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Laying ears back: what does "sharing of comforting thoughts" mean in the context of a funeral service programme? It's item 4, right in the middle. Who's sharing? What's comforting? Mutter grumble harrumph rhubarb rhubarb...
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I understand how you feel, Luckylu. It is kind of rubbing your nose in it, isn't it. It used to gall me beyond measure when I'd get "all that" from siblings because they were so busy organising their party or a month's tour of the Far East… oh dearie me, you poor thing, I would think. How terribly terribly tiring it must be for you. No wonder you have no energy to spare for your mother.

On the other hand. Their having a nice time and seeing interesting things doesn't in itself make things any worse for us. The world goes on, even if we're not participating in its more exciting bits right now. You'll feel better about it if you take a lively interest in what they've been up to, which is at least one way of sharing in it if only on the margins. And tell them next time they can bring you back some chocolates - and arrange to take over when it's *your* turn for a break!
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Yesterday,on Mothers Day I listened to my 2 brothers talk about how much fun they had hiking and the beautiful waterfall they saw.They also talked about trips and vacations.It is always very hurtful to me and Im already beyond depressed.Im home with my dying Mother and very thankful I still have her but I wish theyd either shut up or help me.
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When my Mom went to the hospital and then the nursing home for some PT for a few weeks I really missed her and kept going into her room. Then I got used to her being at the nh. but I go each day and bring her clean clothes and to see what is going on. This is a different nh than the one she was in before and is run really well. While she has been in there for PT I am getting tons of things done here. I know when she is back that I will have very little time for anything else.
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Susan, Gershun, Shilo CM and everyone else - going on hols for 4 days now and a bit busy after that so if I dont message on here its not because I dont care but because where we are going there is no wifi. My thoughts will be with you all as you struggle through - and for those of you who find it a breeze can you just explain how come! Talk to you all soon Stay strong ladies and gents - KEEP THE FAITH
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My prayers are with you,Im so sorry.
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The cries of 'Don't leave me!' during her NH stay and now 'Keep me company' have made my heart bleed lately. I don't like it either Susan.
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Thinking of you tonight, Gershun.

Mom is settled in the nursing home, but looked at me with such sad eyes tonight when I told her she should close her eyes and rest, and said, "I don't want you to go away." My heart just broke. It was all I could do to hold it together at that moment, and later, when I had to leave. She's so afraid to be alone.

My heart just aches for her tonight. I hate this part of life. I know it's inevitable, unavoiadable, etc. Doesn't mean I have to like it.
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Gershun, so sorry for your loss.
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Gershun My condolences on the loss of your mother. You should be very proud of your caring for your mother. She will always exist in your heart.
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Gershun, so very sorry for your loss.
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gershun your Mom did it her way. Feel thankful that you had been there and helped her in her transition so that she was able to choose the right time for her. Be at peace you have nothing to regret.
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working on my rainwater collection system today . our county reservoir is a lake with a few hundred 40 yr old houses sitting on the waterfront . by todays standards none of them would qualify for an adequate septic field so yea , rainwater is going to be much cleaner . i am so dam cheap . ive been back in my house for 15 days and used 25 bucks worth of electricity . crappin in a bucket and dumping it around the fruit trees again . old habits die hard .. my toilet works fine im just to cheap to toss 5 gallon of water thru it with every flush .
my BS has only begun . ill probly have a homemade windmill and low voltage lighting at some point . my aunt is my hilljack inspiration . her and her husband built their own shack too . for months they walked across floor joists from the kitchen to the living room until they could afford floor decking . if shes alive in another year id love to have her living here . thats a bit farfetched but then PIA aint in the best of health . she could crappy off before her mom does .
gershun , my mothers legacy lives on every day . did you know she invented copper wire ? she was fighting a jewish person for a penny ..
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all the best of healing to you gershun . the loss will never go away and it shouldnt . your mothers legacy must shine on .
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Gershun - I will keep you in my prayers. Please remember to take care of yourself especially in the next few days. ((((hugs))))
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((((hugs)))) to you Gershun. I'll be thinking of you and praying for you and your family in the coming days.
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Gershun. My thoughts and prayers are with you. You did a tremendous job of taking care of your mother and I also believe she wanted to wait for you to leave to spare you the stress of her passing on. You have many memories to ponder of the good times now. Also know that we are all here if you need us!
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(((hugs))) I truly understand what a hard road you've traveled and as book said... she waited for you to leave, your mother knew you had enough stress and sadness and wanted to spare you. What a lovely lady :) You should have ZERO guilt... just a heart filled with fond memories as your mother travels to her new home. Take care hun and keep in touch :)
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Gershun, my condolences on your Mom. I truly believe she waited for you to leave so that she can 'let go'. The guilt will be there but it should not be an overwhelming one. You were there for her when she needed you most. You did great. {{{HUGS}}}
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Gershun darling my heartfelt condolences to you - you did Everything you could have done my love. Much much more that was expected from you. Your mum wanted to die when you werent there sweetheart - my dad did the same. Take comfort that she is now at peace. Take some time today to gather your strength and thoughts for the coming days for they too will be difficult and know we are here for you whenever you need us xxxxxx
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Hi Everybody,

My dear Mom passed from this life tonight at 8:30. I guess if I had stayed for a few more hours today I could of been there.

With all the hours I sat beside her it seems like the fact she passed when I wasn't there means maybe thats what she wanted.

Thank-you all for all of your kind thoughts and sympathies. I think I am in shock right now. The next few days, weeks, months will be hard but I will get through it knowing that my Mom is no longer in pain and is with the good Lord in heaven.
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Thank-you pamzimmrrt.
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Good luck and my thoughts are with you Gershun. My fathers memorial service is next weekend...
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I meant to say if my mom doesn't die tonight i will be back tomorrow.
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Well I just got back from my Mom's bedside. It won't be long now.
I seem to be the only one left keeping vigil. I sit there and count her breaths. I feel I am being morbid now. My siblings visits have lessened. They know.
I know too but I am compelled to keep sitting there.

The pastor from my Mom's church left a message for me. I e-mailed him cause I know I will break down if I talk to him and since I don't really know him.........well you know.

I had to go home. If my mom dies tonight I will be back tomorrow even though I know its not good for me. I'm waiting by the phone now.
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Well, Mom has been up and sitting in a chair 3x today, so that's a major step for her. I'll be leaving in about 45 minutes to go home for the night, and of course, she wants me to stay longer. I think it's partially for company, partially because she forgets how to operate the remote and is concerned about falling or not having someone right here to watch out for her. I know the nurses will take good care of her - the nurse on duty tonight calls Mom "a Houdini" because of her ability to wriggle out of her shoulder sling (for the pacemaker) and her repeated attempts to get out of bed. She's been somewhat confused today, repeatedly saying she can't wait to go home tomorrow and see the dog and cat, and then saying she knows she's going to the nursing home for therapy. So the confusion is kind of up/down today. I'm so, so worried that something else is going to happen and she won't be able to come home at all. It happens all too often - they go to the nursing home for a temporary stay and end up staying permanently due to some other medical issue coming up while they're in there.
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CM I am sitting here giggling to myself waiting for the vicar to come and pay you a condolance visit and comment about the baby wrabits on the lawn. he will probably say a prayer for Mums everlasting peace so you can assume all is taken care of whatever they put in the funeral service.
I would name them Oregano, Mint, Rosemary, Dill, Parsley and Basil. Their Mum of course is Mrs Dash
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im not a very nice person , let me beat everyone else to that conclusion --but i love my aunt . when nature cranks out another pioneer like her i hope to marry the b*tch ..
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wow victories come in small increments and unexpectedly . took cuz terry trike riding today and he informed me that cuz PIA had left permission for edna and i to go country truck riding again . no more often than twice a week and only with her phoned consent ( control freek ) but still a major victory for my girl dying from cabin fever in NH . pia is still a hor , make no mistake about that but edna and i will take what we can get . cappy aint workin tomorrow . edna and i are gonna riding goddamnit !! edna doesnt comprehend much but shes incredibly grasped the fact that her and i are outta that shithole twice a week . i aint the forgiving type , i still hope pia dies tonight , in fact before i end this post but still a major victory for edna and i either way ..
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LOL CM bad girl bad bad bad girl roars with laughter...sorry folks again no offence intended to others it just amuses this person and I know I will be going down the ways when I die
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