I'm tired of cooking/preparing 3 meals a day. It's just the two of us but boy oh boy can that woman eat!! She stays slimish, I get fattish. It's bad enough I do everything here much less start making her one thing and me the other. At times I feel guilty when I buy her fast food cuz of the nutritional value....not to mention I eat it too.
Yes I realize there is more hidden inside that I know of concerning my brother. He blames my dad for his shortcomings. I blame him. Even though I was much younger than they, I saw it all. They were typical teenagers siphoning gas, stealing pies and having fun. Dad didn't like it. Yes my dad was a mean SOB but he also gave us great life skills, not to mention every thing we wanted. This includes my two oldest brothers. They blamed dad for all the wrong and never appreciated all he gave to them. This is WHY it amazes me just how devoted they were to him, when his life was nearing it's end. Now, as a mother you now how we protect our kids, well.... they never gave mom the same respect. Guess they blamed her for something also.
CM, I want to tell them so much, Lord knows I do... once upon a time I was able to do just that, speak my mind. I am a Scorpio ya know ;), lately though, I find it so gut wrenching that I just can't even try with them anymore.
Hey!! I'd love to babysit pets.... I might look into that. However, cats are still a no no. My big pebble is just now accepting my own cat. It's been 1.5 years since I rescued Sydney. Best thing I EVER did.
Personally, I always felt they were too insensitive.
Always thought being sensitive was a great quality, so you keep being yourself lucky. Let those suffer their own guilt.
Brothers are weird too. I have three. One is deceased. One is schizophrenic. So I really would like to nurture the relationship with the one who is "normal" Not that I don't feel that my mentally ill brother is abnormal but his illness makes things difficult. But siblings have to meet each other half way.
I don't know..go figure..after getting my fanny blown out of the water tonight on FB I am just befuddled about life in general. I don't even know where all that ugliness and hatefulness came from . This man I don't know even told me that money was good, maybe one day I would have some...what does that even mean??? wth...people now are so rude and ignorant. another reason I just prefer Mama and my furkids...
Please don't take it personal, aren't those bad comments from "trolls"?
Aging Care has just updated their security on this site, hope that helps.
We all should just keep reminding ourselves it is public, and take the necessary precautions.
Drags darling daughter off to fabric shop with design in mind and yes I am now the proud owner of 3 x 2 metre lengths of the prettiest border anglais material.
It is scalloped along one edge (Great no need to hem then) with really pretty embroidery. So now I all set. A simple v necked fronted teeshirt type yoke and a curved edge back making it big enough to go over Mums head . Thats the top then all I have to do is sew a straight piece onto it with two pleats under the bust each side at the front and that cross over for modesty but open for ease of using the toilet at the back and voila she too will have easy to use nightwear.
So I spoke to Mum and told her the good news and what did she say? I don't know why you bother I might not be coming out. You know I want to die why did you waste my money on trash - I guess my reply wasn't very supportive but they say agree agree agree so I did - I said but you wasn't to look pretty when you die don't you? And bless her she said yes and then added that sounds like a nice nightie. Now I won't want her to wear the damned thing in case she dies when she puts it on!
The sibling thing has me so puzzled and I can't believe how so many people are having issues. I have no siblings, but my husband's spoiled, indulged sister who just moved in with his Mom is a real piece of work, has had all kinds of problems in her life that she brought on herself by bad behavior, has let herself go in health and appearance, and I wonder just how much she is doing for the MIL as she sleeps till noon, claims she is "ill" and finds excuses to go out all the time. Luckily for her MIL is still mobile, but she is getting more frail at 84. She and my husband are not close at all because she has always been spoiled and mainly because of her behavior. Another out of state friend has her brother fighting with her about their Mom's care and they don't even speak anymore. It seems to me that the siblings often add to the stress instead of rallying together in a crises like this and helping.
We all have so many problems to solve and challenges daily that we don't need stress from outside sources, be it siblings, or business, work, home health aides, nursing home personnel, etc! Other problems don't seem to stop when the caregiving one starts and some days I feel bombarded with other things on top of this. I really don't like waking up each morning and groaning, realizing what life has become and all it's problems and it seems I will never really be happy again as I once seemed to be. Or maybe I was just naive and clueless as to how things could get... Well, time to start my day and I am putting on my helmet to do so.
CM, read the height challenged pony story LOL, what a cutie pie and how nice of them to make that contraptionscope ;) HEY, the just had a segment on the news about how American comfort foods like BBQ, shrimp n grits and apparently all our fatty delicious foods are taking over London!!
Jude, just how do you have the time and energy to sew gowns?
I was just outside watering, which is my zen thing to do. Standing there, thinking about you and your mom heading to hospice house today, seeing the sparkle in her eyes, it HIT me. I remembered dreaming of my own mother last night, laughing with someone whom was going to watch her, telling her to watch out for her eyes to start sparkling with mischief and don't be offended if she calls her an a**. Then mom laughed and said that was her "pet" word .... ohhhh, I do believe this is the first time I have dreamed of her. It was lovely seeing her again.... sniff
I hate seeing my Mother like shes been the past week especially.
I wonder why older people become so obsessed with going to the bathroomOur recipe of senna,miralax and suppositories was working and all the sudden stopped.Oh,the bathaid is here.
Jeanette its easy I don't sleep more than 4 hours a day
I am wasted at the moment though all this thing and froing to hospital meetings with consultants in all sorts of things and then solicitors, shopping for furniture that will fit selling furniture that won't fit has me up the wall and is still driving me there.
Good and bad day today Mum looks much better - mums temper is much worse
Dad died 17 years ago this very morning so she has had a bad night and don't we all know it - like we don't remember him at all!!! not much - he was and always will be my guiding light
I hadn't been on the ward 2 minutes when she said the nurses haven't washed me they told me to wash myself. Hmmm if I find out that is true that nurse will be looking for a new job but I hold my tongue. Don't worry says I - I will do that right away for you.
Not your job - well I am making it my job - might as well you do nothing else. No I know mum - I just cant be bothered to argue. So off I trot to find gowns towels cloths cream lotions and potions - the nurses are brilliant - found everything for me pads, knickers - the lot and then offered to help - I said listen she's grumpy already let me do it - you have a break. The nurse said I can't imagine she wasn't washed but I have only just come on duty - I can't either but I am not going to START an argument - especially one we can't win. Anyway the nurse came in to help me and mother started the rant - her it was her said I could wash myself - lazy she is doesn't want to work - she's just like you are. Fine pair you make. Eyes caught eyes over her head and we just smiled conspiratorially. We washed Mum I creamed her body as per usual and the nurse looked at me as if I was mad - stops her skin sheering - prevention is better than cure hun.
At that point the consultant calls for me and daughter so off we go. he was really nice Mums raised liver count could be liver damage they don't know yet or the extent or if it is the big C visiting its a wait and see. He has noticed she has gone downhill from her last stay and said it will go in steps now - we don't know enough about any dementia to make confirmed prognoses but we do know enough about your Mum to be able to see how hers is progressing. He explained how prolonged antidepressants cause hyponatremia (spelling is probably wrong) and affect the liver adversely - yet without them she is suicidal. We discussed alternatives but they are limited - apparently they all have that effect.
Back to ward and she is ranting to anyone that will listen that she needs to have a wash. Time to go home methinks
After last night getting my rear chewed on for a while I am still feeling like I have been beaten up so I feel kind of wacko.....I know you all think I'm ridiculous to let someone whom I do not know affect me simply by saying those horrid words...but the words he used are ones I never thought anyone would call me and all because he and I just had different opinions...and he reported me so I couldn't even respond for a while because my page got locked, but he continued to bash me via pm and so by the time I was able to respond I couldn't. I know, I know, I wear my heart on my sleeve, but dog gone it ...that hurt...
The house is already too quiet...As tiny as Mama is she has always been such a huge presence in our family..her absence is so vastly missed when she is not here....I sent all her stuff with them and I will go later and just make sure she is nice and tucked away and take one of her little comforters so she'll be nice and cozy. I love you all and I truly mean that....I know I would be lost without this group of folks....
I used to go to FB to feel like I belonged somewhere...Not only do I NOT want to go on there now, I am thinking of just copying all my pictures onto a disc and deleting my account altogether...who needs that aggravation.
Again, thank you all for your encouraging words ....If I could reach out there and hug you all I would do it...virtual hugs to all!!!! now ...what to do with me for a few days....the funny thing is...all I want to do is go to sleep....
Jeanette, thanks for your willingness to go to bat for me...I finally just deleted that post, not because I changed my mind, but because I just don't need any more cursing and name calling on MY page when I said nothing offensive to anyone...other than believing we need to be respectful to law enforcement...