I'm tired of cooking/preparing 3 meals a day. It's just the two of us but boy oh boy can that woman eat!! She stays slimish, I get fattish. It's bad enough I do everything here much less start making her one thing and me the other. At times I feel guilty when I buy her fast food cuz of the nutritional value....not to mention I eat it too.
Sorry about the fall. Hope you will feel better as quickly as possible. Hugs! Sounds like you’ve been through the mill. So sorry. Hang in there!
You’re a tough cookie!
I learn from being in therapy that when parents enable a child it has nothing to do with the child--it has everything to do with the parents--it makes them feel better.
Just today my mother found out that my brother is moving to another section 8 apartment and she is so upset, disspite that she is not doing well, she is upset because she doesn't want him to move and feels like he is making a mistake. She is mad because she has no say in the matter. Not saying this is anything like with your parents and brother. But anyways, I had to tell her it is his mistake and you can't control him anymore. For the love of God, he is 52 yrs old let him make a decision for once in his life. And of course, she has to because she has no way of stopping him and I am not going to. Not my job!
I think your parents enable your brother because it make them feel better.
And yes it sucks getting old because when we fall, we just didn't bounce back like we use to:(
I never thought about the alcoholism clouding his judgement that way and making him unable to see her real condition. I do believe he thinks he’ll be provided for for the rest of his life even after they are gone but that has to be in part because he’s generally clueless about how life works and what the cost of living is!
Like you, my brother and I was taught you have to work to get what you need and want, however as my mother gave my brother more and more he became entitle. The same thing probably happen with your brother. And our brothers never can hold on to money because they don't value or respect it!
I get it. My brother was hooked on heroin at 13. It breaks my heart. That long ago, parents didn’t think to speak to children about drugs. No drug education in schools either. Not excusing, just stating facts.
He fell in with a kid at school, (a wealthy kid) that wanted to try it and talked my brother into it. They both became hooked. It’s not just ghetto areas where drugs are taken, like people used to think. My neighborhood was a nice upper middle class area.
My point is some parents just don’t know how to understand the situation. First and foremost they love their kids. They come from a hush hush era and have no frame of reference. They made mistakes. All parents make mistakes just like all kids do. I hated my parents at one time because of feeling invisible to them. My brother took all of their attention. When I got older I could see how difficult it was for them.
Thank God, people are more open about discussing topics now. There were no support groups for us in that day.
There was shame involved. Truth be told, it’s a disease. A very tough disease. We have to remove the shame so people will feel incentive to get help and their families get the support they need.
It takes the majority of people several rehab attempts to become clean. My brother is dead now too. I forgave him. Yes, it’s hard but it became harder for me to stay angry and not forgive. It’s a complicated situation. I see all sides. Just telling how I feel. No one has to agree.
It’s horrible for everyone involved and some unfortunately some never figure it out. It is a tragedy.
Yes, that can easily happen. I understand that can occur. Sometimes there is unhealthy competition within families. There is denial too. Not always on purpose. Sometimes it is in order to emotionally survive.
I wish that you and I could meet for a gourmet dinner somewhere! If anyone deserves it we do! I cook every single day! I know you do a lot for your aunt. I have done more than my share for mom. Hell, we deserve to go on a luxury cruise after all of this, watch the waves in the ocean, the blue sky during the day, the stars at night, etc, etc, etc. be waited on hand and foot! An all expenses paid trip! I’m dreaming of it. Are you? Hahaha
have you tried layering two or three Chux ? Not the disposable ones, but the washable ones? You can find them on Amazon
if mom wets through the top one even during a diaper change then it can be rolled up and replaced with a new one while the sheets are still protected
you will still have laundry but nowhere near as badly as changing sheets in the middle of the night
I don't necessarily need total luxury, just a ferry will do as long as there is blue sky & sea :)
I met 2 longtime caregivers recently (worked alt shifts). When the very elderly elder they were caring for was made palliative after surgery for a very nasty broken leg, they booked their cruise (or was it a tropical island escape?) Elder was hardly verbal, hardly eating, unable to move for weeks... but then survived - but would be bedbound til the end of days. That cruise was keeping them going for sure.
Start collecting brochures & sticking them inside your cupboards (like Shirley Valentine).
Yes, I was just dreaming BIG! Hey, I will jump on that ferry with you, if you don’t mind. I like the way you think. Love your response!
Hahaha. No! Don’t even think that! A senior cruise? Hell, NO!
I’ve never even been on a cruise. Travelled, yes but never got around to a cruise. I was just thinking it would be lovely to have everything planned, nothing to decide or alter, just pure relaxation! Well, deciding what cocktails to order would be fun!
Oh world :(
The sheriff’s department & highway patrol will ask residents to check their cameras. I hope the residents there have them. It sounds like ring doorbell cameras are popular there. They say the suspect was probably driving an 80s or 90s model GMC SUV, van or truck. But that’s about all they know right now.
But what a wicked thing to have done. I hope they catch him.
That is horrible and sad! Good grief what is this world coming to?! 😥
Well they have a suspect vehicle! Video footage of a late 80s to early 90s blue Chevy suburban is what it looks like to me. Driving past the little shopping center across from my parents subdivision.
shell I know right? Just awful. I wish I could say it’s rare that these things happen but they happen all the time in this world :(
People have been poisoning dogs at local parks here. Leaving meat products around for unsuspecting dogs to eat.
I'm seriously starting to think everyone is losing their mind. I look at people now differently. Some guy at one of our local malls was going around sticking people with a hypodermic needle. Twice recently someone has been driving the wrong way down a one way street and killed pedestrians on the sidewalk.
If I went on a cruise I'd probably catch the Norwalk virus.
Oh and today I went for an eye exam and he says I am a glaucoma suspect cause I have higher eye pressure readings and one of my optic nerves is odd.
I was told this 5 years ago too and was panicking everyday but it turned out that I have thicker corneas so that's why my readings were high and I was probably born with my optic nerve this way so I'm not going to let myself go down the panic road (YET)
I'm scheduled for a visual field test and eye mapping etc. just to get a baseline of my eyes.
Should I start wearing full armor when I go out?
poor coworker collapsed while getting lunch this week
bldg security performed cpr til medics arrived -
if it was me not sure I’d want Cpr
- he’s in icu and sedated
Worried, That is great news!
Smart Bishop! So very true!
I find past generations were more independent because we interacted more in society. Of course there are pluses to technology. We are not going back now. Those days are gone forever. My husband makes his living in the tech field. My house always has some device in the developmental stage that he is developing or testing for the market.
When I am bored I like to freak mom out by telling Alexa to beam me up and she plays the Star Trek theme. Hahaha. I can’t take the chronic anxiety with her of the time so to break the monotony I suppose I am a bit naughty at times. Hahaha. I also freak her out with a few other hi tech things that I learned from hubby. 😂