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NoTryDoYoda,

That is always intense. Poor soul doesn't know where she belongs.

Hopefully your wife wasn't bothered by it.

I have found that almost all rehabilitation facilities are in LTC facilities and some are mixed throughout and others have different wings for rehab. I guess it is a good way to see if you like the facility but, definitely changes the atmosphere and dynamics of your rehabilitation, in my experience it is a good thing.

Made my dad see that he better work to get better or this was his future.
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Some stranger came in my wife's private room at the inpatient rehab and claimed this was her room and her bed. I got her out and to the staff who helped her. This is not a rehab. It's a nursing home.
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I've seen those but Daniel is pretty sly and would probably figure it out. I'm just going to have to deal.
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Oh no Gershun!! I’m sorry to hear this! Poor Daniel can’t catch a break can be? Sending him positive thoughts & hoping the antibiotics do their job quickly!! I take he is wearing one of those awful plastic cones? They make new versions now that are like a pillow that go around the neck, Amazon has some for under $15. I almost bought one for my dog when he had to wear a cone of shame recently!

cwillie, I have to admit that’s a simple solution that never occurred to me!! THANK YOU!! Actually the solution to 2 problems. My old man Spike is the other problem, he’s nearly 16 and going deaf and blind and has terrible cataracts and after 15 years of being obedient and staying in the garage when the door is open, he has started wandering off! So I’m constantly putting up the child gate while everyone else leaves the door open and moves the gate and doesn’t put it back up. Looks like amazon has lots of different automatic door closers, let’s see if I can get hubby to install one!
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Gershun,

So sorry about your kitty. You are such a good momma to him. He’s blessed to have you. Pets are our babies.
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My whine today is we took my cat Daniel in for his latest procedure and his sutures became infected. So now he is on heavy antibiotics internal and external which means he wears a cone which I have to take off and put on again every time he eats. He is so miserable and his sutures look ghastly. I can't tell if they are getting better or not.

But I love him and that's why it's hard cause I hate to see him unhappy.
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I have three words for you Worried - automatic door closer.
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Awww Pam! That is so sweet of your guys to do that while mom is away. It does sound like it will be lovely when it’s done.

My whine moment is that it’s that time of year when hubs spends a lot of time tinkering around in the garage and I am left freezing my arse off in the house because he & the kids leave the kitchen door open (door in the kitchen going out to the garage). He has turned the garage in to quite a man cave! Over the summer he got a pub table & chairs, 2 years ago my SILs hubby sold him a commercial heater & he came out and hung it in the garage so now the garage is heated. And for Christmas I got him a TV which he promptly hung out there. It’s COLD now and I just get so irritated that it’s freezing in the house while he’s out there with his heater going. I could turn the heater on inside and I do, but it does no good when my family constantly leaves the door open. I close the door but they are all in and out constantly so it’s always open!! I despite this so much. I guess I should bundle myself up and go out and sit at his pub table under the heater since it’s warmer out there than it is in the house!
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Pam,

That sounds really nice. That’s a lot of work but it will be lovely when completed.
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No good deed goes unpunished! We decided to redo moms bath in the rec room while she was at aunts. Couldn't do it while she was home as it would take ( we thought) a day or two. OH NO.. after pulling the old peeling wall paper down,, we discovered the custom builder who built this place for himself cut a few corners, shall we say. Never prepped the walls under the wallpaper,, can't get the glue off, drywall flaking off... So hubs is now on day 2 of applying oil based primer ( the only thing that will cover the glue and save the walls) and the fumes are about to kill us all. very cold here, windows open, fans running.. thank god he got that all done today. The fumes are better in the morning. So now he only has to put 2 coats of normal paint on, and we will rehang things. I bleached the heck out of her shower curtain ( it is irish lace and beautiful but was all discolored from her smoking, I had to bleach soak it 3 times) and I got her a clear under curtain. So it will seem much brighter for her! Her vision is poor, and she felt it was dark there. I picked a very light blue for the paint, as the room has a beach theme. It's a surprise for her, and I hope she will love it!
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pamzimmrrt - I have been considering hiring a CG for a few hours for hubby's upcoming surgeries so I can be there for him when he wakes up. We found out today his graft for dialysis is infected and needs to be removed. They'll have to place a temporary catheter to do dialysis through until his infection is completely gone and then a NEW graft will need to be placed. These are all very painful procedures and my heart is just breaking for my husband. On top of that he's having a flare up of sciatica localized to JUST the buttock so the pain is worse than if it were to travel the whole leg. He just can't seem to catch a break and neither can I. I reached out to my aunt (my mom's sister) and my dad's good friend to see if they had any availability to stay with him. I'm considering reaching out to my mother who I don't speak to. She's just about as bad as my sister so that's my last resort before hiring a CG.
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Dwilliams I hope they get to the bottom of hubs problem soon, that is so scary! And you are lucky you have a good friend, as your sis sounds like a piece of work. Can your dad qualify for any help ( I know this takes time) or could you hire CG for a few hours a day with his money to give you a break? I think under the circumstances that would be very appropriate.
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My "whine moment" of the day: We moved my dad in on Saturday morning. We are not at all prepared but it couldn't be put off anymore. Later that night my husband was in a tremendous amount of pain and had a high fever. I asked my sister to stay with my dad while I went to the ER and she gave me a hard time -- despite living in his house rent free btw. Thankfully one of my friends is just an angel and she sat with him for 6 hours while I was at the ER.

My husband was admitted for fever and pain with unknown source. They're still doing testing. Every time they have an idea of what's going on it doesn't pan out and then it's on to the next theory. So it's me and Dad alone the last few days. He talks in his sleep -- LOUDLY. He peed his pants this morning so we started off first thing this morning with a shower and laundry. I have not been sleeping well -- 4-5 hours of broken sleep at night. Not eating well -- a cup of stuffing, a cup of coffee and FINALLY hungry this afternoon I had a Chipotle burrito. That's all I've eaten in 3 1/2 days.

My sister and her boyfriend are living in my dad's house alone until we sell and they STILL have not started cleaning and packing up their junk. And I mean junk... 40 oz beer cans, bottles, garbage all over her room. It looks like an episode of hoarders. I had to threaten eviction last night if they don't make some progress by next Monday.

On top of all of that I got a letter in the mail from the town that if we don't have the dying tree in the front yard at my dad's house removed within 30 days, we will be fined.

I'm getting a bit of a break tonight from another angel, a friend of my dad's is making dinner for him and taking him to an AA meeting so I can go spend time with my husband -- about 4 hours. I miss my husband like crazy and I hate not being able to spend more time at the hospital. I hope the doctors get to the bottom of what's wrong with my husband because the stress of everything is unbearable. I've never been stressed to the point of losing my appetite.

*deep breath*
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MaryBee,

How was the movie? I want to see it.

Sorry about your dilemmas. Hugs!
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My Whine Moment for today: husband was off during the holidays so I took the opportunity to go out for awhile by myself. I browsed in an antique mall then went to see the movie Little Women. 20 minutes to the end of the movie, my phone buzzed. I finished the movie and when I checked the message it was from my mother-in-law. She didn’t need me to bring anything home or anything like that. But while I was out at a movie she needed to tell me “I’m really sick. I think I’m coming down with something. But don’t worry about me . I’m gonna go to bed early. I just wanted to let you know.”
2nd whine moment: we were going to go to a Christmas party and had a caregiver lined up to come stay with dear MiL. Caregiver called off sick. It happens, germs going around. But we had to miss the party. Ha it doesn’t sound so bad when I write it down but I was disappointed at the time.
There, now I feel better!
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Thanks Cali! My hometown. I love our Saints!

Hey, please root for LSU. we are undefeated. Have to win the game on the 13th. Geaux Tigers!

My daughter is graduating this May from LSU and I would love to see them win.
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Needhelp, I was rooting for the saints too! Hopefully the Seahawks beat the Eagles.

Have to whine about the husband and the new car now. And it’s a petty first world complaint too. He turned on a setting in the car that, when you turn the car off, the steering wheel raises and the seat moves all the way back. Some sort of setting that makes it easier to get out of the car apparently. Well short people like me (5’3”) don’t need that setting. I didn’t know he turned this setting on and figured it out when I got back in the car after loading my groceries this morning! I had to push the button that automatically positions the steering wheel, seat and side mirrors to MY personal settings and wait a few moments before I could start the car. Which isn’t a big deal BUT it’s annoying. I cannot start the car if my foot isn’t on the brake because it has a push start. And I cannot reach the brake pedal when the seat is all the way back. When I got home I asked hubby why he turned that setting on and I asked him to turn it off and he said “it should automatically adjust to your settings when the car turns on”. And trying to get him to understand that I CAN’T reach the brake petal to turn the car on was a futile attempt on my part. So I guess I will have to start remembering to use the remote start option to the car on before I get in. It’s just annoying because I don’t need the easy out setting and I liked it how it was before he changed the setting!
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Vikings played well. Oh well...we didn’t make it. Close game but they beat us.

Boo hoo🙁
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Better put on my Vikings sweatshirt! OT. Sorry, NHWM, it is a Scandinavian thing.

😀
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Yoda,

Best wishes to your wife. Tough situation.
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Vikings just scored. Grrrrr.

WHO DAT! Geaux Saints!

LSU plays on the 13th. Hope they win. My daughter graduates in May. Would really like for them to end the season with the championship!
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My wife is having to go to a residential rehab to recover from her knee replacement surgery. She can't put any weight on the leg with the new knee due to how soft her knee bones are and the doctor wants the cement to dry well first. Thus, she can only get around on one leg with her walker. Her twin sister is now here with me, but we agree with my wife that we can't care for her here. Another problem is my wife's blood pressure keeps going high and low. What a mess!
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Worried, your snoring post made me laugh...I have two small dogs, one sleeps on the left side of my pillow, the other on the right...they both snore loudly...it is like having a stereo headset on. I move them, go to sleep and then they sneak back up!
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Daughteritis,

Have you considered seeing a therapist to work through these emotions? The combination of talk therapy and medical therapy work very well together and you might reach the point where you don't need the meds.
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To all that are caring for a loved one. My mother finally went to a home and 4 months later I’m still dealing with guilt. I’ve had to be under doctors care to for my depression. I bit off waaaaaaaay more than I could chew. Don’t follow my steps
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Caregiving while sick is awful, I can very well remember masking and gloving up and fanatically disinfecting everything I might have touched to prevent spreading my germs when all I wanted to do was crawl into bed and stay there. I was "lucky" in that my mom was immobile, I can't imagine how much more difficult all that would have been if she had been able to freely roam the house. Hope you feel better soon.
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I feel like crap today got a bad cold fever sneezing coughing. Don’t feel like taking care of my 91 year old mother with LBD who can’t do anything for herself! But there is no one else.
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freqflyer,

It probably has had to go through probate, but I think in this state you only have two years and that will be up in two months.

There are no family problems between my wife and her twin sister.
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NoTryDoYoda, does your late Mom-in-law estate need to go through Probate? If yes, it can take quite awhile. My Dad's almost took two years to finalize as there were so many accounting reports to file over time.

My parents had an "Elder Law Attorney" and her paralegal was helping me with the complex reports, thus the cost was for her work, not that of the Attorney.

If there is no probate, is there a family issue? My late Grandmother's estate took 10 years to settle because none of the five grown children could agree and some were getting their own attorneys, etc. All it did was slow up the works and cause more taxes to be paid, and more attorney fees.
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Needhelp, thanks! I haven’t thrown out the tea yet so I will try that. All I know is that by itself, that peppermint stuff is terrible!
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