I'm tired of cooking/preparing 3 meals a day. It's just the two of us but boy oh boy can that woman eat!! She stays slimish, I get fattish. It's bad enough I do everything here much less start making her one thing and me the other. At times I feel guilty when I buy her fast food cuz of the nutritional value....not to mention I eat it too.
Mom's memory is pretty bad today. She's forgotten how to leave a message on an answering machine (looking at me blankly with the phone in her hand when my sister's voice mail picked up, saying, "It's (sis)....what do I do?" - as though someone were on the other end talking to her, when in fact, it was my sister's voice mail greeting playing. It completely confused her. She's asked me what day it is several times. When talking to my sister on the phone (she called back), Mom tried to tell her how we got stuck in the woods on our vacation while trying to get to the lake - and she left out several important details - so I'm pretty sure older sis now thinks I took Mom out to the woods to dump her off and leave her. (That one was actually pretty humorous to listen to from this end of the conversation...) She's neglected going to the bathroom to the point of having accidents, so I've started reminding her again, which she hates. She gets irritated at me when I do that.
These days are not coming all that close together right now, but when they do, it's very disconcerting. Looks very much like the early stages of age-related dementia, and also very much like what happened with my grandmother (Mom's mother). She was fine living alone, going out with "her ladies" for lunch, and doing all her own housework and driving. Then slowly, things started slipping. First it was the driving (Mom's not driving anymore now), then it was the toilet habits (again, Mom's already there), and then it was the memory - not remembering her pills or forgetting to get dressed, etc. (Mom is definitely entering that territory). I hate this.
We have another trip coming up soon. I need to visit my youngest son, whom I only get to see once a year, because his father won't make the trip to bring him to see me, nor will he let me have him for the summer (he blames me for our older ADULT son's bad choices in life, and thinks I will "let" our youngest get into trouble if he's up here with me...gee...thanks for making me feel like parent of the year, buddy...). Because I can't rely on anyone else to check on Mom or stay here with her, and I can't leave her alone, she has to go with me. That means 11+ hours of driving with stops to get mom out of the van, onto her scooter or into her wheelchair to make restroom stops (hoping she doesn't have an accident requiring a clothing change), get the dog out for his potty break, then back on the road....staying in a more expensive vacation rental than originally planned so that it's easier for her to navigate and has a shower instead of a tub...and taking her everywhere with me down there.
I'm glad she's going with me, and that she'll get to see my son - because who knows if she will ever get to make this trip again. Next year could bring all sorts of things, given her current situation. I hope she'll still be in good enough shape to make the trip again, but ....?? I'm SO worried about this trip...
Mom turned 74 today. As hard as this part of her life is to watch, and as hard as it is on me, I hope she sees 75...and longer.
How old is she? does she have any other health issues apart from ALs?
I would love to see that "HULA".
Yes its times like this you really feel you are on your own! My other bro rang as usual thankgod at least he gives a crap!
She's always been this way. Always. Dementia is just making it worse. If there was a way to divorce an in-law, I'd do it in a second and never talk to her again. Then I'd throw myself a big party and do a hula dance to celebrate.
Oh dear cant cope with this now as hoilday next week and ive never been away from him that long but my sis is here and shes been warned to look after him OR else.
Breaks your heart when your little pet is in pain!! id probably be a basket case if i was a mother!!! but hes my baby!!
If you can *see* the stinger sticking out, take something with a flat edge, like a credit card, and gently scrape across the top of the sting to try and get the stinger out - DO NOT squeeze the site of the sting or the stinger itself - you will inject more venom into the wound.
I have teatree oil wipes that i cleaned his head with? its a bump that seems swollen so a bit worried?
I know if its a person you could take the sting out? any animal experts there like Ashlynne?
We are all here for you and i know its time for me to move on with this i cannot live like this im miserable and NO mum would never want that for me.
Hugs this will be hard for us all but its the right thing to do for all concerned i dont want to end up resenting mum because even a 47 i feel my life is over sometimes.
I am so excited about Spain next week but nervous aswell as one sniff of freedom will just make me more determined when i get back to have my life back again i have to get back to being me ive lost a bit of weight but its not easy when theres nothing to look forward to at the weekends i need to get out more and get fit but comfort eating is a big part of this job if youve no other outlets!
Hugs we will be with you every step!! God sounds awful but its like inmates keeping in touch when they "get out" of jail!!
Sliced pre-made pound cake layered in a long casserole dish
Top sliced cake with crushed berries (crush earlier in the day and add a bit of sugar or sweetener to bring out the juice - it soaks into the cake - yum!)
Top berries with Cool Whip or other whipped topping
Slice whole strawberries in half lengthwise and lay them in rows across the top of the cake like flag stripes. Add blueberries in the upper left corner as the "blue field with stars" (the bit of white whipped topping showing through the blueberries looks like stars).
It's always a hit. No baking, no huge mess to clean up. Make it a few hours ahead of your event to allow the flavors to blend.