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Hope, Staceyb said it best! I am hoping you enjoy your well deserved respite!
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Jeanette I'm happy for you too that you had a nice dream with your Mom. I had one a few nights ago. Mom and I were sitting on my couch watching t.v. together like we have so many times. I kept staring at her and wanting to touch her face cause I didn't think she was real but I stopped myself cause I sensed that she didn't know she was dead.

Are there any dream interpreters out there?

When my brother died I had dreams of him all the time. One in particular that seemed so real. He knocked on my door and when I answered it he just kept saying "Move out, move out. they are all going to die in the furnace" I said who is going to die and he just walked away. That was ten yrs. ago but I still wonder if I should move. Dreams are weird.

Hope I have never had a face book account for the very reason that you described. I have enough people I know making me feel bad. I don't need it from people I don't know. Plus what would I talk about?

It reminds me of those "I Saw You" ads in the paper. You know the ones. "Oh you were on the bus. We looked at each other. I looked away. I regret it now. E-mail me" To me this is just an easier way for stalkers to get their victims.

My Mom and I used to always joke about this. I always imagined someone saying about me. "Oh I saw you staggering down the hall in your pajamas to get your mail, I could tell you hadn't washed your hair in days, I just love the food stains on your pajama top. E-mail me" My Mom and I had a good laugh.

Anyway, forgive me for babbling.
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Jeanette!!!! Yay!!! I"m so excited for you!!! So glad you finally got that little message from your Mom....I love those...they seem to come at the most unexpected moments...but they always come...when they're needed most. :)
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Jude bless your heart..I feel for you...I know having Mama in the hospital is the most tiring and ind bending time on earth...It truly wears on you. I hope your Mom continues to do better and you are able to rest some more...

Jeanette, thanks for your willingness to go to bat for me...I finally just deleted that post, not because I changed my mind, but because I just don't need any more cursing and name calling on MY page when I said nothing offensive to anyone...other than believing we need to be respectful to law enforcement...
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My Mama is on her way to her spa stay...and I miss her already...bless her heart..she is so sweet and I told her she would get a little break from me and I would get my self straightened out and she seemed to understand..

After last night getting my rear chewed on for a while I am still feeling like I have been beaten up so I feel kind of wacko.....I know you all think I'm ridiculous to let someone whom I do not know affect me simply by saying those horrid words...but the words he used are ones I never thought anyone would call me and all because he and I just had different opinions...and he reported me so I couldn't even respond for a while because my page got locked, but he continued to bash me via pm and so by the time I was able to respond I couldn't. I know, I know, I wear my heart on my sleeve, but dog gone it ...that hurt...

The house is already too quiet...As tiny as Mama is she has always been such a huge presence in our family..her absence is so vastly missed when she is not here....I sent all her stuff with them and I will go later and just make sure she is nice and tucked away and take one of her little comforters so she'll be nice and cozy. I love you all and I truly mean that....I know I would be lost without this group of folks....

I used to go to FB to feel like I belonged somewhere...Not only do I NOT want to go on there now, I am thinking of just copying all my pictures onto a disc and deleting my account altogether...who needs that aggravation.

Again, thank you all for your encouraging words ....If I could reach out there and hug you all I would do it...virtual hugs to all!!!! now ...what to do with me for a few days....the funny thing is...all I want to do is go to sleep....
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Jude I sent you the links to that company. When I tested them, they looked like it took me to a page that says something like link broken..BUT...there is a link on that page that says go to home page...that will get you there....I get the adaptive poly cotten ones that have the short sleeves and I have always been very happy with all of them.. Let me know if you run into a problem finding it...maybe it's something with this site that causes the oddities..normally it goes right to it
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Hope pm me I need more than 3

Jeanette its easy I don't sleep more than 4 hours a day

I am wasted at the moment though all this thing and froing to hospital meetings with consultants in all sorts of things and then solicitors, shopping for furniture that will fit selling furniture that won't fit has me up the wall and is still driving me there.

Good and bad day today Mum looks much better - mums temper is much worse
Dad died 17 years ago this very morning so she has had a bad night and don't we all know it - like we don't remember him at all!!! not much - he was and always will be my guiding light

I hadn't been on the ward 2 minutes when she said the nurses haven't washed me they told me to wash myself. Hmmm if I find out that is true that nurse will be looking for a new job but I hold my tongue. Don't worry says I - I will do that right away for you.
Not your job - well I am making it my job - might as well you do nothing else. No I know mum - I just cant be bothered to argue. So off I trot to find gowns towels cloths cream lotions and potions - the nurses are brilliant - found everything for me pads, knickers - the lot and then offered to help - I said listen she's grumpy already let me do it - you have a break. The nurse said I can't imagine she wasn't washed but I have only just come on duty - I can't either but I am not going to START an argument - especially one we can't win. Anyway the nurse came in to help me and mother started the rant - her it was her said I could wash myself - lazy she is doesn't want to work - she's just like you are. Fine pair you make. Eyes caught eyes over her head and we just smiled conspiratorially. We washed Mum I creamed her body as per usual and the nurse looked at me as if I was mad - stops her skin sheering - prevention is better than cure hun.

At that point the consultant calls for me and daughter so off we go. he was really nice Mums raised liver count could be liver damage they don't know yet or the extent or if it is the big C visiting its a wait and see. He has noticed she has gone downhill from her last stay and said it will go in steps now - we don't know enough about any dementia to make confirmed prognoses but we do know enough about your Mum to be able to see how hers is progressing. He explained how prolonged antidepressants cause hyponatremia (spelling is probably wrong) and affect the liver adversely - yet without them she is suicidal. We discussed alternatives but they are limited - apparently they all have that effect.

Back to ward and she is ranting to anyone that will listen that she needs to have a wash. Time to go home methinks
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Jude, sounds like you Mum is full of P&V, will she be comming home soon? Or will they be sending her to rehab? That might be helpful to allow you to get more packing done for the big move! I'm sure you're very tired of all this now, the back and forth is so exhausting, it's probably easier to have her home. Anyways,I'm thinking of you and hoping that things run smoothly in the days ahead and I don't mean her bowels, lol! Get some rest Dear! Love Stacey B
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Great idea on the gowns,Jude.You must be a good seamstress.My Mother wears only robes,They have to completly unzip in the front and be petite.She likes her blue one the best.
I hate seeing my Mother like shes been the past week especially.
I wonder why older people become so obsessed with going to the bathroomOur recipe of senna,miralax and suppositories was working and all the sudden stopped.Oh,the bathaid is here.
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Hope Love, I'm so happy the time has come for you to finally get the respite you so richly deserve. God will surely be watching over your Mama for you I just know it! Enjoy your time now and try not to worry too much, they will take good care of her! Get some good sleep for the first day or so, then get out and do something fun, start a new project, read a great book, or catch up on your favoriteTV programs! Go to the beach, or lakeside, and enjoy nature and the peace and quiet! Order out your favorite food, and garden to your hearts content,as there will be no worries to interrupt your solace. I know you will be in to visit her, bring her a treat each time and remind her it's only a few days, and that your catching up on the nessasaries for her return. God bless you for being such a wonderful loving Daughter, nobody (except everybody else here, lol) deserves this time off more than YOU! It will all be Alright! Love Stacey B
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Hope, just had to thank you and your mama.

I was just outside watering, which is my zen thing to do. Standing there, thinking about you and your mom heading to hospice house today, seeing the sparkle in her eyes, it HIT me. I remembered dreaming of my own mother last night, laughing with someone whom was going to watch her, telling her to watch out for her eyes to start sparkling with mischief and don't be offended if she calls her an a**. Then mom laughed and said that was her "pet" word .... ohhhh, I do believe this is the first time I have dreamed of her. It was lovely seeing her again.... sniff
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Katie, I agree with everything you said. The stress of it all is just exhausting and really makes you want to stay away from people! I wear my helmet so much it's become a permanent fixture :/
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Hope my love God watched over Mama the last time you let her go so there is no reason to think he won't this time and he will send one of his special angels to stay at her bedside the whole time she is away just as he does when you go outside to work in the yard. Rest easy my darling.
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Awh hope, your darling mama is such a pretty lady, inside and out. Her eyes always seem to be sparkling :) Of course you'll miss her. Even though she isn't chatty the house will suddenly seem silent... enjoy the break! Wish I had of seen the disrespectful person who attacked you on FB. Personally, I love a good challenging conversation and understand we all have different opinions at times or regarding certain situations. Lately I've been staying away from FB to clear my head of every one else's thoughts... LOL

CM, read the height challenged pony story LOL, what a cutie pie and how nice of them to make that contraptionscope ;) HEY, the just had a segment on the news about how American comfort foods like BBQ, shrimp n grits and apparently all our fatty delicious foods are taking over London!!

Jude, just how do you have the time and energy to sew gowns?
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Waiting for them to come and take Mama to the respite care home. I have her all packed and ready to go. I hope I didn't forget anything, but it's not that far if I need to carry something....I know I need the break, but I am already knowing I am going to miss her....She seems very perky and seems to understand she is just going to be away temporarily. I told her she was going to the nice place she liked the last time where she had the pretty view and that she would be home this Saturday...in the meantime I was going to get my act together...she said...Yay! God bless her....praying all goes well like it did last time...I know this is a good place and I know our hospice team will be keeping an eye on her....I can't help worrying....please God watch over Mama....I love her so much..
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Jude, the gowns sound lovely...I know what you mean, just seems like all hospital gowns are not only ugly but very scratchy fabric as well. I finally found a company that makes very pretty, easy care, wash and dry hospital gowns and I now have 10 of them...floral, some with butterflies, some with checks, some that are seersucker, all have soft lace around the neckline...they are perfect and very reasonably priced. I was going to make Mama some as well, but found this site and I bought mine buy 5 get one free....the price is very very reasonable ...if anyone is interested let me know and I guess I can sent that in a pm..I don't know..can I do that?
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Jude, the nightgowns are a fabulous idea!!!

The sibling thing has me so puzzled and I can't believe how so many people are having issues. I have no siblings, but my husband's spoiled, indulged sister who just moved in with his Mom is a real piece of work, has had all kinds of problems in her life that she brought on herself by bad behavior, has let herself go in health and appearance, and I wonder just how much she is doing for the MIL as she sleeps till noon, claims she is "ill" and finds excuses to go out all the time. Luckily for her MIL is still mobile, but she is getting more frail at 84. She and my husband are not close at all because she has always been spoiled and mainly because of her behavior. Another out of state friend has her brother fighting with her about their Mom's care and they don't even speak anymore. It seems to me that the siblings often add to the stress instead of rallying together in a crises like this and helping.

We all have so many problems to solve and challenges daily that we don't need stress from outside sources, be it siblings, or business, work, home health aides, nursing home personnel, etc! Other problems don't seem to stop when the caregiving one starts and some days I feel bombarded with other things on top of this. I really don't like waking up each morning and groaning, realizing what life has become and all it's problems and it seems I will never really be happy again as I once seemed to be. Or maybe I was just naive and clueless as to how things could get... Well, time to start my day and I am putting on my helmet to do so.
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Yay! Jeanette, Google Pedroscope for a cute horse story - (n.b. you don't need to donate, they've already hit their target several times over).
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Also, you won't be worrying what the last person to wear it had and whether the outsourced laundry service is as 100% on top of things as we like to think it is.
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Bless you, Jude, you are such a sweetheart !
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and want not wasn't - I need to proof read better
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broderie anglais not border anglais grrrr prédictive text
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God I am a whining cow....OK new whinge - has anyone EVER seen pretty hospital gowns? I mean really? they are ghastly and ugly - mind you if they were pretty they would only be stolen I guess .... yesterdays mission was to buy some pretty material that is relatively sturdy in the washing arena (bearing in mind it is one person not hundreds who will be wearing it and it is going into a domestic not industrial washing machine.

Drags darling daughter off to fabric shop with design in mind and yes I am now the proud owner of 3 x 2 metre lengths of the prettiest border anglais material.
It is scalloped along one edge (Great no need to hem then) with really pretty embroidery. So now I all set. A simple v necked fronted teeshirt type yoke and a curved edge back making it big enough to go over Mums head . Thats the top then all I have to do is sew a straight piece onto it with two pleats under the bust each side at the front and that cross over for modesty but open for ease of using the toilet at the back and voila she too will have easy to use nightwear.

So I spoke to Mum and told her the good news and what did she say? I don't know why you bother I might not be coming out. You know I want to die why did you waste my money on trash - I guess my reply wasn't very supportive but they say agree agree agree so I did - I said but you wasn't to look pretty when you die don't you? And bless her she said yes and then added that sounds like a nice nightie. Now I won't want her to wear the damned thing in case she dies when she puts it on!
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I know. .it is insane! .. this was a man whom i know only via animal rescue but buddy he got wound up tonight and he called me some horrible things. ..especially once he started sending me pm's..i was going to unfriend him but he got me first. .good riddance there. .but i think I'm going to try to array of it for a while. Even though i know he does not even know me. .ugliness like that is hurtful right now and something i just don't need. ..very sad
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Hope, isn't it amazing how people can treat others on FB? I got off FB when I discovered that someone was seeking to be friends with my elderly aunt and she had to warn her friends not to accept his friend requests. Then, my sister's friend could see my posts, because he was friends with her, but I didn't want him to know anything about me. Too public!
Please don't take it personal, aren't those bad comments from "trolls"?

Aging Care has just updated their security on this site, hope that helps.
We all should just keep reminding ourselves it is public, and take the necessary precautions.
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Well, reading about your brother made me really aggravated Jeanette....I can't imagine what made him go off like that unless, as Jude said, he is feeling a lot of guilt about what he did NOT do. He knows you did it all and maybe he actaully resents you for it even though, had you not done it...then who???

I don't know..go figure..after getting my fanny blown out of the water tonight on FB I am just befuddled about life in general. I don't even know where all that ugliness and hatefulness came from . This man I don't know even told me that money was good, maybe one day I would have some...what does that even mean??? wth...people now are so rude and ignorant. another reason I just prefer Mama and my furkids...
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Well, evidently I am filled with anger, hate and insecurity and certainly possess zero sensitivity....I was informed of that tonight on FB by someone whom I know only by way of my animal rescue efforts. A few of my friends began to chime in in support of what I was saying and then he went "underground" and starting sending me private messages and called me every foul, ugly name in the book...and I have never in my life been called stuff like that..not even by my horrid ex sister in law...I was and still am shocked. I have definitely decided I need to put FB aside for a while. These clowns don't have a clue what I deal with and they don't care..they only want to hear themselves harp...I don't need it...or them...he informed me he was unfriending me...I thanked him for that and thereafter I blocked him..good riddance...I am beginning to agree with my brother that FB causes a whole lot of trouble....
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I agree with Jeanette Lucky. I also think actions speak louder than words. Talk is cheap. If someone tells me they love me but treats me like garbage I have a tendency to not believe them. Call me sensitive.......

Brothers are weird too. I have three. One is deceased. One is schizophrenic. So I really would like to nurture the relationship with the one who is "normal" Not that I don't feel that my mentally ill brother is abnormal but his illness makes things difficult. But siblings have to meet each other half way.
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Well lucky, I was told by my brother that I am "too sensitive".

Personally, I always felt they were too insensitive.

Always thought being sensitive was a great quality, so you keep being yourself lucky. Let those suffer their own guilt.
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Ive tried for 54 years to have a relationship with my brothers but every time I think were doing better,they say or do something that hurts me.It really hurt me the other day when my brother saw me fall and didnt even ask if I was ok.And when they walk out the door and say I love you sometimesit just feels like ,really?Is this how brothers show love?
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