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Grandson with COVID on the mend. DD still has a very sore throat and fatigue.

In holiday hilarity, my ex posted to the family thread "Barb has shingles". My middle daughter, who will be here later with her family for a seder, near had a panic attack. Nope, he substituted my name for his wife's. Miserable to have shingles, especially on a holiday weekend when you are travelling.
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Barb,
Is her name Barb too? 🤣🤭

🐤🐤🐤🐤🐤🐤🐤🐤🐤🐤🐤🐤🐤🐤🐤🐤🐤🐤🐤🐤🐤🐤🐤🐤🐤🐤🐤🐤
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Some days, like today, I just don't feel like being a caregiver.

I don't want to "check in" with mom or make her meals. She can't ever remember if she has eaten.

I don't want to yell so loud so she can hear me, I don't want to repeat myself nor hear repeats of her questions. I don't want to smile all the time and pretend that's it not hard having her here even when she says she can't be "too much trouble."

I am emotionally exhausted and burned out. Lord help me make it through this period of my life...

OK. My whine is done. Thanks for listening!
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Today I feel like I've had it with incontinence. Mom's constant removing of her pullups is so annoying. I go to so much trouble to keep her clean, dry, and warm, for her to just take off her pullups and tell me it's so much easier just to pee in her pants and let the stack of clean laundry (she put on the sofa to sit on) soak it up.

There! Thanks for "listening"
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That definitely is worth whining about Natasha!

AsianDaughter - I remember how exhausting it is to constantly have to shout to be heard, and it's hard not to sound like a shrieking harpy even when you aren't feeling that way!
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For anyone wondering, the winds are still blowing! Two weeks of this nonsense! Weather pros are saying we are getting winds because the storms are staying north of here. And we really need moisture! Red flag days daily and there are several fires in the state.
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I know that can be a task cooking all day but I did get a good laugh from your comment sounds like you are a good person I wish I had someone to cook for me, keep up the good work 🙏
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How sad to read somewhere to night of a mother who refused her daughter's sincere offer to help with her dad's care in light of her mother's own poor health. The mother told her daughter to leave her alone. Shortly, the mom was dead. Her dear daughter views her mother as a saint. I'm sorry for I will never be that kind of saint. I don't think I will ever be a saint. I know myself too well. If I ever need help in taking care of my wife and someone offers to help me, I will accept their help. The saints of old were martyrs because of what others did in response to their faith. They didn't make themselves a martyr. I don't believe in people making a martyr of themeselves. If help is offered, then take the help and live. :(
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NoTryDoYoda, yes, if people offer to help it should be accepted. When I offer help to people in distress I always add that I *mean* it, otherwise I wouldn't offer it -- it is not putting me out or burdening me, in fact I would be distressed to find out that their situation become worse because they didn't take me up on my offer. There are many people who are willing, able and happy to help. It blesses their lives as well.
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I went today to buy some things for updating the river house.. ended up in Boscov's to get curtains for 2 bedrooms. I have always found nice reasonably priced curtains there. Not today,, if I could find a topper, no drapes.. you know the drill. And they had only 1 salesperson for the entire top floor! So I never got my curtains. Guess I'll look an Amazon? To make the day really special,, as I was leaving a nice "older than me" gentleman told me it was sleeting,, indeed it was. And in the 80s just a day or so ago. It;s just messy here at my house but at friends 10 miles away further up the mountian the yard is covered in snow. I'm over it!
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Well hubs and went to walmart today and I found 2 great sets of curtains for way less than Boscov,, it they had them.. LOL But I had to go with hubs,, nuff said! But we did get some great deals for my $109 LOL He wanders around and I end up saying "if you want it put it in the cart " But at least he drives,, I hate the dang parking lot there, no matter what time we go
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Pamzi, yea!

A bargain and finding what you like, works every time.
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My husband has been agitated for a few days, as well as jumbled sentances and angry out bursts. I'm soooo tired of this. I'm trying to respond and not react, to redirect to other topics, than his incomprehensible rants about financial advisors or pooping. Yep. Quite the mental whiplash going on.
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My whine moment. Enormous stress right now. Trouble with the caregivers: they might have done something very bad with my mother's phone (I'll soon find out). IT man still working on it. The private caregivers behaved extremely well for months. We knew it could be, too good to be true.

I write this also to warn others. It's very hard to find good, honest caregivers (whether private or agency) (even with good references, driver's licence, etc.). The more smoothly that all works, the more smoothly your own life will go.
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Just updating. I hope everyone is doing all right!

The IT man fixed the problem -- turns out, the caregivers didn't do anything. It was a weird thing the iphone did by itself, after an automatic software update (the iphone suddenly created a passcode, even though we never had a passcode). However, the caregivers have done other bad things, and I'll look for alternatives. Have a great day, everyone!
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My phone's texting is not working. Evidently a wide Verizon problem. And of course, I just received documents that I have been waiting for the past three months. I need to login to a site that does double factor id through text message. Guess I will try again tomorrow.
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Glad: So are you not able to toggle when the text msg comes in?
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Text is not working at all.

Trying to access docs on laptop, waiting for code via text to my phone which doesn't come through.

Notice that docs are there came through email.
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Hi Glad, hope you’re OK! You probably already tried: turn off/on mobile, then see if text message works again. Also in settings, turn on preview notification for text message: if that works, you might be able to see the content of the message before it arrives in the message inbox.
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Thanks for the tips V! I have and just noticed that there is a notice on the phone that says emergency calls only. Never saw that before.
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Hi Glad! Very annoying - I really hope it gets solved soon.

The same thing happened to me yesterday (my mother’s phone). It was caused by an automatic OS update for iphones.

First the phone suddenly created a passcode (we never have a passcode). (This part, wasn’t happening to your phone, Glad).

We also got a screen with “emergency calls only” + passcode required. We were locked out of the phone.

The IT man came. I don’t know exactly how he solved it. But he needed the apple ID, then he removed the SIM card, put it back in, then he tried a passcode (he was lucky and it was right). Then the phone was back to normal. He deleted the passcode, so my mother has easy access to her phone.
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Hi Glad! I hope your phone problem is being solved!

New update: it turns out my mother herself put the passcode! We (the IT friend and I never imagined my mother would be able to do it). I told her today, we know she couldn't have done it. Suddenly she said, she did it, and indeed she knew the passcode. It didn't occur to her to tell us she did it, because she didn't realize that was the problem we tried to fix yesterday with her phone. And I never would have imagined she knows how to put a passcode.

So the mystery has been solved. It wasn't an iphone glitch. It was my mother who suddenly put a passcode, after the iphone software update.
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Verizon problem was with the fiber network with affects throughout the country. The text message with the code finally came through about 12:30 a.m.
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Great, Glad!!
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Wishing all of you, well!

I challenge myself henceforth to stop whining (at least for 7 days straight), starting from 22 April ’22.

I challenge myself to make the same Herculean effort towards myself, as I did for my mother. No excuses.
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Yes, the winds are still blowing. At work there is a bit of a break. But, at home, there is not. Tomorrow, a critical level wind warning, it is so dry, and not even work area gets out of this one!

Starting tomorrow about 11 a.m. and continuing into the night. gusts to 65 mph! It has to stop sometime, right? The level of dust gets so bad you cannot see past the houses across the street. One neighbor is in the process of moving to Wyoming where it is even worse, more often. Wonder if he is sorry yet!
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Now they are saying winds to 75 mph today with temp up to 85 F. We have had so many fires already! Driving home yesterday the air was so hazy, dust in the air from the winds we have had.

A couple of days ago a fire was started by the battery of a crashed drone.
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OK, here I am...Oh boy...
So my challenge was supposed to start today (22 April '22):
(1) Stop whining for at least 7 days. (2) No excuses; help myself as much as I helped my mother.

I ended up yelling (I normally never yell) while speaking to my mother today. But not at her (she knows that). But at the situation, the stress, the pressure. She (for once) spoke very calmly to me, really understood and empathized, felt the worry I have for my life.

I really needed to express what I said. So I'm glad I did it.

I hope all of you are well. Please everyone, me too, I'm trying to find the right balance: in my situation, I must tip the scales more towards me, more help towards my life. Wishing us all luck!!!!!
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Sewer back up issues. This time I need a plumber and a restore company. Fortunately it's confined to part of the laundry room. I started an insurance claim. One bonus of the condo is that I will not have to deal with basement issues of any kind. Looking forward to that!

Not much will have to be tossed - the small freezer, some shelving and a few bits of baseboard and ceiling tile I had stored down there. The wooden base the washer and drier sat on will have to go. Not sure what else.

The plumber is still down there and the clean up crew will come when they are finished what they are doing elsewhere.

I really didn't need another insurance claim to deal with. I think it is the same adjuster we had for the post evac stuff and she was awful. Oh well.

On top of this R now has covid and is feeling pretty rotten, so he won't be up to work on the house for a while. I had already decided that we would not get it on the market for May 1, so aiming at June 1 now. It will happen when it will happen In guess.
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OH NO, Golden! I am so sorry, what a pain to have to deal with!
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