can do to help that. Mostly, do it YOUR WAY.
Are you getting rest? Do you go home to sleep? How far from hospital are you?

I personally think that when you are looking at a bleed you can't stop let alone identify and sepsis that a discharge planner showing up is kind of ludicrous, but that's me. I am certain well meaning. I know she doesn't mean "today!"

Yikes. Truly thinking of you so much.
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No, no sepsis. "Just" Hypovolemic shock.
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GOOD Barb, on the no sepsis thing.
Trust you to know what is best for letting daughter know.
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Barb, I am relieved it’s not sepsis. Hope they find the bleed and he improves soon.
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I got DH's permission to email both his daughter and one brother.

My stepdaughter is a lovely, non histrionic young woman. We've known each other since she was 7; I was an administrator at the day camp she attended for many years. My relationship with her predates my meeting her dad by about 15 years

And we've been down this road before, when my DH had emergency surgery for an aortic aneurysm.

Thanks for all your support!
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Barb, I'm truly relieved that DH is in your good and capable hands, and that he chose to tell his daughter and brother. Before my Mom moved up her to MN, she used to withhold info about herself/her health and it only made me fret about her more, not less.
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Barb, thinking of you & your DH today - may this QUICKLY resolve.
Sending more support your way I'm glad you could share with his DD too. ❤️❤️
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AMAZING NEWS No active bleed. They are able to start him back on anticoagulation meds (very low dose and quickly reversible) shortly!
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So very relieved for you and your DH, Barb! Wonderful news!
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Barb That's great. So good to hear. Sounds like he is on his way to recovery. ((((hugs))))
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Good news Barb. DH is a lucky guy to have you standing guard. I’m sure his DD is grateful for you. Hugs.
Drink some water. Deep breaths. Thanks for keeping us up to date.
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The head Honcho ICU doc said to me yesterday that wives like me are why married men, statistically, live longer than single ones.

It was a proud moment. And my bonus daughter thanked (after the initial procedure) for taking such good care of her dad. I told her that everyone needs a hobby.
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Barb,

Good news. And that doc is right.
I saved my husband as well after a potentially fatal complication after surgery . I took him back to the hospital a few days after surgery .
My DH tells people that I keep him alive .
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Barb, Such good news. Please get some rest.
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One more thought.

My mom, a very wise woman, who, as a medical secretary during WWII did lots of the jobs usually reserved for RNs (because the RNs were all in the Service) used to tell me that when someone is the hospital "you need the standing up person and the lying down person". It was such a a funny way to phrase, but it's always stuck with me.
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Barb: Prayers sent for your DH and you, too.
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Barb, I so agree. That is a great phrase, "the standing up person and the lying down person".
Hope things are still going well.
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Barb,

It sounds like you have a terrific relationship with your stepdaughter. I am glad that you told her about her dad.
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More gratitude. Thee folks on this floor coded today, including the 30yo in the next room. This of course happened just as DH says "I gotta go". Poor guy is quite backed up from 3 days of opiates.

The only reason I know how to operate and bedpan and chucks is because of what I've learned here over the years.

My husband was beyond grateful...and shocked that I knew how to do this. I said you guys get all the credit. Especially CountryMouse, wherever she is
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Barb, you need to be collecting a salary. With overtime!!! Are you getting rest for yourself?
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Barb,

I wonder how Countrymouse is doing. I miss seeing her posts. Talk about a knowledgeable and extremely sensible woman. She never pulled any punches. She told it like it was. I have a lot of respect for her and learned from her too.
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DH walked 1/10 mile today! The robot is back in the closet.
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Barb,

Yay 😁!

Fantastic news! One step at a time, right?

So happy to hear this news.
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Barb: Bravo to your DH for walking a tenth of a mile today! Praises that he got some relief. How sad that three people coded.

I, too, miss CountryMouse and wonder how she is on 'the other side of the pond.'
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Barb -that progress is totally awesome!!!! So glad DH has turned the corner and the robot is in the closet. YAY!!!
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97: Thank you for your post on CountryMouse!
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Glad to see the Robot put back in the closet. Undoubtedly muttering to itself in chagrin.
Glad of hubby being up and about and it's the best way to keep that blood circulating in the right way. Always such a relief when patients can get moving at all. What good news.
Back when I used to make and pain a lot of earrings I made a pair just white with slashed of primary colors town top to bottom, and the word "lifesaver" in Silver painted vertically down them. Used to wear them to work and risk patients tearing them out of my ears. Ended having to make them for the whole 8th floor crew. I think you would get a pair for certain. What a lifesaver you have been here! And I am so glad they all recognize that.
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Good afternoon! A cautionary tale follows--

I came home from the hospital last night dead tired and feeling spacey. I took my BP and it was 170+/140+.

I realized my bottle of BP meds was in front of me. I had been toting them around since the ambulance on Monday but I not sure if I taken any this week. Maybe one?

I texted my friend the NP and discussed my options. I took a pill. Talked for a few minutes, she told me I should either call my doc or go to ER.

I took BP again and it was 200+/100+.

I knew what my doc would say,(go to ER). So I went in a cab. BP came down a bit with no treatment. All blood work, chest x-ray, heart attack markers, etc were fine.

Came home. Took the day off from hospital. Called my doc. He's prescribing an additional BP med.

Hard to do self care in the thick of things. But do add actually TAKE your meds during a crises. Don't just put the bottle in your tote!!
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Just as I suspected. Barb. Please. You must take care of yourself in this.
You can't afford to risk your health for HIM as well as for yourself.
Thanks for the cautionary tale. This was a hard won lesson. I am thankful you got yourself into care before you did yourself a tiny stroke of some kind. Or worse.

You MUST take some time for you. Must.
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