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CW, I identify. DD1 is marrying for her second time in June. What the heck is it with destination weddings? Save it for the honeymoon. DD is going to St. Thomas. She and he both have two teenage children.

I am not going. They cannot expect everyone to go and spend the money for such a trip. I do not enjoy traveling, first of all, and it I were going to travel I would go somewhere I want to go. They are the ones doing irreparable harm to relationships! Not us!

My fear is twisteds will be going......
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Oh CM it's not even the cost so much and the rooms are the least of it; there's the flight, meals, transportation (unlike Europe there's no mass transit), plus extra for any side trips etc. It's the fact that what is supposed to be a happy occasion is instead an ordeal, it's not my idea of a holiday.
And they aren't that young, he's seeing 40 on the horizon and has always wanted kids so he's pushing to get this done. I wish they'd elope.
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CW, I'm sure I was equally guilty as a youngster but don't happy couples think how much these things will flipping well *cost*?

"We're going to tie the knot in the Maldives and you're all invited!"
[thinks - oh ffs]

Could you make a trip of it and stay somewhere within reach but not quite so ruinous?
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I talked to my nephew this morning and got told how frustrated they are trying to please everybody and how we are being stubborn and making things more complicated than they really are (probably true). And... I lived with sis and helped raise him, those 3 boys are as close to sons as I have. Not going is not an option without causing irreparable harm to a relationship that is already strained by time and distance. It's complicated.
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venting - how's it going. Glad your mum is OK.

glad -hope the wind has died down

cw - if you can't, don't!

Progress. The water level has still not gone down enough for a camera shot so this morning the guy had to dig in the back lawn. He located the blockage 7 ft inside the back fence. Now it goes to the project manager to arrange repair. Hoping that happens quickly. I know the repair will take a few days.

I called the insurance adjuster back - when she said to - but no answer. No surprise either.

DD is having some problems after her 4th chemo but so far it is manageable. Praying it stays that way.
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cw - where ever I am I will have to spend some time here at home to accommodate my kitty's needs/wants. I have set up a camping toilet in a small garden shed which is in a secluded corner of the back yard - so secluded I forget I have it and don't use it for much. It's there if I really need it. I also have one of those urinals for women who camp. It's doable.
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Golden - maybe you can spend the day at home and just go to your daughter's to sleep? Of course no bathroom is going to be difficult, if you were a man it wouldn't be 😏
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My whine is about weddings. Nephew #2 has always had some weird ideas about what is "romantic" and his fiance is all about $$$$, between the two of them their wedding is shaping up to be something I don't want any part of. We got a text they are booking an expensive resort on Vancouver Island😬 - both families are mostly back in Ontario. Nephew#1's wedding in Jamaica was bad enough but at least there was a tropical holiday in the middle of winter, plus everything - flight, transportation, drinks and food - was included. If this plan goes ahead it'll be over a year away and I'm already stressing. I. just. can't.
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Well, it's going but until the guy can get a shot of the damage with the camera it's not going anywhere fast.

I went to dd's the other day and ended up coming back home the same night. They really aren't set up for a guest. There is a futon in the basement but there also is wall to wall undone laundry, bits of technology strewn around etc. I was looking for my sense of humour under a pile of grubby sox and some very used bedding.

Dd is in no shape to deal with it or with the kids. I gently remarked she might suggest that the kids do their laundry every year or so. She just shrugged and looked at me and said "Teenagers." I nodded. I had them too.

Sil said he would set up the spare bedroom once he is off work. That may work. I don't have high expectations.

Yesterday I went over there for a bath and to rinse out a few unmentionables. That worked. Meanwhile I am "camping" here in the house. There are an assortment of public washrooms > 2 mins drive away - 3 of them in 24/7 service stations, one in an A&W very nearby which opens at 6 a.m. (I was there at 6:01 this morning) and one in Sobeys which opens at 8 a.m. I could go to a hotel on insurance money but I really don't want to. Once the house is ready and staged and being shown, Rocky and I will have to be elsewhere. That's soon enough. Rocky is loving being out in the garden and I am loving being in my home so I will manage here as long as I can. There are lots of things I can do here that don't need water but do need to be done. The plants will do fine on bottled water and I can make coffee and tea, use paper plates and so on.

Once they have evidence, by way of a photograph, that the sewer pipe is collapsed then the repair work can proceed, starting with digging up the back yard. I think I'll be lucky if the original problem is fixed by this time next week. Then the lawn will need to be fixed.

Due to covid, I am not anxious to be anywhere else than here, though I may end up in a hotel. I can come and visit with Rocky, cuddle with her, let her out etc. every day. The basement is clean now so she is fine down there at night. The thing is, at my age, you can't just can't throw a few pairs of panties into your purse, grab your thyroid meds and take off. Those days are long gone. I need plug ins for hearing aides, supplements for CFS/FM, foods I'm not allergic to, toilet paper and shampoo/conditioner I'm not allergic to and so on. The list is getting longer. So far I am managing OK, but if I get too tired of the washroom antics I'll go somewhere else. It's complicated.

I am supposed to talk with the insurance adjuster this afternoon. Wish me luck!
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A bit of a.break from winds today. It still blew but not the 40-60 mph it was yesterday.

Golden, hope all is going ok.
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Golden, I hope things are getting better for you! And for everyone going through a rough time!

Here I am on Day 3 of my challenge to myself (to focus more on me, and less on helping my mother). An enormous medial crisis (no one's fault) happened today, Sunday, while I tried to relax. My mother started choking (it all ended well). It took hours to solve the situation at home. The caregivers helped. We called the nurse, doctor. Ambulance.

My mother's choking went up and down the whole day. Seemed fine again, then bad again. One of the most stressful days. Finally, my mother's body calmed down. Blood pressure returned to normal, heartbeat, temperature. We told the ambulance to go away. My mother (competent) prefers to stay home. I agreed. She looks OK again now. We'll see what to do tomorrow. She's napping now (sitting upright in her recliner) (better not to lie down flat in case she chokes).

My deep-felt empathy for all of us, with our difficulties.
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Well that bites Golden. 😶
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Golden: That's terrible. Hugs sent.
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It has been three weeks of this endless wind! The air quality is terrible, so much dust in the air!
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Golden Google insitu sewer pipe replacement.
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@Golden,

That's terrible about the sewer line. I've had it happen a few times. Tree roots grew into it. The sewage backed up into the basement.
I hope you have the special insurance. Best thing I ever did. It's only $180.00 a year.
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Oh golden, I am so sorry!

I had a clay sewer line collapse on me once. The house was a 1890's victorian. In those days there was lots of common trenches that went through yards, not in easements, there were no easements. The line broke when the plumber tried to snake it, cleaning roots out of it which I had to do twice a year.

The utility company only allowed pvc replacement in those days. I learned of a new technology in sewer pipe that alleviated the necessity to dig up the old and put in new called in situ replacement. The new "pipe" was actually a flattish tube of material that was inserted into the old pipe, then pressurized air to inflate the new, which broke away the old clay pipe while still in the ground. But the utility did not allow the use of it yet. Ended up having to move the line because neighbor would not allow my sewer outflow to continue in the same place, under his back yard. Wouldn't you know, his property was a mess, probably the worst in the area!

https://www.aegion.com


Had to replace the old iron water line at the same time, it had corroded so badly that the water pressure in the house was very low.

Good luck, it is a maintenance thing that most never have to deal with.
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He couldn't get anywhere with the big snake so is coming back tomorrow to use the camera after things have settled so he can see. He is pretty sure the sewer pipe in the back yard has disintegrated due to age and he thinks it is on my side of the fence so my problem.

I just had a call from the project manager - very nice guy. He suggests I move out for a few days as the water has to be kept shut off. He said they are pretty sure about the pipe and can start once they have photos. It should be done by Tuesday at the latest. Of course it will take longer to fix the lawn, but I can be back in the house. I'll either stay at a hotel or at my dd's if she wants the company. She got her 4th chemo yesterday so is starting to feel rough so I am not sure she will want me and Rocky around. Rocky may be OK here as long as I visit a bit. She has her food and litter and is used to this house. I have shut off the basement, but she has plenty of cubby places to sleep upstairs.

Opening windows as much as I can to get fresh air in!

Oh my - always something!
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Golden: Oh, no! Sorry for your sewage backup issues. Sorry that R has Covid. Hugs. 💛
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Have they put a camera in the line to try to locate and identify the problem?
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glad - before the fire in 2016 our area was a tinder box - sounds like your area is that too. Not a comfortable situation.

Update - no clean up and no progress yet except to find out that the 150 ft snake isn't doing it. Another plumber with a longer snake is coming. The clean up guy said there s nothing he can do until the sewer is unblocked. It keeps backing up.

Wondering if this is a city issue as it seems to be beyond my property.

Poor Rocky doesn't know what is happening. Her night time routine has been disturbed. I guess I will give her her treats and let her sleep where she wants to. She doesn't want to go down in the basement as usual so I made her an extra litter box upstairs.


ETA - Yay! The plumber with the BIG snake is here. Hope that does it and the clean up gets done tonight!
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Several new fires today. One started by an errant spark from a welder! What the heck were they thinking?! Yes, now the welders are in trouble, on these warning there is to be no outside sources of spark or fire!
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OH NO, Golden! I am so sorry, what a pain to have to deal with!
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Sewer back up issues. This time I need a plumber and a restore company. Fortunately it's confined to part of the laundry room. I started an insurance claim. One bonus of the condo is that I will not have to deal with basement issues of any kind. Looking forward to that!

Not much will have to be tossed - the small freezer, some shelving and a few bits of baseboard and ceiling tile I had stored down there. The wooden base the washer and drier sat on will have to go. Not sure what else.

The plumber is still down there and the clean up crew will come when they are finished what they are doing elsewhere.

I really didn't need another insurance claim to deal with. I think it is the same adjuster we had for the post evac stuff and she was awful. Oh well.

On top of this R now has covid and is feeling pretty rotten, so he won't be up to work on the house for a while. I had already decided that we would not get it on the market for May 1, so aiming at June 1 now. It will happen when it will happen In guess.
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OK, here I am...Oh boy...
So my challenge was supposed to start today (22 April '22):
(1) Stop whining for at least 7 days. (2) No excuses; help myself as much as I helped my mother.

I ended up yelling (I normally never yell) while speaking to my mother today. But not at her (she knows that). But at the situation, the stress, the pressure. She (for once) spoke very calmly to me, really understood and empathized, felt the worry I have for my life.

I really needed to express what I said. So I'm glad I did it.

I hope all of you are well. Please everyone, me too, I'm trying to find the right balance: in my situation, I must tip the scales more towards me, more help towards my life. Wishing us all luck!!!!!
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Now they are saying winds to 75 mph today with temp up to 85 F. We have had so many fires already! Driving home yesterday the air was so hazy, dust in the air from the winds we have had.

A couple of days ago a fire was started by the battery of a crashed drone.
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Yes, the winds are still blowing. At work there is a bit of a break. But, at home, there is not. Tomorrow, a critical level wind warning, it is so dry, and not even work area gets out of this one!

Starting tomorrow about 11 a.m. and continuing into the night. gusts to 65 mph! It has to stop sometime, right? The level of dust gets so bad you cannot see past the houses across the street. One neighbor is in the process of moving to Wyoming where it is even worse, more often. Wonder if he is sorry yet!
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Wishing all of you, well!

I challenge myself henceforth to stop whining (at least for 7 days straight), starting from 22 April ’22.

I challenge myself to make the same Herculean effort towards myself, as I did for my mother. No excuses.
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Great, Glad!!
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Verizon problem was with the fiber network with affects throughout the country. The text message with the code finally came through about 12:30 a.m.
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