Follow
Share
Read More
Find Care & Housing
My whine today is that my mom called and wanted me to go into town (several miles each way) and make her a sandwich. She said she could go to the bathroom and go to the door to let me in, but could not stand at the sink and do that. I hadn't even fed the horses yet, and really didn't want to go to town, so I reminded her that one of her helpers in the building could come, or she could nuke a hot pocket, and that she could push her rollator in with her and sit on it if her legs got weak. It wasn't that she wanted to see me; I was just there Tuesday, so now she's irked with me, and I'm fighting off guilt. Actually, it scared me; sounded like a dementia thing, because I had to tell her what to do, though she always blames any confusion, or forgetfulness on her drugs. So I called her just now and she DID call someone in the building to come make her a sandwich; oh well....
(1)
Report

Mally, that's what happens some times, our parent still view us as being teenagers with no responsibilities. I even tried to wave my Medicare card and AARP membership card to convince my parents that I was also a senior citizen, like they were but without the cane.
(2)
Report

This keeps up, I'll be waving the cane, too...  Does this mean I'm not a monster, FF?
(2)
Report

I just want some privacy. Mom's up and still going strong. I posted a thread about it earlier. More or less was just needing to vent so I didn't snap at anyone. Mom isn't an ALZ patient that we know of (paranoid schizophrenia and possibly Parkinson's) but she does the shadowing thing. All. Day. Long. I probably sound like a broken record on here, but I am relatively new to this and every day feels like Groundhog Day.
(8)
Report

Sundowners?
(1)
Report

I read your earlier post. Your mother’s behaviors must be very difficult for you. Is there a day program for schizophrenics that she could attend.

How old is your mother? Does she see a psychiatrist for her schizophrenia? Take meds? Perhaps it is time for a medication adjustment or the addition of a new medication. As schizophrenics age they sometimes need med changes.

I’m sure that her intrusiveness is difficult to endure. It might be helpful for her to have behavior modification therapy. Perhaps your county mental health agency would have a respite program. You need to arrange some time for yourself. The stress of her behavior is not healthy for you. Please take care of yourself. Come back and vent anytime.
(5)
Report

Mom is 56. She takes anxiety medication and Cogentin for muscle spasms for Parkinson like symptoms. She does have monthly psychiatrist visits.

Her neurologist took her off of her antipsychotics for six months, as he said that is the only way to know for sure if she does have true Parkinsons or if it's medication induced.

I am her legal guardian, and we moved her in with us for now, but am looking into home care or AL for long term care.

Thanks for suggesting the mental health agency. I hadn't thought of them, but that's another good resource that I can check into to see what types of assistance they offer.
(2)
Report

Sis was here and spent the night because she had some business that needed to be attended to. For once I kept my mouth shut and didn't even mention visiting mom, although I went myself as usual. She came, she went - and she didn't even go over to give mom a five minute visit and peck on the cheek. We talked about mom as we sat in my living room, but it was all kind of abstract, the way you would talk about someone who had already died. But she is only 5 minutes away. I think my "normal" family is much more dysfunctional than I ever realized.
(12)
Report

Frazzled, Sounds like she is getting the treatment she needs. I hope the county mental health agency can provide you with additional resources.
(2)
Report

Learned today I'm getting an extra day a week at work! Great, an even stronger paycheque!

Also learned today our house is shedding shingles like a tree in fall...bye bye paycheque :'(
(6)
Report

Cwillie
I'm always amazed by my siblings apathetic attitude

Frick texts and asks if I have reservations at the track for the Kentucky derby - but hasn't asked about mom in ions

Frack texts and asks if she knows me - when I say yes but she still asks for her sister and niece - she says doesn't she remember they're dead ?

I'm searching for an appropriate response
(3)
Report

Maybe something like "Mother remembers Love and being Loved" or "A hug would mean the world to her" or "Do you remember every single thing?,You know she's been very ill with sepsis and it affected her mind alittle" or "She just thinks you're dead since she hasn't seen you in SOooo long"......I'm still thinking MsMadge,but knowing you,you'll come up with just the right thing.....
(4)
Report

Happy Mother's Day to all those
"aunties" out there:
These I know: Luckylu, Gershun, MsMadge, CWillie!

There are others....
(1)
Report

Is Mother’s Day tomorrow?
(0)
Report

Next week Becky, the 13th.
(1)
Report

Advance planning, because my internet is out every three minutes, and I just cannot take it anymore.

For you, Becky....
The way you cook for everyone, every day is Mother's Day. So happy Mother's Day, in advance, to you too!
(3)
Report

I never know. My ex always said I wasn’t his mother. My son kind of remembers - just that it’s in May.
(0)
Report

Send- I feel left out. I am an "auntie too" :)
(3)
Report

smeshque...Happy Mother's Day to you too~
And Send,Don't forget yourself.You are an Auntie too~
I am a Kitten MaMa and a Cat MaMa and a Dog MaMa,but they don't give cards or gifts,just Lots of Love & litterboxes:(
(4)
Report

Lu- Happy Mommas Day to you. I always heard that those things they leave in the litterbox are presents.? :) If your babies could earn money and get to a shop, they would definitely buy their Momma the greatest gifts.
(1)
Report

Smeshque,
You were included in my Mother's Day greeting when I said: "There are others".
I am glad you posted your auntie status so we can get to know you better.

Now that I think about it, Bookluvr was also included.

There might be too many to mention by name. Too many mothers, too many aunties, too many pet-Moms. That is why the greeting card companies get the big bucks.
(4)
Report

Today is "No Diet Day". Celebrate, everyone!

It is also Lemonade Day and No Homework Day and many others. Enjoy whatever day you want to have.
(4)
Report

Cats bring a dead mouse, lay it at your feet for a gift.

Happy lemonade day!
(2)
Report

Gershun,
Reading a ways back, your non-profit idea is good. I was required to leave so much financial information to apply for help, they could just go to a box in storage, take my file, and have all they need to commit identity theft. Accessible, way far too accessible, but I had to risk it. Nothing left of privacy now. Sad. No dignity either.
(3)
Report

Gershun I love that idea haha, reminds me of how shaken some doctors are whenever I record audio of my dad's appointments on my phone "for his future reference". I find it really improves the quality of care!

So maybe not just burly support hunks but also dainty secretary support staff!
(3)
Report

Wow reading all these makes me feel a little better. I have been feeling bad thinking I just was the only one whining
(2)
Report

OneLastStraw,
Everybody needs an advocate.
How about recording, with permission of course, the things said to caregivers over the years of caregiving......one could write a book!
(3)
Report

Marys56,
You are not the only one.  Did you see that?  My last posted twice, lol.
So even though I don't know you, I am re-purposing this space to say hello!

Wait up......I am not sure you get credit for whining unless you post it!
I went back 4 pages, and could not find a single whine out of you.

Do you have a whine tonight?
(1)
Report

Thanks Send happy Mothers day to you also.
(1)
Report

I did three of my favorite little things today
Starbucks for a cafe latte
See's for a free sample
OSH to browse in the garden center -
very disappointed they no longer carry Joy liquid dish soap though - I hate Dawn and Ajax
(2)
Report

Start a Discussion
Subscribe to
Our Newsletter