I'm tired of cooking/preparing 3 meals a day. It's just the two of us but boy oh boy can that woman eat!! She stays slimish, I get fattish. It's bad enough I do everything here much less start making her one thing and me the other. At times I feel guilty when I buy her fast food cuz of the nutritional value....not to mention I eat it too.
Thanks. These things never get any easier, do they?
I will never get used to losing people that are so young.
I suppose that we aren’t supposed to dwell on the number of years that people have lived.
We should be grateful that they were in our lives for any length of time, no matter how brief.
There are times when I believe that we are all assigned a number. When that number is up, we die. If the number isn’t up, against all odds, we live.
I had a gun pointed directly at my heart. I begged for my life. I was only 18.
I was told by the man robbing me that he was going to kill me. It wasn’t my time to die.
So sorry ,
It’s terrible for a life to be cut so short. And of course you empathize with the parents losing a child and your daughter losing a friend .
Some people get only such short lives. It breaks hearts & is so unfair. I cannot imagine the family's pain.
Visited my mother. She was speaking very rudely to staff. My husband had opted to come along, so went in and calmed her. Distracted her. She responds better to men.
I came into her field of view (after replenishing her supplies) and he absentmindedly referred to me by name. And that’s when she ordered us out. He was shocked and asked if she meant for us to leave. She made herself clear - in no uncertain terms.
Silly me, still hoping she’ll stop being nasty to me. I get it - she’ll always direct all her anger and blame at me. She’d rather have no visitors (I have cousins who visit 2x year) than see me. My friends think I’m pleasant and fun. So he, I and my hurt feelings left.
By the way, I am the same Ana(banana) as before. My entire account/history was deleted overnight.
I agree with Golden , you can drop things off with her name on them at the receptionist at the front desk lobby , the receptionist can have the staff bring them to her room . I did that with my Mom periodically as well .
For awhile though , I couldn’t drop off because my mother loved to sit by the front door to watch who came and left and she would ambush me , yell at me about how I was such a “ rotten daughter”. She got satisfaction of having an audience see her berate me . The small open lobby where she sat was at the corner of the big common living room full of other residents sitting . So I then started calling the front desk first before I went into the building to see if Mom was sitting at the lobby . My Mom sat across from the receptionist who answers the phone . If Mom was there , the receptionist would send a staff member to the parking lot to meet me at my car to get supplies .
One time the activities director was there when Mom berated me . The director turned to my mother and flat out told her . “ If I was your daughter I wouldn’t visit anymore .” My mother came right back with “ well you aren’t “ .
After that whenever I visited and the activity director walked passed us , my mother complained how she didn’t like that woman . 😝😜🤪
ana - I'm sorry your account was deleted. Maybe admin can restore it. I found I had to prioritize self protection. Otherwise it was too hard on me. It's no good getting bashed again and again. Can your hub or kids do the supplies? Or, as way suggested, have the staff get them from you in the parking lot.
My whine is that I can't make it to my dgds 21st birthday meal. I'm just not feeling up to the drive. and on top of that my guts are iffy so staying at home is safer. Not happy about this!!!
Golden, feel better!
Hope you feel better , sorry you missed the party .
Gershun ,
Feel better soon. My neighbors had it again recently too were pretty sick . Maybe because the newer strain , previous immunity isn’t a great match ???? Just a guess .
Thanks for the support, ladies. Feeling better today so I will try again to make the trip. Dgd is off work till 4 so maybe we can yet have a visit. I have been checking out Uber as an alternative., It's cheaper than a taxi for sure.
I was double vaccinated when we were in the thick of covid but didn't get the booster shots. The virus keeps mutating so there would be no end to getting shots.
But I have to say that the last four days have been pretty hellish. No breathing difficulty so I think I'm safe that way but I have all the other symptoms. Wondering now if I should just get all the booster shots.
I guess covid is here to stay.
I had it recently (again). Found 2 weeks I needed to go slow, to restore physical energy but mostly BRAIN energy this time.
I am playing around with nutritious smoothies & homemmade soups + taking vitamin D.
Best wishes for your FULL recovery 🙏 ❤️
My sister left me with the details and I thought I rose to the challenge. Unfortunately there was a misunderstanding with the pictures that were scanned. I loaded her pictures that she gave me to the funeral home website after I gave the funeral home the ones I scanned. Unfortunately her pictures were not included in the video loop where the funeral was. I did call to apologize after the funeral director informed me how upset my sister was. Today I pointed out if she felt so strongly about planning this funeral she should be opted to be at the meeting with the funeral director and not consoling someone else on the death of their loved one.
I thought everything was okay a few weeks ago. It was not. I had to call her for some other reason which got her really angry and then brought this
Between that and the fact she feels put upon visiting our father in the NH it was a miserable conversation. She is upset he has a fungus which she insists is because they left him in bed on Sunday. It don't think it is. It is because he is in adult disposable underwear. The facility has been treating it, the doctor checks it every week. They can't seem to get it cleared up. She is all upset because it spread. I told her at 95, something is going to get the better of him. I cannot worry so much anymore about keeping him going. Mom is gone and there is absolutely nothing left for him to live for. He is only living as long as he is because he is getting good care at this facility, otherwise he would have been gone a long time ago.
I told her visit as little or as much as you want, that is why he is where he is. Or bring him to her house or put him in another Medicaid facility. Those are her options.
I decided to block her, don't want to talk to her anymore. You cannot make this stuff up. Who knows if she reads this site, I really don't care. Being on the receiving end of her wrath is more devastating than my mother dying.
If anybody reads through this miserable story, just thanking you. There is nothing anyone can say. I feel better posting it for posterity.
I’m sorry you had to deal with all that .
I don’t blame you for blocking calls .
On a side note , family photo and videos at funerals ?? I just don’t get it . When did funerals become a show?? I don’t think I would even load any pictures if asked except for photos of the deceased ??
But then again I am a very private griever to begin with . So I have a different mindset . I’m the let’s get it over with and go home type . I went straight home after my mother’s funeral . No partying with family afterwords.
I am hurt and angry because she is always going to remember me as the person who ruined her mother's funeral for her. I don't think I deserve that.
”ruined her mother’s funeral for her “.
You don’t deserve that.
OMG, I don’t even know where to start with that , it’s so ridiculous , I don’t even think your sister grieving is an excuse , IMO .
What individual joy and recognition was she expecting to get at her mother’s funeral ??
That sounds like a crazy, bent out of shape about something minor , mother of the groom or mother of the bride who forget that their child’s wedding is not about them .
Your mother’s funeral was NOT about your sister !! Sheez . I’m with your husband , I would have hung up .
You also lost your mother and are grieving , don’t accept drama or blame of anything during the caregiving .
That can happen after a parent dies . It’s like the post game analysis . You don’t need it from family . We all do enough of that in our own heads .
I do realize for the time being you feel you have to deal with each other until Dad passes . I felt the same way and put up with cr4p .
It’s a relief when you don’t have to anymore .
You "ruined" your mother's funeral? That is ridiculous. If your sister wanted every detail of it to be 'just so' (I absolutely detest this expression to my very core, but for lack of a better term), why didn't she miss out on the wedding and make sure she planned every detail?
Honestly, you should have slapped her one. I think I would have.