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BTW - q 2hr is NOT something that can be done by one caregiver 24 x 7 x 365. Sometimes prescribers forget what's practical...
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The lack of hand sanitation is another thing I noticed in the nursing home, I should have added it to my list! I noticed a psw handling mom's dentures with bare hands then going on to another room without washing, also when mom was gagging and spitting up while choking the nurse also treated her with bare hands, freely wiping her mouth and handling the basin. She gave her hands the 5 second sanitizer treatment when she left the room, but since my mom was a short term stay she really had no idea what kind of germs could have been lurking in her saliva. When there is an "outbreak" declared they exclude all visitors when they should really spend more time looking internally.
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Another night and morning from h*ll. Poop running down her legs and all over her back from laying in the liftchair.Its never been worse.The Hospice nurse said her lungs are still nhalf full,even with the 3 breathing treatments a day.Today,she has an appointment with the ear doctor because Mother thinks he will magically make her hearing come back but a year ago,he told her it was gone.She has holes in her ear drums and they tried 3 different patches.but the last time nothing worked.Ofcourse I will take her to appease her but its just more work and heartbreak.Mothers 86th birthday is pretty soon on August 3 and I hope she makes it.Now back to my many chores.Hope you all are getting through your day good.
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Jude, I'm sure you find this whole thing frustrating to the max. Just how many times did you tell the home nurse/Dr that something was wrong with mom? Why is it they never believe you, the one person who knows mom best? It's a shame they do that, then again, it could be a gift they disregard your thoughts and you have to call 911. I did get a chuckle when you described how bad they were with washing hands.... LOL, ingest poo n pee hehe....you do have a wonderful way with words. Let's all pray that mom doesn't "catch" something from their lack of proper sanitary hygiene. smh

I have learned a lot about c diff from this thread. Before y'all started posting about it, I'd honestly never heard of it before. This is such a wonderful resourceful thread.

I have my psychologist appt this week. I'm curious as what her suggestion will be on decompressing the last 3 years of caring for both parent's and holding them while they passed away. Yeah, this should be interesting.
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Well I have been in to see Mum during the night it is an 8 minute journey - during the day about 90 minutes there and the same back if traffic is bad and today HAD to be one of those days. I was asked today buy a university researcher what I considered to be compassionate nursing. I told her the word breaks down for me - COMplete PASSION for the job Awareness of needs and Total Empathy for the patient...simples. I think she was impressed and she said she thought that was a good way of getting people to understand what it meant.

Mum is rallying - didn't we all know she would - She is showing true colours though. I don't want food I don't like food and Im not going to eat it so there. All she missed was poking her tongue out and she would have been the perfect 4 year old!

They consider her to be bed bound but she bloody isn't she just isn't prepared to do anything for herself. I can see in her face she isn't going to be compliant and lord help em tonight - I have suggested low bed and crash mats but whether they will listen or not is a different matter. Only time will tell
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Oh and just to be totally offensive to the PC brigade I said an excellent command of English wouldn't go amiss either.! oops
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Jude, I hope your Mom's doing better today, and you aren't stressing too much over the big move! Are you buying a new house? I hate moving! Poop pills, hey makes sense to me. Keep your sense of humor, like you I love to laugh to cover up my tears, it shows your a strong person in my book,. Take care! Stacey B
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Well, we ran into our first SNAFU with the NH last night. I arrived to visit mom to find a note on her table by her bed, saying she was on the patio. Ok, nothing new - they put residents out there upon request and check on them every 15 minutes - at least that was my understanding. Then I find Mom on the patio, chilled and scared, alone on the patio, and saying, "I don't like it when they leave me alone out here for so long!". Mind you, this is an elderly woman who cannot walk, cannot propel her wheelchair on her own, and basically is just stuck where ever the staff puts her. I checked with the CNA on duty, who told me she had tried to get Mom to wait to go out on the patio until I got there (I was running late), but she insisted she wanted to go out, and that she (the CNA) had been checking on her by looking out the window at her every 15 minutes or so. Mom had been out there for 45 minutes by herself, no one ever even popped their head out the door to see if she needed anything. She was just left sitting there. I *very politely* informed the CNA that this was NOT acceptable - that Mom could have been having breathing trouble, needed to go to the bathroom, was maybe feeling unwell, cold, wanted to come in, etc - how would the CNA have known that by just looking out the window?? I followed up with a report to the charge nurse this morning and made sure they knew I *never* want this happening again - she assured me it wouldn't, and that a notice would be put up so that all CNAs knew the rules about residents being on the patio.
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Like it isn't enough we are anxious without people being so bloody thoughtless that our worst fears seem to be coming to fruition....good for you Susan nip that sort of behaviour in the bud and keep a diary ...just in case there is a next time
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Ahh Katie, and Jeanette and Hope, I have been in both of your shoes in some degree or another, and all I tell you is that it does get better with time. I know that doesn't make any of it seem easier at the moment but eventually............ after going through the illnesses, death's and grieving of 3 of our parents, 11 years ago, and the continuing Caregiving of my FIL, and this saga continues,, but it will get better and you will be a better person for it, If it doesn't kill you first. God I hope that doesn't happen, as I too, hope to enjoy my life someday! But truly! I am thinking about you all, and hope and pray you all can stay strong through your pain, and that everything gets a little easier every day, and that your loved ones are doing better too!.
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Oh Hope No! I am So sorry that you aren't getting your respite relief, but totally understand you just wanting to buckle down and Love on your Mama! Those tests are so intense and hard on both your Mom and you, and it doesn't sound as if either of you could handle them right now. It never ends, and then it does, and then what you would give for just one more day with them. I miss my Mom so much it hurts my heart! Love Love Love on her, and you sound disappointed but so incredibly strong right now, but underneath you're scared, tired, and disappointed a little too. I think that you are an amazing daughter, an incredibly selfless human being, as so many of us are here. I am thinking of you and hoping and praying you continue to have the strength to carry on, but remember to take care of You! Stacey B
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Jude, I'm thinking of you today, as you go through this with your Mum, and mid-move to the new place, too! Goodness. Like you said, it's like life isn't stressful enough, we have people that are supposed to be caring for our loved ones screwing things up.
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Sheradale, Wow, so glad that you two were able to go out, and that you had such a lovely day! I can just see your Mom cruising the supermarket eying all the new products out there! How Fun!
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Whinnnnning, I am going to whine, because I cannot keep my mouth shut when I see breaches of the most basic medical protocols ignored by professionals or paraprofessionals in a medical office or facility. If I say something, they all have that blank stare, like they have never been taught. Maybe 3 people out of 100 are following just washing their hands, our lives and those of our loved ones are at stake. Irks me to no end. Wearing tape on my mouth! People hate to be confronted with the truth, ever! My husband says it is an upside down world.
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Luckylu, boy you are having it rough right now. I wish I could come to your side to help and to give you a break. Life is just not fair sometimes.
Jude, stay on those idiots who can't even manage the most basic hand washing techniques, where did they go to school, The University of Infections R Us? The old gal still has a little life left in her yet, if she's kicking up over the food, but really, I am praying she does feel better soon, and hope that you are able to get some rest and packing done between visitations, which does take so much out of the day, and is so exhausting, all you really want to do is catch up on some sleep.
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Jude I wish I was a fly on the wall in your Mum's room when you blast in with sticks of dynamite stuck in your ears and a lighter in your hand. bet all the nurses run and hide when they see you coming. Glad Mum is getting the IV antibiotics. Watch her feet to see they are not swelling form fluid overload. Judging by my experience with IV antibiotics I doubt she will be prepared to eat all the time she is in the hospital. he antibiotics play havoc with the good bacteria in her gut and the bad ones have a party. I would only eat turkey sandwiches, ginger ale and chocolate milk. You will have to build her up with the good probiotics once she is home again. I spent 2 weeks in hosp with the nasty brown stuff running down my legs and amused myself by noticing what rules were broken everytime a staff member came into my room.. One aid did everything right one night and I complimented her on her dillegence. The next morning she asked me if I had been a nurse. She was the first and only one to follow proper proceedure. As we all know Drs are above all that nonsense!!!!!
Jude hope they keep Mum for five days cause I can guarantee she won't finish that course of antibiotics at home, but you know where to put them.
Stay strong girl.
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My Mom seems to thrive on yearly and semi-annal doctor appointments. Now that she is 97, some of her specialty doctors are telling us she doesn't need to schedule a visit. If she isn't sick from whatever the specialty deals with, chances are slim she will die from those diseases.

I would think that would be good news. I know I would be doing cartwheels if someone told me no more GYN appointments and no more mammograms. But Mom worries, she still think she needs to see those doctors, old habits are hard to break.

The techs at the radiology will be glad not to see Mom... it takes two gals to help Mom with the mammograms. My gosh, at her age, why put yourself through that torture? It's difficult enough at my age.
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There is a trend published to have IV antibiotics administered at home. It is called 'hospital at home'. They send a nurse, they should also send an infection control nurse, familiar with asceptic techniques.
Jude, I know you could do this procedure yourself for your Mom, but please "don't try this at home". The reason is, you have enough to do, and you're going to need help, if only someone present if that is tolerable or helpful, so consider this.
Maybe this is the time to allow help, if they are profesional, and say you just cannot do that procedure. My neighbor (yes, another neighbor) missed a pleasant
visit from the nice, male I.V. nurse when she went to a hotel to hide from everyone
after discharge from the hospital.
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All these posts have my head spinning. The lack of protocol with my Mom at various times in the nursing home and then in the hospital were too numerous to mention.
If I start to think of it all I just get depressed and since we all know what the final outcome was already I guess theres no need to go there again.

Sorry so many of you are having such a bad time right now.

I stupidly went on the treadmill the other day. The going on the treadmill wasn't the stupid part. How long I stayed on was. I was so impressed with myself. But I've somehow pulled my groin muscle and I can barely walk now. IDIOT !! ME!!
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Gershen, you are trying so hard. Be sure to ice that injury. Do you ever see a chiropractor? Just getting out would maybe help. Be kind to yourself. Hey, I failed the stress test given by my doctor two years past now, just 1-2 minutes on that treadmill and I could not take it. You should have seen the look on their faces when I cried, stop, stop, it hurts, stop! The 1-2 minute duration was only because they weren't prepared. Then, the assistant was bebind me, trying to keep me on the moving treadmill so I would'nt fall. Not faking, but fibromyalgia.
Since you own a treadmill, you have used it before?
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Well tomorrow we leave for the river with 3 elders.. one frail, one with ALZ and one who is stubborn.. pray for me. I am also dealing with a sick cat ( the one who trashed our rec room 2 weeks ago) and luckily the friend who is watching them runs a cat rescue. We will be gone 3 days ( sort of) and I feel awful for her, but I can not get out of this! I just hope the cat is not too pathetic or she will run her to the vet, and I am not paying a huge bill for an elderly cat. She has a thyroid problem and I am not putting her through surgury at her age. Hubs of course is in total denial. I told friend that I will have hubs take cat to vet this weekend.. he can deal with the fall out and maybe he will then realize she is OLD! But if friend lets her out during the day so she can lay around with her feral BFF all is good. Wish me luck!
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Gershen, your presence here is appreciated, and duly noted. Good for you for reaching out.
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Freqflyer, funny how different people are. My mom now 91 said several yes ago no more mammograms. She always hated them and said I'm done if I get breast cancer at my age its time to go...
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Sendme2help, I know what you mean, drives me crazy no one washes their hands they think the hand sanitizer is all they need and they don't even use that all the time. I have a client in an adult foster home, when I go to see her I have to bring my own hand soap and paper towels to dry my hands. They have signs up in every bathroom " proper hand washing procedure" yet they have no soap and no paper towels makes me crazy. Then at my docs office i have to ask him to close the door before he talks to me...what happened to patient privacy! Whine whine
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Lol Sendme2help since I've been posting on here for a while now I would hope my presence has been duly noted :)
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Reading all your posts has made me smile in the wee small hours of the night when any sane person wold be sleeping - I actually got up to check on Mum then remembered she was in hospital DUH!

Your posts brought back a memory not too long ago when I knew I needed a gynae op. So off I trot to the docs. Now I used to live in a very mixed cultural area of a very large city in the UK and obviously that mix is replicated in the surgery. So I am sat in the waiting room with this delightful Smalian boy behind me when he decides to kick my chair rhythmically I admit but it was still bloody annoying. His father didn't stop him so I spoke to him nicely. He continued, nothing said by dad, this time I asked dad to ask the boy to stop and the man faced a lack of understanding (inner seethe starting) finally I ha enough and was not as quiet as one would expect (HAHAH) I told the boy what an ill mannered idiot he was at which point Dad suddenly developed very good English well he knew a lot of swear words! and started giving it large (don't know what you would call that in US but I mean remonstrating!). I don't think the women he dealt with ever spoke back but hell no I gave it back and then some at which point I was called into docs.
Now as you can imagine I am not a happy bunny, grim kid, grimmer father and now a new doc that I didn't much care for *on sight* and I have no idea why I just didn't like him.

In comes nurse with gynae tray, gloves gel speculum the works. He knocked the tray onto the floor. Then proceeded to pick it back up and place it back on the tray - erm hello you don't intend to use any of that on me do you - clearly he had had intentions of doing just that. I can feel the volcano rising within me as I insist on a new tray and that this one be condemned to the bin (they were those disposable speculums that they use these days)
Nurse is despatched to set up a new tray and meanwhile doc with gloves still on is taking notes and typing and I am sat there thinking he had so better change those gloves. Well nurse came back in doc went out with gloves on and a key in hand - he needed something he didn't have. Comes back in with gloved hands in pockets then proceeds to pick up the speculum - Nope volcano erupted. After asking him where he got his qualification and had he ever done basic infection control training I requested another doctor AND GOT ONE. Formal complaint immediately because he was putting patients at risk. Meeting called where it was explained to me that he was new to the practice...and that makes a difference ....why? how?

Well in his country.........don't even go there - there are zillions of doctors from other countries all of whom know and follow basic procedure - he has no business being in practice if he can't even follow these. Very disgruntled woman left surgery and never returned....well would you have done?
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When I confronted some caregivers about their lack of sanitation, I was told it is personal preference! What the h*ll! Personal Preference? No I don't think so! They have no gowns available? Oh that is personal preference! Not after I have spent hours and hours washing everything in bleach and water and throwing out some stuff! And I hope you aren't using personal preference in someone else's room and then coming back to MY MOTHER'S room! When I questioned why the people who brought her food didn't wear gloves, I was told they couldn't by law!?
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There have been three times in my life where I was getting a gynecological exam and inappropriate behavior was exhibited. I won't go into detail. Suffice it to say I left each time feeling like I had been sexually assaulted. Not physically. But mentally. I actually don't even know if there is such a thing but imagine being affronted as you walk by a construction sight. That sort of feeling.

I never ever reported it but I have often since felt I should of.

In answer to your question Sendmetohelp yes I used to go on the treadmill regularly. I stopped after my Mom died. Just didn't have the heart for it. But yes I am in fairly good shape. I've always taken care of myself that way.
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Sendme2help - the IV antibiotics at home trend has hit close here. My older sister has a very serious, life-threatening infection due to a recent surgery, and she simply can't overcome it. They are on the 2nd 6-week round of antibiotics now and are doing IV antibiotics at home, because her doctor feels her immune system wouldn't withstand a hospital stay - it's *that* serious - he feels she would end up picking up another infection in the hospital and it would be very dangerous for her. We're all just hoping she can fight this off and makes it through this.
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Susan, prayers for your sister this evening. Hospitals are getting so bad about infections now. I am starting to wonder if we should have operations at home. I hope that your sister recovers and feels better soon.
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