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Geaton, thank you for the reminder about the messy back side of the tapestry. It's one of the reasons the book of Job is my favorite scripture.
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Barb, oh my... one of my favorite radio talk show hosts used to say, "You're only as happy as your least happy child." So true. I can only imagine how you feel right now. I am praying for peace in your heart and wisdom for your daughter and SIL. Also for healing and comfort for your ex, and emotional/spiritual protection for your granddaughter. It feels like chaos but the Lord is still in control. He is weaving the tapestry of our lives and we only see the non-sensical and messy backside.
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Barb: Prayers sent.
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Oh my gosh, Golden

Your story is getting more interesting by the minute!

LOL 😆, a grasshopper! Geeeeeez…

My lab partner had pregnant frog eggs fly into their hair when we were dissecting it! LOL 😆 It was gross 🤮! Oh, happy biology class memories!
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In retrospect it was funny - not at the time. I have never felt at so much of a loss.

Indeed I have had adventures with R. He is an adventurous kind of guy.

Holding the flashlight and some tools in the middle of a winter night while he mended the fences was less exciting. Rounding up and transferring some horses from a corral to a pasture was interesting and we worked well together on that one.

It was a hot summer's day and there were grasshoppers everywhere. Most of the horses were transferred with little problem but one mare was balking. R showed me where to position her foal in the pasture so the mare would go through the gate to her baby. It worked!

We got back to the house a hour or so later and I felt something scratching my stomach. Rolled down the top of my pants and my undies and a great green grasshopper sprung out, Ewwww!!!!
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Golden,

Sounds like quite an adventure!
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Your horse round up story has me laughing out loud Golden 🤣
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need - We do work together very well. I remember returning here after the evacuation that was due to the forest fire. We both just set to doing our different jobs - didn't need to communicate much unless one or the other needed a hand or it was time for a meal. The jobs got done.

But when we were first together and some of his horses got loose, it was another story. We drove there and he stopped the truck in a country lane and told me to get out here and to round up the horses that had gone that way down the road and he would go back and round up the ones that had gone in the other direction. He gave me a flashlight foo he went. I walked aimlessly down the road having no idea whatsoever what to do. Eventually he turned up again and asked me why I hadn't rounded up the horses.

R "Haven't you ever handled livestock?"

Me "Where? In my back yard?"

So he rounded them all up and told me to stand by the gate to the pasture so he would shoo the horses towards me and they would know to turn into the gate (and not run over me).

Talk about trust!!!

So I stood there in the dark, fortunately with a bright raincoat on, and he shooed this small herd of horses towards me. As he predicted they turned into the gate so were "back home" in the pasture. I knew he knew horses very well so he could predict their behaviour.

However, once this exercise was over, I told him what I knew about horses was about as much as what he knew about computers, or less. He finally got it. I did learn a bit over the years and managed to relate to them better and more comfortably for me and did help to round some up again successfully. Now I can walk through a field of horses, who are very curious and want to get close up and personal, and feel OK about it. Just move slowly, and no surprises.

Barb - I am so sorry that ex has the aggressive kind of prostate cancer. Wishing him well for future treatments and sending prayers. I am glad you are at peace with staying out of dd's choices. Sounds like a real can of worms.
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Alva, my daughter has asked her father to look after her daughter while she's away. I don't think she's expecting him to swoop in and remove his grandchild AND her husband from her apartment, but it is what it is and I'm not getting involved.

Ex's prostate cancer is sadly the aggressive kind, very probably 911-related. He will have some sort of very sophisticated scan later this week to determine next steps, but this is a gut punch for him.

Your good thoughts and reassurances are greatly appreciated.
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Golden,

You and R make a great team! You delegate and he delivers.

It’s good to see that R is able to accomplish so much.

It all comes out in the wash, doesn’t it? Most of the time, anyway. 😊
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Barb - so sorry about the blood results for your ex. He is doing well, I think to take in sil and gdg. Hopefully the trip your dd is taking will be the start of the end of that relationship. Take care of yourself in all of this.

catskie - I hope there is no break in a rib. That was my concern. Heal fast!!!

R returns tomorrow having accomplished a lot in a few days, as usual. I couldn't hire someone to do what he does. I give him a list and then when he sees other things along the way he does them too. His eye catches more than mine does. I am missing him already.
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Catskie, falling is NOT fun as adults! (Although this is a *slip* remember - not a 'fall').
Fast healing to you!

Barb, I don't know what to say.. may your daughter return safe. Hopefully like Need's friend, safe but with more sense too. Is this a 7 year itch thing?
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Im fine, bruised nothing broken. Barb what an awful situation!
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Oh, Barb, I came back to see if Catskie got off to the doc, and now THIS.

Does your daughter have a cell phone tracker and someone watching over, able to get into her phone with a code? I have actually been listening to too much true crime podcast and now am scared by this. Does someone know all the names and addresses of where she is going. If not can you get this. I am sorry, but I am serious.

Her husband should see an attorney about legal separation to my mind. Who did she think was watching the child? Her husband staying home and doing that?

Sad of the news of the bloodwork. You do know, I know, that in the treatment of cancers people often live decades even in stage IV with treatment. Esp in prostate cancers which often are very slow moving. Hope for the best. I am thankful he is informing you and even more thankful you are more or less out of this. She will leave this guy quicker without having to defend him, and she will be able more to see for herself without others to fight. I am so sad that this is her plans where her child is concerned.
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Oh, Barb

I am so very sorry to hear this. This story really expresses the saying, ‘When it rains it pours.’

It is good to see that you and your ex are communicating with each other about your daughter and granddaughter.

I am so sorry that your ex is struggling with his prostate condition.

As you know, my husband is in remission from his prostate cancer and I thank God every single day that he is doing well.

I will certainly pray that your daughter will be safe and that your granddaughter will adapt as well as she can and be comforted by others during this difficult and confusing time. I will also pray for you and your ex to have peace while in the midst of this awful situation.

One of my friends did this very same thing several years ago. She was having issues in her marriage. She got a wild hair up her a** and started chatting on some random site and ended up going to Kentucky to meet the guy.

Her grown sons had a fit that she was going to meet this man that she knew nothing about.

I asked her what was she thinking. I warned her of potential danger. Her response was, “We both love horses and he owns a stable with beautiful thoroughbred horses and I will be able to ride them anytime I want to.”

I about died when I heard her say this. I asked her what else did she know about him. She claimed that she didn’t need to know more.

Needless to say that I prayed that my friend would stay safe.

Well, she got there and everything went downhill. He was nothing like she thought that he would be like and she returned home realizing that she had been foolish in her irrational thinking.

I am hoping that things work out well for your daughter and that one day this will only be a distant memory for her and that she will be reunited with her precious young daughter.
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Update on crazy daughter:

My ex has decided to move son in law and granddaughter into his house and let daughter get on by herself. She is travelling next week to meet her ex-con sweetheart someplace upstate NY. Please pray she doesn't get herself murdered or injured by this crazy person.

I have distanced myself from this mess. I only know what ex is telling me. I have no idea if she knows that, in essence, her daughter is being taken from her home. I guess she'll find out when she returns from her trip.

To add a wrinkle to this, ex (who has metastatic prostate cancer) has just gotten back some bad blood test results, so the cancer, which had been in remission may be back.

There is no happy ending to this story.
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Catskie, Golden is right. Get to the doc today. You are "splinting" your breathing. This is likely from pain, but could be broken rib, and in rare cases even a punctured lung on that side from a broken rib. You can get pneumonia from "splinting". The short breathes cannot expand your lungs. You may only need a elastic brace, but you for sure need xray to see what you did in the lung area to the ribs. Best of luck, but don't put this off. You are likely fine, but don't take chances.
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catskie - please go see your doctor asap!!!
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I wasn't concerned until my side started to hurt when I breathe.
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Cat,

Ouch! I have slipped on my kitchen floor before. It hurts! I was sore for a week.

Hoping that you will feel better soon.
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Catskie: Please DO get seen by a physician stat as you are into day #4 with this slip and fall. Concerned about you.
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Wishing you a speedy recovery!
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My entire right side hurts & I'm 50 shades of black,blue&red. Probably call my Dr tmorro. Slipped Thursday a.m. while mopping the kitchen floor landing on right side. Bent the swiffer mop too. I Google searched injuries from slipping and was inundated with personal injury attorney websites.
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golden: Glad that R arrived. That meal sounds delicious.
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Thx folks. R arrived several hours ago and downed two large plates-full of roast chicken, stuffing, potatoes, peas and gravy, with cranberry sauce then a big chunk of cheese cake with saskatoon jam melted as a sauce for dessert. He is very slender - that was probably pretty well all he ate today. All's well that ends well!

I almost understand your neighbour, need, but I wouldn't clean afterwards - just a little before lol. But then I don't have someone to clean for me. I intend to get someone maybe once a month once I have moved.
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golden: Hugs to you, too.
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Carolyn: Hugs.
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Golden, what a pain! But, at least he is now on the road and may even be there by now. Rest.
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Oh gosh, Golden

I had a neighbor once who had severe OCD. She worked full time at a stressful job.

So, she hired a housekeeper. She cleaned before and after the housekeeper left! She went to therapy for her OCD.

She almost got a divorce because she drove her husband crazy! Her boss loved her because she was so precise in her work.
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Praise God, he is on the road. I was online and on phone calls from about 8 am when the Uber didn't turn up till about 2 this afternoon when R negotiated his way out of the near $300 drop off fee. I am wiped and the list of things I had to do hasn't been done, needless to say. A big mug of tea has helped. Maybe I can have a nap now. He should be here around 8:30 tonight. Thankfully the drop off place is only about 5-10 mins drive away.

Need - at his best he is a very sweet man who cares a lot about me and wants to help. Sometimes I think it would be cheaper to just hire someone up here to do repairs, but he is right - it wouldn't be done as well as he does it. When his mum couldn't do housework any more his dad did it - in his 80s. I asked why they didn't hire someone to do cleaning. R said that they did, but dad didn't think it was good enough so he did it over himself and eventually let the cleaner go.
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