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Angela ~ My husband Alan is also combative and prone to rages. He too had been on Depakote. Since they added 50mg Seroquel in the am and 50 in the pm, he's been much better.
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I appreciate the feedback everyone-thank you!!! The doctor prescribed her Citalopram, is that the same as Seroquel?
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Angela, no it is generic for Celexa, it is an antidepressant, will take up to three weeks for you to see any changes in her. It is also used for anxiety, but concern is that it takes so long for it to get into the system, but may be good for the long haul... sure hope you find some answers soon.... hugs...
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Hubby gave me a few hour break today at the house so I could just rest. I did wake up to a 42 blood-sugar at 5:30am and had a 194 the night before-go figure. I actually got to take a 2 hr nap and it felt very good and of course after I got my b/s back in check. Monday is going to be fun for I have to get a fasting lab done in am and mnl don't like get up early. I try to bribe her for pancakes. ; )

ladee, we need to find humor to keep on trucking. I even throw some humor out to the mnl when she gets frustrated or confused about something and it helps sometimes. For instance, we have a small trash can by the toilet and I kept smelling pee in the bathroom real bad. I have already removed to the rug by toilet due to hubby I guess can't ring hole that big sometimes. : ) So, I check the tub rug and it looked fine and I took the trash can for it had toilet paper in it but I thought I empty it and then place it in tub and shut door to find that freaking piss smell! Well, sure enough it was in shower tub area from trash can. I have it in soaked with bleach.
Hubby tried to tell his mom to throw her tissue-toilet paper in the toilet and not the can. Well that was getting her all confused. Finally, we said if you wipe throw it in toilet. She responding, "just throw everything in toilet." I said no... you wouldn't throw your toothbrush in toilet. she responding, just like I wouldn;t throw myself in toilet and I said, yes! Needless to say, she started asking again about the toilet and I could see hubby losing it so I asked him to chill that we will just take the can out for awhile for it is a learning habit and problem solved. Yes!!! I knew this bachelor's sociology was going to come handy eventually. ; )

starri, I love my fried green tomatoes. Now they have fried pickles.
brandiwine, i would had chuck that old crock pot stuff right in toilet screaming or no screaming. Thank the Lord your hubby didn't get sick.

Broken leg, smacked in the face boy, I sure do have it made right now.

angelaleigh, take time to breathe and relax while she has her out. Great for you for a break just away a bit is awesome.

notlikemom, well, let her have her joy sometimes even though it in the wrong way. Cancer can take its toll? My mnl likes to compete sometimes when she is not telling me she is old. Like if I start stretching my legs for my muscle get all tight then, she will tell me, "I can do that.:" I am like go for it for its got to be good for her. hey, it gets her off the chair. ; )

jam, that idea of "Snickers candy bar in her coffee....vanilla ice cream in coffee." sounds pretty good! Look at all those flavor coffees out on the market. Hey, Y'all could get rich by starting a new taste of coffee-and call it, "snicker coffee or snicker-doodle coffee. : )
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Well dinner is cooking its chicken and mashed potatoes tonight. Tonight after the kids go to bed going to slip in the laundry room for a luau but things have improved a lil bit except for asking an extension just so I can get the award letters I need and getting the proof showing I am the owner of all policies. I get to have the whole family for next wk and pay off a credit card bills are due once more. Does anyone know a legit company looking for data entry that I can do from home so I can keep my eye on hubby and earn some extra money to help with bills. Pls let me know..I am already asking for more hrs but it seems like I won't get them.
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Morning to all... Hope yesterday was a better day for all. I finally went to the clinic yesterday morning..knew I needed to get better before hubby leaves for work. Got all fixed up. This morning I am much better. Hubby and I had day off yesterday so I was also able to rest most of the afternoon. We were in town eating dinner ...when our caregiver called..dad had slipped out of his chair. We rushed home and hubby got him up..no injuries. He has been a little more alert the past couple of days after he had his B12 shot. He goes Tuesday for the procrit shot and hopefully hear from doc about blood results that dads primary doc faxed to him. Dad does have some inflammation that primary doc thinks could be coming from bone marrow.. Wanted us to see hematologist first. Hopefully I will be in a better frame of mind and feel better physically. Hubby has given me time to rest body fhese last two weeks..
Pray everyone has the best day possible and that we all can have a little down time during the day to refresh our minds during our cargiving day.
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vickie vic, I am glad to hear you finally went to the clinic. I need to go to the Dr. too for this cough, but just can't see paying $95 for her to tell me I have a cough... no insurance... so will just have to gut it out...remember the good ol' days when we could just call our Dr's and ask them to 'send something out'...
Did they ever find out what is causing dad's stiffness? I know the procrit shot will help him to feel better, but won't fix this stiff body syndrome he has, wish they could give you some answers without having to run so many damned tests then send you somewhere else for more tests.....prayers for you and your family... glad hubby has been there and sorry you got your meal interrupted... but no big deal I guess in the bigger picture of things huh....Give that precious hubby a hug from me and tell him Thank You for making your life easier when he is home.....he is deeply appreciated..
Was up most of the night coughing, so today should just be lovely....but am going to stick my ugly attitude somewhere and go on about my day....
I know there are some rocks on the back roads that I haven't seen yet.... hugs and angels to you all..... the angels are to help lighten your load....
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Hey y'all!! Just wanted to drop a line and tell you guys I got an awnser on aunties condition. Well sorta. She didn't have any cognitive test done but we saw the vascular doctor a couple days ago. He said her cartoid arteries were not blocked any more than they were a year ago. Auntie pipes up and tell him she's been forgting a lot of things and can tell she gets awful confused sometimes. She told him how she wakes up thinking someone else is in the room. He said there wasn't much could be done about that. I asked if it was from the srteries in her neck. He says no...then turns to me and starts explaining how in therory what's going on in her neck and heart arteries is happening in her brain as well. And that it is proggressive. Not much they can do but control blood pressure. He explained hopw parts of her brain dies off. Told me how to reconize the different symptoms she has. And explained how to tell between heart blockage and brain blockage, telling me both things are leading to her confusion. He was awsome. I wasn't even expecting to learn all that. I just felt like I needed to go to that appt. Cause I knew she would forget. I will write mire later. I'm super busy spring cleaning the outside. Love y'all.
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ASG- Glad that you were able to get some answers about your auntie. But sorry that there is nothing they can do to improve it. Love and hugs stormyyy
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Hmmm speaking of eating....auntiee is obsessed with food. A month ago she threw up couldn't eat much...she st.ill throws up coffee..and says she can't eat cereal anymore as it makes her sick. However, she can eat the shit outta chocalate pudding, milkshakes, cheese(yes allby its self, velveeta,sliced,shredded dosnt matter)5 slices at once. This morning 2 pudding wasn't enough,she ate all that we bought her yesterday 8 of those snack pack ppuddings. She comes out saying she had that and cinnimon gram crackers and she's still hungry, I was outta eggs she said she wanted something sweet anyway, so I gave her 2 cookies with m&ms on them, (m&m is somthing she is also obsessed about eating) oh honey I don't think that will go down. So we had bisquits and gravy, 10 min later she would take some moe chocolate if I could go to the store and get her some. I couldn't...she had kept me busy all morning trying to appease her appitite...oh yeah after she ate the cookies she also had an orange. Now tell how someone to sick to there stomach to eat cereal could handle oranges and biquits and gravy along with cookies cheese and chocalate pudding. And that was all before lunch. She got mad at me for not going to the store ato buy more "chocolate" and tried to open her can of. fruit...the one she already ate yesterday. She just knew she had one left.
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No sweetie its all gone, well I don't know where it went. She refuses ensure...boost, if dosnt want to eat something she says her taster is broken...and she can't taste anything so she needs something sweet..but boy oh boy try to feed her something normal she has a fit. Maybe I should try some oatmeal with a little haladol in it...oops did I say that. Oh lord. I don't know how on earth I'm gonna handle another summer with her coming out of her room with the sole purpose of being crappy to the kids, or to get extra attention.
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I really thought that was all over with, the 3 year old tantrums, the coming out to our part of the house, but nope for the last two days she has been rearing her ugly head.
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Good to hear from you ASG, sorry Auntie is on her bad behavior again.... maybe the kids will be so busy in the pool and with friends, and doing summer stuff, she'll leave them alone.... hugs for you for what you put up with.....
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Sorry to hear that ASG; sometimes we wish for the niceness and get shafted but i hope ladee is right with summer around the corner the kids will be out of her hair most of the time. Hubby had another break thru seizure episode tonight and complained that he couldnt see outta his good right eye. Is it possible for his seizure to affect his optic nerve since he had a stroke in 09. Meanwhile its still a battlefield to get him to the hospital but the kids are still up. I can finally say I beat the worst of this cold and almost back to normal hurrah for me. Things cannot get any better or worse than they are but I am glad i have my daughter here for the whole of spring break. It means I can keep my dinner date with her at the local chinese/cantonese restaurant and man do they serve up some good egg rolls. Its one of things I am gonna do with my gf once she gets down here and moved in... gonna take here there give her a real nice dinner out and pizza hut is too generic... lol
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Burned...I can't imagine how hard that would be to be dealing with a sick spouse. I'm so sorry, and am saying a special prayer for you tonight. Ladee thanks. At least its a starting point. I think I've known all along but to hear a doctor say he thinks so makes me feel not so crazy. He said with alz. She wouldnt be as aware of her problems. Cause she knows she only "thinks" someone is there, but lnows they are not. Alz. She would be upset and believe someone was there. That's what had me so hung up on if she had dementia or not. Because she is so aware of most of her problems. It crazy, this girl who used to come to my house, auntie would get so angry and would be so rude when she would come over, I just had to ask her to not come in. Auntie dosnt even remember who this girl is anymore. When I mentioned the girls name. She goes who is that? I said oh you know, she was kinda chubby. She said no I don't. I said oh remember, she had the lil baby, she's like oh yeah...but had the most puzzeled look on her face, she was here like a year ago. Its after 1 a.m. and I can hear her walker squeaking in the other room. I swear she's up most the night. I hope all the caregivers have a good day tommarrow. Night.
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ASG, yes it helps to have someone validate what we see and hear and experiance, because we start to wonder who is the one with the disabilities, them or us....and you have been at this a long time with Auntie, so prayers for you to have the strength to keep your hands from around her grumpy neck....
And by now the kids have learned how to avoid her for the most part. And you are an awesome woman Tina, juggling Auntie, kids, home, and hubby being gone , you just amaze me.... I have never been that 'unselfish' in my life.... so I feel blessed that you set an example for me, AND you have a sense of humor..... and what ever you put in her oatmeal, we won't tell...deal? deal!!!!!.....love and hugs to you and prayers for you and your family....
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Started my day off really early hoping to be able to catch up on some well needed house and yard work!!! Seems like every time I start something is when mom wants me. Most of the time it is just an answer to a simple question. I think that she just wants me to sit with her all day.
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D?..can you get your mom to sit on the porch and watch you work? Ibring dad out when I am outside..he gets another view of the world and fresh air for a little while.
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My cold is tolerable..dad started coughing yesterday...hope I can nip it before it gets bad. We all went to church yesterday..was windy and the tree pollen was all over the place. Yuck!
Ladee hope you ground something for cough..it is sooo miserable. I miss this days when u could call and they would send something. Can you ask pharmacist? I call mine and they help when they can.
ASG..know it was a real relief to hear doc tell you about symptoms and why...even though ther is nothing that can be done you have some peace of mind knowing.
Dads primary doc Wants hematologist to see bloodwork because he thinks dads stiff movements may be due to some of the bone marrow stuff. I don't think so ..but hey what do I know. He did tell me to bring him in if hematologist doesn't think it has anything to do with the anemia. I am thinking they could give him some steroids at first but really think he needs the levodopa cause I think it is coming from his brain.. But again hey..what do I know. Think doc will work with me once we see hematologist and get his take.. Don't know if we be able to see him tomorrow when dad gets procrit shot. Dad has so much wrong with him..the docs have a real hard time diagnosing anything. Mom wasn't feeling too well yesterday hope she isn't as tired today.
It sure is a pretty day here maybe I can get out later in the garden...go with the flow...
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Catching up on the posts always reminds me that I am not alone and that Mom is not the only horrible patient in the world. There is strength in numbers.
Vic-sorry your dinner got interrupted, but at least it wasn't a major crisis. Hugs.
ASG-Glad you got some answers! Those are some strange foods. And I thought Mom was bad with her name-brand-only and can't-eat-this-and that routine!
Burned-At least someone is making use of the laundry room. LOL Most days, I'd like to start there in the morning and stay all day.
Well, another weekend is over. And it was pretty much the same as the others...a bit of niceness from Mom, and alot more meaness and foolishness. Oh well. I find myself being very crabby lately. It's like I can take only so much, then something pushes me over the edge. I'm hoping this is just a phase for me. At least it's better than before, when I wanted to scream every day.
Radiation starts tomorrow. Three weeks Monday-Friday. I will only go on Tuesdays when the doctor rounds, otherwise Dad will take her. And as soon as that's done, she has another brain MRI. I sure hope all this radiation isn't a waste because she's got more brain tumors. But she knew that was a risk, and wants to do it anyway.
Hope everyone is having a good day.
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Im overwhelmed to say the least today. The family finally came to the conclusion that we need to place grandma in a facility. It was hard enough to make the decision but after much research we find out she makes TOO LITTLE money from Retirement and SSI to pay for assisted living or nursing home. She makes TOO MUCH to get approved for Medicaid. What in the world do they expect us to do???? 4 or 5 places keep saying, use her spend down. How do I spend down $1600/month in Medical when she has no other issues besides severe dementia? IS THERE NO HOPE??? and no she is not a Veterans wife....that was our last hope.
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Angela.....you might want to talk with an elder care attorney about your options. Here is what we did for the col because she has SS, her retirement, plus a widow's military pension. We set up an Irrevocable Trust with both of us listed as the Trustees. We are the only ones who can remove any funds.....technically she no longer owns the account, we do. Her monthly income goes into the account but since she doesn't "own" it she can become eligible for Medicaid. The hitch is that Medicaid will pay for her stay in a home.....when she dies then we will get a bill to reimburse Medicaid for everything they paid on her behalf. If the money is not there then the bill is forgiven, but we have to be able to show that the money is not there because it was spent on her care. That means clothing, meds if needed, diapers, doctor visits, eye glasses...anything for her care. And yes, funeral arrangements could be included. And believe it or not you can buy a vehicle with their funds as long as it's outfitted with something to make it handicap accessible so that it's easier for your loved one to get in and out of it. An elder care attorney can explain all of your options. Don't let this get you down.....it's workable.....sending a hug your way!
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Vic- Thanks for the suggestion. I've thought about taking her outside while I work but the pollen is so bad right now and I'm afraid it would make her breathing worse. I was able to get the grass cut and it felt great. I enjoy working in my yard, it seems to clear my mind.
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Welcome D! Glad to see you here and hope you will find this a comfortable place to come. When my mil was still living here I would have my hands full with her wanting to be right in the middle of what I was doing outside. Even when I insisted she just sit at the table and look pretty while I worked, she still wanted to lie on the ground and pull weeds. I like to be outside also puttering around in my garden. And I will even get the riding mower out and before you know it I have the whole yard mowed....we live in the country and have about a 5 acre yard, so I have lots of room to think.....lol

ASG......isn't it funny to hear Aunt tell you she knows she has mental problems? I have to laugh when the col says "I have Alzheimer's, that's why I can't remember things"........
ladee.....hope Marie was good today. How are you feeling? Much better I hope......

I worked outside in the yard for most of the day. We set the dried grass on fire around the inside of the pond.....have tried to get the darn stuff to burn for 5 years and finally this year it took off. The Canadian geese "regulars" weren't very happy that we disturbed momma's nesting but they settled back down to business. So I'm taking it easy tonight with very sore muscles.......

Hope everyone has had a great day and will soon have a peaceful night....hugs to all!
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JAM...I have not heard of that but just hearing a NEW IDEA gives me hope!! I will look into this! Thank you so much! Its 2:30am and I am awake stressing about this....but your information gives me hope...so Im going to bed now!!! Thank you for the "tuck in" haha! Goodnight all! or good morning to some of you. THIS CARE GIVER IS POOPED. zzzzzzzzzzzzz
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I have been working out in the yard pruning the snowball butrees and the butterfly bush and racking and weeding and will be starting the sunflower seeds soon but last night we had a freeze so will have to check the baby rhubard plants that just came up but there are lots that I have not uncloverd so they should be ok-my lawn needs mowing allready-lots of work to do outside-at least I was able to sleep last night after being out in the fresh air.
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I did pick daffodils and put them in a vase, but it's March again here and colder. No more June 80 degree days for awhile. Still need to finish raking, so it's good weather for that.
Both hubby and son are laid off. It happens this time of year in construction. I knew it was coming, but I'm stressing anyway being the only one working with 5 mouths to feed. This too shall pass.
Dad's leg looks alot better. The calander is FULL with Mom's radiation every day and all the other appointments. April will be a busy month.
Hugs to all!
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Sonny and I even worked in the yard yesterday, we pulled weeds, he hasn't been very active this winter, so we pulled a few and sat for awhile, he seemed to enjoy being outside... he has had this bad cold too, she finally was giving him his meds like she was supposed to, so he is much better now....
Notlike, do your parents not contribute to the family income??? I would think they would at least pay something to help with lights and gas. Much cheaper than a NH....Will hubby and son be able to take some of the traveling stress off of you by taking parents to Dr. and radiation???? Sorry things are so onesided for you, you will definately need a vacation soon... love and hugs...
Austin, sorry to hear about your friend Winnie, you are in my prayers and enjoy working in the yard...
Everyone else, have a good day if you can, get outside for a little while if you can, let the sunshine hit your face for a few minutes... love ya'll....
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D- know what you men about the pollen! It has been terrible here too. Dad gets sinus crud easily so I havent been able to get him out much so I can play in the yard. Today wind was down .. So I have dad and mom both sitting on porch. Nice!

Well dad had appt today to get procrit shot ... His red blood count was good so he didn't need shot. But they didn't get other bloodwork from primary doc.. So no answers about inflammation .. Just feel down and like I am getting a run around. Hematologists nurse was real sweet and understanding of the situation..she is going to call the other docs office to get the bloodwork ..talk to the doc and call me to let me know what is going on. Not really going to hold my breath for any answers. Figure I am going to have to take dad to see primary doc for him to check him out again before I can get any help. Such is life...
Hope everyone is hanging in there and having the best day possible.
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That is terrible in this day and age that you have to wait for results when they are available so fast to the docs.
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