I'm tired of cooking/preparing 3 meals a day. It's just the two of us but boy oh boy can that woman eat!! She stays slimish, I get fattish. It's bad enough I do everything here much less start making her one thing and me the other. At times I feel guilty when I buy her fast food cuz of the nutritional value....not to mention I eat it too.
So, what can she do? Make grocery lists? Check grocery lists for over-charging (I don't do that but I know old people who do). Chop veggies or whatever to eat?
Perhaps sit down and make a weekly menu with you and, with her, determine both the cost, time, and calorie intake.
You are lucky in some ways. Usually, in my experience, old folks aren't eating enough or not getting proper nutrition. There is a silver lining!
Give her some "homework." If she's not willing, perhaps it's time to look into a nursing home.
Weekly menu's? Check grocery lists? Calorie intake? Chop veggies?
Am I doing something wrong? I surely do not do any of this.
Homework? If she's not willing? Good grief.... nursing home?
Hobblessmom, please tell me what I am missing with caring for my AD mother?
I thought about menu prep and the other things that were suggested. I feel glad that my mother can still make her own breakfast, do some laundry, and wash dishes. I don't even mind that the dishes aren't very clean. I know that soon she won't be able to do these things.
So the house is decorated and everything is falling together for Christmas. I have my sensitivity meter switched to non-combat mode. Holidays are rough, because my mother wants to micromanage. I know it won't matter what I do, since next year (if there is one) she'll take credit for everything I did this year. It is funny. Each year I do certain things. Then the next year she'll tell me that last year SHE did these things. I've learned to just let her take credit, because it really doesn't matter. I just tell her she certainly did a wonderful job last year. :)
My mom is similar to yours, but with early-to-mid-stage dementia thrown in. She can dress herself, shower herself, and doesn't have the pacing, restlessness or random verbal outbursts that come later - she has the memory loss and personal care neglect (unless pushed) issues.
She showered Monday, and twice after that, I had to remind her that she had already showered. Once when she went back into the bathroom to put on an incontinence pad, which she had forgotten, and later, when I asked her how the new tub mat I bought felt under her feet when she showered - she looked at me blankly and said, "How would I know - I haven't been in there today!" Um....yes you were.....
Today she's in what she calls "sloth mode" - sleeping all day. She's been up long enough to go to the bathroom twice, eat breakfast and then back down again. She sat up about an hour ago, then laid back down 5 minutes later...then back up in 15 minutes...then back down again. I guess at the very least, I can be thankful for some time to myself while she's sleeping...? I get a whole lot more done with my work and housework if she's asleep.
My eldest is a dressage rider and rides at Grande Priz level. She has a very pretty black morgan stallion she has trained herself. Doesn't help your problems with your mother but I know you love horses.
As far as the early stages of dementia are concerned I think It is very difficult to distinguish them from the forgetfulness of getting older which we all experience. One thing is for sure she is not going to get any nicer. Maybe stick her on the top of the Christmas tree with duct tape over her mouth.
2 staples in her head later.... bet her a** sleep tonight.
mine too.
Went next door to the grocery store and the guy that collects the carts rushed over to me grabbed the cart and said" I"ll put those in the back seat for you get in the car out of the cold young lady" Well I do enjoy the attention but am not sure about the young lady part. i guess when someone calls me "grandma' I will have to say I'm not your grandma" haven't decided yet. I don't mind people using my first name Mrs sounds stuffy these days.