I'm tired of cooking/preparing 3 meals a day. It's just the two of us but boy oh boy can that woman eat!! She stays slimish, I get fattish. It's bad enough I do everything here much less start making her one thing and me the other. At times I feel guilty when I buy her fast food cuz of the nutritional value....not to mention I eat it too.
So today is our selling open day and I was woken at stupid o'clock to yet another explosion and her saying we have to cancel Im nmot well.
Well when I went to put her diaper in the bin I noticed some tablet outers - the foil things...now they are always in my bin outside so I was curious and found the senna. 3 hours later and with windows open, the room still smells a little yukky but i have hosed the commode down outside, deep cleaned and then steamed the carpet - luckily most went on the plastic which is now in the bin.
9:27 and she say I want to go back to bed.....well sorry Mum this time you can't
Susan, wow... you got a lot of great idea's for moms nosebleeds. Uhm, hehe, so I shall just toss mine in as well. This is more to stop/slow the bleeding. So, the paramedic who taught our CPR classes at school for the past 15 years has always told us to take tissue and put it up under your top lip and apply firm pressure. Apparently the majority of the little blood vessels are there and that stops the blood supply. Just a thought :) Don't work so hard...give yourself a break sweetie!
Gershun, nothing wrong with attending a grief support meeting or getting grief counseling. I'm waiting for them to call me about mine. I can't stoically keep blocking everything out, it just isn't working and making things worse. Just a few days ago I cleaned the fridge out and was balling when I tossed her barely touched apple sauce/pudding and Ensure out... I see her little hair pins, her favorite after bath powder and her lipstick she loved to wear and I cry. Cry cry cry... if God gives points for tears shed I should be top 10 in line. Sigh. Like now, the tears well up typing this up. I so miss my little cutie patootie. I keep wondering why mother, a woman full of life and fun should end up with such a horrible disease and be allowed to suffer the indignities of it. It's just not right and they'd better find a freaking cure for this. Okay... enuf or I will wreck my day thinking about it all over again.
Thanks girls, my pib is doing better although she's a bit sluggish from her meds. Dog bites are bad, dog bites in a dogs mouth ...not good! CM, you are so correct on Staffie's dispositions...she's very mannerly and seems offended around not so nice pups. Is your Staffie a pure Staff?... Sydney has to be at least 3/4 staff and has the cutest big muscly butt you ever saw :) I love to watch her walk with her big ham back quarter swishing side to side and her big bowling ball head. yep.... love my pibble fer sure!
The pool is almost FULL ! Heck if I hadn't turned to water off last night it would be full. I was afraid it would run over by the time I crawled out of bed. Last night I had a big fire going in the fire pit, soft rock playing, drink in hand and kicked back the my girls and enjoyed the peaceful evening. Mom would have loved it.. she enjoyed sitting out at the fire pit roasting marsh mellows or hot dogs...oh great, here I go again, sniff.
Ha, I'd love for someone to dare come visit me and stay over. They'd be turned into a house keeper real quick like. Vacuum in one hand, windex in the other!!
Ok... what to do today what to do?
Thanks for the suggestion, Jeanette.
My mood swings are crazy wild this week - must be (what used to be) that time of the month. I no longer have all of my equipment, so I don't *have* that time of the month, but I do have the crazy-hormone-creating-ones, so once a month, my moods go a little haywire. Happy one minute, almost in tears the next. Just spent 20 minutes detailing Mom's day to my brother on the phone and telling him why NO, I can't go out to breakfast with them tomorrow. Appreciate the offer and glad he asked, but almost wished he hadn't - and I'm sure he felt the same way after he listened to me whine. His statement? "Well, maybe it's closer to time to put mom in a nursing home than you think." (sigh) They just don't get it. As difficult as caring for her is becoming, she is *not* nursing home material. She is still able to walk and care for herself, but needs reminders on everything - and she's not going to get that in a nursing home. We are in that in-between stage, where she is not safe to stay home alone, but is not yet nursing home qualified. You all know what I'm talking about - better than anyone else would.
Jude, it's funny how much knowledge we gain as caregivers. I have always been a voracious reader and have always had a thirst for knowledge. If I don't know how to do something, I learn through reading - and with the advent of the internet, that's even easier to do now. If Mom develops some new issue, I learn all I can about it and figure out how to deal with it. Medicine and anatomy have always fascinated me, so I kind of had a head start when I moved in with Mom. Her homecare nurse and therapist have told me a few times now that they thought I must have a medical background because of how I handle things with Mom - I told them no, I don't - I just read a lot and listen when the doctors tell me what's going on, so I know how to handle things at home.
8600 gallons is a lot of water.. it isn't quite full either, maybe another 1600
yeegads I am scared now!! LOL
Susan, I have been asked if I have a medical background too. One way I have been dealing with all this is to learn as much as I can about everything and be hands on too. It helps to deal with it all if I tell myself " I am a nurse by necessity" to make it better, to keep Mom comfortable and pain free and for me to keep learning.
Jude, I hope your Mom is feeling better soon.... I am sure that the clinic where you are getting this training could learn a thing or two from you! Experience means a whole lot more than some young kids having read it from a book only!
Susan - I wonder if it is just that time of the month period... I have thought it could be "that time of month" for me as well this week but mine stopped early in life over 10 years ago. I know what you mean about the crying when you look at something of your mother's. I don't know if I am worse since I look at something of my mother's and can not think of how I would be able to get rid of it after she has gone. She is still alive and already I am crying over what I may or may not have to part with.
My mother's 80th birthday is Monday. Neither of us feel much like celebrating. Please God let me somehow give her a good day.
I won't vaccum or windex though. :)
For dad I do not know if I want all of that. We had mom's funeral back where they lived most of their lives as mom passed away unexpectedly 10 weeks after I moved them closer to me. Only a cousin has visited dad in the year plus since moving oh and one disaster visit from one of moms sister. I would rather have something by me and if relatives cannot drive the 1 1/2 hr oh well.
Not sure what my sister thinks but I suppose I won't worry about it until the time comes.
Jeanette, excellent idea re the stay over but fid luck getting mine to do that. .lol. this morning i actually toughened up a bit . I got up early, as always, Mama was good but not wanting to have her bath yet. The cousin sure want moving and did not move till almost ELEVEN!!!! I had gotten Mama's bath, etc and gone through a pot of coffee. I die not get my company her coffee this time. I told her coffee and cinnamon rolls in kitchen, help yourself. She seemed in shock but when i went and got me another cup and didn't bring hers i think she saw i meant it and room service was over.
I developed a horrid tension headache by mid afternoon and even though she was here i told her i had to put my feet up and close my eyes and i promptly fell asleep. She was here till not long ago. Ifeel bad for her with her severe speech impediment but during the course of her visit she actually told me she felt better than she had in a very long time. .more energy, etc and was as relaxed being here as she had been in a long time. .glad one of us was. This all behind me now i have learned that with Mama's situation and my lack of energy i will not be doing that again. It was mind numbing. And mama does not understand her and it confuses her when my cousin yells at her thinking yelling mumbled words makes them more understandable. ..it doesn't.
Jude, be careful moving. I got to enjoy that about 9 months ago. ..did not like it.
My feet are now up for a bit as i have given mama her ensure and changed her. .ah, the glorious feeling of solitude. ..my kitty is still not home. I am very worried about her. ..
General comment not directed at anyone so don't anyone take offense please. I have never understood why cats are allowed to be outside roaming other peoples property. I like cats...to be on their own property so they don't stir up my allergies. It never fails, anywhere I move there is always problems with cats by my window. I am one that like to have my windows open for fresh air rather than use the air conditioner. When cats sit by my window it causes me problems. Not only does it cause allergy problems but they make noise and wake me up. Don't bother telling me to spray water or something because the damage is already done by disturbing my sleep. If I am going to spray something it would be much stronger than water. Honestly, I don't dislike them just allergic to them. I was in a pet shop one time looking at the pretty little kitty...I wanted to pick it up and hold it so much. I finally gave in and stroked its head just a wee little bit. Did I say it was so cute? My eyes were all watery from being so near the kitty and I had to drive home with one hand because I couldn't touch anything...I mean nothing...until I washed my hand. Oh, ya I drove a stick then too. It was worth it...such a cute baby kitty never forget it!
I can think of a few people that I would like to slap too.
Uhm, yes the water came back on, but it is slow and sputtering... hehe, I know I must have emptied our well. SORRY I didn't know. Seriously, I'd thought about it, asked the General Contractor who erected the pool would it cause an outage with the neighbors and he assured me it wouldn't. Oooops.
OH YES!!! I forgot to mention that psycho daughter in law of mine called me 4 times during the middle of the night... 1:30 a.m. actually.... why you ask? haha...
SHE IS PREGNANT AGAIN!
thump thump thump thump oh God... really?
Jude - those big wastebins are called dumpsters here in the states and I'm about to rent one myself this summer to clean out Dad's garage and get rid of the debris from tearing down the old shed, etc. The smallest ones are about $200 for a week, so it's been on the back burner for a while. They sure are nice, though, when it comes time to do a big cleanout.
Been working like a fiend all day long today, it feels like. Going to go to bed. Oh wait....I have to fold laundry first, since it's piled on my bed. Dang.
Do you mean that when my mum dies if I cry that would mean I have not been very good while she was alive etc? I thought I would ask before I said you talk bollocks because I don't want to sound unreasonable