I'm tired of cooking/preparing 3 meals a day. It's just the two of us but boy oh boy can that woman eat!! She stays slimish, I get fattish. It's bad enough I do everything here much less start making her one thing and me the other. At times I feel guilty when I buy her fast food cuz of the nutritional value....not to mention I eat it too.
No hope, she's not on hospice. I asked her dr about it several months ago but he kind of skipped over it. Perhaps I will just bypass him and have hospice come out and do their own evaluation. I found binder full of information they gave me for my dad. With his death I got a total of 3 days of hospice. He didn't want people in here so I took the brunt of it. Not going to do that with mom or else I will not make it through. Reading through the binder of information they gave us for day, mom shouldn't have any problems qualifying. None. If I were to go by the signs of imminent death it lists... well, that is where the AD patient may have a hard time getting admitted into hospice. Doesn't matter, I am going to give it a try. She is not doing well. As soon as I can get her up I will give her a UTI test. Thank God I copped the "hat" at the last UC visit. She's lost so much weight... her appetite is just gone, nothing tastes good anymore aside from ice cream bars and peanut butter cups. Even those shakes she loved and would drink 3 or more large glasses a day has dwindled down to 1 and that's with constant help from me. I feel like I need to make her eat/drink or I'm failing her. How can I just sit here and watch her deteriorate like this? My thinking is if she'd eat more/drink more she would do better, get stronger, live longer.
Katie... ohmagod but I do detest any sort of paperwork these days!!!
I have wondered for Mom about hospice myself as she is completely bedridden and not really getting any better...in a sort of limbo with everything, just UTI's every few weeks. Maybe they would think she wouldn't be ready for this. Hashing through all the prescriptions and insurances etc. is awful as we have enough to worry about right now. Thanks again, and I hope everyone's day starts going better. I am going to try to get some rest when I can and stay out of the cold...
hearing things = mild phsycosis . perfectly normal for someone in your current situation . you know i aint no damm doctor but i cut wood for one ..
thats pretty close .
the master of self illusion upstairs came back home today and decided she needed some firewood . ( duh ) . so ive been hauling a couple of trk loads with her sons help . toes are cold ..
if they want you to give medications you do not agree with or they have effects you don't like after you have started you don't have to give them to her. She can continue on any medications as usual and hospice will pay for those related to her terminal diagnosis but for example if she is diabetic and admitted with dementia you will continue to get them through your regular pharmacy as usual cost. No cost to you for meds given for comfort ie sedatives or nausia. They will offer antibiotics for UTIs or pneumonia but it's your choice to treat, If she falls and breaks something they will probably discharge her while she recieves treatment in hsopital but readmit when she returns home. It is very flexible but they do have to follow medicare guidelines and they also have to watch their budget carefully because they recieve a set amount per day for each patient. Some hospices are brtter endowed than others so can spend more and hire more staff etc. You do get the advantage of a five day respit at certain intervals and again i don't remember how frequently. Certainly worth investigating at this time so you know exactly what is available when the time comes. You are totally free to discharge her if there is a certain treatment you think may help her
Hope, glad your Mama is having a somewhat better day today...
FF - I know what you mean - Mom's prescription costs have steadily increased since Dad died. She never had a co-pay for her prescriptions when Dad was alive. He died, and -bang - copay. Last year, there was never a single prescription that didn't have a copay, so apparently she never hit her deductible in full. So far this year, they have gone up significantly in price - where I was paying $60-$70 a month before for her copays, now I'm paying well over $100. Not complaining too much, because it could be worse, but still...
Jeanette...hang in there, hun. I don't think your instinct is too far off, I'm sorry to say. I think you need to get with her doc, and soon. Discuss options and what comes next. ((Hugs))
Do I need to go through her doctor for hospice? At our last visit he scheduled her for a 2 month check up vs the normal 1 month? The thing with hospice is I worry they'll change her meds or give her too much dopey stuff. Then I read where it's difficult to get an AD patient on hospice, something about "failure to thrive" mimics AD symptoms . If my head doesn't explode... perhaps living in a cave wouldn't be all that bad.
If I were in your place, I'd be sneaking behind my father's back, signing him up for coverage! Yes, I would sign his name and everything. At this point, I wouldn't care.
My parents no longer have Rx insurance because Dad's employer's retirement fund has changed.... Dad needs to sign up with a Rx insurance and pay the monthly premium. Dad doesn't like that idea and doesn't want to sign up.... he and Mom were spoiled by all those years of the retirement fund paying for those premiums.
So, Dad new doctor said Dad needs his blood pressure pills because Dad said he was getting chest pain.... ok, took the Rx prescription to a pharmacy, it was paid out of pocket, over $100 for 30 days worth of pills. Dad wasn't a happy camper about that, wanted to return the pills until Mom talked some sense into him that he NEEDS to take the pills.
Dad thought the $100 was outrageous.... well, Dad, welcome to how the rest of the world lives.... $100 is actually cheap compared to the cost of other blood pressure pills. My blood pressure pills would be a lot more if I paid out of pocket.
I am hoping when I call my parents this afternoon that Dad was able to sign up. I am afraid with all the dragging of his feet on this, he had missed the final dead-in to sign up. At least he was able to get their secondary health insurance which he grumbled about because he now has to pay a monthly premium.
Wish when companies change over their health insurance policies that they take into consideration that there are many elders on their retiree list and all this is so very confusing to them. Why not assign an advocate to help.
when were young we think there will ineviably come a time in our lives where we will be a little more secure . looking back on my life ( age 56 ) all i see are one body slam after another and im sure they will continue . lifes been good , im not fussing , but i dont expect it to ever be worry free .
i think i was wrong about that snow melt earlier . it looks more like 5 - 8 inches of snow tonight with only a slight rise in temps tomorrow , then back to the teens .
( damnt )
hope ,
all anyone needs is a little shack after theyre kids are raised . im the guy who owns one fork so i can attest to that minimalist concept . i live in my 8 x 24 foot basement bunker and have never felt more unburdened . if it werent for liking ice in my cold drinks id probably throw the fridge out .
Mama seems better this morning...seems to be resting a lot better and has had her breakfast and it has stayed down...thank you God for once again bringing her through yet another bug.....
Cold, cold, cold...did I say cold?? seems it is getting even colder and now I see snow clouds heading this way....I am a real nutcase about liking to have the yard raked totally clean before a pretty snow, but I lasted all of ten minutes out there and decided the snow will fall whether I rake the yard or not...way too cold to be out there, especially since I feel a possible sinus infection coming on..time to get my salt water and medicine dropper going...that always works....
gonna be a fun year . my current customer is a genius with interior and exterior design . the neatest stone projects ive ever built can be found at his previous home and ill give him 98 % of the credit for the design of said projects . i only added a teak or two .
dont get a big head . a slightly less risk to us than a criminal isnt all that big of compliment .
from,
you know who and you know where ..
i always read the news to determine how far satellite surveilance is progressing . in a recent news clip i saw that drones patrol the border by flying back and forth and looking for changes in the landscape such as a broken twig or a footprint . it doesnt really scare me but it should cause criminals some sleepless nights . im not condoning such an intrusive situation but its hard to denounce too when i feel criminals are a bigger threat to me / us than govt .
They have stopped using the ones in question now so everyone should be safe. Just another feast for the lawyers!!!!!!!!
Back then I could roll the TV, with rabbit ears, to the bathroom so I could watch TV while I [ahem] wait. Guess with today's technology one can bring with them their iPad.
I need to schedule another one but I keep putting it off as my parents are getting older. I keep saying "next year", every year.
imo you not only have to let em go but theres times you have to give em a shove . my youngest kid has for years thought that me and my little business existed solely to make sure he stayed high . i lost my sh*t with him over a year ago and hes went uphill ever since . good engine building job and his own apartment . if i get one email from him a year its ok with me . you cant manage their lives for them and wouldnt be doing them any favors if you did .