I'm tired of cooking/preparing 3 meals a day. It's just the two of us but boy oh boy can that woman eat!! She stays slimish, I get fattish. It's bad enough I do everything here much less start making her one thing and me the other. At times I feel guilty when I buy her fast food cuz of the nutritional value....not to mention I eat it too.
For someone who works full time and does the "dirty" work of changing pampers by herself, I am soooo tired of cleaning the darn toilet bowl! I can clean it today, and then when I come home for lunch the next day, someone (not dad) did #2 and did not flush twice so that all of it goes away. Now poop is stuck on the bowl that's above the water level. A few days of trying to not to clean the bowl (hoping sis would do it since I didn't make that mess), I cave in. I come home the next day at the end of work, and...the toilet bowl is back with the poop stuck on the sides. Tonight, I'm cleaning the toilet again.
Why?!?! Why do grown ups (including my nieces and their spouses) do not flush twice to get the poop off the wall? If that doesn't work, there's like 2 plastic sponge bath tubs and 2 tupperware bowls that can be used to "help" rinse the poop down when you flush it the 3rd time. Am I the only one in this family who gets grossed out over seeing poop on the side walls of the toilet bowl????
That alone gives me the heebiejeebies about Seriquel ... I read up about in on AC. :( i can pick it up tomorrow.. we shall see.
I am not happy about this. It's just the "Sundowners" and the occasional outburst. Really... Im not sure about drugging her up. Crud!
Oh the tricks they played on each other...holy cow.
Unfortunately (in more ways than one..heheh) the distance would probably be too far for it to work. We're about 1/4 mile from her with woods in between houses. Plus she has no internet/wifi service, nor can she afford it. A great idea though!
I've thought more than once about how helpful it would be to have some kind of video suveillance system setup - like a nanny cam. But aside from grappling with the moral/ethical reservations I have over "spying" on her, the cost of setting something like that up would probably be prohibitive. *sigh*
The "evil" side of me, however, does find the entertainment potential intriguing......
You can open your garage door, turn lights on, tv, water etc... all from wherever in the world you are to your house. Hmmm.... it might just be something to look into... for several reasons ;)
Could be helpful to yaya but could also be an evil, vindictive way to drive MIL nuts.
Guess I better start writing soon.
Yaya, how far does MIL live? I bet you can find some sort of remote control App that can be installed and then you'd just have to push a button and voila' TV is on again...all from the comfort of your own bed!!
Thanks for the compliment. I'm a frustrated writer with no time to write. LOL I have a million stories inside my head just clamoring for release, but no time to put them down. One of these days...
Amazingly, I have 2 accomplishments to post to Captain's thread today. Immediately after I posted my whine above, 2 amazing things happened. I'll have to share them later.
My whine for today.....getting called at 2:00 AM not once, not twice, but THREE TIMES in a row (our hellos never got a response) as hubs and I are scrambling to wake up, get dressed (more or less), grab the car keys, run out to the car in the dark of night and race over to MIL's....adrenaline pumping....questions racing through out minds - did she fall out of bed? Is she hurt?....only to get there and find her lying peacefully, calmly in her bed. What's wrong? hubs asks her. "My TV went off. I can't get it turned back on again." REALLY??!!!
I confess...I lost it a little. I'll appologize to her later, but her HHA comes to wash and dress her this morning so for now I'm going to just sit here and enjoy my coffee (and my rant) and attempt to collect myself.
Then maybe later, after I apologize, I'll post it as my "Accomplishment" for today on Captain's thread.
Day 4
Captor refuses to shower. House reeks of b.o. and urine, and whenever she moves (which is rarely), the intense odor increases, causing me to nearly gag. I try to open windows to increase ventilation - she counters this move by demanding I close them and turn the heat up, thereby stifling me in this odorous, closed-in space. She sees my discomfort but says nothing - heartless. She constantly increases the volume on the television, making it impossible to concentrate on anything - and when I am able to gain control of the remote and turn it down (or off) when she's sleeping, she wakes up and insists I turn it back on - or that I turn it back up - and then goes back to sleep! Torture. There must be a law against this sort of treatment.
She sleeps...but wakes immediately upon my having completed a task and returned to my seat to begin my work....and demands that I get back up and retrieve something for her from the next room, or make her a snack - things she could easily do herself, but requires of me instead.
I must escape. But how? I have no allies, no confidants who will come to my aid. They abandoned me when I entered this place, saying they had lives of their own and couldn't help me. I cannot even count on my government to intervene on my behalf.
I must remain strong. I will.
Not too much incentive for the guys to be too particular. Thus, my husband never really liked a shower and used the hand bowl for most of his cleanliness. Now, I can just barely get him to do that. And a bath or shower - heaven forbid. "I haven't done anything to get dirty - why a shower so often (like once a week, at most?)
I am responsible for keeping the nether regions clean due to lack of control and poor balance, but a complete bath with shampoo - never without complaint. It's gotta' be today - putting my foot down! There! Now, I'm committed....
(sigh) ok. Rant over. Time to put on my headphones, turn on some music and try to make a dent in this pile of work. Oh wait...what's that smell....darn. Oh gee...it's Mom...again. Shower day was yesterday, and she still hasn't showered and resists all gentle nudging by me to do so. Time to play the bad guy again - which I HATE - and tell her the smell is bad in the house and she is the source. :-( It's effective - usually gets her to shower and she exclaims how much better she feels afterwards - but just getting her to do it...ugh.
HEY!! I lived. It is ok. The Hospice peeps called it "furniture skiing" Who Knew?
A two week vacation? Oh Yea! I'm down...who is parent sitting?
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yup got the guilts,the tears, the hopefuls then the not hopefuls, emotional roller coaster is an understatement..Thank you all for sharing.
Linda
Mom told the Neurologist off today... why? Well, when we left I said "she's a feisty old lady ain't she"? The doc laughed.......... OMG You are taking up for HER and not listening to me!!! Sigh....
Lots of love to all of us dealing with this... it is not easy.
She is now full of love and does not remember being a nasty cranky old feisty b*tch
double sigh
Do I have my purse?
Did I forget something? Always thinking about the purse
Where is my purse?
Arrgghhh
Mom has been declining at an alarming pace? Either that or I've been really blind.... the hallucinations started a few weeks ago. Up all hours of the night wandering the house thinking there is people in there trying to kill her.... running telling the police men ( they know she's got AZ) that I beat her... oh man...
Today she had her Neurologist appt. GOOD GOD you'd thought I was committing her!... no Ma, just a check up to make sure the patch is doing its thing. Nope, she sat there, arms folded, eyes in death slits... told the Neurologist I was just trying to get her committed and I was lying about everything. The Dr just smiled and told her that I was just trying to keep her safe. Prescribed her Seroquel ... sigh. It would be easier to have a private consult with the doc vs. describing all that goes on in front of her. SHE FORGETS!! 20 minute drive to docs, 40 questions about where we are going. 40 answers all the same. YET, I never told her.
I took her to the little mall afterwards so we could walk around and window shop and have a nice lunch. NOPE! She wouldn't get out of the car.... after much persuasion she managed to get out...but then walked ten feet behind me. Every time I stopped, she stopped and glared. If I came close to her, she'd make that hissing noise. really? She hasn't spoke to me all day (whew)
So... my whine is; why do I get so mistreated for doing my best for her and my brothers get all the Disney Dad Glory?
Mom IS going to daycare 3 times a week.... after the seroquel kicks in.
Bedtime yet?